Showing results by author "Joseph J. Bailey" in All Categories

No one should ever come between a man's family and his guns. Not if they want to live. Not even a demon prince, a sorcerer supreme, or a ruthless dragon. Or a demonic horde. Especially when those guns belong to a spellslinger. Koren D'uene's enemies have a death wish, for he is a ja'lel, a gun knight, and his is the job of granting wishes. His guns spoke and enemies fell. The Spellslinger Chronicles are weird westerns, Wild West-inspired fantasy adventure novels, featuring the exploits of Koren D'uene, cowboy wizard and gun knight. This collection includes: Infernal Fire - book 1 of the ...

Yip Chi Chuan, a young martial and spiritual ascetic, must flee as the only home he has ever known, the ancient monastery of the Priests of K’un Lun, is destroyed by a newly ascendant extradimensional evil. Cast out and alone, Yip strikes out on a quest spanning the breadth of his home world of Ea’ae and into the greater macroverse beyond in an attempt to unseat an all-consuming Darkness rooted in his once vaunted order’s distant past. Will Yip, the last of his kind to walk the wide world beyond his fallen sanctuary, succeed where his mighty brethren failed in ages past? Unfortunately...

Are you a Gnome? Do you want to be one? Do you know what one is? Do you have magical, technical, or any other talent whatsoever? (1) Do you pine after a non-holographic Omnicron, make design sketches of transmorphic actionable multidimensional exo-robotic systems, create novel subroutines for synthetic intelligences, tinker with Dwarf-proof beard mowers, imagine a grand unified theory of life, the universe, and facial hair, or take apart and modify negentropy cannons for fun and amusement? Do you like root vegetables? If you answered yes to one of these questions (2), then you may have what...

Heaven has fallen. The legions of Chaos have overrun the world. Uërth is in ruins. With the Heavenly Host’s fall, Angel Swords rained from the heavens, littering the world in what was. Only the most honorable and purest of heart are able to take up the Angel Swords and wield them against the throngs of Chaos. These mighty Empyrean Knights are all that stand between Uërth and annihilation. Saedeus is neither pure of heart nor honorable. Nor does he wish to wield an Angel Sword. He just wants to be left alone with his mushrooms. And his pet rock. But he might not have a choice. When he ...

The city of Alyon is in trouble. Its citizens are turning into monsters. Not the good kind of monsters—terrifying, bloodthirsty, flesh-rending, citizen-killing monsters. When Grak’s favorite barkeep tells him that he will get a lifetime supply of free alcohol if he can figure out why the bar’s patrons are disappearing, Grak is on the case! Grak - Private Instigator is a humorous supernatural detective fantasy about a down-on-his-luck orc who solves crimes with his fists.

Grak is just an orc trying to get by. He also happens to be a private investigator. Who solves crimes with his fists. Join Grak on his many misadventures in this omnibus edition of the Orc PI series. Included in this complete edition are Grak - Private Instigator, Grak - Orc on Vacation, and Grak - Gnomercy. Grak - Private Instigator The city of Alyon is in trouble. Its citizens are turning into monsters. Not the good kind of monsters--terrifying, bloodthirsty, flesh-rending, citizen-killing monsters. When Grak's favorite barkeep tells him that he will get a lifetime supply of free alcohol ...

After saving the spaceways by choking a ship-devouring demon with his fists before going on vacation to watch the Macroversal Wizarding Championships, Grak returns home to find the city of Alyon in turmoil.
 Or at least mildly disturbed.
 Citizens are disappearing.
 And the ones vanishing just so happen to be Grak’s friends.
 Hounded by dimension-hopping ningnome assassins, Grak must track down his friends before they disappear permanently.

 Grak – Gnomercy is a quirky supernatural detective fantasy novel of roughly 50,000 words.

No one should ever come between a man’s family and his guns. Not if they want to live. Not even a dragon. Especially when those guns belong to a spellslinger. The dragon who had killed his brother had a death wish. Koren D’uene is a ja’lel, a gun knight, and his is the job of granting wishes. His guns spoke and the world listened. Spellslinger is a weird western, a Wild West-inspired fantasy novel full of cowboy wizards and spell-slinging outlaws of roughly 40,000 words.

So you want to be a wizard? You know being a wizard is not all quests filled with high adventure, finding priceless treasure, warm adulation and reward, and uncovering newfound knowledge? You really want to be ensorcelled by fell magics, accosted by boisterous knights, enchanted by hostile magicians, waylaid by villainous rogues, attacked by creatures from the nether realms, cursed by dread warlocks, and worse? And those on some of your better days? Seriously? Are you crazy? If you are (crazy, not serious… serious is optional), then Mulogo is the wizard for you and Mulogo’s Treatise on ...

So you want to be a villain? You do know that being a villain isn't all fun-filled romps in dank, lightless tombs, incendiary encounters with intellectually stunted heroes, joyously crushing the hopes and dreams of unsuspecting innocents, accumulating vast hordes of ill-gotten wealth, and advancing your agenda on a world unappreciative of your greatness? (1) You really want to be hunted by unethical vigilantes(2), chased by grown adults wearing skintight suits, ostracized from (in)decent society, forced to forge ahead in a universe largely opposed to your relentless pursuit of self-interest...

Just because you're short, crotchety, seldom bathe, like to drink, and have a beard doesn't make you a Dwarf. (1) To see how much you differ from the typical (2) Dwarf, you have but to read Confessions of an Angry Dwarf. If you still think you're a Dwarf after reading this concise guide to Dwarfdom, then you will not be the only one full of surprise. Confessions of an Angry Dwarf will correct (3) any (4) misperceptions you may have about the ancient and noble traditions of Dwarfdom. If you're a bit more certain about your identity but have ever wanted to explore the inner workings of the ...

Heaven has fallen. The legions of Chaos have overrun the world. Uërth is in ruins. With the Heavenly Host’s fall, Angel Swords rained from the heavens, littering the world in what was. Only the most honorable and purest of heart are able to take up the Angel Swords and wield them against the throngs of Chaos. These mighty Empyrean Knights are all that stands between Uërth and annihilation. Soul Stealer Saedeus is neither pure of heart nor honorable. Nor does he wish to wield an Angel Sword. He just wants to be left alone with his mushrooms. And his pet rock. But he might not have a ...

No one should ever come between a man’s family and his guns. Not if they want to live. Not even a demon. Or a demonic horde. Especially when those guns belong to a spellslinger. The demons who killed his father had a death wish, for Koren D’uene is a ja’lel, a gun knight, and his is the job of granting wishes. His guns spoke, and demons fell. Infernal Fire is a weird western, a Wild West-inspired fantasy adventure novel of roughly 50,000 words.

The Exceptional Advice for Adventurers Everywhere series provides a range of proven (1) advice for professions that don’t exist. (2) This complete edition includes all four novellas in the Exceptional Advice for Adventurers Everywhere tetralogy. Included are: Mulogo's Treatise on Wizardry Mulogo's Treatise provides a concise summary in plain (well, mostly plain) language for wizards who wish to have a manual for surviving in a harsh world where people (and much nastier) want to kill you and take your stuff (usually in that order). (4) Everygnome’s Guide to Paratechnology Within this ...

Kensaro Hatanu’s soul was born the day his master handed him his first sword. Except Kensaro’s master did not hand him a sword to walk the path of the otana hanji, the sword saints of legend. His teacher handed Kensaro a broom. A broom to clean the monastery. While the other martial ascetics of Guai Lu practiced their physical and spiritual disciplines, Kensaro swept, mopped, and dusted, imagining he was slaying monsters, saving villagers, and meting out justice. Until the demons came and his broom was called to action. Master of the Flying Broom is a wuxia and xianxia-inspired coming-...

Arcwhistle Goldpulley has everything a gnome technowizard could want and more. He’s just successfully defended his after-post thesis on harnessing the metamagical residuals of energetic creation and destruction, along with a dramatic demonstration of an application of his theory, one which only blew up two learning halls on campus, and completed his formal education as a master archmage. He is a successful paratechnologist, a gnomish master of blending magic and science, often to explosive effect. He has developed and licensed many significant inventions ranging from autonomous eyebrow ...

James Halloway and Ranjeet Srinivasa are the founders of Aethereum Enterprises, the world’s leading technology firm. Jim and Ranjeet have spent their careers designing, building, and selling novel machine cores and upgraded neural learning programming suites, creating smart software to improve or supplant human capabilities, and inventing innovative analytical solutions. But these businesses are but means to this end. What they really want is to create a computer that can produce novel insights and understanding, a machine capable of generating new thoughts. And not just any thoughts, but...

Chet has a problem. A few of them in fact. He’s been kicked out of his order of holy knights. He’s depressed, he’s let himself go, and he has something of an inferiority complex. Mostly because he wields holy socks to fight demons while his friends use flaming swords, shimmering spears, and holy hand grenades. Now Sigil, the order of holy knights that threw him out, wants him back because its members are dying and no one can figure out why. Can Chet pick himself up off the couch long enough to do what other demon hunters can’t? Only time, and lots of pizza, will tell. Demon Hunter ...

Some say the world will end in fire and ash, others frost and ice, still others dust and dissolution. I say it will end in tentacles. Lots of tentacles.

He woke to a dying world. AI’s failing. Datastreams withering. The Verse crumbling. Populations shattered. Civilizations lost. And his thoughts were on his lost love. He had every right to be selfish. His self was all he had left. The nanoswarms had taken everything else.