Shush Hooman - Book 2 (More conversations with my cat)

By: Bob Carrington

Narrated by: Virtual Voice

Viking Cats most definitely played a part in the incursions against England. Of this there is no doubt, despite efforts by so called “real” historians to cover this up. What is unclear is why there is little mention of Saxon Cats. One theory is that Saxons preferred dogs, usually big, mangy, smelly beasts that hunted stags and eat babies.

Editors note; the eating of babies was usually blamed on the Viking invaders to scare the Saxon populace.

Several famous Viking Cats do exist in history but probably as a hybrid of several heroic felines. For example, Balder Blackclaw was a fierce fighter but few facts remain of his exploits, and similarly, Ragnar Smoothtail who was skilled in the mystic arts. However, Frode Wolffur was known as both a skilled fighter and a practitioner of the dark feline arts, but his existence remains unverified.

Anyway, this is all true because Lagertha told me. So it is. Speaking of which……

Cat: So, you fancy being a Viking then?
Me: Well, I like what I know about the culture, but……
Cat: You should give it a try. Get out in the fresh air. Occasional boat trips. Bit of pillaging, err, other stuff.
Me: I think I'm a bit old and creaky to go pillaging. Anyway, I'm not sure the authorities take too kindly these days to raiding peaceful settlements as a pastime.
Cat: Shame. I could come with you. It'd be fun. Is Lindisfarne still there?
Me: Lindisfarne? Do you know some old tales then? Perhaps handed down through the caterations.
Cat: Well, catlore prevents me from going into too much detail, but perhaps I could tell you a bit of a story.
Me: Ooh, yes please.
Cat: Okay then, here is the tale of a heroic feline I'll call Sigurd Redwhiskers, known as Siggy by his hooman companions. One day…..”