Why Do I Do That?

Psychological Defense Mechanisms and the Hidden Ways They Shape Our Lives

By: Joseph Burgo PhD

Narrated by: John Raines

This is a self-help book for people who don't usually buy self-help books. Instead of offering cognitive-behavioral techniques for dealing with anger, or affirming strategies to boost self-esteem, this self-help book adapts the basic methods of psychodynamic psychotherapy to a guided course in self-exploration, highlighting the universal role of defense mechanisms in warding off emotional pain. Even the best self-help books tend to stay on the surface. Why Do I Do That? instead probes deeply into the unconscious. With easy-to-understand explanations, the first part teaches you about the unconscious mind and the role of psychological defenses in excluding difficult feelings from awareness. Individual chapters in the longer middle section explore the primary defense mechanisms one by one, with exercises to help you identify your own defenses at work. The final part offers guidance for how to "disarm" your defenses and cope more effectively with the unconscious feelings behind them. Psychological defense mechanisms are an inevitable and necessary part of the human experience; but when they become too pervasive or deeply entrenched, they may damage our personal relationships, restrict or distort our emotional lives and prevent us from behaving in ways that promote lasting self-esteem. Why Do I Do That? promotes self-help for listeners who want to improve their relationships, manage their emotional lives more effectively and develop authentic self-esteem that will last. If you find that even the best self-help books lack depth and fail to instigate lasting change, this psychodynamic self-help book may be for you.

©2012 Joseph Burgo (P)2016 Joseph Burgo

Very Interesting!

This is a book that will be more interesting every time you read or listen to it! Very informative and I think everyone could learn something about themselves from it.

great

this book was great, take the parts that work for you and do your best

Interesting to listen to

This book does a great job of analyzing psychological defense mechanisms and explaining them in a way that is relatable.

Excellent insights, will be returning multiple times

It’s legitimately made a positive impact in my life and I haven’t even sat down and done the exercises yet, I’m saving that for my second time through. But already I’m seeing a positive difference in my life.

Sucks to find out this has been an audiobook since 2016 and just in print since 2012 and I could’ve just been living better this whole time, but I guess that’s the grief of lost time Dr. Burgo talks about.

Great book, really interesting & relatable!

Wish there was a recommended works! So I could continue with exploring my self. I mean mainly that I don't think all the questions he provides to ask yourself might not be enough.

Insightful book; should have included a PDF

The book itself is very insightful, but it does itself a disservice by not having an accompanying PDF for the exercises and some of the lists within the book that would be easier to digest in written form.

Relatable

Really easy to understand and apply to your life in thoughtful and practical ways. Found myself thinking back on my own shortcomings ha and how to pause and rethink.

Self-Defense Mechanisms: A Primer

Narration: A bit slow. Recommend increasing download to "1.25."

Content: Clear explanations of the different types of defense-mechanisms, their function and typology.


Note: Object Relations Theory clearly explained. Interesting that so simple a concept has so awkward a name. Must be why so many academics have difficult giving a clear, succinct explanation of Object Relations theory.

highly recommended

I would be re-listening this book quite many number of times. anyone interested in exploring defense mechanisms for self work.. this book will be of great help

The most insightful no nonsense self-help book

I found this book at just the right time. Wholeheartedly recommended. This book is a no nonsense approach to understanding yourself and your relationships in life. Particularly focusing on our self defense mechanisms and why we seem to always revert to the same way of reacting to situations. Firmly rooted in psychoanalysis , what you learn from this book will certainly augment your analysis sessions. A big take away for me was that self understanding is an ongoing practice like learning a musical instrument, the more you focus on improving the more you will be able to recognize the triggers in your life before they blindside you.