The Trauma of Shame and the Making of the Self
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The Trauma of Shame and the Making of the Self
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Narrated by:
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Mel Golliday
About this listen
Shame influences more of our thoughts and actions than many other emotions. Used as a punishment for bad behavior, shame acts as an incentive for us to behave in socially acceptable ways. As a common method used to regulate children’s behavior, shame is by far one of the most pervasive socializing agents. Many of our more persistent, punitive, and critical feelings about ourselves stem from humiliations in early childhood even if we don’t remember the specific events that prompted them.
While we all experience shame from time to time, when shame becomes toxic, it can play a central role in our life-long development and functioning. At its worst, shame can become a devastating attack on one’s personhood and a threat to the integrity of the self.
Many books on shame and the process of healing have been written, but few have been written specifically from a psychodynamic depth psychology perspective. It is intended that The Trauma of Shame and The Making of the Self will make an important contribution to that effort.
Shelley Stokes, PhD, and Sherron Lewis, LMFT. Authors of Letting Go and Taking the Chance to be Real (Lewis and Stokes, 2017).
©2018 Shelley Stokes and Sherron Lewis (P)2021 Shelley StokesListeners also enjoyed...
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By: Darlene Lancer
-
Highly Intuitive People
- 7 Right-Brain Traits to Change the Lives of Intuitive-Sensitive People
- By: Heidi Sawyer
- Narrated by: Heidi Sawyer
- Length: 6 hrs and 57 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall5 out of 5 stars 42
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Performance5 out of 5 stars 33
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Story5 out of 5 stars 33
Do you struggle with small talk and prefer deep conversation? Are you extremely sensitive to other people's moods? Are you exhausted after being in busy places? If you've answered "yes" to any of the above questions, you may be a Highly Intuitive Person: someone who is especially sensitive to the energy of others. Highly Intuitive People, also known as Intuitive-Sensitives, are a refined group of sensitive people who are said to make up 15-20 per cent of the population.
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5 out of 5 stars
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Wow!
- By Raubo on 07-01-22
By: Heidi Sawyer
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When Your Mother Has Borderline Personality Disorder
- A Guide for Adult Children
- By: Daniel S. Lobel PhD
- Narrated by: Daniel S. Lobel PhD
- Length: 4 hrs and 23 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall4.5 out of 5 stars 42
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Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 32
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Story4.5 out of 5 stars 32
Growing up with a mom who has Borderline Personality Disorder (BPD) is difficult - but it’s still possible to have a functioning adult relationship with her. When Your Mother Has Borderline Personality Disorder provides you with crucial information for understanding the patterns behind her Borderline Personality Disorder, as well as the tools you need to start your own recovery process.
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5 out of 5 stars
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Great advice IF you decide to or must continue a relationship with someone with BPD
- By Sarah M. on 05-21-24
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Power
- Surviving & Thriving After Narcissistic Abuse
- By: Shahida Arabi
- Narrated by: Julie McKay
- Length: 9 hrs and 48 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall4.5 out of 5 stars 405
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Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 345
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Story4.5 out of 5 stars 348
Pathological mind games. Covert and overt put-downs. Triangulation. Gaslighting. Projection. These are the manipulative tactics survivors of malignant narcissists are unfortunately all too familiar with. As victims of silent crimes where the perpetrators are rarely held accountable, survivors of narcissistic abuse have lived in a war zone of epic proportions, enduring an abuse cycle of love-bombing and devaluation - psychological violence on steroids.
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5 out of 5 stars
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A “Powerful” book
- By Avid reader on 10-16-17
By: Shahida Arabi
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Perfectly Hidden Depression
- How to Break Free from the Perfectionism That Masks Your Depression
- By: Margaret Robinson Rutherford PhD
- Narrated by: Eleanor Caudill
- Length: 5 hrs and 51 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall4.5 out of 5 stars 64
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Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 54
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Story4.5 out of 5 stars 53
If you were raised to believe that painful emotions are a sign of weakness, or if being vulnerable has always made you feel unsafe, then you may have survived by creating a perfect-looking life - a life where you appear to be successful, engaged, and always there for others. The problem? You're filled with self-criticism and shame, and you can't allow yourself to express fear, anger, loss, or grief. You recognize something is wrong, but you're not sure what exactly - only that you feel trapped and alone. If this sounds like you, you may have perfectly hidden depression (PHD).
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5 out of 5 stars
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Amazing
- By Kimberly Davis on 10-27-20
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Recovering from Emotionally Immature Parents
- Practical Tools to Establish Boundaries and Reclaim Your Emotional Autonomy
- By: Lindsay C. Gibson PsyD
- Narrated by: Suzie Althens
- Length: 7 hrs and 16 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall5 out of 5 stars 565
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Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 474
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Story5 out of 5 stars 470
In this important sequel to Adult Children of Emotionally Immature Parents, author Lindsay Gibson offers powerful tools to help you step back and protect yourself at the first sign of an emotional takeover, make sure your emotions and needs are respected, and break free from the coercive control of emotionally immature parents.
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1 out of 5 stars
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Asinine
- By Amazon Customer on 07-14-20
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Already Free
- Buddhism Meets Psychotherapy on the Path of Liberation
- By: Bruce Tift MA
- Narrated by: Bruce Tift MA
- Length: 7 hrs and 17 mins
- Original Recording
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Overall5 out of 5 stars 427
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Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 356
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Story5 out of 5 stars 353
Freedom from unnecessary suffering is the goal of both Buddhism and modern psychotherapy, yet each approaches this intention from a very different perspective. "Buddhist practice helps us awaken to a well-being that is independent of our circumstances," explains Bruce Tift, "while Western psychotherapy helps us bring our disowned experience into awareness in order to live in a more skillful and satisfying way."
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5 out of 5 stars
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Extraordinary
- By Matt on 11-15-16
By: Bruce Tift MA
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Prodependence
- Moving Beyond Codependency
- By: Robert Weiss
- Narrated by: Corey Gagne
- Length: 4 hrs and 35 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall4.5 out of 5 stars 105
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Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 95
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Story4.5 out of 5 stars 93
In Prodependence, Weiss presents a research-based social and psychological understanding of human interdependence, accepting and even celebrating human interdependency in ways that are healthy and life-affirming for each person.
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3 out of 5 stars
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Great content but horrible voice
- By Amazon Customer on 03-23-21
By: Robert Weiss
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How to Be an Adult in Relationships
- The Five Keys to Mindful Loving
- By: David Richo
- Narrated by: David Richo
- Length: 9 hrs and 20 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall4.5 out of 5 stars 732
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Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 606
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Story4.5 out of 5 stars 603
"Most people think of love as a feeling," says David Richo, "but love is not so much a feeling as a way of being present." In this audiobook, Richo offers a fresh perspective on love and relationships - one that focuses not on finding an ideal mate, but on becoming a more loving and realistic person. Drawing on the Buddhist concept of mindfulness, How to Be an Adult in Relationships explores five hallmarks of mindful loving and how they play a key role in our relationships throughout life.
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1 out of 5 stars
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Missing text
- By Annah Nimouse on 07-26-19
By: David Richo
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Love Between Equals
- Relationship as a Spiritual Path
- By: Polly Young-Eisendrath
- Narrated by: Holly Palance
- Length: 8 hrs and 47 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall5 out of 5 stars 29
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Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 27
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Story4.5 out of 5 stars 27
Utilizing the wisdom of her years of personal and professional practice, Young-Eisendrath dismantles our idealized projections about love, while revealing how mindfulness and communication can help us identify and honor the differences with our partners and strengthen our bonds. These practical and time-tested guidelines are rooted in sound understanding of modern psychology and offer concrete ideas and the necessary tools to reinforce and reinvigorate our deepest relationships.
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3 out of 5 stars
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Insightful
- By Anonymous User on 07-06-23
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Thoughts Without a Thinker
- Psychotherapy from a Buddhist Perspective
- By: Mark Epstein M.D., His Holiness the Dalai Lama - foreword
- Narrated by: Mark Epstein M.D.
- Length: 7 hrs and 12 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall4.5 out of 5 stars 387
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Performance4 out of 5 stars 325
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Story4.5 out of 5 stars 319
Upon its first publication, this path breaking book launched an explosion of interest in how Eastern spirituality can enhance Western psychology. Since then, the worlds of Buddhism and psychotherapy have been forged into a revolutionary new understanding of what constitutes a healthy emotional life. In his insightful introduction, Mark Epstein reflects on this revolution and considers how it is likely to evolve in the future.
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3 out of 5 stars
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Content limited by presentation
- By Kindle Customer on 02-28-15
By: Mark Epstein M.D., and others
What listeners say about The Trauma of Shame and the Making of the Self
Average customer ratingsReviews - Please select the tabs below to change the source of reviews.
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Overall5 out of 5 stars
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Performance5 out of 5 stars
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Story5 out of 5 stars
- Joy D. Thompson
- 09-15-23
Insightful book
Very reinforcing for someone shamed and gaslighted from birth. Healing., highly recommend to humans that have been scapegoated by the whole narcissistic family.
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Overall5 out of 5 stars
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Performance5 out of 5 stars
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Story5 out of 5 stars
- Amazon Customer
- 05-15-23
Best book on Shame I have read
Hands down, this book illuminates the origin of shame better than any other book on the topic I have read thus far. I will definitely come back to it . I listened it on Audible and found it very comforting.
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