Irrelationship
How We Use Dysfunctional Relationships to Hide from Intimacy
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Irrelationship
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Narrated by:
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Aaron Welch
About this listen
An important and transformative guide that addresses the protective, yet dysfunctional dynamic where couples avoid genuine connection with an unsatisfying pattern of false intimacy. Drawing on their extensive clinical experience, the authors look at "song and dance" behavioral routines repeatedly performed by couples in irrelationships and delve into the most difficult emotions and actions to help listeners achieve personal breakthroughs.
Written for anyone who wants to understand unhealthy patterns and how to change them, Irrelationships will help listeners develop interpersonal skills, creating a new opportunity to heal and restore loving relationships.
Mark B. Borg, Jr., PhD, is a community psychologist and psychoanalyst, and a supervisor of psychotherapy at the William Alanson White Institute.
Grant H. Brenner, MD, is a board-certified psychiatrist in private practice, specializing in treating mood and anxiety disorders and the complex problems that may arise in adulthood from childhood trauma and loss.
Daniel Berry, RN, MHA, has practiced as a Registered Nurse in New York City since 1987 and has worked for almost two decades in community-based programs.
©2015 Mark B. Borg, Jr., Grant Hilary Brenner, and John Berry (P)2016 Mark B. Borg, Jr., Grant Hilary Brenner, and John BerryListeners also enjoyed...
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Paradigm Shift
- By Sydnee Adams-Hancock on 04-08-16
By: Lundy Bancroft, and others
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The Journey of the Heroic Parent
- Your Child's Struggle & The Road Home
- By: Brad M. Reedy Ph.D.
- Narrated by: Tom Parks
- Length: 8 hrs and 20 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall5 out of 5 stars 201
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Performance5 out of 5 stars 169
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Story5 out of 5 stars 169
When a child is hurting, it can be the most painful challenge a parent will face. With compassion and perspective, Dr. Brad Reedy offers hope and wisdom for children who struggle and the parents who love them. The Journey of the Heroic Parent will take you on a journey to a happier, healthier relationship with your struggling child - and yourself. Through lessons learned, mother, father, and child will achieve greater understanding, love, and humanity - no matter what the outcome.
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5 out of 5 stars
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Loved it! Will read over again and again!
- By wooplicity on 06-21-15
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I Want This to Work
- An Inclusive Guide to Navigating the Most Difficult Relationship Issues We Face in the Modern Age
- By: Elizabeth Earnshaw LMFT CGT
- Narrated by: Elizabeth Earnshaw LMFT CGT
- Length: 9 hrs and 27 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall4.5 out of 5 stars 45
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Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 38
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Story4.5 out of 5 stars 37
Elizabeth Earnshaw is here to help. The renowned Gottman therapist, founder of A Better Life Therapy, and influential Instagram therapist behind @lizlistens has helped to transform countless relationships. With I Want This to Work, she presents for today’s generation the most effective and proven steps for relationship success.
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3 out of 5 stars
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I want this to work too. Excellent information, excruciating execution
- By Sunny Bettley on 03-17-23
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The Breakup Bible
- The Smart Woman's Guide to Healing from a Breakup or Divorce
- By: Rachel Sussman
- Narrated by: Susan Boyce
- Length: 12 hrs and 6 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall4.5 out of 5 stars 111
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Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 91
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Story4.5 out of 5 stars 88
Psychotherapist and breakup expert Rachel A. Sussman, LCSW, reveals the secrets every woman needs to get her life back on track. Drawing on hundreds of counseling sessions she's conducted with women at all stages of recovery, Sussman developed a proven three-phase process for healing from a breakup.
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5 out of 5 stars
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lifesaver!
- By Dawson on 11-30-17
By: Rachel Sussman
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Loving People
- How to Love and Be Loved
- By: John Townsend
- Narrated by: Matthew Josdal
- Length: 7 hrs and 34 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall4.5 out of 5 stars 75
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Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 67
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Story5 out of 5 stars 67
Best-selling author Dr. John Townsend teaches you that love can actually be learned and gives you the steps and tools to become skilled in love. Using his trademark stories to flesh out the important principles, Dr. Townsend covers receiving love, connecting love, healing love, confronting love, romantic love, and surrendering love. Through his teaching, listeners will discover - and start enjoying - the words, actions, and experiences of authentic love.
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5 out of 5 stars
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Very insightful
- By Amazon Customer on 05-17-19
By: John Townsend
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Controlling People
- How to Recognize, Understand, and Deal with People Who Try to Control You
- By: Patricia Evans
- Narrated by: Xe Sands
- Length: 6 hrs and 34 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall4.5 out of 5 stars 350
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Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 293
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Story4.5 out of 5 stars 284
In Controlling People, best-selling author Patricia Evans tackles the "controlling personality" and reveals how and why these people try to run other people's lives. She also explains the compulsion that makes them continue this behavior - even as they alienate others and often lose those they love. Should you ever find yourself in the thrall of someone close to you, Controlling People is here to give you the wisdom, power, and comfort you need to be a stronger, happier, and more independent person.
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5 out of 5 stars
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EXTRAORDINARY
- By Rob on 02-27-14
By: Patricia Evans
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Taming Your Outer Child
- Overcoming Self-Sabotage and Healing from Abandonment
- By: Susan Anderson
- Narrated by: Randye Kaye
- Length: 9 hrs and 34 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall4.5 out of 5 stars 106
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Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 88
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Story4.5 out of 5 stars 89
Chances are, you've already had run-ins with your Outer Child - the self-sabotaging, bungling, and impulsive part of your personality. This misguided, hidden nemesis blows your diet, overspends, and ruins your love life. Your Outer Child acts out and fulfills your legitimate childlike needs and wants in the wrong place, at the wrong time, and in counterproductive ways: It goes for immediate gratification and the quick fix in spite of your best-laid plans.
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1 out of 5 stars
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Her voice made me cringe.
- By zoe on 02-15-21
By: Susan Anderson
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How to Improve Your Marriage Without Talking About It
- By: Patricia Love, Steven Stosny
- Narrated by: Laural Merlington
- Length: 6 hrs and 49 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall4.5 out of 5 stars 1,800
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Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 1,513
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Story4.5 out of 5 stars 1,493
Men are right. The "relationship talk" does not help. Dr. Patricia Love’s and Dr. Steven Stosny’s How to Improve Your Marriage Without Talking About It reveals the stunning truth about marital happiness: Love is not about better communication. It's about connection.
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5 out of 5 stars
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Must read if your on the verge of loosing it all!
- By Chris on 07-19-15
By: Patricia Love, and others
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The Fatherless Daughter Project
- Understanding Our Losses and Reclaiming Our Lives
- By: Denna D. Babul RN, Karin Luise PhD
- Narrated by: Tara Ochs, PhD Karin Luise, RN Denna D. Babul
- Length: 9 hrs and 44 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall4.5 out of 5 stars 81
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Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 68
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Story4.5 out of 5 stars 67
When Motherless Daughters was published 20 years ago, it unleashed a tsunami of healing awareness. When Denna Babul and Karin Luise couldn't find the equivalent book for fatherlessness, The Fatherless Daughter Project was born. The book will set fatherless women on the path to growth and fulfillment by helping them to understand how their losses have impacted their lives.
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5 out of 5 stars
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very healing and tremendously helpful
- By R. Mccloud on 01-14-18
By: Denna D. Babul RN, and others
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The Science of Stuck
- Breaking Through Inertia to Find Your Path Forward
- By: Britt Frank LSCSW
- Narrated by: Sasha Heinz, Britt Frank LSCSW
- Length: 7 hrs and 8 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall4.5 out of 5 stars 332
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Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 282
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Story4.5 out of 5 stars 280
We all experience stuckness in our lives. We feel stuck in our relationships, career paths, body struggles, addiction issues, and more. Many of us know what we need to do to move forward—but find ourselves unable to take the leap to make it happen. And then we blame and shame ourselves, and stay in a loop of self-doubt that goes nowhere. The good news is you’re not lazy, crazy, or unmotivated. In this empowering and action-oriented guide, you’ll discover why we can’t think our way forward—and how to break through what’s holding us back.
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5 out of 5 stars
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Mental health is a physical process
- By Meagen G. on 04-18-22
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Getting Past Your Past
- Take Control of Your Life With Self-Help Techniques from EMDR Therapy
- By: Francine Shapiro
- Narrated by: Karen White
- Length: 12 hrs and 2 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall4.5 out of 5 stars 830
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Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 695
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Story4.5 out of 5 stars 686
Whether we've experienced small setbacks or major traumas, we are all influenced by memories and experiences we may not remember or don't fully understand. Getting Past Your Past offers practical procedures that demystify the human condition and empower listeners looking to achieve real change. An easy conversational style, humor, and fascinating real life stories make it simple to understand the brain science behind why we get stuck in various ways and what we can about it.
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3 out of 5 stars
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NOT ENOUGH ON SOLUTIONS
- By MZHOLLAND on 08-20-12
By: Francine Shapiro
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Toxic Parents
- Overcoming Their Hurtful Legacy and Reclaiming Your Life
- By: Craig Buck, Susan Forward
- Narrated by: Jo Anna Perrin
- Length: 10 hrs and 32 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall4.5 out of 5 stars 768
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Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 647
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Story4.5 out of 5 stars 641
In this remarkable self-help guide, Dr. Susan Forward draws on case histories and the real-life voices of adult children of toxic parents to help you free yourself from the frustrating patterns of your relationship with your parents---and discover a new world of self-confidence, inner strength, and emotional independence.
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5 out of 5 stars
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Its worth a listen.
- By Amanda on 08-20-12
By: Craig Buck, and others
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Already Free
- Buddhism Meets Psychotherapy on the Path of Liberation
- By: Bruce Tift MA
- Narrated by: Bruce Tift MA
- Length: 7 hrs and 17 mins
- Original Recording
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Overall5 out of 5 stars 427
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Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 356
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Story5 out of 5 stars 353
Freedom from unnecessary suffering is the goal of both Buddhism and modern psychotherapy, yet each approaches this intention from a very different perspective. "Buddhist practice helps us awaken to a well-being that is independent of our circumstances," explains Bruce Tift, "while Western psychotherapy helps us bring our disowned experience into awareness in order to live in a more skillful and satisfying way."
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5 out of 5 stars
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Extraordinary
- By Matt on 11-15-16
By: Bruce Tift MA
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12 Smart Things to Do When the Booze and Drugs Are Gone
- Choosing Emotional Sobriety Through Self-Awareness and Right Action
- By: Allen Berger PhD
- Narrated by: Matthew Boston
- Length: 5 hrs and 24 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall4.5 out of 5 stars 32
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Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 25
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Story4.5 out of 5 stars 25
Allen Berger, PhD, draws on the teachings of Bill W. and psychotherapy pioneers to offer 12 hallmarks of emotional sobriety that, when practiced, give people the confidence to be accountable for their behavior, ask for what they want and need, and grow and develop a deeper trust in the process of life. These smart things include: understanding who you are and what's important to you; learning not to take others' reactions personally; trusting your inner compass; and taking responsibility for your reactions to problematic situations.
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5 out of 5 stars
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Rich exploration and application of ES principles
- By rdkemper on 08-12-23
By: Allen Berger PhD
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The Verbally Abusive Man, Can He Change?
- A Woman's Guide to Deciding Whether to Stay or Go
- By: Patricia Evans
- Narrated by: Laural Merlington
- Length: 7 hrs and 20 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall4.5 out of 5 stars 173
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Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 146
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Story4.5 out of 5 stars 148
Coupling stories of abused women and abusive men from her own case studies, Patricia Evans here gives you the tools you need to transform your relationship. Most important, she assures you that such a transformation is possible—given the right circumstances. Evans also helps you determine if your abuser really has changed—or if he’s merely creating the illusion of change. And if he hasn’t changed, Evans helps you decide whether it’s time to leave the relationship—and what to do when it is.
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5 out of 5 stars
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A gift to the emotionally violated
- By curious23m on 08-16-15
By: Patricia Evans
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Rethinking Narcissism
- The Bad - and Surprising Good - About Feeling Special
- By: Dr. Craig Malkin
- Narrated by: Kiff VandenHeuvel
- Length: 6 hrs and 6 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall4.5 out of 5 stars 499
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Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 429
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Story4.5 out of 5 stars 428
In Rethinking Narcissism listeners will learn that there's far more to narcissism than its reductive invective would imply. The truth is that narcissists (all of us) fall on a spectrum somewhere between utter selflessness on the one side and arrogance and grandiosity on the other. A healthy middle exhibits a strong sense of self.
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5 out of 5 stars
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Great info, but proceed with caution
- By Caterina M. Platt on 11-16-17
By: Dr. Craig Malkin
What listeners say about Irrelationship
Average customer ratingsReviews - Please select the tabs below to change the source of reviews.
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Overall5 out of 5 stars
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Performance5 out of 5 stars
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Story5 out of 5 stars
- Randal Weidenaar
- 10-12-16
insightful about the workings of relationship
This book helps us to understand the complexities of our relationships and how we play games that we're not even really aware of sometimes. By helping us identify the unhealthy ways we've been relating, it opens up new frontiers for healthy relationships.
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Overall5 out of 5 stars
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Performance1 out of 5 stars
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Story5 out of 5 stars
- L.L.
- 04-09-17
Great book -poorly edited audio/voice recording
Would you recommend this audiobook to a friend? If so, why?
I would recommend the content of the book, which is great! But I would not recommend the audiobook as there were many errors in the recording and it was poorly done. Too bad, because it's a great book.
How could the performance have been better?
A final edit.
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2 people found this helpful
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Overall5 out of 5 stars
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Performance3 out of 5 stars
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Story5 out of 5 stars
- Aaron Mitchum
- 09-12-16
A must read
The recording seems to be not the final draft. Once you hear the narrator flub a words and say, "Ah, I need to take that again." There are also weird audio discrepancies with the word, oxytocin. Other than that though, the performance is solid. Weird.
Anyways, fantastic book, very helpful. I'm a licensed therapist and psychoanalyst in training and I have learned a lot reading this.
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1 person found this helpful