For Better
The Science of a Good Marriage
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Narrated by:
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Cassandra Campbell
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By:
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Tara Parker-Pope
About this listen
We've all heard the statistic: Fifty percent of marriages end in divorce. Its enough to make many couples give up when the going gets rough, thinking that's what everybody else does. But what if it weren't true? What if, in fact, it's not only possible but often easier than you think to save a seemingly troubled relationship?
Those are the questions Tara Parker-Pope asked herself after her own divorce. An investigative journalist on the health and wellness beat, she turned to some of the top biologists, neuroscientists, psychologists, and other scientists for the facts about marriage and divorce.
Those facts were more positive and provocative than she'd ever expected, and For Better offers plenty of astonishing, eye-opening good news. Parker-Pope presents the science behind why some marriages work and others don't; the biology behind why some spouses cheat and others remain faithful; and the best diagnostic tools created by the most cutting-edge psychologists to assess the probability of success in getting married, staying married, or remarrying. There are questionnaires to uncover potentially damaging hidden attitudes toward spouses. There are tools to show the impact of routine, fresh activity and how small adjustments can make a huge difference. Tara Parker-Pope's genius is for exploring the science behind the big issues that affect our lives every day and translating that science into advice that we can use every day.
For Better is the definitive guide to the most profound relationship of our lives.
©2010 Tara Parker-Pope (P)2010 HighBridge CompanyListeners also enjoyed...
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Editorial reviews
Like some of the best nonfiction books out there, Tara Parker-Pope’s latest, For Better: The Science of a Good Marriage, sprung from a personal place. After her 17-year union ended in divorce, the former health columnist couldn’t help but wonder if, had she been armed with more cold, hard facts before heading into marriage, she might have saved her own. "I knew where to look for answers about heart disease, diabetes, allergies, and numerous other health issues," she writes, "and I wanted the same objective, evidence-based advice about my marriage."
And with that as her jumping-off point, Parker-Pope, who also writes the popular “Well” blog for The New York Times, digs deep to uncover what makes a good marriage, well, good. (Hints: Have sex often, even when you don’t feel like it; use "we" more than "I" during arguments; and don’t roll your eyes at your partner, ever.) Spotlighting the oft-overlooked work of relationship researchers, For Better offers practical advice gleaned from studies on sex, money, parenting, gender roles and even housework.
Competently narrating is Cassandra Campbell. Of course, For Better is, at heart, a science tome, so Campbell isn’t provided many opportunities to get all fancy with her cadence. And having someone verbalize the book’s self-help quizzes of which there are more than a dozen designed to help you assess the state of your own marriage seems especially futile. Still, Parker-Pope and, by extension, Campbell, deliver a solid package: nine hours of thoroughly researched, eye-opening statistics presented in an easy, conversational style. Jaime Buerger
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More than a million couples can't be wrong! And with this updated edition of their award-winning book, Drs. Les and Leslie Parrott help you launch lifelong love like never before. This is more than an audiobook - it's an experience. Get ready for deeper intimacy with the best friend you'll ever have. Saving Your Marriage Before It Starts, in more than 15 languages, is the most widely used marriage prep tool in the world.
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basically just a long advertisement
- By J. Sullivan on 07-06-16
By: Les Parrott, and others
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Sex, Murder, and the Meaning of Life
- A Psychologist Investigates How Evolution, Cognition, and Complexity Are Revolutionizing Our View of Human Nature
- By: Douglas T. Kenrick
- Narrated by: Fred Stella
- Length: 7 hrs and 31 mins
- Unabridged
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Between what can be learned from evolutionary psychology and cognitive science a picture emerges. In Sex, Murder, and the Meaning of Life, social psychologist Douglas Kenrick fuses these two fields to create a coherent story of human nature. In his analysis, many ingrained, apparently irrational behaviors—one-night stands, prejudice, conspicuous consumption, even art and religious devotion—are quite explicable and (when desired) avoidable.
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Rather dated and self-aggrandizing
- By Laurie Frick on 07-21-11
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Men Chase, Women Choose
- The Neuroscience of Meeting, Dating, Losing Your Mind, and Finding True Love
- By: Dawn Maslar
- Narrated by: Suzanne Elise Freeman
- Length: 7 hrs and 4 mins
- Unabridged
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Men Chase, Women Choose is the first book to offer cutting-edge research that explains how the brain works when two people first meet, start to date, fall in love, and then move into real long-term love. Maslar's unique approach brings together the latest and most relevant neurological, physiological, and biochemical research on the science of love while incorporating stories and examples of composite characters based on participants of her popular classes and seminars.
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Disappointed
- By Kittenheels on 11-18-18
By: Dawn Maslar
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Post-Romantic Stress Disorder
- What to Do When the Honeymoon Is Over
- By: John Bradshaw
- Narrated by: Joe Barrett
- Length: 5 hrs and 17 mins
- Unabridged
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John Bradshaw is arguably the most accomplished and well-known leader alive today in the addictions field. He taught us about functional and dysfunctional families, showed us how shame could become toxic and poisonous to our core selves, and helped us understand and heal the wounded, vulnerable "inner child" conceived by, and thriving in, that environment. In Post-Romantic Stress Disorder (PRSD), Bradshaw gives readers a clear explanation of the difference between falling in love, lust, and true love.
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How do you own the world, how do you own disorder?
- By Derek G. on 01-13-17
By: John Bradshaw
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The Rational Animal
- How Evolution Made Us Smarter Than We Think
- By: Douglas T. Kenrick, Vladas Griskevicius
- Narrated by: Tim Andres Pabon
- Length: 8 hrs and 43 mins
- Unabridged
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Why do three out of four professional football players go bankrupt? How can illiterate jungle dwellers pass a test that tricks Harvard philosophers? And why do billionaires work so hard - only to give their hard-earned money away? When it comes to making decisions, the classic view is that humans are eminently rational. But growing evidence suggests instead that our choices are often irrational, biased, and occasionally even moronic. Which view is right - or is there another possibility?
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Good book
- By Justin on 02-17-17
By: Douglas T. Kenrick, and others
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All the Single Ladies
- Unmarried Women and the Rise of an Independent Nation
- By: Rebecca Traister
- Narrated by: Candace Thaxton, Rebecca Traister - introduction
- Length: 11 hrs and 39 mins
- Unabridged
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In a provocative, groundbreaking work, National Magazine Award finalist Rebecca Traister, "the most brilliant voice on feminism in this country" (Anne Lamott), traces the history of unmarried women in America who, through social, political, and economic means, have radically shaped our nation.
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Excellent book, destroyed by narration
- By Theresa Holleran on 03-06-16
By: Rebecca Traister
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I Love You, but I'm Not in Love with You
- Seven Steps to Saving Your Relationship
- By: Andrew G. Marshall
- Narrated by: Andrew G. Marshall
- Length: 8 hrs and 18 mins
- Unabridged
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In I Love You, but I'm Not in Love with You - a real-life relationship guide from couples' counselor Andrew G. Marshall - partners and individuals who have "fallen out of love" or want to rekindle the love that once was will learn how to use Marshall 's program with impressive results. This is a much-needed book to help men and women of all ages in any type of committed romantic relationship to truly understand love and to point out the everyday habits that undermine growing together.
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If you feel stuck in a relationship, this book is a MUST!
- By Christopher on 05-09-19
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Generation Me
- Why Today's Young Americans Are More Confident, Assertive, Entitled - and More Miserable Than Ever Before
- By: Jean M. Twenge PhD
- Narrated by: Randye Kaye
- Length: 12 hrs and 20 mins
- Unabridged
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In this provocative new book, psychologist and social commentator Dr. Jean Twenge documents the self-focus of what she calls "Generation Me" - people born in the 1970s, 1980s, and 1990s. Dr. Twenge explores why her generation is tolerant, confident, open-minded, and ambitious but also cynical, depressed, lonely, and anxious. Dr. Twenge reveals how profoundly different today's young adults are - and makes controversial predictions about what the future holds for them and society as a whole.
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I mostly agree
- By David Hill on 05-25-20
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How to Improve Your Marriage Without Talking About It
- By: Patricia Love, Steven Stosny
- Narrated by: Laural Merlington
- Length: 6 hrs and 49 mins
- Unabridged
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Men are right. The "relationship talk" does not help. Dr. Patricia Love’s and Dr. Steven Stosny’s How to Improve Your Marriage Without Talking About It reveals the stunning truth about marital happiness: Love is not about better communication. It's about connection.
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Must read if your on the verge of loosing it all!
- By Chris on 07-19-15
By: Patricia Love, and others
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Relationship Breakthrough
- How to Create Outstanding Relationships in Every Area of Your Life
- By: Cloe Madanes, Anthony Robbins
- Narrated by: Aimee Jolson
- Length: 6 hrs and 32 mins
- Unabridged
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Everyone faces the challenges of making relationships work. Whether with spouses, family members, friends, lovers, or colleagues, relationships have the power to make one feel happy, frustrated, or miserable. In Relationship Breakthrough, Cloe Madanes - an expert in creating healing, empowering relationships - gives listeners vital tools to transform their relationships and their lives. Madanes's cutting-edge methods produce real results and create rewarding, sustainable relationships.
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Disappointed
- By Dee on 01-10-16
By: Cloe Madanes, and others
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Why Mars and Venus Collide
- Understanding How Men and Women Cope Differently with Stress
- By: John Gray
- Narrated by: John Gray
- Length: 6 hrs and 57 mins
- Unabridged
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Once upon a time, Martians and Venusians functioned in separate worlds. But in today's hectic and career-oriented environment, relationships have become a lot more complicated, and men and women are experiencing unprecedented levels of stress. To add to the increasing tension, most men and women are also completely unaware that they are actually hardwired to react differently to the stress.
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Very insightful & evokative for introspection
- By Amazon Customer on 02-04-12
By: John Gray
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Getting to 50/50
- How Working Parents Can Have It All by Sharing It All - and Why It’s Good for Your Marriage, Your Career, Your Kids, and You
- By: Sharon Meers, Joanna Strober
- Narrated by: Marguerite Gavin
- Length: 10 hrs and 16 mins
- Unabridged
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Sharon Meers and Joanna Strober are professionals, wives, and mothers. They understand the challenges and rewards of two-career households. They also know that families thrive not in spite of working mothers but because of them. You can have a great career, a great marriage, and be a great mother. The key is tapping into your best resource and most powerful ally - the man you married.
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Great overall, but a bit offensive...
- By Tristan Matthews on 01-09-15
By: Sharon Meers, and others
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Commit to Win
- How to Harness the Four Elements of Commitment to Reach Your Goals
- By: Heidi Reeder PhD
- Narrated by: Heidi Reeder PhD
- Length: 5 hrs and 55 mins
- Unabridged
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What do you need besides motivation and willpower? In Commit to Win, Heidi Reeder, PhD, unpacks over forty years of research by psychologists and economists to show that the key to reaching any goal, whether it’s to hit the gym more often or to finally quit that dead-end job, isn’t motivation, willpower, or determination. It’s commitment. Busting the myths most of us believe about commitment, Reeder shows that it all comes down to four variables.
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Practical, but misses passion
- By ANDRÉ on 11-07-14
By: Heidi Reeder PhD
What listeners say about For Better
Average customer ratingsReviews - Please select the tabs below to change the source of reviews.
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Overall
- Morgan
- 10-14-10
Fascinating Read / Good Narrator
I bought this book because I liked the idea of getting advice based on facts / statistics. I was worried it might get boring, but I like to know authors are coming to conclusions based on scientific study or some kind of data. But I had no reason to worry because this book was fascinating! It offered good common sense advice about how to maintain a marriage or any committed relationship in a straight forward but not in a cheesy self-help way. Definitely recommended.
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3 people found this helpful
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- Melissa Holewinski
- 08-27-10
Good Food For Thought
The author covers an extremely complex subject and presents a great deal of scientific study, but this does not read like a text book. The narrator's voice is calm and soothing without being dull. The book contains a number of quizzes, which are read by the narrator who then interprets the results. I believe these would be more effective in printed form. This is merely a function of the audio format and not a criticism of the book itself. Overall, it was a very thought provoking read. I would recommend it for any married person or one who is contemplating marriage.
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15 people found this helpful
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Overall
- Carla
- 07-15-11
Entertaining, scientific look at marriage
I found this to be a very entertaining look at marriage and relationship studies. The quizzes were fun, but if you are looking for a book that's main focus is quizzes and exercises I don't think this is the one for you. If you are looking to understand more about what scientific study has shown to be factors in a good marriage this is a great book. A great book for a curious mind.
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- JOHN
- 12-04-20
I'm not even married, but this is a great book
For Better was recommended to me by my brother, who is in a long-term relationship and considering proposing. Myself, I am recently out of a long-term relationship and mulling what went wrong. This is a fascinating read if you care about intimate relationships and what makes them tick.
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- Marie
- 11-14-10
Probably better for print
I do appreciate this book as part of my premarital reading, but there are tests and lots of numbers in this book that make me believe a print copy would be better in order to be more useful.
I did find myself zoning out at various points.
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3 people found this helpful
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- Kamrin Klauschie
- 10-04-18
A statistical dive into the aspects of marriage
I enjoyed the unique statistical perspective on marriage in this book. Unlike many marriage books that merely tell you how to have a good marriage, this book shares a plethora of statistics around various aspects of marriage, helping you understand odds and determine what areas to focus on. Although I felt some of the conclusions made were not the most sound and sometimes biased by the author's perspectives and personal experiences, I finished this book feeling informed and more knowledgable.
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- LUCY
- 09-21-10
for better and for boredom
i was expecting a more dramatic approach to this book. where couple were ask question and they would answer them . this books was base on statistic and studies it was kind of boring.
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1 person found this helpful
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- Sharon Brucato
- 07-15-20
Inane
Reviews from professional writers overhyped this book. It does not live up to its promise. The data provided is already well known.
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Overall
- B. Bartness
- 12-02-10
Information Overload
There was so many different risk factors, personality traits, conflict styles, etc, presented in this book it becomes impossible to keep track of everything. I believe there are 19 total "For Better" quizzes. I was excited and eager about the first one; they became boring and mind numbing by the last one.
I did learn some interesting things along the way (my favorite was that hand holding reduces stress for women). By the end there was just too many topics covered that I lost concentration and interest. It was one of the few books I wanted to just reach the end.
I am still not sure how one would apply all the information. Should you try to score high on all 19 quizzes? Which quizzes are most important?
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3 people found this helpful