All the Single Ladies
Unmarried Women and the Rise of an Independent Nation
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Narrated by:
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Candace Thaxton
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Rebecca Traister - introduction
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By:
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Rebecca Traister
About this listen
In a provocative, groundbreaking work, National Magazine Award finalist Rebecca Traister, "the most brilliant voice on feminism in this country" (Anne Lamott), traces the history of unmarried women in America who, through social, political, and economic means, have radically shaped our nation.
For legions of women, living single isn't news; it's life. In 2009, the award-winning journalist Rebecca Traister started All the Single Ladies - a book she thought would be a work of contemporary journalism - about the 21st-century phenomenon of the American single woman. It was the year the proportion of American women who were married dropped below 50 percent, and the median age of first marriages, which had remained between 20 and 22 years old for nearly a century (1890-1980), had risen dramatically to 27.
But over the course of her vast research and more than 100 interviews with academics, social scientists, and prominent single women, Traister discovered a startling truth: The phenomenon of the single woman in America is not a new one. And historically, when women were given options beyond early heterosexual marriage, the results were massive social change - temperance, abolition, secondary education, and more. Today, only 20 percent of Americans are wed by age 29, compared to nearly 60 percent in 1960. The Population Reference Bureau calls it a "dramatic reversal".
All the Single Ladies is a remarkable portrait of contemporary American life and how we got here, through the lens of the single American woman. Covering class, race, and sexual orientation and filled with vivid anecdotes from fascinating contemporary and historical figures, All the Single Ladies is destined to be a classic work of social history and journalism. Exhaustively researched, brilliantly balanced, and told with Traister's signature wit and insight, this book should be shelved alongside Gail Collins' When Everything Changed.
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Story
In this provocative new book, psychologist and social commentator Dr. Jean Twenge documents the self-focus of what she calls "Generation Me" - people born in the 1970s, 1980s, and 1990s. Dr. Twenge explores why her generation is tolerant, confident, open-minded, and ambitious but also cynical, depressed, lonely, and anxious. Dr. Twenge reveals how profoundly different today's young adults are - and makes controversial predictions about what the future holds for them and society as a whole.
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I mostly agree
- By David Hill on 05-25-20
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Marriage, a History
- How Love Conquered Marriage
- By: Stephanie Coontz
- Narrated by: Callie Beaulieu
- Length: 15 hrs and 32 mins
- Unabridged
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In Marriage, a History, historian and marriage expert Stephanie Coontz takes listeners from the marital intrigues of ancient Babylon to the torments of Victorian lovers to demonstrate how recent the idea of marrying for love is - and how absurd it would have seemed to most of our ancestors. It was when marriage moved into the emotional sphere in the 19th century, she argues, that it suffered as an institution just as it began to thrive as a personal relationship.
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Marriage from a secular feminist's perspective
- By Timothy Hanline on 12-23-19
By: Stephanie Coontz
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When Everything Changed
- The Amazing Journey of American Women from 1960 to the Present
- By: Gail Collins
- Narrated by: Christina Moore
- Length: 15 hrs
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Overall
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Performance
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An enthralling blend of oral history and Gail Collins' keen research, this definitive look at 50 years of feminist progress shimmers with the amusing, down-to-earth liberal tone that is this New York Times columnist's trademark.
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The book I have been waiting for!
- By A Teacher on 09-10-10
By: Gail Collins
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Men on Strike
- Why Men Are Boycotting Marriage, Fatherhood, and the American Dream - and Why It Matters
- By: Helen Smith PhD
- Narrated by: Susan Boyce
- Length: 5 hrs and 15 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall
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Performance
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Story
American society has become anti-male. Men are sensing the backlash and are responding. They're dropping out of college, leaving the workforce, and avoiding marriage and fatherhood at alarming rates. The trend is so pronounced that a number of books have been written about this man-child phenomenon, concluding that men have taken a vacation from responsibility. But why should men participate in a system that seems to be increasingly stacked against them?
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Finally, someone said it!
- By Stephen Reid Kidd on 11-07-17
By: Helen Smith PhD
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All the Rage
- Mothers, Fathers, and the Myth of Equal Partnership
- By: Darcy Lockman
- Narrated by: Abby Craden
- Length: 8 hrs and 53 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall
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Performance
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Story
The inequity of domestic life is one of the most profound and perplexing conundrums of our time. In an era of seemingly unprecedented feminist activism, enlightenment, and change, data shows that one area of gender inequality stubbornly remains: the unequal amount of parental work that falls on women, no matter their class or professional status.
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Must read for men
- By Brooks Rainey Pearson on 06-12-19
By: Darcy Lockman
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Angry White Men
- American Masculinity at the End of an Era
- By: Michael Kimmel
- Narrated by: Aaron Williamson
- Length: 12 hrs and 46 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall
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Performance
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One of the enduring legacies of the 2012 Presidential campaign was the demise of the white American male voter as a dominant force in the political landscape. On election night, after Obama was announced the winner, a distressed Bill O'Reilly lamented that he didn't live in "a traditional America anymore". He was joined by others who bellowed their grief on the talk radio airwaves, the traditional redoubt of angry white men. Why were they so angry?
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Interesting book; Wrong reader
- By Carolina A. Miranda on 05-02-18
By: Michael Kimmel
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The Feminine Mistake
- By: Leslie Bennetts
- Narrated by: Leslie Bennetts
- Length: 6 hrs and 29 mins
- Abridged
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Women are constantly being told that it's simply too difficult to balance work and family, so if they don't really "have to" work, it's better for their families if they stay home. Not only is this untrue, Leslie Bennetts says, but the arguments in favor of stay-at-home motherhood fail to consider the surprising benefits of work and the unexpected toll of giving it up. It's time, she says, to get the message across: combining work and family really is the best choice for most women.
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couldn't get into it.
- By diana prince on 09-21-15
By: Leslie Bennetts
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One and Only
- The Freedom of Having an Only Child, and the Joy of Being One
- By: Lauren Sandler
- Narrated by: Lauren Sandler
- Length: 6 hrs and 14 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall
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Performance
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Story
Journalist Lauren Sandler is an only child and the mother of one. After investigating what only children are really like and whether stopping at one child is an answer to reconciling motherhood and modernity, she learned a lot about herself - and a lot about our culture's assumptions. In this heartfelt work, Sandler legitimizes a discussion about the larger societal costs of having more than one.
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Data Driven
- By Meghan B on 01-11-22
By: Lauren Sandler
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It Was All a Dream
- A New Generation Confronts the Broken Promise to Black America
- By: Reniqua Allen
- Narrated by: Shayna Small
- Length: 12 hrs and 17 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall
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Performance
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Reniqua Allen tells the stories of Black millennials searching for a better future in spite of racist policies that have closed off traditional versions of success. Many watched their parents and grandparents play by the rules, only to sink deeper and deeper into debt. They witnessed their elders fight to escape cycles of oppression for more promising prospects, largely to no avail. Today, in this post-Obama era, they face a critical turning point. Interweaving her own experience, Allen shares surprising stories of hope and ingenuity.
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Great statistics and facts
- By Eve on 05-18-19
By: Reniqua Allen
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Bad Sex
- Truth, Pleasure, and an Unfinished Revolution
- By: Nona Willis Aronowitz
- Narrated by: Nona Willis Aronowitz
- Length: 9 hrs and 44 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall
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Performance
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Story
At thirty-two years old, everything in Nona Willis Aronowitz’s life, and in America, was in disarray. Her marriage was falling apart. Her nuclear family was slipping away. Her heart and libido were both in overdrive. Embroiled in an era of fear, reckoning, and reimagining, her assumptions of what “sexual liberation” meant were suddenly up for debate.
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I was born in the 50s, sexually active in the mid 70s
- By Pixel on 08-22-22
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The Wife Drought
- By: Annabel Crabb
- Narrated by: Annabel Crabb
- Length: 7 hrs and 8 mins
- Unabridged
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Performance
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Story
'I need a wife'. It's a common joke among women juggling work and family, but it's no joke. Having a spouse who takes care of things at home is a godsend on the domestic front and an asset on the work front and is an advantage enjoyed by vastly more men than women. Full of candid and funny stories from politics and the media, The Wife Drought shares intriguing research about the attitudes pulsing beneath the surface of egalitarian Australia.
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A read for everyone
- By RubyH on 02-01-24
By: Annabel Crabb
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Coming Apart
- The State of White America, 1960–2010
- By: Charles Murray
- Narrated by: Traber Burns
- Length: 12 hrs and 24 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall
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Story
In Coming Apart, Charles Murray explores the formation of American classes that are different in kind from anything we have ever known, focusing on whites as a way of driving home the fact that the trends he describes do not break along lines of race or ethnicity.
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Brilliant & Flawed
- By Douglas C. Bates on 05-15-12
By: Charles Murray
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Selfish, Shallow, and Self-Absorbed
- Sixteen Writers on the Decision Not to Have Kids
- By: Meghan Daum
- Narrated by: Johnny Heller, Jo Anna Perrin
- Length: 7 hrs and 40 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall
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Performance
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Story
One of the main topics of cultural conversation during the last decade was the supposed "fertility crisis" and whether modern women could figure out a way to have it all - a successful, demanding career and the required 2.3 children - before their biological clocks stopped ticking. Now, however, conversation has turned to whether it's necessary to have it all (see Anne-Marie Slaughter) or, perhaps more controversial, whether children are really a requirement for a fulfilling life.
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Am I the only sane childfree woman in here?
- By J. Malouin on 09-29-15
By: Meghan Daum
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We congratulate ourselves when we resist the donut in the office breakroom. We celebrate our restraint when we hold back from sending an email in anger. We feel virtuous when we wake up at dawn to get a jump on the day. We put others’ needs ahead of our own and believe this makes us exemplary. In On Our Best Behavior, journalist Elise Loehnen explains that these impulses—often lauded as unselfish, distinctly feminine instincts—are actually ingrained in us by a culture that reaps the benefits, via an extraordinarily effective collection of mores known as the Seven Deadly Sins.
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Entitled
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In this bold and stylish critique, Cornell philosopher Kate Manne offers a radical new framework for understanding misogyny. Ranging widely across the culture, from Harvey Weinstein and the Brett Kavanaugh hearings to “Cat Person” and the political misfortunes of Elizabeth Warren, Manne’s book shows how privileged men’s sense of entitlement - to sex, yes, but more insidiously to admiration, care, bodily autonomy, knowledge, and power - is a pervasive social problem with often devastating consequences.
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New to the subject
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The Way We Never Were
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Leave It to Beaver was not a documentary, a man's home has never been his castle, the "male breadwinner marriage" is the least traditional family in history, and rape and sexual assault were far higher in the 1970s than they are today. In The Way We Never Were, acclaimed historian Stephanie Coontz examines two centuries of the American family, sweeping away misconceptions about the past that cloud current debates about domestic life. The 1950s do not present a workable model of how to conduct our personal lives today, Coontz argues.
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fantastic report on the dangers of nostalgia
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We Should All Be Feminists
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In this personal, eloquently-argued essay—adapted from the much-admired TEDx talk of the same name—Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie offers readers a unique definition of feminism for the twenty-first century. Drawing extensively on her own experiences and her deep understanding of the often masked realities of sexual politics, here is one remarkable author’s exploration of what it means to be a woman now—and an of-the-moment rallying cry for why we should all be feminists.
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compelling
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What listeners say about All the Single Ladies
Average customer ratingsReviews - Please select the tabs below to change the source of reviews.
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- Michelle L.
- 05-18-16
Thank you, thank you, thank you!
Thank you Rebecca Traister for this book! As a 40-something divorced mother of five, I have struggled to find my identity outside of my traditional marriage. This book feels like a roadmap or at least guideposts to how to be a woman at this phase of my life! I am also sharing what I am learning with my two adult daughters. It's empowering to have a modern compendium of excellent women to turn to in 2016!
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- Renee
- 05-19-18
Yes, Read It
Love the message, love the speaker's voice, love what I learned! Definitely going to use this knowledge to better the world.
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- Crystal D. Jones
- 03-22-16
Two Thumbs up to All the Single Ladies & Rebecca!!!
Loved the book! Had a lot of interesting research based facts! I especially enjoyed the interviews with real life women of various backgrounds & upbringings!!
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- Molly Bolster
- 09-08-16
Enjoyed the book
I enjoyed this book. I found it very eye opening but at a certain point it felt like the writer was just repeating herself and making the same point over and over again. Overall, I was thankful that she talked about all the options we have as women today. I'm not someone who is rushing to get married and start a family and this book made me feel better about that and that it's completely normal.
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- JJVW
- 01-08-22
Great performance
The reader was wonderfully alive and made the words jump off the page. Made me feel like someone was having a conversation with me. The content is great on its own, and read by the right person made it an excellent experience.
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- Elizabeth
- 03-03-16
At the top of my all-time favourites list
What made the experience of listening to All the Single Ladies the most enjoyable?
Traister writes charmingly and with a depth of knowledge on the various aspects of what it means to be single in both the U.S. and, to an extent, the larger world. In this one book, Traister cohesively brings together the inputs and outputs that make unmarried life desirable, challenging and (un)intentional, articulating how it all connects and the resulting implications.
If you could give All the Single Ladies a new subtitle, what would it be?
It already belongs to the subtitle it needs.
Any additional comments?
Beyond the remarkable execution, this book speaks to everything that is in me; it voices my hopes, fears, and the realities that inform the life that I've cultivated and have observed in the women that I most respect. Traister (and Candace Thaxton for her audio presentation of the material) has my deepest and hearty thanks.
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7 people found this helpful
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- Suzanne
- 03-27-18
Best book I’ve read so far this year!
I can’t stop talking about this book! I’ve been telling all my friends about it. It’s phenomenal! Go read it!
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- Dave Espionage
- 01-13-17
Information, Educational, and Without Apology
What was the most compelling aspect of this narrative?
The sheer detail and compelling nature of the stories and histories provided
What does Candace Thaxton and Rebecca Traister - introduction bring to the story that you wouldn’t experience if you just read the book?
Inflection in terms of irony and empathic moments are enunciated well and performed clearly even when the source material runs long in the wording or phrasing.
If you were to make a film of this book, what would the tag line be?
A not-so-secret society of single women integral to the fabric of America, and how they are more than what they are told to be.
Any additional comments?
Fantastic, sometimes hard to hear, very informative and helpful to know and hear options for improving the future.
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- S. Granger
- 08-23-18
A must read for all the single ladies
I love this book so much that I’ve sent it to two other family members(under 30). I am a 33 y.o southern woman, but knew the nuptials in the south were not for me, neither did I want a man with the same southern mentality (gender roles). This book has completely changed my perspective on relationships and marriage. It’s reaffirmed my no-fucks-given personality about patriarchal society’s idea of a “healthy” marriage.
Buy the book, thank me later and have sister circles for discussion.
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- Chantalle Ashford
- 03-10-16
Put Your Hands Up
This book is phenomenal and Rebecca Traister is a TRUE feminist. Not only does she throughly and thoughtful catalog the history and lives of single women in America, she makes sure that this book could represent a majority of women, even in small ways. I recommend this book to every feminist (that means men too!)!!!
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