Children Are From Heaven

Positive Parenting Skills for Raising Cooperative, Confident, and Compassionate Children

By: John Gray

Narrated by: John Gray

Length: 2 hrs and 18 mins

Publisher's summary

After years of experience leading communication workshops and honing his own parenting skills, John Gray has created a brilliantly original and effective system that he calls positive parenting, for children of all ages; from birth through the teenage years. Completing the notion that Men are from Mars, Women are from Venus, he adds and Children Are From Heaven.

Children Are From Heaven covers different skills of parenting to help improve communication, increase cooperation, and motivate your children. Central to this new approach are the five positive messages your children need to learn again and again.

• It's okay to be different.
• It's okay to make mistakes.
• It's okay to express negative emotions.
• It's okay to want more.
• It's okay to say no, but remember Mom and Dad are the bosses.

When these messages are put into practice, and John Gray shows you how, your children will develop the necessary skills for successful living: forgiveness of others and themselves, sharing, delayed gratification, self-esteem, patience, persistence, respect for others and themselves, cooperation, compassion, confidence, and the ability to be happy.

By applying the five messages and different skills of positive parenting, your children will recieve what they need to become more cooperative, confident, and compassionate children.

©1999 by John Gray (P)16 9; 1999 HarperCollins Publishers, Inc. All Rights Reserved. Harper Audio, a division of HarperCollins Publishers

Critic reviews

"The teaching genius of John Gray comes through....One of the best audio guides available on staying centered and effective as a parent." (AudioFile)

Good core, very repetitive

The core of this book is useful. It discusses ways to bring your children back under your control without resorting to threats or violence. It has already helped me to keep my focus when dealing with my son's temper trantrums.

At the core of the book is the idea that it is okay to resist, but mommy and daddy are right. During the resistance, whether your child wants to do something that you disallow, or you want him/her to do something, you must never lose your temper yourself. Rather you use the following 5 step process:

1. Ask politely, using "would you" and "please".
2. Listen, empathize (i.e. I understand that you are mad at me for making you do this, but...) then ask politely again.
3. Offer a reward.
4. Order (i.e. I want you do this this.) Don't get upset, repeat order four or five times.
5. Give him/her a timeout, equal to one minute for each year of age.

Do not make the timeout a punishment with threats, remain on the other side of the door, and do not make the child reflect upon it. Simply let the child cry or fuss. Afterwards do not show any hostility towards the child. After the timeout, the child will be back under your control. I have used this process a couple times and it seems to work.

Like his previous effort, Venus & Mars, this book is highly repetitive. In paper format this is unacceptable, because you can always go back and read the information again. In audible format this isn't such a problem, especially if you listen to this in the car where you are prone to missing a sentence here and there due to distractions.

good book

What did you like best about Children Are From Heaven? What did you like least?

helps with ideas about parenting, though I don't really share the author's perspective all the time.