Absolutely No Thoughts of Pounding During My Fun Day with This Kind T-Rex Because I'm Aromantic and Asexual and That's a Wonderfully Valid Way of Proving Love Is Real
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Narrated by:
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Georgia Bird
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By:
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Chuck Tingle
About this listen
Michelle has been tasked with watching her friend's dog, Lucky, over the weekend. It's a simple task, but when Lucky escapes, things get complicated. Fortunately, Michelle finds help in a kind T-Rex named Lara, who accompanies Michelle on her journey across town in search of this missing pup.
The quest brings these two into contact with all kinds of romantic tropes, from a bouquet of flowers, to a box of chocolates, to an evening at a gorgeous vineyard. Of course, none of that matters because Michelle is proudly aromantic and asexual, and soon enough she?s proving there are plenty of ways to find love, joy, passion and adventure without a shred of romantic love.
Now the walls of meta reality are breaking down in a firm reminder that aromantic adventurers prove love is real in important and powerful non-romantic ways!
This important tale is 4,500 words of blossoming platonic friendship between buds, including learning about each other, sharing a fun dinner with a box of chocolates as an appetizer, and riding a Ferris wheel at night without a shred of romance.
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By: Tim Bauerschmidt, and others
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Free Days with George
- Learning Life's Little Lessons from One Very Big Dog
- By: Colin Campbell
- Narrated by: Rudy Sanda
- Length: 6 hrs and 30 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall
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Performance
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Story
After Colin Campbell went on a short business trip abroad, he returned home to discover his wife of many years had moved out. No explanations. No second chances. She was gone and wasn't coming back. Shocked and heartbroken, Colin fell into a spiral of depression and loneliness. Soon after, a friend told Colin about a dog in need of rescue - a neglected, 140-pound Newfoundland Landseer, a breed renowned for its friendly nature and remarkable swimming abilities.
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Great
- By Diane Downs on 06-17-18
By: Colin Campbell
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A Dark and Stormy Murder
- Writer’s Apprentice Mystery Series, Book 1
- By: Julia Buckley
- Narrated by: Rebecca Mitchell
- Length: 7 hrs and 53 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall
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Performance
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Story
Lena London's literary dreams are coming true - as long as she can avoid any real - life villains.... Camilla Graham's best-selling suspense novels inspired Lena London to become a writer, so when she lands a job as Camilla's new assistant, she can't believe her luck. Not only will she help her idol craft an enchanting new mystery, she'll get to live rent-free in Camilla's gorgeous Victorian home in the quaint town of Blue Lake, Indiana.
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Human or computer reading?
- By Mountain Dancer on 11-06-18
By: Julia Buckley
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Run!
- 26.2 Stories of Blisters and Bliss
- By: Dean Karnazes
- Narrated by: Daniel May
- Length: 7 hrs and 16 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall
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Performance
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Story
In his follow-up to the best-selling Ultra-Marathon Man, world-renowned ultra marathoner Dean Karnazes chronicles his unbelievable exploits and explorations in gripping detail; Karnazes runs for days on end without rest, across some of the most exotic and inhospitable places on earth, including the Australian Outback, Antarctica, and the back alleys of New Jersey.
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Great stories. Horrible narrator.
- By Alberto Medellin on 08-20-15
By: Dean Karnazes
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Alaskan Dawn
- By: Edie Claire
- Narrated by: Coleen Marlo
- Length: 9 hrs and 42 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall
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Performance
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Story
Haley knew that carrying her twin sister's baby would be a sacrifice. She just didn't know how great. Pregnant, overworked, and driven to the end of her rope by the neediness of the sister and widowed mother who depend on her, a high-powered young attorney seeks refuge with a week's vacation on the Alaskan coast.
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Enjoyed listening
- By Connie Correll on 05-12-16
By: Edie Claire
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The Secret Letters of the Monk Who Sold His Ferrari
- By: Robin Sharma
- Narrated by: Adam Verner
- Length: 6 hrs and 39 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall
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Performance
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Story
After a bizarre encounter with his lost cousin, Jonathan Landry is compelled to travel across the planet to retrieve letters and mementos that carry the extraordinary secrets that Julian discovered throughout his life. On a remarkable journey that includes visits to the sensual tango halls of Buenos Aires, the haunting catacombs of Paris, the gleaming towers of Shanghai and the mystical deserts of Sedona, The Secret Letters of The Monk Who Sold His Ferrari reveals astounding insights on reclaiming your personal power, being true to yourself, and fearlessly living your dreams.
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Very Enlightening
- By Jocelyne Ramos on 04-23-19
By: Robin Sharma
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Paradise Island
- A Sam and Colby Story
- By: Sam Golbach, Colby Brock, Gaby Triana
- Narrated by: Josh Hurley, Jason Keller
- Length: 8 hrs and 13 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall
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Performance
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Story
When YouTube ghost hunters Sam and Colby head to Kauai for an annual bro trip with two childhood buddies, they’re dying for a break from paranormal investigations - instead, they find themselves at the center of their most horrifying mystery yet.
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Crazy Story!
- By Katie Coston on 04-23-21
By: Sam Golbach, and others
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The Royals Next Door
- By: Karina Halle
- Narrated by: Cassandra York
- Length: 9 hrs and 35 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall
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Performance
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Story
Piper Evans: elementary school teacher by day - avid romance reader and anonymous podcaster by night. She has a quiet, reclusive life, taking care of her mother, who lives with mental illness, avoiding her regrettable ex, who bartends in town, and trying to make inroads in the tight-knit island community that still sees her, five years in, as an outsider. And she's happy with how things are - really - until British royals rent the property next to hers and their brooding bodyguard decides she's a security threat.
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Not for me.
- By Monika Winters on 02-01-22
By: Karina Halle
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Misha knows that chasing success in Hollywood can be hell. But finally, after years of trying to make it, his big moment is here: an Oscar nomination. And the executives at the studio for his long-running streaming series know just the thing to kick his career to the next level: kill off the gay characters, "for the algorithm," in the upcoming season finale.
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Not Pounded by Bi Erasure Because My Current Hetero-Presenting Relationship Does Not Invalidate My Queerness
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Selena is having a weird day. It starts off simple enough, with a few household items disappearing mysteriously, but things quickly turn heartbreaking when Selena’s office excludes her from a queer team-building workshop. According to Selena’s new boss, her current hetero-presenting relationship invalidates her bisexuality. Now Selena is on a mission to shake up the system and prove her new boss wrong, but as things continue to disappear around her, she realizes there’s more going than meets the eye.
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Please Don't Stop
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Pounded in the Butt by My Own Butt
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Kirk is a scientific researcher on the leading edge of cloning technology, but his team has reached a standstill. In an effort to stabilize rapid clone growth, researchers have been taking DNA from various parts of their bodies and combining it with small amounts of animal DNA. But when the scientists combine samples from Kirk's butt, brain, and a hawk, the resulting effect is a handsome, living ass who immediately sweeps Kirk off of his feet over a candlelit dinner for two.
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Huh.
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Just Kind of Ignoring This Sad Lonesome T-Rex Who Is Screaming "Debate Me" from His Folding Chair
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Jane is hoping to enjoy a nice dinner with her friend Brenna, but as soon as the night begins a conflict arises. Near the restaurant is a sad, lonesome T-Rex with a sign that says “debate me” rambling on and on about everything from "cancel culture" to “woke Stars War”. Fortunately, Jane and Brenna find the perfect solution to this strange dinosaur: They just ignore him. Can they maintain this self-imposed distance from the T-Rex who can’t stop proclaiming facts are better than feelings in this no sex tingler? The answer is yes, because this T-Rex is horrible.
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Life changer
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My Pool Gets Me Wet in a Completely Platonic Way and Now We Are Close Friends
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A heatwave in Southern California is bad news, and when Amanda’s air conditioning unit breaks down, things quickly go from bad to worse. It’ll take a full day to repair, sending Amanda on a desperate mission to keep cool.
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Life changing
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Important themes, excellent delivery
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It’s Valentine’s Day, and Megan has taken this opportunity to spill her feelings to her friend Alice in a very intimate card. She’s nervous, but fortunately it appears Alice could make the same romantic admission first. There are two candy hearts held within Alice’s envelope, each one of them featuring a startlingly explicit phrase. But is this a message from Alice, or from the candies themselves? The truth is quickly revealed when these sentient bisexual treats reveal their true desires.
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Please Don't Stop
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Huh.
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Jane is hoping to enjoy a nice dinner with her friend Brenna, but as soon as the night begins a conflict arises. Near the restaurant is a sad, lonesome T-Rex with a sign that says “debate me” rambling on and on about everything from "cancel culture" to “woke Stars War”. Fortunately, Jane and Brenna find the perfect solution to this strange dinosaur: They just ignore him. Can they maintain this self-imposed distance from the T-Rex who can’t stop proclaiming facts are better than feelings in this no sex tingler? The answer is yes, because this T-Rex is horrible.
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Brilliant
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Pounded in the Butt by My Book "Pounded in the Butt by My Book 'Pounded in the Butt by My Book "Pounded in the Butt by My Own Butt"'"
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Lord Gibbok is facing a serious dilemma. On one hand, he has a battle at dawn against the powerful wizard book, and on the other, the warrior has realized that he's nothing more than a fictional character in a gay erotica short. Hoping to cease this endless loop of reincarnation as characters within the Tingleverse, Lord Gibbok tracks down the author himself, Dr. Chuck Tingle, who makes him a deal.
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Camp Damascus
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Welcome to Neverton, Montana: home to a God-fearing community with a heart of gold. Nestled high up in the mountains is Camp Damascus, the self-proclaimed “most effective” gay conversion camp in the country. Here, a life free from sin awaits. But the secret behind that success is anything but holy. And they’ll scare you straight to hell.
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A Horror That Hits Home
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I'm Gay for My Living Billionaire Jet Plane
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When Alex boards a red-eye flight from New York to Los Angeles, he expects nothing more than another boring business trip. Little does Alex know that the plane itself will soon lead him on a life changing journey of erotic, gay passion. After learning about the plane's side business as a blackjack card counter, Alex agrees to meet the billionaire aircraft at his luxurious Beverly Hills mansion. But when things start to heat up by the pool, Alex is taught a lesson in more than just counting cards.
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So bad
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By: Chuck Tingle
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President Domald Loch Ness Tromp Pounds America's Butt
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Pibbles Pooch is a young, hotshot journalist with Bowling Bones magazine, who's just started his week on the presidential campaign trail with the notorious billionaire, Domald Tromp. Soon enough, things are going from bad to worse when Pibbles receives some top secret information about the real Domald Tromp, a man who may or may not actually be the Loch Ness Monster, and who may or may not be craving a lustful encounter within Pibbles' tight butthole.
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A bittersweet tale
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My Billionaire Triceratops Craves Gay Ass
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Jeremy was never quite sure about his feelings for Oliver, his gay pet dinosaur, until Oliver scores big and leaves home to pursue his dreams of being a dancer. Years later, the two of them reconnect for dinner in New York City, and realize that there may have been more to their relationship besides prehistoric pet and master. Now a wealthy socialite, Oliver the triceratops is willing to take another chance on Jeremy, and soon the two find themselves locked in a passionate evening of gay human-dino love.
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WTF did I just listen to?
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By: Chuck Tingle
What listeners say about Absolutely No Thoughts of Pounding During My Fun Day with This Kind T-Rex Because I'm Aromantic and Asexual and That's a Wonderfully Valid Way of Proving Love Is Real
Average customer ratingsReviews - Please select the tabs below to change the source of reviews.
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- Rachel
- 04-09-23
A wonderfully wacky aromantic read
it's so rare to find stories without romance, let alone with an explicitly aroace protagonist. that's the cherry on a fun, heartwarming, affirming sundae!
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