The Tome of Bill Series: Books 1-4

By: Rick Gualtieri

Narrated by: Christopher John Fetherolf

There are reasons we fear the night. He's not one of them.

This omnibus contains the first four books of the best-selling Tome of Bill urban fantasy series.

Recently turned vampire Bill Ryder is having a hard time taking this supernatural shit seriously. Too bad the ancient horrors lurking in the shadows don’t particularly like his attitude. Now, he’s got a choice: step up and face his destiny, or get trampled into dust. Needless to say, Bill’s death just made his life a hell of a lot more interesting.

Includes:

Bill the Vampire (Book one)
Bill Ryder was a dateless geek until he met a girl to die for. So he did. Too bad he’s still at the bottom of the food chain, fangs or not.

Scary Dead Things (Book two)
One of the most powerful vampires on Earth wants Bill Ryder’s head. A pint-sized princess wants the rest of him. It’s not clear which fate is worse.

The Mourning Woods (Book three)
A war is brewing between the vampires and sasquatches, ancient enemies since the dawn of time. If it can't be stopped, all of humanity's darkest nightmares will be unleashed to wreak havoc.

Holier than Thou (Book four)
On the eve of war, The Icon—legendary enemy of the vampire race—has arisen. There's just one small catch: Bill’s in love with her. Panic is about to break out within the ranks of the undead, and he’s caught smack dab in the middle of it.

Join Bill in these side-splitting tales of myths, monsters, and foul-mouthed mayhem. If you enjoy The Dresden Files, The Nate Temple Series, or The Montague & Strong Case Files, then you're in for a bloody good time with this vampire comedy.

©2015 Rick Gualtieri (P)2015 Rick Gualtieri

buckle up and put away butthurts

great punny funny story, about a poor schlub doing his best just to exist. then he gets bit. then it comes with some special side effects that puts him in everybody's crosshairs. little corny, lot of innuendo, an absolute load of what the dorky little perv is thinking at the best and worst of times. all in all, I have been locked in and it's a great mind musher. no big massive plot line that is strict and defined, just life and times of a geek with superpowers and a razor whit. did I mention his Dungeon Master friend likes cutting him up? for science? how about a poor defenseless cat exploding due to house-sitting munchies? only issue that distracted me from the insanity driven peyote trip this story is, was sometimes the narrator would slip up and immediately re-record a line. or between chapters his voice would be louder or softer. at first I though it was my phone being strange and rewinding or changing the volume. but that fell slightly to the edit. either way, great story, will continue to listen.

Phenomenal series

I absolutely love the Series! the narration, writing style, plot. Characters and pacing are absolutely perfect. I definitely recommend this book.

Like a gaming session with your buds

I swear some of these characters are actually based on my friends. The sarcastic witty banter and remarks reminds me of the old days gaming and bbqing with my buds. Been a great series so far and I find myself laughing out loud quite a bit. If you have the kind of friends that constantly bust on each other and prank you when they can, this is the book series for you. So many odd situations that are just laugh out loud awkward that at some spots I had to rewind just because I was laughing to hard. Definitely worth the read or listen!!!

I keep coming back

I have listened to these first 4 books so many times but I keep getting busy I finally finished them and they are so good

Bill for life

What can I say I wasn’t expecting this!! Bill and company have me dying of laughter. It’s just like being thrust into a corner and all you do is laugh about what’s next

If you are older than 17 or a woman, don’t bother!

Not one to waste an Audible purchase, I TRIED listening to this childish drivel. Should have taken heed to some of the not so favorable reviews. Isn’t even good background noise to fall asleep to.

Being a grown woman, I did not appreciate the fratboy immaturity & sexist tones of this book.
IMO, the writer has issues in crafting likable, realistic, adult characters and should have written the primaries as teens.

Disappointing

This is the type of series that makes you want to scream at why the MC is so dumb. First he is constantly getting dumped on by literally everyone. Two he never learns from experience.Three he is told he has potential but never try’s to learn about his abilities or get stronger in anyway. This whole series is just disappointing

Incel nerd MC

I am going to paraphrase a few paragraphs and if you like them, you will likely like the book. If you do not you will not likely like the book.

Bill the vampire: I couldn't do it! I couldn't bite the man, not because I dont want to kill someone but because it would be gay to bite a man. I could if it was a hot chick though, no wait that would be a waste. I could bite a fat chick.