상처주는 것과의 이별 [Parting with What Hurts]
불편한 감정 뒤에 숨어버린 진짜 나를 만나다 [Meet the Real Me Hidden Behind Uncomfortable Emotions]
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Narrated by:
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문지영
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By:
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손정연
About this listen
"알면서도 또 상처받고 말았어"
당당해지고 싶은 마음에게 보내는 심리 처방전
사랑하는 사람에게 받은 상처 때문에 새로운 관계 맺기를 두려워하는 사람, 직장 상사의 비난과 지적질에 자신감을 잃은 사람, 부모님의 끊임없는 부부싸움에 영향을 받아 타인을 믿지 못하는 사람, 친구의 거절로 인해 인간관계가 조심스러워진 사람, 주변 사람들에게 무시받은 상처 때문에 공격적으로 타인을 대하는 사람…. 우리는 누구나 상처를 받고 상처를 입히며 살아간다. 어린 시절부터 지속된 트라우마부터 인간관계에서 받게 되는 크고 작은 상처까지, 그 종류와 범위는 헤아릴 수 없을 정도다. 하지만 아픔과 상처를 대하는 방식이 모두가 동일한 것은 아니다. 어떤 사람은 그때그때 상처를 잘 정리하고 자신을 들여다보는 계기로 삼아 '성숙한 나'로 나아가지만, 어떤 사람은 상처를 끌어안고 감정적으로 대응하다가 더 큰 상처를 만들어내기도 한다. 그래서 우리는 상처를 잘 정리하는 법을 알 필요가 있다. 지금 내가 받는 상처로 인해 자존감을 잃고 존재 가치를 의심하지 않도록, 또 불편한 감정들을 끌어안고 인간관계 때문에 흔들리며 아파하지 않도록, 심리학이 전하는 따뜻한 상처 정리법을 만나보자.
목차
프롤로그
Part 1 도대체 왜 이러는 걸까? : 상처 주고 상처받는 사람들
- 그래서 하고 싶은 말이 뭔데요?
- 그저 잘해주고 싶었을 뿐인데
- 순간적으로 올라오는 감정이 문제야
- 도무지 믿을 수가 없어서
Part 2 허기진 내 마음이 너에게 닿기를
- 자존심은 지킬 수 있었지
- 도망치고 싶은 시간, 밤 9시
- 똑같은 패턴이 관계 속에서 반복될 때
- 이건 분명한 저 사람 잘못인데, 내가 왜
- 너무 잘나서 큰일이네요
- 가장 상처를 주는 사람이 엄마라니
- 감정의 기억을 바꿔보기로 했다
Part 3 혼자서 꾹꾹 눌러 담은 마음에게
- 혹시나 남들 눈에 이상해 보일까 봐
- 자꾸만 부정적으로 생각하게 되는 이유
- 정말 그게 당연한 건가요?
- 이유 없는 불안이 내 안에 가득할 때
- 어느 날, 나를 찾아온 죄책감
- 한 번도 위로해준 적 없는 마음
- 모든 상실은 똑같이 중요하다
Part 4 상처의 집을 비우는 다섯 가지 열쇠
- 첫 번째 열쇠_녹슨 감정 다루기
- 두 번째 열쇠_나와의 거리 두기
- 세 번째 열쇠_공감 더하기
- 네 번째 열쇠_기억의 맥락 바꾸기
- 다섯 번째 열쇠_내려놓기
저자: 손정연
"당신의 마음은 안녕한가요?" 뒤돌아볼 겨를도 없이 치열한 세상을 사는 당신에게 마음의 안부를 묻는 사람, 괜찮지 않아도 된다고 등을 토닥여주는 사람, 당신은 존재 자체만으로도 빛이 난다고 응원해주는 사람, 셀 수 없이 많은 당신의 하루를 지지해줄 사람, 그런 사람이길 꿈꾸며 수많은 이들에게 마음 처방전을 전하는 심리 상담 전문가이다. 현재 소스토리 마음상담코칭 대표이며, 법무부 교정위원과 동부구치소 인성위원으로 활동하고 있다. 2012년부터 무료 감성 치유 모임 '심리야살롱'을 주최하며 소외된 사람들이 고된 삶 속에서 자가 치유를 할 수 있도록 적정 심리 상담을 진행하고 있다. 또한 치유의 글 읽기 집단 상담 프로그램인 '32일의 위로'를 운영하며, 문학과 예술이 주는 치유의 힘을 통해 이 세상에서 경험할 수 없는 따뜻한 위로를 전하고자 끊임없이 노력 중이다.
Please note: This audiobook is in Korean.
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