Emotional Labor

The Invisible Work Shaping Our Lives and How to Claim Our Power

By: Rose Hackman

Narrated by: Rose Hackman

This program is read by the author.

For fans of Fair Play by Eve Rodsky and Burnout by Emily Nagoski and Amelia Nagoski comes a scathing, deeply researched foray into the invisible, uncompensated work women perform every day.

We’re tired.

A stranger insists you “smile more,” even as you navigate a high-stress environment or grating commute. A mother is expected to oversee every last detail of domestic life. A nurse works on the front line, worried about her own health, but has to put on a brave face for her patients. A young professional is denied promotion for being deemed abrasive instead of placating her boss. Nearly every day, we find ourselves forced to edit our emotions to accommodate and elevate the emotions of others. Too many of us are asked to perform this exhausting, draining work at no extra cost, especially if we’re women or people of color.

Emotional labor is essential to our society and economy, but it’s so often invisible. In this groundbreaking, journalistic deep dive, Rose Hackman shares the stories of hundreds of women, tracing the history of this kind of work and exposing common manifestations of the phenomenon. But Hackman doesn’t simply diagnose a problem—she empowers us to combat this insidious force and forge pathways for radical evolution, justice, and change.

Drawing on years of research and hundreds of interviews, you’ll learn:

· How emotional labor pervades our workplaces, from the bustling food service industry to the halls of corporate America

· How race, gender, and class unequally shape the load we carry

· Strategies for leveling the imbalances that contaminate our relationships, social circles, and households

· Empowering tools to stop anyone from gaslighting you into thinking the work you are doing is not real work

Emotional labor is real, but it no longer has to be our burden alone. By recognizing its value and insisting on its shared responsibility, we can set ourselves free and forge a path to a world where empathy, love, and caregiving claim their rightful power.

A Macmillan Audio production from Flatiron Books.

©2023 Rose Hackman (P)2023 Macmillan Audio

Critic reviews

“An urgent look at emotional labor and its various intersections that many of us only recognize as entering 'womanhood'—that we should edit the expression of our emotions to accommodate and elevate others. She challenges that the invisible work of women is not only an expectation of society but also a burden that is impossible to sustain. Hackman’s words reveal the agency of women is still possible while the power of care, empathy, and love in action can lead us to the best in our humanity.”
— Eve Rodsky, New York Times bestselling author of Fair Play and National Bestseller Find Your Unicorn Space

“In this welcome and informative volume, Hackman gives us a bracing, wide-angle view of the many hidden theaters of emotional labor—at the kitchen sink, check-out counter, corporate meeting. Done wisely, emotional labor is a great gift to civilization we should all know about—intimately.” — Arlie Hochschild, author of National Book Award finalist Strangers in Their Own Land and the New York Times bestseller The Second Shift

"Expertly blending case studies and statistics, this is a profound call for reorienting 'our fundamental value systems.'" — Publishers Weekly

Accessible Yet Far-Reaching

That this book was further reaching in its analysis was somewhat unanticipated and pleasantly surprising.

The author’s passion and undaunted desire to see things for what they are, challenge that we do the same, and move forward with compassion and unflinching self reflection in tow was deeply refreshing.

Gender, race, class, and sexuality are all regarded for discussion extensively and never is one discussed in exclusion of another.

To the person leaving the first review, confused, insecure, and lashing out—I hope you find your way back to this piece and allow yourself to absorb it. For the benefit of yourself and those around you.

Required Reading

This book was incredible. At times I wanted to cry and yell. It makes visable so much that goes unseen and unrecognized by the people who perform emotional labor. Thank you for this work Rose.

Words for what has always been felt but not thoroughly understood!

I am so glad I listened to this book recommended by a friend!! For me, this was one of those thoughtfully put together chapters and chapters of information I didn’t know I needed to know and has changed my mentality as a result. What I thought were innate qualities of mine, has instead become realized socialized ways of being I could alter! Thankful someone put in time to gather the research and share it was us who’ve felt burdened by the invisible labor of thoughtfulness.

A must read

This is one of those book that need to be read by everyone. I made me feel validation for all the things I have done and will do. That no amount of pay will compensate me for

excellent for men to listen to to gain an understanding of the worlds view on women

loved it. I listened while traveling in the car with my husband and we both got so much out of this book.

This book is incredible!

It thoughtfully gets to the root of so many of our individual and collective struggles. It’s kind, it’s clear, it’s honest and inspiring.

The importance of asking for reform.

I loved the updated information about the inequality of emotional labor in our society and what we CAN do to create a more sustainable planet.

Life Changing

Everyone should read this book. This book has validated and given a language to so many of my experiences as a woman.

Enlightening and Empowering

This is such an important piece of work in bringing clarity on conditioned ways of being that suppress us all from truly thriving in our personal lives and as a collective humanity.

Fantastic

The fact that the first visible review of this book as I write this is entirely reactive, defensive, and dismissive illustrates why this book is needed. I found it compelling and accurate to my experience, well researched, and I had several epiphanies while listening. No one is without accountability. Highly recommend.