Cookies: Sluts of the Snack World
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Narrated by:
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Ken La Salle
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By:
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Ken La Salle
About this listen
Are the voices in your head listening to you? Oh yes. Yes, they are listening to you. They know what you're saying. Sometimes, they talk back. Sometimes, they sing along. Sometimes, they write children's books with hidden messages placed in plain sight with a neon bow because, hey, a little style never hurt anyone. (This, of course, ignores the Great Style Massacre of 1973.)
Welcome to Fun To Grow On - the new children's book series for adults. These books are not for little children or big babies. Each story is filled with blood and violence, sex and swearing - seriously. This series is for adults. These are not parodies of children's books but original stories for adults who still have a lot to learn - as do we all. Fun To Grow On presents the very first book in the series, Cookies: Sluts of the Snack World! When a cookie gets herpes, he decides to ask God for a cure. Can he find God in time? Someone fed a chocolate chip cookie equal parts of blinding self-awareness, cranberry vodka, and shrooms and asked him to tell his story. Here it is, with all the pageantry you would expect from a cookie…which is probably a whole lot less than you would desire.
©2014 Ken La Salle (P)2014 Ken La SalleListeners also enjoyed...
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In this electric and provocative debut novel, Amber Tamblyn blends genres of poetry, prose, and elements of suspense to give shape to the shocking narratives of victims of sexual violence, mapping the destructive ways in which our society perpetuates rape culture, brilliantly brought to life through a multi-voice performance featuring Glenn Davis, Ben Foster, Marc Maron, Jason Ritter, John Roberts, Russ Tamblyn, Amber Tamblyn, January Lavoy, Phoebe Strole, Robin Miles, Thérèse Plummer, Dan Bittner, James Fouhey, and Michael Crouch.
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I've been finished with this for hours
- By Bill on 06-29-18
By: Amber Tamblyn
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In Search of Cleo
- How I Found My Pussy and Lost My Mind
- By: Gina Gershon
- Narrated by: Gina Gershon
- Length: 3 hrs and 12 mins
- Unabridged
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In Search of Cleo follows Gina’s desperation and despair when her assistant loses her beloved cat, Cleo. Gina spends two months roaming the back streets of Los Angeles at all hours of the night, searching for Cleo and meeting several quirky and outrageous characters who help or hinder her in different ways, including Ellen DeGeneres, who searches with Gina and recommends her pet psychic, Sonia; Arthur, the newspaper delivery man who gives her advice; and the mysterious fortune-teller....
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Loved it!!!
- By Kathryn Prusick Gould on 03-15-16
By: Gina Gershon
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Fashionably Dead
- By: Robyn Peterman
- Narrated by: Jessica Almasy
- Length: 12 hrs and 14 mins
- Unabridged
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Vampyres don't exist. They absolutely do not exist. At least I didn't think they did 'til I tried to quit smoking and ended up Undead. Who in the hell did I screw over in a former life that my getting healthy equates with dead? Now I'm a Vampyre. Yes, we exist whether we want to or not. However, I have to admit, the perks aren't bad. My girls no longer jiggle, my ass is higher than a kite, and the latest Prada keeps finding its way to my wardrobe.
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Porn
- By Jo Mc on 05-11-17
By: Robyn Peterman
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Gummi Bears Should Not Be Organic
- And Other Opinions I Can't Back Up with Facts
- By: Stefanie Wilder-Taylor
- Narrated by: Stefanie Wilder-Taylor
- Length: 4 hrs and 44 mins
- Unabridged
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In this latest mommy audiobook from the popular blogger, author, and TV personality, Stefanie will share her secrets for achieving a balance in motherhood between being protective and caring and downright bats--t crazy. She'll debunk some of the looniest parenting myths and reinforce others; she'll describe how, through as simple a process as good old trial and error, she's learned to pick and choose what works for her and her family, and tune out the rest.
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You’re A Parent Now...Don't Mess It Up
- By Tim on 04-16-15
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The Very Worst Missionary
- A Memoir or Whatever
- By: Jamie Wright
- Narrated by: Madeleine Lambert
- Length: 4 hrs and 58 mins
- Unabridged
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After finding Jesus at a suburban megachurch, young Jamie Wright trades in the easy life on the cul-de-sac for the green fields of Costa Rica. There, along with her husband, kids, and the family cat, she intends to serve God and make converts. But she soon loses faith and falls into a funk of cynicism and despair. Fortunately, Knives the cat is there, looking on with just enough disinterest to make her laugh...and dare her to try another way. That other way turns out to be telling the truth. She launches a renegade blog, Jamie the Very Worst Missionary, which wins a large following.
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Didn’t like the book
- By Jonathan on 04-17-20
By: Jamie Wright
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Wildflower
- By: Drew Barrymore
- Narrated by: Drew Barrymore
- Length: 7 hrs and 5 mins
- Unabridged
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Wildflower is a portrait of Drew's life in stories as she looks back on the adventures, challenges, and incredible experiences of her earlier years. It includes tales of living on her own at 14 (and how laundry may have saved her life), getting stuck in a gas station overhang on a cross-country road trip, saying good-bye to her father in a way only he could have understood, and many more adventures and lessons that have led her to the successful, happy, and healthy place she is today.
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Hold the shrieking !
- By Dawne on 11-27-15
By: Drew Barrymore
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Everything Is Awful
- And Other Observations
- By: Matt Bellassai
- Narrated by: Matt Bellassai
- Length: 6 hrs and 16 mins
- Unabridged
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From the break-out star of BuzzFeed and the People's Choice Award-winning comedian comes a collection of hilariously anguished essays chronicling awful moments from his life so far, the humiliations of being an adult, and other little indignities. Matt Bellassai has no idea what he's doing. Well, to be fair, he did become semi-Internet famous by getting drunk at work, making him a socially-acceptable - nay - professional alcoholic. He's got some things figured out. But the rest is all just a terrible, disgusting mess.
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Best Audio Book I’ve heard ever.
- By M on 11-23-17
By: Matt Bellassai
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Dear Girls Above Me
- Inspired by a True Story
- By: Charles McDowell
- Narrated by: Kirby Heyborne
- Length: 8 hrs and 1 min
- Unabridged
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When Charlie McDowell began sharing his open letters to his noisy upstairs neighbors - two impossibly ditzy female roommates in their mid-twenties - on Twitter, his feed quickly went viral. His followers multiplied and he got the attention of everyone from celebrities to production studios to major media outlets such as Time and Glamour.
Now Dear Girls breaks out of the 140-character limit as Charlie imagines what would happen if he put the wisdom of the girls to the test.
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An Enjoyable Listen
- By Elle W on 11-05-13
By: Charles McDowell
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Vodka is Vegan
- A Manifesto for Better Living and Not Being an A**hole
- By: Matt Letten, Phil Letten
- Narrated by: Phil Letten, Matt Letten
- Length: 4 hrs and 58 mins
- Unabridged
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Meet the bros who are making vegan sexy (and making eating animals weird). Think you could never go vegan? Think again. As this smart, funny and persuasive manifesto makes clear, you're already 90 percent vegan anyway. That's right - you already love animals and are slowly but surely eating less meat than you used to. With the insider tips and inspiring stories in this book, you'll be ready to go whole hog (see what we did there?) and eat vegan for good.
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Honest review from a fellow vodka drinking vegan..
- By AmazonAddict on 06-28-18
By: Matt Letten, and others
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This Is Gonna Hurt
- Music, Photography, and Life Through the Distorted Lens of Nikki Sixx
- By: Nikki Sixx
- Narrated by: Nikki Sixx
- Length: 3 hrs and 51 mins
- Unabridged
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This Is Gonna Hurt: Music, Photography And Life Through The Distorted Lens Of Nikki Sixx, is all Nikki Sixx. It is a collection of compelling photography and stories that capture the rage, love, optimism, darkness, and determination that shape his work.
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MUST HAVE!!
- By Yvonne on 05-28-11
By: Nikki Sixx
What listeners say about Cookies: Sluts of the Snack World
Average customer ratingsReviews - Please select the tabs below to change the source of reviews.
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- Kelly
- 12-18-14
great book with lots of humor.grab some milk/malt
Where does Cookies: Sluts of the Snack World rank among all the audiobooks you’ve listened to so far?
Great book! Ken La Sallle is a fantastic writer combining humor with the real stuff.
What was one of the most memorable moments of Cookies: Sluts of the Snack World?
I thinkthink, and maybe it's just me... what for me hooked me, was the first chapter. It totally set the tone for the entire book. So one moment??? For me, if it doesn't grab me right of the start, I won't read. This will mite than get your attention.
What about Ken La Salle’s performance did you like?
He is one of the funniest writer, without trying to be "funny" he's not out looking for the laugh, but his style of writing just come out fun and in times funny without effort. Which I see as a gift few writers possess. Toy don't set out to have fun teasing a book, Ken fines a way to bring that out.
If you were to make a film of this book, what would the tag line be?
I think the title says it all! That alone would make people want to know more. Cause your just not sure where he's going with it. And while your reading, your not sure either, abs I'm not sure he is either. So, tad would just be the title, it says so much and so little, how fun!
Any additional comments?
Personally this a different kind of book from the other great book I've read by Mr La Salle. And that's not in the least bit a bad thing. He still brings his wit, charm and somewhat dark humor along. From the first paragraph, let alone, chapter, you're hooked. You want to follow alone and see where he's taking you. He takes dyour hand leading you along. Ask the while you actually learn a thing or to and didn't even know it. A MUST READ. Then go check out the other books that are 180 and just as fantastic. A writerwriter to keep your write on.
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