A Good Apology
Four Steps to Make Things Right
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A Good Apology
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Narrated by:
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Molly Howes PhD
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Maggi-Meg Reed
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By:
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Molly Howes PhD
About this listen
Through its four essential steps, A Good Apology gives groundbreaking advice on how best to make an effective apology toward rebuilding any relationship, for listeners of The Body Keeps the Score.
We've all done something wrong or made a mistake or insulted someone - even if by accident. We've all been hurt and wanted the other person to help us heal. It may be surprising, but the breaches themselves aren't the real problem; our inability to fix them is what causes us trouble.
In A Good Apology, Dr. Molly Howes uses her experiences with patients in her practice, research findings, and news stories to illustrate the power and importance of a thorough apology. She teaches how we can all learn to craft an effective apology with four straightforward steps.
An apology is a small-scale event between people, but it's enormously powerful. This comprehensive book gives listeners the tools to fix their relationships, make amends, and move forward. With it, you'll fully understand the meaning and importance of this universal and timeless endeavor: a good apology.
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Critic reviews
"A Good Apology is a brilliant, beautifully written, impeccably researched book that should be read by anyone involved in conflict management, organizational consulting, coaching, or psychotherapy. Actually, I can think of no one who would not benefit - both personally and professionally - from this book's clear, analytical, and heartfelt exploration of the four essential steps in a successful apology. Molly Howes has given us a life-changing gift with her sage advice and evocative stories of hurt, apology, and reconciliation." (David A. Hoffman, Esq., mediator, arbitrator, collaborative lawyer)
"I hope the whole world reads this book! Dr. Howes explores the power of a genuine apology in intimate relationships, politics, medicine and more, and she provides an elegant road-map for negotiating this tricky terrain. The ability to apologize is an often overlooked, but centrally important, aspect of happy relationships. Seamlessly written and saturated with wisdom, this book shows what it takes to free the heart - ours and others." (Christopher Germer, PhD, author of The Mindful Path to Self-Compassion)
"In A Good Apology, Dr. Molly Howes expertly delves into a difficult topic that helps us all become more loving and connected. In today's hectic world, nurturing our relationships is paramount. Through stories of people struggling and other useful tips and tools, Dr. Howes creates a road map we can all use to thrive." (Dr. Zelana Montminy, behavioral scientist and author of 21 Days to Resilience)
Featured Article: An Apology—A Perfect Tool of Life
At one or many points in our lives we will owe someone an apology, and someone will owe us one as well. Many will get it right, by simply and sincerely saying "I’m sorry." They might even add, "What can I do to make this right?" Unfortunately, some will try but render their apology null and void by saying, "I'm sorry, but..." In an earnest apology, there is no "but." Much has been written on the subject from psychologists to humorists to trusted gatekeepers of etiquette whose engaging listens will guide you to the right apology.
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The Good Karma Divorce
- Avoid Litigation, Turn Negative Emotions into Positive Actions, and Get On with the Rest of Your Life
- By: Judge Michele F. Lowrance
- Narrated by: Judge Michele F. Lowrance
- Length: 4 hrs and 20 mins
- Abridged
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Overall4 out of 5 stars 57
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Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 37
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Story4.5 out of 5 stars 36
The average divorce takes two years with a median cost of $30,000. Yet the true cost of divorce is more than time or money; it is the legacy of the decisions made during the process. No matter how long two people have been married, whether there are children or not, divorce often leads to bad choices that can forever alter a family's life. But what if you could reverse the stereotype and move regret-free through this process?
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5 out of 5 stars
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Thanks for the great advice!
- By Tom Clemente on 11-09-16
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The Journey of the Heroic Parent
- Your Child's Struggle & The Road Home
- By: Brad M. Reedy Ph.D.
- Narrated by: Tom Parks
- Length: 8 hrs and 20 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall5 out of 5 stars 201
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Performance5 out of 5 stars 169
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Story5 out of 5 stars 169
When a child is hurting, it can be the most painful challenge a parent will face. With compassion and perspective, Dr. Brad Reedy offers hope and wisdom for children who struggle and the parents who love them. The Journey of the Heroic Parent will take you on a journey to a happier, healthier relationship with your struggling child - and yourself. Through lessons learned, mother, father, and child will achieve greater understanding, love, and humanity - no matter what the outcome.
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5 out of 5 stars
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Loved it! Will read over again and again!
- By wooplicity on 06-21-15
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Should I Stay or Should I Go?
- A Guide to Knowing If Your Relationship Can - and Should - Be Saved
- By: Lundy Bancroft, JAC Patrissi
- Narrated by: Stephen R. Thorne
- Length: 13 hrs and 51 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall4.5 out of 5 stars 275
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Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 234
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Story4.5 out of 5 stars 233
In this supportive and straightforward guide, Lundy Bancroft, the author of Why Does He Do That?, and communication specialist JAC Patrissi offer a way for women to practically take stock of their relationships and move forward, with or without their partners.
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5 out of 5 stars
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Paradigm Shift
- By Sydnee Adams-Hancock on 04-08-16
By: Lundy Bancroft, and others
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12 Smart Things to Do When the Booze and Drugs Are Gone
- Choosing Emotional Sobriety Through Self-Awareness and Right Action
- By: Allen Berger PhD
- Narrated by: Matthew Boston
- Length: 5 hrs and 24 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall4.5 out of 5 stars 32
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Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 25
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Story4.5 out of 5 stars 25
Allen Berger, PhD, draws on the teachings of Bill W. and psychotherapy pioneers to offer 12 hallmarks of emotional sobriety that, when practiced, give people the confidence to be accountable for their behavior, ask for what they want and need, and grow and develop a deeper trust in the process of life. These smart things include: understanding who you are and what's important to you; learning not to take others' reactions personally; trusting your inner compass; and taking responsibility for your reactions to problematic situations.
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5 out of 5 stars
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Rich exploration and application of ES principles
- By rdkemper on 08-12-23
By: Allen Berger PhD
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How to Be a Best Friend Forever
- Making and Keeping Lifetime Relationships
- By: Dr. John Townsend
- Narrated by: Dr. John Townsend
- Length: 2 hrs and 13 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall4.5 out of 5 stars 105
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Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 84
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Story4 out of 5 stars 83
Our world has diluted the meaning of friendship, but the reality is, there’s nothing like the sustaining strength of true-blue, forever friends. Still, many people are convinced that they’ll never find such lifelong connections—or that they don’t need them. In this encouraging audio book, best-selling author and psychologist John Townsend delivers hope and help for making these relationships a reality—and for making them even better if you’ve already got a “bestie.”
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2 out of 5 stars
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This is a Christian based book.
- By lisak227 on 11-17-14
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I Want This to Work
- An Inclusive Guide to Navigating the Most Difficult Relationship Issues We Face in the Modern Age
- By: Elizabeth Earnshaw LMFT CGT
- Narrated by: Elizabeth Earnshaw LMFT CGT
- Length: 9 hrs and 27 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall4.5 out of 5 stars 45
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Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 38
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Story4.5 out of 5 stars 37
Elizabeth Earnshaw is here to help. The renowned Gottman therapist, founder of A Better Life Therapy, and influential Instagram therapist behind @lizlistens has helped to transform countless relationships. With I Want This to Work, she presents for today’s generation the most effective and proven steps for relationship success.
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3 out of 5 stars
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I want this to work too. Excellent information, excruciating execution
- By Sunny Bettley on 03-17-23
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How Can I Forgive You?
- The Courage to Forgive, the Freedom Not To
- By: Janis A. Spring, Michael Spring
- Narrated by: Coleen Marlo
- Length: 7 hrs and 33 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall4.5 out of 5 stars 94
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Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 79
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Story4.5 out of 5 stars 79
Until now, we have been taught that forgiveness is good for us and that good people forgive. Dr. Spring, a gifted therapist and the award-winning author of After the Affair, proposes a radical, life-affirming alternative that lets us overcome the corrosive effects of hate and get on with our lives - without forgiving. She also offers a powerful and unconventional model for genuine forgiveness - one that asks as much of the offender as it does of us.
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3 out of 5 stars
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I'm a Christian
- By jelady on 06-14-19
By: Janis A. Spring, and others
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When Friendship Hurts
- How to Deal with Friends Who Betray, Abandon, or Wound You
- By: Jan Yager Ph.D.
- Narrated by: Tanya Eby
- Length: 7 hrs and 30 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall4.5 out of 5 stars 60
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Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 49
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Story4 out of 5 stars 48
We’ve all had friendships that have gone bad. Whether it takes the form of a simple yet inexplicable estrangement or a devastating betrayal, a failed friendship can make your life miserable, threaten your success at work or school, and even undermine your romantic relationships. Finally there is help. In When Friendship Hurts, Jan Yager, recognized internationally as a leading expert on friendship, explores what causes friendships to falter and explains how to mend them - or end them.
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1 out of 5 stars
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Boring and patronizing
- By KDS on 11-17-22
By: Jan Yager Ph.D.
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The Codependency Recovery Plan
- A 5-Step Guide to Understand, Accept, and Break Free from the Codependent Cycle
- By: Krystal Mazzola M.Ed LMFT
- Narrated by: Linda Henning
- Length: 4 hrs and 19 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall4.5 out of 5 stars 143
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Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 111
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Story4.5 out of 5 stars 111
You can say no. You can stop people-pleasing and start setting boundaries. You can ask for what you need. You can love and be loved - without sacrifice - by breaking the codependency cycle. The Codependency Recovery Plan empowers you to have healthy, happy interdependent relationships. This actionable five-step program is designed to help you get in touch with yourself, assert boundaries, and communicate confidently. You’ll be free to nurture true intimacy.
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5 out of 5 stars
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Great content, audio not for the neurodiverse
- By Danielle A on 01-30-23
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Trust Again
- By: Debi Silber PhD
- Narrated by: Debi Silber PhD
- Length: 7 hrs and 36 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall4.5 out of 5 stars 39
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Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 36
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Story4.5 out of 5 stars 36
During times of betrayal, when we most need support, sometimes the ones we would turn to first are the betrayers. Other times, we’re saddled with shame and fear. But it’s during these times that we need to learn to trust again. This book offers support, comfort, and community to those struggling with feelings associated with betrayal and guides them to healing from painful experiences of it. Listeners will learn about and move through five stages from betrayal to breakthrough and will be lovingly guided with tools and strategies along the way.
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5 out of 5 stars
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Life changing
- By KM on 07-27-22
By: Debi Silber PhD
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Something's Not Right
- Decoding the Hidden Tactics of Abuse - and Freeing Yourself from Its Power
- By: Wade Mullen
- Narrated by: Wade Mullen
- Length: 4 hrs and 50 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall4.5 out of 5 stars 57
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Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 49
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Story4.5 out of 5 stars 46
In his debut book, researcher and advocate Wade Mullen introduces us to the groundbreaking world of impression management - the strategies that individuals and organizations utilize to gain power and cover up their wrongdoings. Mullen reveals a pattern that accompanies many types of abuse, almost as if abusers are somehow reading from the same playbook. If we can learn to decode these evil methods - if we can learn the language of abuse - we can help stop the cycle and make abusers less effective at accomplishing destruction in our lives.
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4 out of 5 stars
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Emotional and spiritual abuse matters
- By Adam Shields on 01-26-23
By: Wade Mullen
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Recovering from Emotionally Immature Parents
- Practical Tools to Establish Boundaries and Reclaim Your Emotional Autonomy
- By: Lindsay C. Gibson PsyD
- Narrated by: Suzie Althens
- Length: 7 hrs and 16 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall5 out of 5 stars 565
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Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 474
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Story5 out of 5 stars 470
In this important sequel to Adult Children of Emotionally Immature Parents, author Lindsay Gibson offers powerful tools to help you step back and protect yourself at the first sign of an emotional takeover, make sure your emotions and needs are respected, and break free from the coercive control of emotionally immature parents.
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1 out of 5 stars
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Asinine
- By Amazon Customer on 07-14-20
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Crucial Conversations
- Tools for Talking When Stakes Are High
- By: Kerry Patterson, Joseph Grenny, Ron McMillan, and others
- Narrated by: Anna Fields
- Length: 4 hrs and 17 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall4.5 out of 5 stars 232
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Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 191
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Story4.5 out of 5 stars 191
When stakes are high, opinions vary, and emotions run strong, you have three choices: avoid a crucial conversation and suffer the consequences; handle the conversation badly and suffer the consequences; or check out Crucial Conversations and discover how to communicate best when it matters most. Crucial Conversations gives you the tools you need to step up to life's most difficult and important conversations, say what's on your mind, and achieve the positive resolutions you want.
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5 out of 5 stars
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Probably the worste nagging sounding narrator
- By Alexander on 09-27-21
By: Kerry Patterson, and others
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The Emotionally Destructive Relationship
- Seeing It, Stopping It, Surviving It
- By: Leslie Vernick
- Narrated by: Leslie Vernick
- Length: 7 hrs and 16 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall5 out of 5 stars 46
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Performance5 out of 5 stars 32
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Story5 out of 5 stars 32
Leslie Vernick, counselor and social worker, has witnessed the devastating effects of emotional abuse. Many, including many in the church, have not addressed this form of destruction in families and relationships because it is difficult to talk about. With godly guidance and practical experience, Vernick offers an empathetic approach to recognizing an emotionally destructive relationship and addresses the symptoms and the damage with biblical tools.
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5 out of 5 stars
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Thank you
- By Anonymous User on 08-27-24
By: Leslie Vernick
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Fierce Self-Compassion
- How Women Can Harness Kindness to Speak Up, Claim Their Power, and Thrive
- By: Kristin Neff
- Narrated by: Jean Ann Douglass
- Length: 12 hrs and 34 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall4.5 out of 5 stars 305
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Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 258
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Story4.5 out of 5 stars 257
Kristin Neff changed how we talk about self-care with her enormously popular first book, Self-Compassion. Now, 10 years and many studies later, she expands her body of work to explore a brand-new take on self-compassion. Although kindness and self-acceptance allow us to be with ourselves as we are, in all our glorious imperfection, the desire to alleviate suffering at the heart of this mindset isn't always gentle, sometimes it's fierce.
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2 out of 5 stars
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Liberal Activism distracting
- By Janiene on 07-26-21
By: Kristin Neff
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Relationship Breakthrough
- How to Create Outstanding Relationships in Every Area of Your Life
- By: Cloe Madanes, Anthony Robbins
- Narrated by: Aimee Jolson
- Length: 6 hrs and 32 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall4.5 out of 5 stars 402
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Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 342
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Story4.5 out of 5 stars 343
Everyone faces the challenges of making relationships work. Whether with spouses, family members, friends, lovers, or colleagues, relationships have the power to make one feel happy, frustrated, or miserable. In Relationship Breakthrough, Cloe Madanes - an expert in creating healing, empowering relationships - gives listeners vital tools to transform their relationships and their lives. Madanes's cutting-edge methods produce real results and create rewarding, sustainable relationships.
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3 out of 5 stars
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Disappointed
- By Dee on 01-10-16
By: Cloe Madanes, and others
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The DNA of Relationships
- By: Dr. Gary Smalley
- Narrated by: Chris Fabry
- Length: 6 hrs and 44 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall4.5 out of 5 stars 288
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Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 222
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Story4.5 out of 5 stars 220
We are designed for relationships, yet they often bring us pain. In this paradigm-shifting book, Gary Smalley unravels the DNA of relationships: we are made for three great relationships, with God, others, and ourselves, and all relationships involve choice. Gary exposes a destructive relationship dance that characterizes nearly every relationship conflict, and he offers five new dance steps that will revolutionize relationships.
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2 out of 5 stars
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Could be half as long
- By Christine on 01-06-08
By: Dr. Gary Smalley
What listeners say about A Good Apology
Average customer ratingsReviews - Please select the tabs below to change the source of reviews.
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Overall5 out of 5 stars
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Performance5 out of 5 stars
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Story5 out of 5 stars
- Cline
- 10-13-22
excellent. don't suck at apologizing forever.
be a better person. be better at understanding, forgive, and start on path you and yours should have been on since the start.
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Overall4 out of 5 stars
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Performance4 out of 5 stars
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Story5 out of 5 stars
- Kellie
- 04-08-21
The book I’ve been searching for
I’ve been caught up in family drama and turmoil for years some of it initiated by me. This book has really helped me boundaries in my own mind about what I want to claim responsibility for and how to possibly elicit accountability on their part. I found this very insightful. I have no model in my life or how to apologize let alone doing it well. I wish I could send this book to everyone in my family.
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1 person found this helpful