This week, we’re revisiting one of our most popular episodes, and a topic people continue to ask us about.

People pleasing. We’ve all seen it before (whether we recognized it or not) - constantly being agreeable, always saying yes, never setting any boundaries - all to the point of self-destruction. If you haven’t experienced it yourself, it’s likely you’ve witnessed someone else demonstrate these behaviors.

And although it may have short-term benefits, we know that these self-destructive tendencies are not sustainable, and can lead to mental, physical, and emotional exhaustion and burnout.

If this is something you think you might struggle with, or if you know someone who does, today’s episode provides a wide variety of perspectives on what “people pleasing” can look like in the day to day world, a number of root causes, and a handful of different solutions you can use to help you manage these behaviors.

More specifically, Brett dives into:

• Quotes that hit - some of the most impactful sound bites I’ve heard on the topic
• What drives you? How our drives can lead us into unhealthy people pleasing behaviors
• The downside to many of the mainstream self-help resources that address the topic
• The necessary self-reflection that has to take place before we can make long-lasting behavioral changes

Host your own AOC Inservice - Tackle leadership challenges with tailored workshops trusted by Apple, NFL teams, and Canadian Special Forces. Gain actionable tools for managing emotions, de-escalating tension, and rebuilding culture. Email us at info@artofcoaching.com to learn more, and visit artofcoaching.com to see how we can help.

AOC Private Mentoring Retreat - Join us in Phoenix for a two-day retreat focused on resetting and crushing your goals. With custom coaching, private suites, and access to exclusive facilities, this experience is built for you. Email info@artofcoaching.com to secure your spot!

Improv Only Workshop - Boost problem-solving, creativity, and teamwork through fun, interactive improv games. Trusted by Google and pro sports teams, this workshop delivers skills that stick. Email info@artofcoaching.com with "Improv Only Workshop" in the subject line.

Referenced Resources:

E210: Assertiveness: How To Ask For What You Want & Get What You Need

E207: How Perception Impacts Communication & Relationships

E208: Robert Greene: Mastering Human Nature and Facing Your Flaws

E200: What To Do When Trying To Help Makes Stuff Worse

E176: When Positive Thinking Doesn’t Work

E22: The Value of Self-Doubt

E130: How Understanding Drives Helps Build Buy-In

Quiz: What Drives You?

Online Course: Valued - mentioned in today’s episode regarding opportunity cost, this life-time access course help you to identify your values and take control of your career

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Website: ArtofCoaching.com

Instagram: @coach_brettb

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We’ve all been there, and watched it happen from afar.

Something happens, and the temperature starts to rise. Tempers flare, and the situation becomes heated. These moments can reveal sides of us we’re not particularly proud of.

How should we respond when life gets tense and others lack empathy or communicate in passive-aggressive ways? What actions can we take to navigate these difficult interactions without making things worse?

To move forward, we must find a way to counter our adrenaline, exude control, and convey compassion. Avoidance is never the answer. The only way out is through.

In today’s practical, real-world episode, Brett discusses:

• • The #1 thing people ultimately want in conflict
  • Conflict archetypes and the importance of knowing which one you are
  • How and when to make concessions without “losing” or admitting fault
  • Why taking a pause or a deep breath isn’t the most practical advice

• BONUS: A crash course in how to NOT piss people off

Want to host your own AOC Inservice?

As a leader, you’ve likely thought, “There’s got to be a better way to handle this.” That’s where we come in. We’ve helped organizations like Apple, Microsoft, NFL and MLS teams, and even the Canadian Special Forces tackle tough topics like managing culture and navigating messy internal dynamics.

Each inservice is tailored to the unique needs of your team. This isn’t a cookie-cutter, feel-good workshop. We deliver actionable tools to manage emotions, de-escalate tension, rebuild culture, and communicate more effectively - tools you can apply NOW.

Email us at info@artofcoaching.com to learn more, and visit artofcoaching.com to see how we can help.

Come spend two days with us at AOC HQ!

This year, we’re thrilled to open our doors in Phoenix, AZ, for an exclusive two-day retreat tailored entirely to you! With a personalized curriculum, access to our gym and pool, private suites, and the camaraderie of like-minded individuals, you’ll leave with clarity, focus, and renewed energy to crush your goals.

Don’t let this opportunity pass you by! Email us at info@artofcoaching.com to learn more and secure your spot today.

Improv Only Workshop

Work in a high-stakes environment that demands constant focus? If you or your team need to disconnect and have fun—while building skills like problem-solving, active listening, and creative thinking—this workshop is for you!

Top companies like Google and professional sports teams have hired US to run these workshops, using games inspired by Whose Line Is It Anyway? tailored to meet specific professional goals. They’ve seen tremendous value, and we’re confident you will too.

Interested? Email info@artofcoaching.com with "Improv Only Workshop" in the subject line for more details!

Related Episodes:

E310 | A Key Strategy For Avoiding Misunderstandings

E294 | Why Do I Freeze Up? How To Handle Stressful Situations Like A Pro

Follow Us:

Website: ArtofCoaching.com

Instagram: @coach_brettb

X: @coach_brettb

Have you ever heard the phrase, "no plan survives first contact," or, "everyone has a plan until they get punched in the face"?

These sayings might sound dramatic, but let’s be honest, they ring true. Life has a way of throwing curveballs at us, especially when we’re chasing our biggest, scariest goals.

When that happens, we’re often quick to rationalize, intellectualize, or make excuses for why we didn’t follow through. It’s human nature, but it doesn’t have to be the end of the story. The real question is: how can we stay the course, even when the unexpected happens?

Consistency is the truest measure of excellence and a life well lived. So, how do we tether ourselves to it? How do we make progress and avoid giving ground to the circumstances and stressors, both good and bad, that we inevitably face?

In this motivational episode, we cover:

• The most important component of credibility and how to maintain it
• How to stay consistent in the areas of life where progress and growth are critical
• Building your own daily tracker to hold yourself accountable
• Avoiding the rut and keeping momentum alive, one small task at a time

Have a topic or question you’d like us to tackle on the podcast? Let us know at artofcoaching.com/question. We’re always striving to make our content as impactful and helpful as possible for our loyal listeners.

If you’d like our daily productivity template sent directly to your inbox for FREE, subscribe to our newsletter! Visit artofcoaching.com/begin to be the first to gain access to new courses, event dates, exclusive discounts, and new resources. Click here to stay in the loop!

We’re excited to announce the launch of TWO NEW EVENTS in 2025!

Writer’s Workshop - Whether you’re crafting social media posts, blogs, or even your first book, writing doesn’t have to be a solitary, soul-sucking grind. Choose between personalized 1-on-1 coaching or join a small, live, two-day workshop (limited to 10 participants) where we’ll help take the pain out of penning and show you how to put your unique style onto the page.

Private Retreat at AOC HQ - Join us in Phoenix, AZ, for an exclusive two-day retreat tailored entirely to you. With personalized plans, access to our gym and pool, private suites, and the camaraderie of like-minded individuals, you’ll leave with clarity, focus, and renewed energy to crush your goals.

Don’t miss these opportunities. Email us at info@artofcoaching.com to learn more and secure your spot today!

Ready to take action and improve your professional life?

The Coalition is a mentoring group for anyone serious about growth—no fluff, no pretension. Whether you’re leaving the corporate grind, scaling a business, or making bold career moves, this group is for you.

With two monthly Zoom calls, you’ll gain clarity, accountability, and the support of a driven community to help you take meaningful action.

Applications for the next round starting in 2025 are open now. Apply at artofcoaching.com/coalition.

If you want to uncover what truly drives you—and what moves others—take our FREE Drives Quiz at artofcoaching.com/whatdrivesyou. Unlike traditional tools like DISC or Myers-Briggs, our algorithm is designed to dig deeper, call out any BS, and even flag potential lies or aspirational answers to give you honest, actionable insights.

Learn about yourself, uncover your blind spots, and start by using this game changing tool today!

Related Episodes:

E49 | Productivity That Matters

Follow Us:

Website: ArtofCoaching.com

Instagram: @coach_brettb

X: @coach_brettb

New year, new you, right?

Many of us set resolutions and goals this time of year, which is a great way to start fresh. But let’s be honest: flipping the calendar doesn’t magically fix everything in our lives.

If we want to truly step up as leaders, spouses, parents, or high achievers, we need to confront the uncomfortable “stuff” we’ve been avoiding. It’s about unpacking the baggage we’ve been dragging along, facing it head-on, and making the changes that not only improve our lives but also ripple out to everyone around us.

It’s not easy. In fact, it might be harder than losing that last 15 pounds or finally contributing more to your retirement—but that’s why you’re here. So let’s get to work.

In today’s episode, Brett discusses:

• Carl Jung’s concept of The Shadow and how it can help you become a better leader
• The true definition of culture and how to forge a resilient group identity
• Strategies to recognize and address your internal struggles
• The damage caused when avoided baggage “leaks” out onto our loved ones

Today’s episode touched on unpacking your inner baggage—the rationalizations, intellectualizing, and excuses that hold you back. If you’re ready to take action, there’s no better place to work on yourself than at one of our live workshops.

Join us at The Apprenticeship in New Jersey this March, where we’ll dive into human behavior, why we act the way we do, and how to overcome the obstacles we create for ourselves. Through interactive activities like improv and practical exercises, you’ll walk away with tools to lead more effectively—both personally and professionally.

Check out all of our 2025 dates at artofcoaching.com/events. Don’t wait, spaces fill fast!

Ready to take action and improve your professional life?

The Coalition is a mentoring group for anyone who’s serious about growth, without the fluff or pretension of a typical “mastermind.” Whether you’re dreaming of leaving the corporate grind to start your own small business, running a business but ready to scale to the next level, or simply looking to make bold moves in your career, this group is for you.

With two recorded Zoom calls a month, we provide a private, welcoming environment where you’ll gain clarity, accountability, and a trusted community that pushes you to take real, meaningful action. This isn’t just another networking group, it’s a place to focus on what matters and actually get things done.

Applications for the next round starting in 2025 are open now. Apply at artofcoaching.com/coalition.

If you want to uncover what truly drives you—and what moves others—take our FREE Drives Quiz at artofcoaching.com/whatdrivesyou. Unlike traditional tools like DISC or Myers-Briggs, our algorithm is designed to dig deeper, call out any BS, and even flag potential lies or aspirational answers to give you honest, actionable insights.

Learn about yourself, uncover your blind spots, and start influencing more effectively today!

Related Episodes:

E340 | Framework Bandwagons & The Illusion of Competence

E344 | Tips For ‘Balancing’ Work And Family Life

Follow Us:

Website: ArtofCoaching.com

Instagram: @coach_brettb

X: @coach_brettb

This week, we’re revisiting one of our most popular episodes, because the questions about this topic just keep coming! While giving feedback is a skill many want to master, the real secret lies in learning how to receive it. (’Tis the inverse of the season)

Hearing where we can improve is tough, and the common advice about giving feedback—like the “sandwich technique”—often falls flat in real-world situations. Instead of sharing surface-level tactics, we’re diving into strategies that actually work, both for receiving and giving feedback effectively.

In this throwback episode, we cover:

• The science behind why we often respond poorly to feedback
• Why rationalizing doesn’t help (and how to stop doing it)
• What to say when you receive feedback you don’t understand or agree with
• When it’s appropriate to reject someone’s feedback

THE COALITION – Hurry, the doors are closing soon! Less than a month left to apply for the next round.

The Coalition is a mentoring group designed for busy professionals ready to grow. With two recorded Zoom calls a month, we provide a private, welcoming environment where you’ll gain clarity, accountability, and the support of a community that pushes you to take action.

This group is for everyone—whether you’re taking on new projects at work and need guidance, ready to turn your side hustle into your main gig, or an experienced professional looking to scale your business. The Coalition is your personal group of trusted advisors to help you focus on what truly matters. No fluff, just real progress.

Apply now at artofcoaching.com/coalition/

READING LIST – Ever wonder what books we recommend on topics like leadership, communication, psychology, and beyond? Check out our curated reading list, which we get asked about just as much as today’s topic! Visit artofcoaching.com/readinglist to dive in and find your next great read.

ALL THE FREE STUFF – If the reading list isn’t quite enough for you and you want to check out our other free resources, we’ve got plenty to choose from! Head over to artofcoaching.com/resources to see what’s available and start exploring.

COME SEE US – Think the free stuff is good? Imagine the impact of connecting with us in person! Check out the 2025 Art of Coaching Live Events calendar to see what we’re cooking up. Don’t miss your chance to join us for a transformative experience!

STAY IN THE LOOP – Sign up for our newsletter at artofcoaching.com/begin to stay updated on our latest content, exclusive discounts, and early access to events. Don’t miss a thing!

Related Episodes:

E194 | How To Become A Better Listener

E127 | How To Give The Most Effective Feedback

E85 | Why Won’t They Listen To Me? Reasons Your Message Isn’t Getting Across

Follow Us:

Website: ArtofCoaching.com

Instagram: @coach_brettb

X: @coach_brettb

There’s nowhere lonelier in the world than rock bottom.

It’s a place where overwhelm, anxiety, and uncertainty feel relentless, and the total weight of your burden makes moving forward seem impossible. Staying down is a choice, but it’s one that you really can’t afford to make.

Before you pick yourself up, you need to know exactly where you are. When you recognize where the demons holding you down come from, you can see the path you need to take to fight back and regain control.

It’s not about hacks, quick fixes, or the perfect framework. It’s about facing the hard truth head-on, with squared shoulders, and taking action, even when the easy choice is to stay down.

In this episode we cover:

• The three most common responses to overwhelm and a “salty” alternative
• How to categorize our stressors so we can divide and conquer
• Self discrepancy theory and making peace with our whole selves
• Investing in yourself and the pitfalls of “playing tight”

To get the most out of this episode, and every episode in our library, download our free bonus reflection question sheets. They’re designed to help you think deeper, organize your thoughts, apply what you’ve learned, and TAKE ACTION.

You still have time to take advantage of our HOLIDAY SALE!

Visit artofcoaching.com/blackfriday to take advantage of these limited-time deals:

30% OFF COURSES – Build your skills in leadership, communication, and more at your own pace.

20% OFF MENTORING – Get personalized coaching tailored to your specific goals.

10% OFF LIVE EVENTS – Join us for hands-on workshops and connect with like-minded professionals.

These are the largest discounts we offer all year. Treat yourself—or someone else this holiday season—to the gift of more meaningful connections, deeper personal growth, and becoming a more effective leader..

Looking for the perfect holiday gift?

Fill your stockings with a signed copy of Conscious Coaching. It’s a great gift for friends, family, or even your entire staff. Bulk orders are available, and each book will be personally signed!

Your support of our small business means the world to us. We’re incredibly grateful for the chance to personally thank you for being part of our community!

THE APPRENTICESHIP – We’re heading to the Northeast March 22-23 for our ONLY stop in the Northeast next year! Join us at King Strength & Performance in Livingston, NJ, for a hands-on, 2-day workshop designed to transform how you lead, communicate, and connect. Whether you’re looking to develop leadership skills, improve your ability to sell, navigate tough conversations, or gain a deeper understanding of strategic communication and power dynamics, this course is for you.

No fluff—just real practice, coaching, and feedback. You’ll leave with actionable tools, including a communication evaluation framework to handle any conversation with confidence.

Discounts are available for first responders, students, and groups, plus early bird pricing is LIVE NOW until February 22, 2025. Email info@artofcoaching.com for more information and reserve your spot today!

Related Episodes:

E301 | Time and Energy Management Tips To Keep You Sane

E273 | The Productivity Myth: Tips For Making Sustainable Progress Without Sacraficing Your Sanity

E263 | Putting Yourself First: Why Being Strategically Selfish Will Make You A Better Leader

E49 | Productivity That Matters

Referenced Resources:

Our FREE Drives Quiz

Follow Us:

Website: ArtofCoaching.com

Instagram: @coach_brettb

X: @coach_brettb