When Your Adult Child Breaks Your Heart

Coping with Mental Illness, Substance Abuse, and the Problems that Tear Families Apart

By: Joel Young MD, Christine Adamec

Narrated by: Rich Miller

Behind nearly every adult who is accused of a crime, becomes addicted to drugs or alcohol, or who is severely mentally ill and acting out in public, there is usually at least one extremely stressed-out parent. This parent may initially react with the bad news of their adult child behaving badly with, "Oh no!" followed by, "How can I help to fix this?" A very common third reaction is the thought, "Where did I go wrong - was it something I said or did, or that I failed to do when my child was growing up that caused these issues? Is this really somehow all my fault?"

These parents then open their homes, their pocketbooks, their hearts, and their futures to "saving" their adult child - who may go on to leave them financially and emotionally broken. Sometimes these families also raise the children their adult children leave behind: 1.6 million grandparents in the US are in this situation.

This helpful book presents families with quotations and scenarios from real suffering parents (who are not identified), practical advice, and tested strategies for coping. It also discusses the fact that parents of adult children may themselves need therapy and medications, especially antidepressants. The book is written in a clear, reassuring manner by Dr. Joel L. Young, medical director of the Rochester Center for Behavioral Medicine.

©2013 Joel L. Young, MD and Christine Adamec (P)2020 Tantor

Glad I stumbled upon this…

I’m glad I stumbled upon this book. I found it helpful and informative. I recommend it to others.

Highly Recommended! You need this book!

I recommend this book to anyone dealing with any of these topics directly or indirectly. It's been a few months since I read it but I had to come back and leave a review because it was so good and helped me through really tough times. I grately appreciate how the authors tied in the medical aspect with different real & tough examples. I didn't need fluff. I needed to try to make sense of things. I can only imagine that this book took a long time to write as there is so much substance.

An important resource for parents struggling

As a mother of five nearly adult children and a parent coach who works specifically with the parents of young adults, this book is a valuable resource for parents who are struggling with their children who have serious problems such as substance abuse, mental health, and/or personality disorders.

Absorbing

Lots of good information. Enhanced my understanding of the problems and available treatment and response options .

I’m reading it again. I learned from this what was wrong.

I didn’t understand what was wrong with my child until he explained the diagnosis of ADHD and daily alcohol can cause violence, and acting in such hurtful, unlawful, and awful ways, even to family with no care about us, and lies and blaming to cover it up.
It doesn’t fix the problem, but I learned so much! I like that he breaks it down because every chapters isn’t needed for everyone.
His question, “Do you remember what you did to your child….?” Then his response to that question might help you realize, it’s not you.

looking at my broken heart.

I was hoping for a magical answer on how to fix a broken child and mend my broken heart 💔 Making tough choices is sometimes the only solution.

Great Resource for information on Mental Health

From page one the author takes you on a journey of exploration into the area of
mental health. This is a great book for anyone who has had a child or knows someone whose child suffers from mental illness. It is honest and directly to the point.