Welcome to Fae Cafe
High Court of the Coffee Bean, Book 1
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Welcome to Fae Cafe
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Narrated by:
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Sarah Kisko
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By:
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Jennifer Kropf
About this listen
There are 10 golden rules if you want to survive an encounter with a fae:
- Don’t ask their name.
- If they ask you what your name is, lie.
- Avoid looking directly into their eyes.
- Don’t invite them to your book club.
- Don’t instigate a snowball fight.
- Never let them burn their mouth on coffee.
- Don’t ask them where they’re from.
- Don’t tell them where you live.
- Never mention their queen.
- Don’t try to kill them with an ordinary human gun.
If you fail to do any of these things, enslave them immediately.
On a cozy fall morning, Kate Kole is nestled in a coffee shop in the city of Toronto reading her favourite novel, when she accidentally kills a guy who's being rude to the coffee shop's cashier. Unfortunately for Kate, the person she killed was a fae assassin of the North Corner of Ever, visiting the human realm in secret.
From there, four deadly fae assassins come to the human realm to hunt her down for breaking a fairy law and killing one of their own. Leading them is Prince Cressica Alabastian, the most feared and deadly fae assassin of the North and heir to the North Corner of Ever.
After the assassins arrive in the human realm, things go terribly wrong. To Prince Cressica's horror, his assassins unwittingly get roped into running a cozy café on Kate Kole's behalf. To blend in, the fae assassins are forced to learn how to do basic human activities like cleaning up after themselves, driving without road rage, reading popular fantasy books at book club without getting into alpha male fights over what they’re reading, and, in general, be nice, all to blend into regular human society.
With a temper like no other, and deadly power that's unmatched, Prince Cressica seeks to get revenge on Kate Kole. But as he aims to strike where it will hurt her the most, the Prince finds himself enchanted by his human target in more ways than one. And when the darkness of the Ever Corners comes knocking at the human realm's door, he needs to make a choice that could cost him everything.
Welcome to Fae Café is like Holly Black’s tricky Folk of the Air schemes meeting your grandmother’s freshly baked chocolate chip cookies. With a sweet, comical romance and relatable slice-of-life moments colliding with manipulative fairy games and deathmatches, this book puts a spin on the typical fae stories listeners know and love and aims to be the coziest rom-com fae book of all time.
This book may leave you with answers to questions you never know you wanted to ask, such as, "How many fae assassins does it take to screw in a lightbulb?"
With coziness for days, Welcome to Fae Café is a new spin on some of the most popular fae fantasy tropes, in a setting where fae most definitely don't belong. If you liked LEGENDS AND LATTES, by Travis Baldree, this may just be your cup of tea. (Or coffee.)
©2023 Jennifer Kropf (P)2023 Jennifer KropfListeners also enjoyed...
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Guy Montag is a fireman. In his world, where television rules and literature is on the brink of extinction, firemen start fires rather than put them out. His job is to destroy the most illegal of commodities, the printed book, along with the houses in which they are hidden. Montag never questions the destruction and ruin his actions produce, returning each day to his bland life and wife, Mildred, who spends all day with her television "family."
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4 out of 5 stars
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Wish I Hadn't Cliff Noted This in High School
- By Joel on 03-27-17
By: Ray Bradbury
-
Project Hail Mary
- By: Andy Weir
- Narrated by: Ray Porter
- Length: 16 hrs and 10 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall5 out of 5 stars 186,037
-
Performance5 out of 5 stars 169,928
-
Story5 out of 5 stars 169,375
Ryland Grace is the sole survivor on a desperate, last-chance mission - and if he fails, humanity and the Earth itself will perish. Except that right now, he doesn't know that. He can't even remember his own name, let alone the nature of his assignment or how to complete it. All he knows is that he's been asleep for a very, very long time. And he's just been awakened to find himself millions of miles from home, with nothing but two corpses for company.
-
5 out of 5 stars
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Bazinga
- By Davidgonzalezsr on 05-04-21
By: Andy Weir
-
George Orwell’s 1984
- An Audible Original adaptation
- By: George Orwell, Joe White - adaptation
- Narrated by: Andrew Garfield, Cynthia Erivo, Andrew Scott, and others
- Length: 3 hrs and 27 mins
- Original Recording
-
Overall4.5 out of 5 stars 9,734
-
Performance5 out of 5 stars 9,226
-
Story4.5 out of 5 stars 9,225
It’s 1984, and life has changed beyond recognition. Airstrip One, formerly known as Great Britain, is a place where Big Brother is always watching, and nobody can hide. Except, perhaps, for Winston Smith. Whilst working at the Ministry of Truth, rewriting history, he secretly dreams of freedom. And in a world where love and sex are forbidden, where it’s hard to distinguish between friend and foe, he meets Julia and O’Brien and vows to rebel.
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5 out of 5 stars
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A Revelation!
- By wotsallthisthen on 04-07-24
By: George Orwell, and others
-
The Martian
- By: Andy Weir
- Narrated by: Wil Wheaton
- Length: 10 hrs and 59 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall5 out of 5 stars 38,224
-
Performance5 out of 5 stars 34,004
-
Story5 out of 5 stars 33,900
Six days ago, astronaut Mark Watney became one of the first people to walk on Mars. Now, he's sure he'll be the first person to die there. After a dust storm nearly kills him and forces his crew to evacuate while thinking him dead, Mark finds himself stranded and completely alone with no way to even signal Earth that he’s alive - and even if he could get word out, his supplies would be gone long before a rescue could arrive. But Mark isn't ready to give up yet.
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1 out of 5 stars
-
I love Wil Wheaton but why not R. C. Bray?
- By L. Newman on 01-11-20
By: Andy Weir
-
Starter Villain
- By: John Scalzi
- Narrated by: Wil Wheaton
- Length: 8 hrs and 5 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall4.5 out of 5 stars 11,168
-
Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 9,912
-
Story4.5 out of 5 stars 9,906
Inheriting your uncle's supervillain business is more complicated than you might think. Particularly when you discover who's running the place. Charlie's life is going nowhere fast. A divorced substitute teacher living with his cat in a house his siblings want to sell, all he wants is to open a pub downtown, if only the bank will approve his loan. Then his long-lost uncle Jake dies and leaves his supervillain business (complete with island volcano lair) to Charlie. But becoming a supervillain isn't all giant laser death rays and lava pits.
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5 out of 5 stars
-
Volcanic Lairs, Death Rays & Cats… Oh My! 😼
- By C. White on 09-19-23
By: John Scalzi
-
Artemis
- By: Andy Weir
- Narrated by: Rosario Dawson
- Length: 8 hrs and 57 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall4.5 out of 5 stars 94,981
-
Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 86,929
-
Story4 out of 5 stars 86,727
Jazz Bashara is a criminal. Well, sort of. Life on Artemis, the first and only city on the moon, is tough if you're not a rich tourist or an eccentric billionaire. So smuggling in the occasional harmless bit of contraband barely counts, right? Not when you've got debts to pay and your job as a porter barely covers the rent. Everything changes when Jazz sees the chance to commit the perfect crime, with a reward too lucrative to turn down.
-
3 out of 5 stars
-
A ferrari with no motor
- By will on 11-18-17
By: Andy Weir
-
Fahrenheit 451
- By: Ray Bradbury
- Narrated by: Tim Robbins
- Length: 5 hrs and 1 min
- Unabridged
-
Overall4.5 out of 5 stars 32,795
-
Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 29,182
-
Story4.5 out of 5 stars 29,137
Guy Montag is a fireman. In his world, where television rules and literature is on the brink of extinction, firemen start fires rather than put them out. His job is to destroy the most illegal of commodities, the printed book, along with the houses in which they are hidden. Montag never questions the destruction and ruin his actions produce, returning each day to his bland life and wife, Mildred, who spends all day with her television "family."
-
4 out of 5 stars
-
Wish I Hadn't Cliff Noted This in High School
- By Joel on 03-27-17
By: Ray Bradbury
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2 out of 5 stars
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Love the story, but audio performance was not good at all
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an attempt at a fresh take fails
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I haven't been home for Christmas in eight years. That's about to change. This year, I'm traveling to my small hometown to convince my producer to make me the permanent host of Good Day Denver. The plan: Charm viewers by sharing my favorite family Christmas traditions and, in turn, get the likes, clicks, and shares to land the job. Not the plan: Run into my ex-boyfriend. In my house. For Christmas. Here he is, a guest of my mother, who apparently had more trouble letting go of Max Weber than I did.
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So Good! Very pure.
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This is my December. I’m not being naive or overly optimistic. I have it on good authority that this year, I will meet my soulmate and fall madly in love. The matchmaker who raised me said that it’ll happen by this Winter’s Solstice. Merry Christmas to me, right? Wrong. Because the man who just slid into my kitchen at midnight, unarmed me with his charming smile, and lit me up while licking frosting from my fingers is the newest investor in The TimeKeeper Inn. Gray Turner, the disgraced professional baseball player, wants to renovate and take over the place I call home.
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One moment, Susan Moore had a perfect life—a handsome husband, a fabulous career, wonderful friends, and a gorgeous home in Pacific Heights, San Francisco. The next minute, it was all gone. And Susan found herself in a straitjacket, locked in a padded room.
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Have a hard time with the main character
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Myrthe was born with the ability to turn her tears into wishes. But when a granted wish goes wrong, she is cursed: the next tear she sheds will kill her. She must travel to the Well to break the curse before it can claim her life—and before the king's militairen find her. To survive the journey, Myrthe must harden her heart to keep herself from crying even a single tear.
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Fantasy with a bit of Allegory
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I've always heard there's a fine line between love and hate. No one told me that line could destroy me. Noah Fontaine. King of the school. My living nightmare. The object of my fantasies. My new stepbrother. I did whatever it took to survive him. Every day he took more of me. I just didn't expect him to take my heart. Because of the boy I once hated, I'd never be the same girl again.
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The second half was better.
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Castle of Nevers and Nightmares
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Overall5 out of 5 stars 31
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Performance5 out of 5 stars 29
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Story5 out of 5 stars 29
When winter comes to the Court of Dreams, the war against the Subterranean of Nightmares freezes. To celebrate, the faerie queen holds a tournament where mortals compete for the prize of a dream come true. For outsider Willow Nightstalk, it's the only way to break the curse making her as ugly as she feels. But the deadly tournament has a darker purpose—to flush out flawed mortal blights on the perfectly pretty fae society… and to kill them.
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5 out of 5 stars
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Exceptional
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The Artificer's Apprentice
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Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 84
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Story4.5 out of 5 stars 84
How would you like to begin an apprenticeship in the mystical craft of artificery? You'll learn things that most people can only dream of. You'll make swords with self-sharpening blades, bows that fire by themselves, and clocks that can read the future. Even better, you'll get to live in the sunlit village of Sunhampton, a sleepy little crafter's village of cobbled streets, cozy taverns, and pleasant bakeries. If this sounds like just the life for you, then grab a beer and a sweet roll, and follow Lewis as he begins his new life as an apprentice.
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5 out of 5 stars
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Warm and Comfy
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The Heir of an Ancient Bloodline
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So you died a horrific death in your own world? No problem! Maybe you are exactly what an dying old mage needs to resurrect the princely line of the Morozov family. An old maniac sliced a couple of people to bits right before your eyes? Relax! Now he's your teacher, and he's going to guide you along through life. What? You've actually seen real demons? Huge, ten-foot-tall monsters wielding axes? Take a chill pill! They appear pretty frequently in unexpected places all over the world and wreak destruction.
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1 out of 5 stars
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Misled
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Overall5 out of 5 stars 9
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Performance5 out of 5 stars 9
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A pixie-infested farmhouse. A pain-in-the-butt familiar. A hunky lumberjack shifter. Not at all what a witch on the run like me expects to find in small-town Redbud, Indiana, but life’s been throwing me a bunch of curveballs lately. Most recently? Discovering a demonic curse on the family grimoire sucking the magic straight out of my coven’s hearts. 10 out of 10 do not recommend, and there’s only one thing an uninitiated witch like me can do.
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5 out of 5 stars
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An enjoyable series
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By: Kat Healy
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Triple-Duty Bodyguards
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Overall4.5 out of 5 stars 207
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Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 201
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Story4.5 out of 5 stars 201
As one of the world's most hated celebrities, I'm used to unwanted attention. But when I woke up one morning to find a mysterious man had broken into my house, I knew I needed security, fast. Enter "The Angels," my three ex-military bodyguards. Having three gorgeous men guarding me 24-7 sounds like a dream come true, but it turns out to be a nightmare. They're always here, watching me. Caring for me. Protecting me. They tell me to ignore them and go about my business, but I can't even think with them so close. The spark is too intense.
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2 out of 5 stars
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Moremance didn’t actually give more romance
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Song of the Fae
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Imogen, captain of the Irish charter boat, Mystic Pirate, has little time for friends and doesn’t trust her lovers. Perhaps the real issue is that she can’t trust herself, as she hasn’t yet found a good explanation for why otherworldly images dance before her eyes. Half-convinced that she is one step away from losing her mind, just like her mother, Imogen prefers to spend her life at sea with the only family she knows—her crew members.
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5 out of 5 stars
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Awesome as always!
- By Rebecca Swan-Byrd on 07-29-22
By: Tricia O'Malley
What listeners say about Welcome to Fae Cafe
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Overall3 out of 5 stars
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Performance4 out of 5 stars
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Story1 out of 5 stars
- Kindle Customer
- 10-05-23
loss of free will
I know it is only a story but damn Kate walking around acting like she an angel when she has stolen others free will and has gone as far as forcing one to kiss someone feet to make them like her agian. This just don't sit right with me. it wasn't a cozy story for me.
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2 people found this helpful
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Overall4 out of 5 stars
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Performance4 out of 5 stars
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Story4 out of 5 stars
- savanah skinner
- 03-07-24
The humor in this book 😂 loved it
If you like cozy, adorable, funny, and sometimes trickster fairytales… well you’re gonna love this ❤️
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Overall5 out of 5 stars
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Performance5 out of 5 stars
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Story5 out of 5 stars
- Kindle Customer
- 10-06-23
Fun, Cozy read
such a fun and cozy read! really enjoyed the story, and the funny antics of the fae assasins as they take on running thr Cafe :)
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Overall5 out of 5 stars
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Performance5 out of 5 stars
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Story5 out of 5 stars
- Sketchy_mc_doodles
- 04-08-24
they nearly killed me at the end when I thought that they had died!🤣😭
nothing! it was amazing!! I would love to recommend this book to others! love it!
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Overall5 out of 5 stars
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Performance5 out of 5 stars
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Story5 out of 5 stars
- LSnyder
- 09-03-24
Cute and light-hearted!
This was a fun fantasy story. It was an easy read and I enjoyed it after a slow start.
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Overall4 out of 5 stars
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Performance4 out of 5 stars
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Story4 out of 5 stars
- Styxx
- 03-13-24
it made me get attached to the characters
would of liked a little more romance but it was still good really liked the characters
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Overall5 out of 5 stars
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Performance5 out of 5 stars
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Story5 out of 5 stars
- Gretel Engel
- 09-23-24
Creative to the max
I loved the authors introduction of Fae to the “real” world. The obsession with chocolate chip cookies. It is a cozy read.
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Overall5 out of 5 stars
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Performance5 out of 5 stars
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Story4 out of 5 stars
- Danica
- 09-03-24
A good quick COZY read
Things were pretty much foreshadowed through the book making it easy to predict the plot line.
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Overall5 out of 5 stars
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Performance5 out of 5 stars
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Story5 out of 5 stars
- Jenni
- 10-05-23
Absolutely Adorable
This is possibly the cutest slice of life fantasy I’ve read. Perfect for when you’re in the mood for a light cozy read.
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Overall5 out of 5 stars
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Performance4 out of 5 stars
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Story5 out of 5 stars
- Tiffany Schwartz
- 09-27-24
Kate and the Prince
At first I wasn't sure if this was the book for me, but then I really got into the sarcastic tone and enjoyed it more and more. Kate Cole and Prince Cressica Alabastian really had it out for one another and listening as Kate really started to grasp what was happening in her life and to her was fabulous. Looking forward to the next one.
The one thing that kept bothering me tho was how on opening day Kate just left.. she also wasn't really there to run her cafe, which isn't how that works.
4.5 rounded up.
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