The Woman They Wanted
Shattering the Illusion of the Good Christian Wife
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Narrated by:
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Shannon Harris
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By:
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Shannon Harris
About this listen
As a twenty-three-year-old singer and the soon-to-be wife of youth pastor Joshua Harris, nothing in Shannon Harris's secular upbringing prepared her to enter the world of conservative Christianity. Soon Joshua's bestselling book I Kissed Dating Goodbye helped inspire a national purity movement, and Shannon's identity became "pastor's wife."
The Woman They Wanted recounts Shannon's remarkable experience inside Big Church—where she was asked to live within a narrow definition of womanhood for almost two decades—and her subsequent journey out of that world and into a more authentic version of herself. Entering conservative American Christianity was like being drawn out to sea, she writes, inexorable and all consuming. Slowly, her worldview was narrowed, her motivations questioned, her behavior examined, until she had been whittled down to an idealized version of femininity envisioned as an extension of her husband and the church. However, when Sovereign Grace Ministries fell apart due to leadership conflicts and Shannon found herself outside church circles for the first time in years, she heard her intuition calling to her again. As she began to shake off the fog of depression and confusion, that voice grew louder. In honoring it, she awakened to the realities in which she had been trapped and found her truest self.
©2023 Shannon Harris (P)2023 eChristianListeners also enjoyed...
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One day, Lori Gottlieb is a therapist who helps patients in her Los Angeles practice. The next, a crisis causes her world to come crashing down. Enter Wendell, the quirky but seasoned therapist in whose office she suddenly lands. With his balding head, cardigan, and khakis, he seems to have come straight from Therapist Central Casting. Yet he will turn out to be anything but.
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It was like a hallmark movie being waterboarded into my ears for 15 hours
- By Amazon Customer on 10-01-19
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You Will Not Recognize Your Life
- By: Micaela Blei
- Narrated by: Micaela Blei
- Length: 2 hrs and 48 mins
- Original Recording
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It’s 2006. After a string of rejections from men who tell her they could never, ever, ever see her “that way,” awkward third-grade teacher Micaela Blei signs up for a mysterious course called “The Divine Feminine,” and feels like she might have found the key to the perfect life. Turns out if you’re an A student, you can get an A in anything–including men. Pretty soon she’s learning to "conjure" her desires with vision boards, flirtations, and even a daring jumbotron viewing party for her, ahem ... "divine center."
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Couldn’t stop listening!
- By Amy R. Shearn on 12-13-24
By: Micaela Blei
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Going Infinite
- The Rise and Fall of a New Tycoon
- By: Michael Lewis
- Narrated by: Michael Lewis
- Length: 9 hrs and 35 mins
- Unabridged
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When Michael Lewis first met him, Sam Bankman-Fried was the world’s youngest billionaire and crypto’s Gatsby. CEOs, celebrities, and leaders of small countries all vied for his time and cash after he catapulted, practically overnight, onto the Forbes billionaire list. Who was this rumpled guy in cargo shorts and limp white socks, whose eyes twitched across Zoom meetings as he played video games on the side?
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really expected more rigor from Michael Lewis
- By Wowhello on 10-04-23
By: Michael Lewis
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Genghis Khan and the Making of the Modern World
- By: Jack Weatherford
- Narrated by: Jonathan Davis, Jack Weatherford
- Length: 14 hrs and 20 mins
- Unabridged
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The Mongol army led by Genghis Khan subjugated more lands and people in 25 years than the Romans did in 400. In nearly every country the Mongols conquered, they brought an unprecedented rise in cultural communication, expanded trade, and a blossoming of civilization.
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Golden Horde/Platinum Listen
- By Cynthia on 12-11-13
By: Jack Weatherford
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The Wonder of Stevie
- By: Wesley Morris
- Narrated by: Wesley Morris, Michelle Obama, Barack Obama, and others
- Length: 6 hrs and 10 mins
- Original Recording
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The year 1972 saw the beginning of a five-year span in which Stevie Wonder released five groundbreaking, critically acclaimed albums, garnering him more than half a dozen Grammys and more than 10 million albums sold, securing his place as one of the most important American musicians and songwriters in history. For the first time, uncover the untold story of an extraordinary artistic journey that shaped the greatest creative era in popular music history.
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Good but not great
- By Anonymous User on 09-14-24
By: Wesley Morris
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The Last Days of Cabrini-Green
- By: Ben Austen, Harrison David Rivers
- Narrated by: Ben Austen, Patina Miller, Harry Lennix, and others
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In 1992, the deadliest year in Chicago’s history, seven-year-old Dantrell Davis was shot and killed in front of his elementary school inside the public housing complex Cabrini-Green. What happened to Dantrell led to a truce among Chicago’s gangs, but it also ignited a national panic about poverty and violence in America’s cities. Dantrell’s name would soon be used to demolish all of Chicago’s high-rise public housing, displacing tens of thousands of low-income families.
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A Gripping and Necessary Work
- By booklover on 11-24-24
By: Ben Austen, and others
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Elvis and Me
- By: Priscilla Beaulieu Presley
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- Length: 7 hrs and 30 mins
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The inspiration for the major motion picture Priscilla directed by Sofia Coppola, this New York Times best seller reveals the intimate story of Elvis Presley and Priscilla Presley, told by the woman who lived it.
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What a story!
- By Pen Name on 08-28-22
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San Miguel Kidnappings
- By: Erick Galindo, Roger Vela
- Narrated by: Karla Souza
- Length: 4 hrs and 50 mins
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The close knit community in San Miguel de Allende Mexico was plagued by a string of sophisticated kidnappings for nearly a decade. When the police finally made an arrest the townspeople were shocked by who was accused of masterminding the criminal enterprise. It's everyone's favorite neighbor and a pillar of the community, Ramon Guerra. Except Ramon isn't who he says he is.
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Insightful
- By Tara on 12-11-24
By: Erick Galindo, and others
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Episodes
- The True Story of Two Friends & One Diagnosis
- By: Mara Altman, Kat Alexander
- Narrated by: Mara Altman, Kat Alexander
- Length: 7 hrs and 5 mins
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In Episodes, lifelong best friends Kat and Mara take listeners on an unfiltered journey through friendship, mental illness, and survival. Kat, a successful professional, is preparing for marriage and motherhood. On her fourth round of IVF, it happened—a frantic call to Mara. Mara comes over to find Kat, her friend of 25 years—the one who'd always been levelheaded, hilarious, and over-the-top thoughtful—trying to jump through a window.
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Just listen!
- By AJ on 11-17-24
By: Mara Altman, and others
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The Autobiography of Malcolm X
- As Told to Alex Haley
- By: Malcolm X, Alex Haley
- Narrated by: Laurence Fishburne
- Length: 16 hrs and 52 mins
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Experience a bold take on this classic autobiography as it’s performed by Oscar-nominated Laurence Fishburne. In this searing classic autobiography, originally published in 1965, Malcolm X, the Muslim leader, firebrand, and Black empowerment activist, tells the extraordinary story of his life and the growth of the Human Rights movement. His fascinating perspective on the lies and limitations of the American dream and the inherent racism in a society that denies its non-White citizens the opportunity to dream, gives extraordinary insight into the most urgent issues of our own time.
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it's Nearly perfect
- By Kerry on 09-16-20
By: Malcolm X, and others
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Flannery O'Connor and the Scandal of Faith
- By: Jessica Hooten Wilson, The Great Courses
- Narrated by: Jessica Hooten Wilson
- Length: 3 hrs and 5 mins
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Across six revealing lectures, Professor Jessica Hooten Wilson will introduce you to one of the 20th century’s most fascinating and divisive writers in Flannery O’Connor and the Scandal of Faith. Beginning with an overview of her brief but remarkable life, Professor Wilson will then take you through an exploration of themes in O’Connor’s work and the hallmarks of her literary style. You’ll get a clearer picture of O’Connor’s historical and geographical context while digging into how her stories can transcend time and place.
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The author reading her own book.
- By James T Casey on 12-16-24
By: Jessica Hooten Wilson, and others
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Evil Has a Name
- The Untold Story of the Golden State Killer Investigation
- By: Paul Holes, Jim Clemente, Peter McDonnell
- Narrated by: Paul Holes, Jim Clemente
- Length: 6 hrs and 13 mins
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For his victims, for their families and for the investigators tasked with finding him, the senselessness and brutality of the Golden State Killer's acts were matched only by the powerlessness they felt at failing to uncover his identity. Then, on April 24, 2018, authorities arrested 72-year-old Joseph James DeAngelo at his home in Citrus Heights, Calif., based on DNA evidence linked to the crimes. Amazingly, it seemed, evil finally had a name. Please note: This work contains descriptions of violent crime and sexual assault and may not be suitable for all listeners.
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Audible Raises The Bar On True Crime Genre
- By R. Squyres on 11-16-18
By: Paul Holes, and others
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"Biblical womanhood" is the idea that the Bible teaches God-ordained male leadership and female submission in the home and subordination in the church. Some say this hierarchy of authority is sufficiently evidenced by examples of male leadership (and lack of female leadership) in the Bible: the first human was male, Israel's official priests were male, most authors of Scripture were male, Jesus was male and chose twelve male Apostles. God is addressed as Father. Wives are commanded to submit to their husbands.
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"Don't tell" culture exposed
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Acclaimed author Karen Swallow Prior examines evangelical history, both good and bad. By analyzing the literature, art, and popular culture that has surrounded evangelicalism, she unpacks some of the movement's most deeply held concepts, ideas, values, and practices to consider what is Christian rather than merely cultural. The result is a clearer path forward for evangelicals amid their current identity crisis—and insight for others who want a deeper understanding of what the term "evangelical" means today.
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Fantastic Content, Unfortunate Narration
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Out of Focus
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When a mass shooter killed five people in an LGBTQ nightclub in Colorado Springs, grieving people graffitied James Dobson's Focus on the Family headquarters with the words "Their blood is on your hands." Such an accusation comes as no surprise to Amber Cantorna-Wylde, whose father is a Focus on the Family executive and cast Amber out of her family when she came out in 2012.
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Deeply Insightful
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Sex, God, and the Conservative Church
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As a psychotherapist and professor of marriage and family therapy and sexuality at a Christian University, Tina Schermer Sellers, PhD, has spent a career listening deeply to the often untold, most tightly held, shame-filled stories of people’s lives. Over the last 30 years in particular, these stories have revealed the devastating effects of abstinence education, the purity movement of the evangelical church, and the simultaneous removal of media regulations that allowed for an influx of sexual violence against women to enter all forms of commercial media beginning in the 1980s.
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Necessary reading
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What listeners say about The Woman They Wanted
Average customer ratingsReviews - Please select the tabs below to change the source of reviews.
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- Sandy Holt
- 11-18-23
Bitter sweet story.
I really enjoyed Shannon's honest sharing of her journey. I can see how it would be many women's story in some evangelical churches. I am thankful that my own experience has been one of freedom for women to share their gifts and talents and still be true to who they are. My own faith journey has been Full of ups and downs, Sweetness and pain. Failures and redemption. Always pursued by my savior Jesus and reminded how much he loves me, not my performance. Religion is not what Jesus has in mind for his daughters to
Bear as a Burden. The only thing that saddened me about the story was that in the end, Shannon was not sure She even believed there was a God. I'm glad she is free from The tyrant of religiosity. I am happy that her faith journey can now truly begin ... that Jesus always pursues us. I would be lost if he hadn't pursued me. I love you, Shannon.
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- Hope Wilson
- 01-01-24
A Must Read
Very clear and thoughtful examination of the trauma from church. Helpful in understanding how one might end up in a life never imagined.
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- "robynd"
- 09-10-24
Compelling, personal story
Because I come from a religiously conservative background, I found her story to be very relatable and interesting. It helped me to hear her personal story and the changes she made in her life to come into her own person. I’m glad she shared her story.
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Overall
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Performance
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- Maria Hauskins
- 05-05-24
The Strength of Women
I had an inkling of who Josh Harris was. I never grew up in Christian patriarchy or got involved as I grew up. I heard a review of this book on another podcast and was curious. I bought this book and I’m so glad I did! Shannon is a wonderful writer and she tells her story beautifully. You are with her as she looses herself in her marriage and this world of evangelical wife hood and woman hood and she brings the reader (or listener) with her in her journey of rediscovering her voice and her identify outside of her famous husband and the strict culture they were apart of. 100/10, this is a must read!
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- Jennifer F.
- 09-17-24
Loved the transparency of this book
Devoured this book! Couldn’t stop listening. Great read and transparency into the life of a mega church, pastor’s wife. Wow! Pretty amazing stuff.
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- Sheryl A.
- 11-27-23
Important wake up
Personal story of how an ultra conservative church pidgeon holes and disenfranchises women. rather than protecting peoples faith they push believers to a crisis of faith. Important memoir that answers most of the questions people have about this couple. Minus stars for literary style and reading.
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- Amazon Customer
- 12-30-23
The fruit of truth
Thank you for sharing your story and living courageously. This message needs to be spoken.
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- Anonymous User
- 10-26-24
Great look into extreme Evangelical Christianity
A riveting and enlightening description of what Shannon encountered in a cult like church. It is a clear warning of many pitfalls one might encounter in the church. Her words resonated so much for me, a deconstructing millenial with religious trauma.
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- Marissa Bond
- 05-03-24
It needed to be written
A necessary read for those of us still reckoning with the woman they wanted us to be. Thank you, Shannon.
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- Strohm
- 10-20-24
Truth spoken
Shannon does a beautiful job of capturing what many of us experienced growing up in a patriarchal church. So grateful the brave are speaking out.
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