The Secret Diaries of Miss Anne Lister: Vol. 1

I Know My Own Heart

By: Anne Lister, Helena Whitbread - editor

Narrated by: Kristin Atherton

Discover the extraordinary diaries of the real Anne Lister: the inspiration for Gentleman Jack and Emma Donoghue's novel Learned By Heart.

When this volume of Anne Lister's diaries was first published in 1988, it was hailed as a vital piece of lost lesbian history. The editor, Helena Whitbread, had spent years painstakingly researching and transcribing Lister's extensive journals, much of which were written in an elaborate code - what Lister called her 'crypthand', which allowed her to record her life in intimate, and at times, explicit, detail. Until then, Anne Lister's lesbianism had been supressed or hinted at; this was the first time her story had been told. Anne Lister defied the role of nineteenth century womanhood: she was bold, fiercely independent, a landowner, industrialist, traveller and lesbian - a woman who lived her life on her own terms.

These diaries include the years 1816-1824.

©2010 Helena Whitbread (P)2023 Hachette Audio UK

Critic reviews

'Engaging, revealing, at times simply astonishing.' Sarah Waters

'[Anne Lister's] sense of self, and self-awareness, is what makes her modern to us... The diaries gave me courage.' Jeanette Winterson

'The Lister diaries are the Dead Sea Scrolls of lesbian history.' Emma Donoghue

Her words are pure, honest, and brilliantly wrapped with a side of afternoon tea!

To Helena Whitbread (and many others) who spent countless hours transcribing her words, thank you! What a priceless gift you have given.
If you do not know Anne Lister, you should.

the challenges Anne faced in a society that did not accept same-sex relationships.

“The Secret Diaries of Miss Anne Lister" is a powerful and captivating book that delves into the life of Anne Lister, a remarkable woman who lived in the 1800s. I would like to express my gratitude to Helena Whitbread for her meticulous translation of Anne's secret code, which allowed us to explore Anne's lesbian relationships with various lovers.

This book sheds light on the challenges Anne faced in a society that did not accept same-sex relationships. It is heartbreaking to witness the lengths Anne had to go through to keep her relationships hidden from the world. Throughout the story, a mix of joy and sadness is evoked as Anne's longing for love and companionship becomes evident.

In the second part of the book, Anne finally finds true love with Ann Walker, but further details are revealed in the subsequent book, which I am yet to read. The emotions that Anne experiences resonate deeply within me, as I can feel her pain and solitude in longing for a genuine connection. The impact of her relationship with M, who chose to marry for financial reasons, is also explored, highlighting the manipulation and false hope Anne endured.

Anne's commitment to M put her life on hold, and she regretted not pursuing other relationships in the hope of a future with M. However, it becomes increasingly clear that M prioritized money and a certain lifestyle over Anne's love. The affair between them had a profound impact on Anne's life, and she referred M relationship with her husband as a form of legal prostitution.

What struck me most about Anne's story is the profound loneliness she experienced and her desperate need for true love. All she desired was to be loved and chosen by someone. It is disheartening to witness the restrictions placed on women during that time, where marriage was often their main goal and their aspirations were limited.

I refrain from revealing too much about the book, as I believe it is best experienced firsthand. However, there is a pivotal event that occurs, causing Anne's love and admiration for M to wane. This event leads to a shift in Anne's perspective, and she begins to question the nature of her relationship with M.

"The Secret Diaries of Miss Anne Lister" left me feeling both saddened by Anne's loneliness and inspired by her resilience. It is a powerful reminder of the importance of genuine love and acceptance. I highly recommend reading this book to truly appreciate Anne's journey.

I also want to mention that there is a second book that continues Anne's story, where Ann Walker play a big role in Anne's life and ultimately becomes Anne's wife. Additionally, there is a movie adaptation that I have yet to watch, but I plan to do so once I have read the second book.

I would like to express my gratitude to Helena Whitbread for her dedication in deciphering Anne's secret code, providing us with a valuable glimpse into the lives of lesbian and queer women during that time. I believe this book serves as a reminder that we should strive for a world where individuals can freely express their true selves and embrace their sexual orientation without fear of judgment or prejudice. This book also made me think about all the women who are afraid to be themselves and be with whom they want because they fear being judged by their family and friends for their attraction to women. I hope that one day these women can truly be themselves, find freedom, and align with their true sexual orientation. I hope they do not waste their lives and years with someone they do not love, unable to express their true sexual orientation due to fear of judgment. May these women find freedom and one day align with their true sexual orientation.