The Practice of Belonging

Six Lessons from Vibrant Communities to Combat Loneliness, Foster Diversity, and Cultivate Caring Relationships

By: Lisa Kentgen PhD

Narrated by: Lisa Kentgen PhD

An inspirational guide to the 6 core qualities of healthy communities, for anyone looking to build community as a source of connection and a vehicle for social change

After two years meeting with different communities in the US, psychologist Lisa Kentgen identified 6 key traits of vibrant, healthy communities that we can all apply to our own lives and networks:

• Commitment to care
• Acceptance
• Diversity
• Skillful conflict resolution
• Bonding rituals
• Hospitality

Each chapter focuses on one of these traits, highlighting a particular community as a case study of how it can be put into practice. You’ll learn about a wide range of successful community models, including a tiny-home village for people who had been chronically houseless in Austin, Texas; a study circle to build connection between Native and non-Native people in a small town in South Dakota; a 500-member community choir in Columbus, Ohio; and a Buddhist center in Barre, Massachusetts committed to bringing greater diversity to the Dharma.

Throughout the book, you’ll reflect: How can we cultivate these traits of vibrant community in our own lives? What would it look like to prioritize caring and acceptance in our interactions with others? How can we create a climate of true inclusivity, one where our differences both challenge and strengthen us? How can we learn to feel more comfortable with tension and acquire the skills to move through conflict toward creative solutions? What would happen if we incorporated meaningful rituals into our communities and made a point of celebrating each other?

With intention and practice, we can transform our social relationships and build communities that appreciate difference, encourage authentic expression, and foster an environment of belonging and mutual care. This book will inspire you to make the transformative leap from “me” to “we,” creating communal, loving spaces in which to connect—and thrive—together.

©2023 Lisa Kentgen (P)2023 North Atlantic Books

Critic reviews

“Building sustainable justice in the world requires telescoping from the personal to the interpersonal to the systemic with such frequency it can feel impossible. What a gift that The Practice of Belonging helps us do exactly that in ways that become fluid and even joy filled instead of terrifying. Kentgen’s book put me in mind of Leah Lakshmi Piepzna-Samarasinha’s book Care Work, and . . . gives me hope for the possibility of communities that aren't only just but are also delightful.” —Sandhya Jha, activist and author of Transforming Communities

“The Practice of Belonging is a uniquely powerful book. The author speaks profoundly of community's meaning and tells us where this possibility is occurring in the world right now . . . making the world we want to inhabit accessible to us. The insight of one chapter title, ‘The Vulnerable Help Us Shed Our Masks,’ is reason enough to embrace this book. There is a quiet and essentially unreported movement occurring in our local places, and this book and the way it is written hasten this along.” —Peter Block, author of Community

“Given our current climate of political and social divide, The Practice of Belonging could not come at a more needed time. Dr. Kentgen explores how we can solve our crisis of belonging and heal our unprecedented social and emotional pain. While traveling across the country and meeting with people who shared their experiences of their healthy communities, she discovered six qualities that all vibrant communities share and invites us to use these same qualities to build our own shared spaces of healthy belonging.” —Debra A. Harkins, professor of sociology and criminal justice at Suffolk University and author of Alongside Community