Ride or Die

A Feminist Manifesto for the Well-Being of Black Women

By: Shanita Hubbard

Narrated by: Tovah Ott

Cultural criticism and pop culture history intertwine in this important book, which dissects how hip hop has sidelined Black women's identity and emotional well-being.

Do you have a “ride or die chick” in your life? A “ride or die chick” is a Black woman who holds down her family and community. She’s that friend or family member that you can call up in the middle of the night to bail you out of jail, if ever needed, and you know she’ll show up and won’t ask any questions. She does anything for her family, friends, and significant other, even at the cost of her own well-being. “No” is not in her vocabulary. She’s beloved by you and many others, but her ride or die trope becomes a problem when she does it indiscriminately. Her self-worth is connected to how much labor she can provide for others. She goes above and beyond for everyone in every aspect of her life—work, family, church, and often it’s not reciprocated, and a “ride or die chick” doesn’t require it to be because she’s a “strong Black woman.” To her, love should be earned, and there’s no limit to what she’ll do for it.

In this book, author, adjunct professor of sociology, and former therapist, Shanita Hubbard disrupts the “ride or die” complex, and argues that this way of life has left Black women exhausted, overworked, overlooked, and feeling depleted. She suggests that Black women are to susceptible this mentality because it’s normalized in our culture. It rings loud in our favorite hip-hop songs, and it even shows up in the most important relationship we will ever have—the one with yourself.

Compassionate, candid, hard-hitting, and 100% unapologetic, Ride-or-Die melds Hubbard’s entertaining conversations with her Black girlfriends and her personal experiences as a redeemed “ride-or-die chick” and a former “captain of the build-a-brother team” to fervently dismantle cultural norms that require Black women to take care of everyone but themselves.

Ride or Die urges you to expel the myth that your self-worth is connected to how much labor you provide others, and guides you toward healing. Using hip hop as a backdrop to explore norms that are harmful to Black women, Hubbard shows the way you may be unknowingly perpetuating this harm within your relationships. Hubbard urges you to pull the plug on the “ride or die chick.”

©2022 Shanita Hubbard (P)2022 Legacy Lit

Hits Home

Shanita Hubbard uses popular songs from the hip hop era to color the commonly accepted perception that women are everything in their relationships with men even to their own detriment.

A Must Read

This book fills in all of the gaps. It eloquently allows readers see the full spectrum of what others authors on this topic have laid the ground work on. It is superior writing. It’s intellectually and stylistically superior.

Great Read

This book definitely called me in. I’m thankful to have read this and will reread to ensure I get all I can to be more consciously aware of the topics.

Soundtrack of my life

The subtle (and not so subtle) messages of hop hop music provides the framework for this book. This book spoke to me because those songs were the soundtrack of my life. The book covers a lot of ground, weaving the messages we received from music with how it might have shaped young girls' perceptions of themselves and relationships. So much resonated with me, but especially the chapter on applying restorative justice concepts to relationships and growth. Pretty sure I'll return to this book again and again.

A must read for black women everywhere

I’d recommend this book to young women, women needing to be heard and recognized. Women in the middle of divorce (like me), women who have been broken. And women who want to better understand themselves at the intersectionality of racial and gender oppression.

Well written and provocative

Shanita does a great job interweaving hip hop with her past and current worldview. I would have liked to hear solutions for black women shedding the label ride or die as a way forward. It’s a great read and will do well in academia also. Good narrator.

Great read

Enjoyed listening to this book. So insightful and informative of what it means to be a Black woman.

Intentional

I enjoyed the deposits and withdrawals in the writer’s relationships. Thank you for sharing ur journey.

Indifferent

I love the author’s writing the content felt a bit all over the place. Some points landed but there were too many different issues discussed.

Loved it!

Opens my eyes and made me look differently at the world. It’s a must read!