No Country for Old Gnomes
The Tales of Pell, Book 2
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No Country for Old Gnomes
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Narrated by:
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Luke Daniels
About this listen
Go big or go gnome. The New York Times best-selling authors of Kill the Farm Boy welcome you to the world of Pell, the irreverent fantasy universe that recalls Monty Python and Terry Pratchett.
"A complete delight, as fluffy and fun as The Lego Movie and as heartfelt as Harry Potter and the Sorcerer’s Stone." (Locus)
War is coming, and it’s gonna be Pell.
On one side stand the gnomes: smol, cheerful, possessing tidy cardigans and no taste for cruelty.
On the other side sit the halflings, proudly astride their war alpacas, carrying bags of grenades and hungry for a fight. And pretty much anything else.
It takes only one halfling bomb, and Offi Numminen’s world is turned upside-down - or downside-up, really, since he lives in a hole in the ground. His goth cardigans and aggressive melancholy set him apart from the other gnomes, as does his decision to fight back against their halfling oppressors. Suddenly Offi is the leader of a band of lovable misfits and outcasts - from a gryphon who would literally kill for omelets to a young dwarf herbalist who is better with bees than with his cudgel to an assertive and cheerful teen witch with a beard as long as her book of curses - all on a journey to the Toot Towers to confront the dastardly villain intent on tearing Pell asunder. These adventurers never fit in anywhere else, but as they become friends, fight mermaids, and get really angry at this one raccoon, they learn that there’s nothing more heroic than being yourself.
In No Country for Old Gnomes, Delilah S. Dawson and Kevin Hearne lovingly tweak the tropes of fantasy and fairy tales. Here you’ll find goofy jokes and whimsical puns, but you’ll also find a diverse, feminist, and lighthearted approach to fantasy that will bring a smile to your face and many fine cheeses to your plate.
©2019 Kevin Hearne and Delilah S. Dawson (P)2019 Random House AudioListeners also enjoyed...
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Critic reviews
“Hilarious...Dawson and Hearne present another puntastic adventure set in the universe of their Tales of Pell series [with] laugh-out-loud trials, tribulations, and wanderings of a completely new band of endearing eccentrics.” (Booklist)
“No Country For Old Gnomes is good fun, full of laughs, clever details, and characters...in whom you may see a little of yourself.” (Elitist Book Reviews)
“[A] hilarious new fantasy comedy.” (Bustle)
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- By Angela Briggs on 07-25-19
By: Madeleine Roux
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Tales of the Great Beasts (Spirit Animals: Special Edition)
- By: Brandon Mull
- Narrated by: Nicola Barber
- Length: 5 hrs and 3 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall4.5 out of 5 stars 117
-
Performance5 out of 5 stars 93
-
Story4.5 out of 5 stars 92
Long before they were spirit animals, the four were still legends - Great Beasts, the most powerful beings to roam the wilds of Erdas. Aided by a brave resistance of humans and animals, they gave their lives to protect the world from a threat more dangerous than any it had seen before: their own kind. Wise and cunning, gentle and ruthless, these are tales of the true heroes and villains in the war that started it all.
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5 out of 5 stars
-
review from 9 y/o daughter
- By Ellie on 01-08-17
By: Brandon Mull
-
The Fairy Godmother
- Tales of the Five Hundred Kingdoms, Book 1
- By: Mercedes Lackey
- Narrated by: Gabra Zackman
- Length: 12 hrs and 59 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall4.5 out of 5 stars 1,483
-
Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 1,329
-
Story4.5 out of 5 stars 1,342
Elena Klovis was supposed to be her kingdom's Cinderella - until an accident of fate left her with a completely inappropriate prince! Determined not to remain with her stepfamily, Elena set out to get a new job - and ended up becoming the Fairy Godmother for the land. But "Breaking with Tradition" was no easy matter. True, she didn't have to sleep in the chimney, but she had to deal with arrogant, stuffed-shirt princes who kept trying to rise above their place in the tale.
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5 out of 5 stars
-
An excellent start to a new series
- By Captain Skurvy on 01-16-13
By: Mercedes Lackey
-
The Dragons of Chiril
- A Novel
- By: Donita K. Paul
- Narrated by: Tanya Eby
- Length: 12 hrs and 8 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall4.5 out of 5 stars 60
-
Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 52
-
Story4.5 out of 5 stars 55
Tipper has been caring for her family’s estate for years now, ever since her father disappeared, making a living by selling off his famous artwork. Then she learns that three statues she sold were carved from an ancient foundation stone, and the fabric of her reality is crumbling. She must free her father and save the world. But she can’t do it alone....
-
3 out of 5 stars
-
Wish they would keep the same narrator
- By Amanda Bagley on 12-11-20
By: Donita K. Paul
-
The Infernal City
- Elder Scrolls Series #1
- By: Greg Keyes
- Narrated by: Michael Page
- Length: 8 hrs and 27 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall4.5 out of 5 stars 1,180
-
Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 1,083
-
Story4.5 out of 5 stars 1,081
Four decades after the Oblivion Crisis, Tamriel is threatened anew by an ancient and all-consuming evil. It is Umbriel, a floating city that casts a terrifying shadow-for wherever it falls, people die and rise again. And it is in Umbriel's shadow that a great adventure begins and a group of unlikely heroes meet. A legendary prince with a secret. A spy on the trail of a vast conspiracy. A mage obsessed with his desire for revenge. And Annaïg, a young girl in whose hands the fate of Tamriel may rest.
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5 out of 5 stars
-
Umbriel is coming
- By Brenden Zapp on 02-01-13
By: Greg Keyes
-
The Hero's Guide to Saving Your Kingdom
- By: Christopher Healy, Todd Harris
- Narrated by: Bronson Pinchot
- Length: 9 hrs and 4 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall4.5 out of 5 stars 1,138
-
Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 1,018
-
Story4.5 out of 5 stars 1,016
Prince Liam. Prince Frederic. Prince Duncan. Prince Gustav. You've never heard of them, have you? These are the princes who saved Sleeping Beauty, Cinderella, Snow White, and Rapunzel, respectively, and yet, thanks to those lousy bards who wrote the tales, you likely know them only as Prince Charming. But all of this is about to change.
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5 out of 5 stars
-
Warning Gushing Ahead……..
- By MissSusie66 on 05-27-12
By: Christopher Healy, and others
-
House of Furies
- By: Madeleine Roux
- Narrated by: Billie Fulford-Brown
- Length: 8 hrs and 36 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall4.5 out of 5 stars 162
-
Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 143
-
Story4.5 out of 5 stars 144
After escaping a harsh school where punishment was the lesson of the day, 17-year-old Louisa Ditton is thrilled to find employment as a maid at a boardinghouse. But soon after her arrival at Coldthistle House, Louisa begins to realize that the house's mysterious owner, Mr. Morningside, is providing much more than lodging for his guests. Far from a place of rest, the house is a place of judgment, and Mr. Morningside and his unusual staff are meant to execute their own justice on those who are past being saved.
-
2 out of 5 stars
-
One of the characters is Satan..lots of the occult
- By Angela Briggs on 07-25-19
By: Madeleine Roux
-
The Bitches of Everafter
- The Everafter Series, Book 1
- By: Barbra Annino
- Narrated by: Erin Fossa
- Length: 7 hrs and 24 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall4 out of 5 stars 303
-
Performance4 out of 5 stars 276
-
Story4 out of 5 stars 278
These are not the mild-mannered maidens of your childhood. These are fallen princesses and fierce women with no recollection of who they are, where they came from, or how they arrived in a mysterious town called Everafter. All they know is that they've been sentenced to a stretch in a half-way house by a malicious judge with an ax to grind. They've been stripped of their freedom, their kingdoms, and their true loves. Now, they have nothing left to lose.
-
1 out of 5 stars
-
Good Idea, Bad execution
- By A.J. Amendolara on 04-26-15
By: Barbra Annino
-
The Fate's Forsaken Omnibus
- Books 1-2 and Prequel Novella
- By: Shae Ford
- Narrated by: Derek Perkins
- Length: 37 hrs and 58 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall4.5 out of 5 stars 1,694
-
Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 1,570
-
Story4.5 out of 5 stars 1,563
Books 1, 2, and the prequel novella of the Fate's Forsaken series. The series follows the adventures of Kael: a young man who is thrust from his home in the Unforgivable Mountains and onto a hero's path. The journey is long, the battles are fierce - nearly all of his companions are outlaws. And Kael's rotten bad luck seems to make everything worse. This is his story.
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4 out of 5 stars
-
Fantasy with light romance
- By Skipper on 09-23-15
By: Shae Ford
-
The Cabinet of Wonders
- The Kronos Chronicles: Book I
- By: Marie Rutkoski
- Narrated by: Lorelei King
- Length: 7 hrs and 9 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall4.5 out of 5 stars 82
-
Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 63
-
Story4.5 out of 5 stars 63
Petra Kronos has a simple, happy life. But it's never been ordinary. She has a pet tin spider named Astrophil who likes to hide in her snarled hair and give her advice. Her best friend can trap lightning inside a glass sphere. Petra also has a father in faraway Prague who is able to move metal with his mind. Petra's life is forever changed when, one day, her father returns home - blind.
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3 out of 5 stars
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It was okay
- By Robbin Sutherland on 05-29-12
By: Marie Rutkoski
-
The Frog Princess
- By: E. D. Baker
- Narrated by: Katherine Kellgren
- Length: 5 hrs and 18 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall4.5 out of 5 stars 372
-
Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 237
-
Story4.5 out of 5 stars 238
Princess Emma will do just about anything to get out of marrying the self-centered Prince Jorge. So when she meets a frog named Eadric who claims, of course, to be a prince, she decides to give him a kiss and see what happens. Bad idea. The frog stays a frog, and worse still, Emma turns into a frog herself. It turns out only the person who cast the spell can break it, so Emma and Eadric are soon hopping along trying to find the witch who can make them human again.
-
5 out of 5 stars
-
Enjoyable for the whole family
- By Queenoid on 11-08-06
By: E. D. Baker
-
Castle Hangnail
- By: Ursula Vernon
- Narrated by: Tara Sands
- Length: 7 hrs and 38 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall5 out of 5 stars 176
-
Performance5 out of 5 stars 159
-
Story4.5 out of 5 stars 156
When Molly shows up on Castle Hangnail's doorstep to fill the vacancy for a wicked witch, the castle's minions are understandably dubious. After all, she is 12 years old, barely five feet tall, and quite polite. (The minions are used to tall, demanding evil sorceresses with razor-sharp cheekbones.) But the castle desperately needs a master, or else the Board of Magic will decommission it, leaving all the minions without the home they love.
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4 out of 5 stars
-
A great romp you shouldn't leave to just the kids
- By Elisabeth Carey on 02-08-16
By: Ursula Vernon
-
DragonSpell
- DragonKeeper Chronicles, Book 1
- By: Donita K. Paul
- Narrated by: Ellen Grafton
- Length: 11 hrs and 11 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall4.5 out of 5 stars 342
-
Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 280
-
Story4.5 out of 5 stars 284
Once a slave girl in the village of River Away, Kale is freed when she discovers a dragon's egg. She is given the unexpected opportunity to journey to the great walled city of Vendala to become a servant to Paladin. Yet this young girl has much to learn about the difference between slavery and service.
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5 out of 5 stars
-
I'm Enthralled by Donita K. Paul & Audible Books!
- By Sharri Lorraine on 09-21-11
By: Donita K. Paul
-
Enchanted
- The Woodcutter Sisters, Book 1
- By: Alethea Kontis
- Narrated by: Katherine Kellgren
- Length: 7 hrs and 46 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall4 out of 5 stars 603
-
Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 559
-
Story4 out of 5 stars 551
It isn’t easy being Sunday’s child, not when you’re the rather overlooked and unhappy youngest sibling to sisters named for the other six days of the week. Sunday’s only comfort is writing stories, although what she writes has a terrible tendency to come true. When Sunday meets an enchanted frog who asks about her stories, the two become friends. Soon that friendship deepens into something magical. One night, Sunday kisses her frog goodbye and leaves, not realizing that her love has transformed him....
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5 out of 5 stars
-
Charming... Enchanting
- By The Gabbards on 07-03-12
By: Alethea Kontis
-
Tess of the Road
- By: Rachel Hartman
- Narrated by: Katharine Lee McEwan
- Length: 16 hrs and 15 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall4.5 out of 5 stars 576
-
Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 527
-
Story4.5 out of 5 stars 528
In the medieval kingdom of Goredd, women are expected to be ladies, men are their protectors, and dragons can be whomever they choose. Tess is none of these things. Tess is...different. She speaks out of turn, has wild ideas, and can't seem to keep out of trouble. Then Tess goes too far. Tess's family decide the only path for her is a nunnery. But on the day she is to join the nuns, Tess chooses a different path for herself. She cuts her hair, pulls on her boots, and sets out on a journey. She's not running away, she's running towards something.
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4 out of 5 stars
-
Beautiful and Boring, Both.
- By Ryan on 04-05-19
By: Rachel Hartman
-
Storybound
- By: Marissa Burt
- Narrated by: Elizabeth Evans
- Length: 9 hrs and 2 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall4 out of 5 stars 240
-
Performance4 out of 5 stars 198
-
Story4 out of 5 stars 201
When Una Fairchild stumbles upon a mysterious book buried deep in the basement of her school library, she thinks nothing of opening the cover and diving in. But instead of paging through a regular novel, Una suddenly finds herself Written In to the land of Story - a world filled with Heroes and Villains and fairy-tale characters. But not everything in Story is as magical as it seems. Una must figure out why she has been Written In - and fast - before anyone else discovers her secret. Together with her new friend Peter and a talking cat named Sam, Una digs deep into Story's shadowy past.
-
3 out of 5 stars
-
Okay story about wandering into a fairy tale
- By Karissa Eckert on 11-13-14
By: Marissa Burt
-
Oz Reimagined
- New Tales from the Emerald City and Beyond
- By: Douglas Cohen - editor, John Joseph Adams - editor
- Narrated by: Nick Podehl, Tanya Eby
- Length: 10 hrs and 30 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall4 out of 5 stars 76
-
Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 71
-
Story4 out of 5 stars 72
When L. Frank Baum introduced Dorothy and friends to the American public in 1900, The Wonderful Wizard of Oz became an instant, best-selling hit. Today the whimsical tale remains a cultural phenomenon that continues to spawn wildly popular books, movies, and musicals. Now, editors John Joseph Adams and Douglas Cohen have brought together leading fantasy writers such as Orson Scott Card and Jane Yolen to create the ultimate anthology for Oz fans.
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4 out of 5 stars
-
The Many Faces of Dorothy or Dot
- By Jim "The Impatient" on 07-19-14
By: Douglas Cohen - editor, and others
-
The Book of Magic
- By: Gardner Dozois - editor, Scott Lynch, Elizabeth Bear, and others
- Narrated by: Karissa Vacker, Sile Bermingham, Maxwell Caulfield, and others
- Length: 24 hrs and 38 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall4 out of 5 stars 179
-
Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 163
-
Story4 out of 5 stars 162
Hot on the heels of Gardner Dozois's acclaimed anthology The Book of Swords comes this companion volume devoted to magic. How could it be otherwise? For every Frodo, there is a Gandalf... and a Saruman. For every Dorothy, a Glinda... and a Wicked Witch of the West. What would Harry Potter be without Albus Dumbledore... and Severus Snape? Figures of wisdom and power, possessing arcane, often forbidden knowledge, wizards and sorcerers are shaped - or misshaped - by the potent magic they seek to wield.
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4 out of 5 stars
-
some stinkers mostly good
- By M.T. on 12-11-18
By: Gardner Dozois - editor, and others
-
The Luck Uglies
- By: Paul Durham
- Narrated by: Fiona Hardingham
- Length: 8 hrs and 24 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall4.5 out of 5 stars 163
-
Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 143
-
Story4.5 out of 5 stars 142
Strange things are happening in Village Drowning, and a terrifying encounter has 11-year-old Rye O'Chanter convinced that the monstrous, supposedly extinct Bog Noblins have returned. Now Rye's only hope is an exiled secret society so notorious its name can't be spoken aloud: The Luck Uglies. As Rye dives into Village Drowning's maze of secrets, rules, and lies, she'll discover the truth behind the village's legends of outlaws and beasts…and that it may take a villain to save them from the monsters.
-
5 out of 5 stars
-
Wonderful story
- By Elicia on 07-05-16
By: Paul Durham
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Exiled from the Silverwood and the people she loves, Mae has few illusions about ever returning to her home. But when she comes across three out-of-place strangers in her wanderings, she finds herself contemplating the unthinkable: risking death to help a deposed queen regain her throne. And if anyone can help Mona Alastaire of Lumen Lake, it is a former Woodwalker - a ranger whose very being is intimately tied to the woods they are sworn to protect.
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5 out of 5 stars
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Finally on Audible!
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Dragons of Fate
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A clash of powerful magical forces sets off the Graygem of Gargath, sending Destina Rosethorn and her companions deeper into the past than she intended—to the age of Huma Dragonsbane and the Third Dragon War. Now, with the Device of Time Journeying shattered, they must find another way back to their own era before the Graygem irrevocably alters history and the Third Dragon War ends in defeat for the forces of good.
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4 out of 5 stars
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High in his attic bedroom, 12-year-old David mourns the loss of his mother. He is angry and he is alone, with only the books on his shelf for company.But those books have begun to whisper to him in the darkness, and as he takes refuge in the myths and fairytales so beloved of his dead mother, he finds that the real world and the fantasy world have begun to meld. The Crooked Man has come, with his mocking smile and his enigmatic words: "Welcome, your majesty. All hail the new king."
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High in his attic bedroom, 12-year-old David mourns the loss of his mother. He is angry and he is alone, with only the books on his shelf for company.But those books have begun to whisper to him in the darkness, and as he takes refuge in the myths and fairytales so beloved of his dead mother, he finds that the real world and the fantasy world have begun to meld. The Crooked Man has come, with his mocking smile and his enigmatic words: "Welcome, your majesty. All hail the new king."
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London, 1923. Newly minted research assistant Saffron Everleigh is the first woman to hold the position at University College of London. When she attends a dinner party for the school, she expects to engage in conversations about the university's large expedition to the Amazon. What she doesn’t expect is for Mrs. Henry, one of the professors’ wives, to drop to the floor, poisoned by an unknown toxin. Dr. Maxwell, Saffron’s mentor, is the main suspect, and evidence quickly mounts.
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Clean cozy mystery
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The port city of Hainak is alive: its buildings, its fashion, even its weapons. But, after a devastating war and a sweeping biotech revolution, all its inhabitants want is peace, no one more so than Yat Jyn-Hok, a reformed-thief-turned-cop who patrols the streets at night. Yat has recently been demoted on the force due to “lifestyle choices” after being caught at a gay club. She’s barely holding it together. When she stumbles across a dead body on her patrol, two fellow officers gruesomely murder her and dump her into the harbor. Unfortunately for them, she wakes up.
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LOVE the creativity
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Story4.5 out of 5 stars 68
Running to Summerpoint to avoid my failed love life may have seemed drastic, but I'd just inherited a house from a distant relative. The timing was perfect, almost like magic. But the cottage is in need of repairs, the place is in the middle of a forest, and I'm not used to small towns. Then I meet my new contractors. Sexy doesn't begin to describe them. The flirting flows easily, and while they're a well-established couple, it seems they may have room for more. Even better, these guys are quickly getting to be a lot more than just friends.
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2 out of 5 stars
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lack of plot
- By Meghan on 01-19-25
By: Auryn Hadley
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School for Psychics, Book 1
- By: K.C. Archer
- Narrated by: Madeleine Maby
- Length: 11 hrs and 27 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall4 out of 5 stars 1,504
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Performance4 out of 5 stars 1,381
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Story4 out of 5 stars 1,379
Teddy Cannon isn’t your typical 20-something woman. She’s resourceful. She’s bright. She’s scrappy. She can also read people with uncanny precision. What she doesn’t realize: She’s actually psychic. When a series of bad decisions leads Teddy to a run-in with the police, a mysterious stranger intervenes. He invites her to apply to the School for Psychics, a facility hidden off the coast of San Francisco where students are trained like Delta Force operatives: It’s competitive, cutthroat, and highly secretive.
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5 out of 5 stars
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From fun to addictive
- By Mia on 04-17-18
By: K.C. Archer
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Hollow Kingdom
- By: Kira Jane Buxton
- Narrated by: Robert Petkoff
- Length: 10 hrs and 11 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall4.5 out of 5 stars 1,923
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Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 1,687
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Story4.5 out of 5 stars 1,688
S.T., a domesticated crow, is a bird of simple pleasures: hanging out with his owner Big Jim, trading insults with Seattle's wild crows (i.e. "those idiots"), and enjoying the finest food humankind has to offer: Cheetos®. Then Big Jim's eyeball falls out of his head, and S.T. starts to think something isn't quite right. Even the slobbering affection of Big Jim's loyal but dim-witted dog, Dennis, fails to cure Big Jim's debilitating malady. S.T. is left with no choice but to abandon his old life and venture out into a wild and frightening new world with his trusty steed Dennis.
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5 out of 5 stars
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Original, Funny, Unputdownable
- By Victor @ theAudiobookBlog dot com on 05-08-20
By: Kira Jane Buxton
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Forged by Iron
- Olaf's Saga, Book 1
- By: Eric Schumacher
- Narrated by: Gildart Jackson
- Length: 9 hrs and 58 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall4.5 out of 5 stars 15
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Performance5 out of 5 stars 15
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Story4.5 out of 5 stars 15
Norway, AD 958. The Northern realm is once again at war. The exiled sons of Erik Bloodaxe have returned with the help of the Danes and have slain King Hakon. They now come for Hakon's heir, Jarl Trygvi. Trygvi's wife, Astrid, and young son, Olaf, flee their home with the aid of their household warriors. Pursued by the Bloodaxe brood, the family escapes east, through the dark, forested land of the Swedes and across the treacherous East Sea.
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3 out of 5 stars
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Old narrator voices young boy
- By Maxwell on 03-08-25
By: Eric Schumacher
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Three Kinds of Lucky
- The Shadow Age, Book 1
- By: Kim Harrison
- Narrated by: Marguerite Gavin
- Length: 15 hrs and 38 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall4.5 out of 5 stars 578
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Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 534
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Story4.5 out of 5 stars 534
Petra Grady has known since adolescence that she has no talent for magic—and that’s never going to change. But as a sweeper first-class, she’s parlayed her rare ability to handle dross—the damaging, magical waste generated by her more talented kin’s spellwork—into a decent life working at the mages’ university. Except Grady’s relatively predictable life is about to be upended.
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4 out of 5 stars
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Cool... But
- By G. Schmidt on 03-18-24
By: Kim Harrison
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The Voyage of the Jerle Shannara: Ilse Witch
- The Voyage of the Jerle Shannara, Book 1
- By: Terry Brooks
- Narrated by: Raphael Corkhill
- Length: 17 hrs and 39 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall5 out of 5 stars 326
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Performance5 out of 5 stars 290
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Story5 out of 5 stars 288
When a half-drowned elf is found floating in the seas of the Blue Divide, an old mystery resurfaces. Thirty years ago, an elven prince led an expedition in search of a legendary magic said to be more powerful than any in the world. Of all those who set out on that ill-fated voyage, not one has ever returned. Until now. The rescued elf carries a map covered with mysterious symbols - and Walker Boh, the last of the Druids, has the skill to decipher them.
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5 out of 5 stars
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Talk about memories
- By jose on 11-25-21
By: Terry Brooks
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Among Thieves
- By: M. J. Kuhn
- Narrated by: Zoe Mills
- Length: 10 hrs
- Unabridged
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Overall4.5 out of 5 stars 111
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Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 103
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Story4.5 out of 5 stars 103
In just over a year’s time, Ryia Cautella has already earned herself a reputation as the quickest, deadliest blade in the dockside city of Carrowwick - not to mention the sharpest tongue. But Ryia Cautella is not her real name. For the past six years, a deadly secret has kept her in hiding, running from town to town, doing whatever it takes to stay one step ahead of the formidable Guildmaster - the sovereign ruler of the five kingdoms of Thamorr. No matter how far or fast she travels, his servants never fail to track her down...but even the most powerful men can be defeated.
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4 out of 5 stars
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Back alleys & backstabbing = bollicking good times
- By 🔥 Phx17 🔥 on 07-17-22
By: M. J. Kuhn
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Spellmonger
- Spellmonger, Book 1
- By: Terry Mancour
- Narrated by: John Lee
- Length: 18 hrs and 22 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall4.5 out of 5 stars 14,463
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Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 13,009
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Story4.5 out of 5 stars 12,975
Minalan gave up a promising career as a professional warmage to live the quiet life of a village spellmonger in the remote mountain valley of Boval. It was a peaceful, beautiful little fief, far from the dangerous feudal petty squabbles of the Five Duchies, on the world of Callidore. There were cows. Lots of cows. And cheese. For six months things went well: He found a quaint little shop, he befriended the local lord, the village folk loved him, he found a sharp young apprentice to help out, and, best yet, he met a comely young widow with the prettiest eyes.
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5 out of 5 stars
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Terrific Book! A great adult fantasy series.
- By Eric on 07-27-17
By: Terry Mancour
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A Lady's Guide to Mischief and Mayhem
- By: Manda Collins
- Narrated by: Mary Jane Wells
- Length: 7 hrs and 36 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall4.5 out of 5 stars 1,342
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Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 1,214
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Story4.5 out of 5 stars 1,211
England, 1865: Newspaper columnist Lady Katherine Bascomb finds herself the subject of speculation when her latest article leads to an arrest in the murders plaguing London. The English believe women ought not to write about such vulgar things as crime, and a particularly attractive detective inspector is incensed that she's interfered with his investigation. To escape her sudden notoriety, Katherine heads to the country - only to witness a murder upon her arrival.
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3 out of 5 stars
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Adult Romance +18 read
- By CuteAsADaisy on 02-07-22
By: Manda Collins
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Pinquickle's Folly
- The Buccaneers (DemonWars: The Buccaneers, Book 1)
- By: R. A. Salvatore
- Narrated by: Simon Vance
- Length: 10 hrs and 59 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall4.5 out of 5 stars 65
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Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 62
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Story4.5 out of 5 stars 62
The first adventure in the Buccaneers trilogy begins in the free sea outside of the control of the usurping Xoconai empire, where the dwarven powrie pirates and merchants sail. But the golden-skinned Xoconai have begun to encroach upon these waters behind the rapacious attacks of the frigate Crocodile, helmed by Captain Aketz. But when forced to submit, these sailors choose to live, free to do as they please, without some fool or another pretending to hold power over them.
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1 out of 5 stars
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Pinquickles folly?
- By Remluf on 03-18-25
By: R. A. Salvatore
What listeners say about No Country for Old Gnomes
Highly rated for:
Reviews - Please select the tabs below to change the source of reviews.
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Overall5 out of 5 stars
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Performance5 out of 5 stars
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Story5 out of 5 stars
- Erin Koepplinger
- 05-01-19
Fantastical tale!
Another knock-it-out-of-park collaboration between Kevin and Luke. A great story brought to life by the narration. I was sad when it ended. A++++
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Overall5 out of 5 stars
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Performance5 out of 5 stars
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Story5 out of 5 stars
- Necdoo
- 04-15-24
No Country for Old Gnomes - audible
The plot was interesting. The characters are well developed and likable. Even the bad ones are interesting. The author mixes in some humor. The narrator did a wonderful job. Overall, a great book. I look forward to the authors next book.
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Overall5 out of 5 stars
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Performance5 out of 5 stars
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Story5 out of 5 stars
- Joshua Buster
- 05-23-24
fun and funny
I really enjoyed "Kill the Farm boy", but this was genuinely better in every way.
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Overall5 out of 5 stars
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Performance5 out of 5 stars
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Story5 out of 5 stars
- zoe
- 11-15-24
Excellent listen. If you love to laugh you need this book.
Made me laugh so hard. Definitely my new favorite authors. Can't wait to see whats next.
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Overall5 out of 5 stars
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Performance5 out of 5 stars
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Story5 out of 5 stars
- Brandi
- 01-02-20
only 5 stars
the worst part is that I can only give this narrator 5 stars. He brought this fun and engaging story to life like no one else could.
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Overall5 out of 5 stars
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Performance5 out of 5 stars
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Story5 out of 5 stars
- LinZ
- 01-03-22
Fun, Clever Writing
Apparently this is the type of humor I like! There were times I was literally rolling on the floor laughing. The references and play-on-words is a load of fun! I appreciate cleaver writing like that! Can get a bit crude at times, but not as bad as I thought it would be from other reviews (or maybe I'm just desensitized, I don't know).
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Overall5 out of 5 stars
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Performance5 out of 5 stars
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Story5 out of 5 stars
- Andrea
- 07-29-22
What I needed in 2022
All three books in this series are something I have read At least once a year since I found them - the pins, the fantasy, the inclusivity it is all so well done and fresh - please write more together and thank you for these books ❤️❤️❤️❤️
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Overall5 out of 5 stars
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Performance5 out of 5 stars
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Story5 out of 5 stars
- Erica L. Jones-Revilla
- 05-23-24
Another great!
They did it again! Perfect narration, thoroughly entertaining story, the works! Do yourself a favor and take some time to enjoy this book and this series.
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Overall5 out of 5 stars
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Performance5 out of 5 stars
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Story5 out of 5 stars
- Capt. Insano
- 02-28-25
Great humor with a good story.
A fantastic continuation of the Tales of Pell. Luke Daniels is a great narrator, and the voices were amazing!
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Overall5 out of 5 stars
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Performance5 out of 5 stars
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Story5 out of 5 stars
- Aleysha
- 04-26-19
fun and full of sillyness
I enjoyed this book. It is very well writen and the story and characters are engaging and Luke Daniels reads it beautifully. It is light funny and enjoyable. It made me chortle a few times and it It even made me cry a bit.
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1 person found this helpful