Let's F*cking Visit Illinois
Updated 2023 Travel Edition
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Let's F*cking Visit Illinois
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Narrated by:
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Caleb McBride
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By:
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Matthew Fish
About this listen
A completely satirical guide to the great corn prairie state of Illinois. What starts off as an idiotic and darkly humorous travel guide slowly devolves into the realm of horror for both the travel guide and his family.
During their travels through the cities and parks detailed in the guidebook, they begin to encounter an unknown darkness, absurd and unusual rituals, and a great evil that lurks behind the countless miles of cornfields in Illinois.
Learn about Illinois's great (entirely made up) history, visit its grossly inaccurate cities, and learn absolutely nothing about its many wonderful parks. A work of very dark comedy, this will provide you with absolutely no useful information about Illinois. Have a great trip!
©2023 Matthew Fish (P)2023 Matthew FishListeners also enjoyed...
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- Deep Travels Through Japan's Food Culture (Roads & Kingdoms Presents, Book 1)
- By: Matt Goulding
- Narrated by: Will Damron
- Length: 7 hrs and 49 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall4.5 out of 5 stars 58
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Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 46
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Story5 out of 5 stars 46
An innovative new take on the travel guide, Rice, Noodle, Fish decodes Japan's extraordinary food culture through a mix of in-depth narrative and insider advice. In this 5,000-mile journey through the noodle shops, tempura temples, and teahouses of Japan, Matt Goulding, cocreator of the enormously popular Eat This, Not That! book series, navigates the intersection between food, history, and culture, creating one of the most ambitious and complete books ever written about Japanese culinary culture from the Western perspective.
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4 out of 5 stars
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Starts strong tapers off
- By Craig Bryan on 01-02-21
By: Matt Goulding
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The Good Rain
- Across Time and Terrain in the Pacific Northwest
- By: Timothy Egan
- Narrated by: Grover Gardner
- Length: 12 hrs and 12 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall4.5 out of 5 stars 186
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Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 165
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Story4.5 out of 5 stars 165
A fantastic book! Timothy Egan describes his journeys in the Pacific Northwest through visits to salmon fisheries, redwood forests and the manicured English gardens of Vancouver. Here is a blend of history, anthropology and politics.
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5 out of 5 stars
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White man bad, capitalism bad
- By Forget about it on 04-15-21
By: Timothy Egan
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Wonderlandscape
- Yellowstone National Park and the Evolution of an American Cultural Icon
- By: John Clayton
- Narrated by: Arthur Morey
- Length: 9 hrs and 5 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall4.5 out of 5 stars 138
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Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 118
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Story4.5 out of 5 stars 118
Yellowstone is America's premier national park. Today Yellowstone is often a byword for conservation, natural beauty, and a way for everyone to enjoy the great outdoors. But it was not always this way. Wonderlandscape presents a new perspective on Yellowstone, the emotions that various natural wonders and attractions evoke, and how this explains the park's relationship to America as a whole.
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4 out of 5 stars
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Fascinating blend of history and storytelling
- By NC on 02-08-21
By: John Clayton
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Stranded
- By: Chris Bruno, David Howard Lee, Shukri R. Abdi
- Narrated by: Taraji P. Henson, Tracee Ellis Ross, Blake Griffin, and others
- Length: 2 hrs and 7 mins
- Original Recording
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Overall4.5 out of 5 stars 635
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Performance5 out of 5 stars 626
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Story4.5 out of 5 stars 626
Separated by 10 years, 3,000 miles, and the unrelenting stresses of adulthood, best friends Janet and Serena plan a 40th birthday girls’ trip to reconnect. But after a massive crash, they’re the only survivors to wash ashore on an uncharted Caribbean Island. Armed with only the clothes on their backs and zero survival skills, they fight to overcome hunger, thirst, deadly wildlife—and most terrifyingly—decades of accrued resentment. Can they find their way home, or will they kill each other first?
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5 out of 5 stars
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Get ready to Laugh
- By Lasheree McFarlane on 11-08-24
By: Chris Bruno, and others
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Born a Crime
- Stories from a South African Childhood
- By: Trevor Noah
- Narrated by: Trevor Noah
- Length: 8 hrs and 44 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall5 out of 5 stars 215,163
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Performance5 out of 5 stars 194,652
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Story5 out of 5 stars 193,683
In this award-winning Audible Studios production, Trevor Noah tells his wild coming-of-age tale during the twilight of apartheid in South Africa. It’s a story that begins with his mother throwing him from a moving van to save him from a potentially fatal dispute with gangsters, then follows the budding comedian’s path to self-discovery through episodes both poignant and comical.
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5 out of 5 stars
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Great book and perfect narration
- By MarilynArms on 12-15-16
By: Trevor Noah
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The Best Man's Ghostwriter
- By: Matthew Starr
- Narrated by: Glen Powell, Nicholas Braun, Ashley Park, and others
- Length: 4 hrs and 37 mins
- Original Recording
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Overall4.5 out of 5 stars 938
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Performance5 out of 5 stars 907
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Story4.5 out of 5 stars 907
A bad best man’s speech can ruin a wedding. Why do we plan every detail of a perfect day and then give the groom’s idiot best friend five minutes of total power? Enter Nate (Glen Powell), a speechwriter-for-hire who helps people write incredible best man speeches. To keep the best man from embarrassing himself (and the newlyweds), Nate uses his list of don’ts: Don’t mention the exes, don’t be rated R, and don’t bum everyone out. Nate’s system never fails. That is, until he meets Dan (Nicholas Braun).
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5 out of 5 stars
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SO GOOD
- By Csutty on 09-23-24
By: Matthew Starr
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Slaughterhouse-Five
- By: Kurt Vonnegut
- Narrated by: James Franco
- Length: 5 hrs and 13 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall4.5 out of 5 stars 18,951
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Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 16,940
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Story4.5 out of 5 stars 16,915
Traumatized by the bombing of Dresden at the time he had been imprisoned, Pilgrim drifts through all events and history, sometimes deeply implicated, sometimes a witness. He is surrounded by Vonnegut's usual large cast of continuing characters (notably here the hack science fiction writer Kilgore Trout and the alien Tralfamadorians, who oversee his life and remind him constantly that there is no causation, no order, no motive to existence).
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4 out of 5 stars
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Don't Quit Your Daytime Job, James
- By Keith on 11-20-15
By: Kurt Vonnegut
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The Great Indoors
- By: Ginny Hogan
- Narrated by: Mae Whitman
- Length: 3 hrs and 53 mins
- Original Recording
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Overall4.5 out of 5 stars 280
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Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 274
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Story4 out of 5 stars 274
Alice's journey begins as all good journeys do: hitting on the sales guy at REI. After a tumultuous breakup, a quick career transition, family upheaval, and a sobriety journey that didn't fix her life quite as much as she expected it to, Alice decides that the only way to solve all her problems is to hike the Pacific Crest Trail. But as she begins preparing for the months-long quest, she realizes the answers she's seeking might not be on top of a snow-covered mountain. Especially since she just learned there was snow in California.
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5 out of 5 stars
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Chuck full of laughs to lift anyone's spirits.
- By Laura Boogaert on 09-22-24
By: Ginny Hogan
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I Can't Make This Up
- Life Lessons
- By: Neil Strauss - contributor, Kevin Hart
- Narrated by: Kevin Hart
- Length: 11 hrs and 15 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall4.5 out of 5 stars 56,002
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Performance5 out of 5 stars 50,449
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Story4.5 out of 5 stars 50,193
Superstar comedian and Hollywood box-office star Kevin Hart turns his immense talent to the written word by writing some words. Some of those words include: the, a, for, above, and even even. Put them together and you have the funniest, most heartfelt, and most inspirational memoir on survival, success, and the importance of believing in yourself since Old Yeller.
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5 out of 5 stars
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Best Audiobook I Ever Listened To
- By Sam Clear on 07-13-17
By: Neil Strauss - contributor, and others
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The Perfect Find
- By: Tia Williams
- Narrated by: Wesleigh Siobhan
- Length: 11 hrs and 48 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall4.5 out of 5 stars 1,591
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Performance5 out of 5 stars 1,467
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Story4.5 out of 5 stars 1,464
Jenna Jones, former It-girl fashion editor, is broke and desperate for a second chance. When she’s dumped by her longtime fiancé and fired from Darling magazine, she begs for a job from her old arch nemesis, Darcy Vale. The beyond-bitchy publisher of StyleZine.com, Darcy agrees to hire her rival - only because her fashion site needs a jolt from Jenna’s old school cred. But Jenna soon realizes she’s in over her head.
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5 out of 5 stars
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A-FREAKING-MAZING!!!
- By Bernadette on 05-30-21
By: Tia Williams
What listeners say about Let's F*cking Visit Illinois
Average customer ratingsReviews - Please select the tabs below to change the source of reviews.
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Overall5 out of 5 stars
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Performance5 out of 5 stars
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Story5 out of 5 stars
- Mark
- 07-25-23
funny and mostly true
I grew up in the lands of corn and look back fondly of the great orgies to the great corn god.
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