It Never Goes Away
Gender Transition at a Mature Age
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Narrated by:
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Dr. Anne L. Koch
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By:
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Dr. Anne L. Koch
About this listen
If you are transgendered, the feeling of wanting your body to match the sex you feel you are never goes away. For some, though, especially those who grew up before trans people were widely out and advocating for equality, these feelings were often compartmentalized and rarely acted upon. Now that gender reassignment has become much more commonplace, many of these people may feel increasing pressure to finally undergo the procedures they have always secretly wanted.
Ken Koch was one of those people. Married twice, a veteran, and a world traveler, a health scare when he was 63 prompted him to acknowledge the feelings that had plagued him since he was a small child. By undergoing a host of procedures, he radically changed his appearance and became Anne Koch. In the process, though, Anne lost everything that Ken had accomplished. She had to remake herself from the ground up. Hoping to help other people in her age bracket who may be considering transitioning, Anne describes the step-by-step procedures that she underwent and shares the cost to her personal life in order to show seniors that although it is never too late to become the person you always knew you were, it is better to go into that new life prepared for some serious challenges.
Both a fascinating memoir of a well-educated man growing up trans yet repressed in the mid-20th century and a guidebook to navigating the tricky waters of gender reassignment as a senior, It Never Goes Away shows how what we see in the television world of Transparent translates in real life.
PLEASE NOTE: When you purchase this title, the accompanying PDF will be available in your Audible Library along with the audio.
©2019 Anne L. Koch (P)2020 Audible, Inc.Listeners also enjoyed...
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- Abridged
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Overall
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Performance
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Story
Dr. Elisabeth Kubler-Ross created her classic seminal work, On Death and Dying, to offer us a new perspective on the terminally ill. It is not a psychoanalytic study, nor is it a "how-to" manual for managing death. Rather, it refocuses on the patient as a human being and a teacher, in the hope that we will learn from him or her about the final stages of life.
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Terrible narration
- By Nassir on 06-25-05
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Committed
- Dispatches from a Psychiatrist in Training
- By: Adam Stern MD
- Narrated by: Adam Stern MD
- Length: 7 hrs and 3 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall
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Performance
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Story
Adam Stern was a student at a state medical school before being selected to train as a psychiatry resident at one of the most prestigious programs in the country. His new and initially intimidating classmates were high achievers from the Ivy League and other elite universities. Faculty raved about the group as though the residency program had won the lottery, nicknaming them “The Golden Class”, but would Stern ever prove that he belonged? In his memoir, Stern pulls back the curtain on the intense and emotionally challenging lessons he and his fellow doctors learned.
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Thank you for reminding me,
- By Ms D on 12-29-21
By: Adam Stern MD
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Confessions of a GP
- By: Benjamin Daniels
- Narrated by: Eamonn Riley
- Length: 6 hrs and 1 min
- Unabridged
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Overall
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Story
Benjamin Daniels is angry. He is frustrated, confused, baffled and, quite frequently, very funny. He is also a GP. These are his confessions.A woman troubled by pornographic dreams about Tom Jones. An 80-year-old man who can't remember why he's come to see the doctor.
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Very enjoyable
- By PCF on 05-27-17
By: Benjamin Daniels
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Your Turn
- How to Be an Adult
- By: Julie Lythcott-Haims
- Narrated by: Julie Lythcott-Haims
- Length: 20 hrs and 21 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall
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Performance
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Story
What does it mean to be an adult? In the 20th century, psychologists came up with five markers of adulthood: finish your education, get a job, leave home, marry, and have children. Since then, every generation has been held to those same markers. Yet so much has changed about the world and living in it since that sequence was formulated. All of those markers are choices, and they’re all valid, but any one person’s choices along those lines do not make them more or less an adult.
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Not the book that was advertised
- By M. Rogers on 04-13-21
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Chasing Daylight
- How My Forthcoming Death Transformed My Life
- By: Gene O'Kelly
- Narrated by: Michael Kramer
- Length: 4 hrs and 8 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall
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Performance
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Story
In May 2005, Eugene O'Kelly was diagnosed with late-stage brain cancer and given three to six months to live. Just like that. Now a growing darkness was absorbing the bright future he had seen for himself. He would have to change his plans, quickly, and capture what he could of his last diminishing days. Chasing Daylight is the account of his final journey. Starting from the time of his diagnosis and concluded upon his death less than four months later, this book is his unforgettable story.
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A Good Message That Took Way Too Long
- By Mark Williams on 09-18-24
By: Gene O'Kelly
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Changing the Way We Die
- Compassionate End-of-Life Care and the Hospice Movement
- By: Sheila Himmel, Fran Smith
- Narrated by: Coleen Marlo
- Length: 6 hrs and 49 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall
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There’s a quiet revolution happening in the way we die. More than 1.5 million Americans a year die in hospice care - nearly 44 percent of all deaths - and a vast industry has sprung up to meet the growing demand. Once viewed as a New Age indulgence, hospice is now a $14 billion business and one of the most successful segments in health care. Changing the Way We Die, by award-winning journalists Fran Smith and Sheila Himmel, is the first book to take a broad, penetrating look at the hospice landscape.
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Sadly, not very engaging.
- By Debra S. Long on 06-16-18
By: Sheila Himmel, and others
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The Game of Desire
- 5 Surprising Secrets to Dating with Dominance - and Getting What You Want
- By: Shannon Boodram
- Narrated by: Shannon Boodram
- Length: 7 hrs and 50 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall
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Performance
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Story
For younger generations, dating is a complicated mystery. Apps like Tinder and Bumble are supposed to foster connection but instead serve as a reminder of how painfully single we are. Certified sexologist and intimacy coach Shan Boodram - the most sought-after sex educator on the internet - is about to change all that. In this essential how-to guide, she addresses the realities of life today - when the rules of love and attraction are fluid - and teaches a group of young women how to become master daters in just 60 days.
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Hey it’s me...you
- By Shan Boody on 09-25-19
By: Shannon Boodram
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Women Who Think Too Much
- How to Break Free of Overthinking and Reclaim Your Life
- By: Susan Nolen-Hoeksema
- Narrated by: Sheryl Bernstein
- Length: 2 hrs and 58 mins
- Abridged
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It's not a surprise that our fast-paced, overly analytical culture is pushing people - especially women - to spend countless hours thinking about negative ideas, feelings, and experiences. Renowned psychologist Dr. Susan Nolen-Hoeksema calls this "overthinking". Her groundbreaking research shows that an increasing number of women - more than half of those in her extensive study - are doing it too much and too often, hindering their ability to lead a satisfying life.
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Generic tools for overcoming overthinking
- By letlet on 01-09-19
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A Bittersweet Season
- Caring for Our Aging Parents - And Ourselves
- By: Jane Gross
- Narrated by: Kate Reading
- Length: 15 hrs and 35 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall
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Performance
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Story
In telling the intimate story of caring for her aged and ailing mother, Jane Gross offers indispensable, and often surprising, advice for the rapidly increasing number of adult children responsible for aging parents. Gross deftly weaves the specifics of her personal experience with a comprehensive resource for effectively managing the lives of one's own parents while keeping sanity and strength intact.
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Exceptional, thought-provoking, liberating!
- By Anne on 08-10-11
By: Jane Gross
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Like a Mother
- A Feminist Journey Through the Science and Culture of Pregnancy
- By: Angela Garbes
- Narrated by: Roxana Ortega, Angela Garbes
- Length: 7 hrs
- Unabridged
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Overall
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Performance
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Story
What to listen to after What to Expect.... A badass, feminist, and personal deep-dive into the science and culture of pregnancy and early motherhood that debunks myths and dated assumptions, offering guidance and camaraderie to women navigating one of the biggest and most profound changes in their lives. Like most first-time mothers, Angela Garbes was filled with questions when she became pregnant. What exactly is a placenta? How does a body go into labor? Why is breast best? What are the signs and effects of postpartum depression?
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Microchimerism - interesting at first, then profoundly healing
- By Emily Virgil on 09-10-18
By: Angela Garbes
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Transitions of the Heart
- Stories of Love, Struggle and Acceptance by Mothers of Transgender and Gender Variant Children
- By: Rachel Pepper - editor
- Narrated by: Elisabeth Rodgers
- Length: 5 hrs and 33 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall
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Transitions of the Heart is the first collection to ever invite mothers of transgender and gender variant children of all ages to tell their own stories about their child’s gender transition. Often transitioning socially and emotionally alongside their child but rarely given a voice in the experience, mothers hold the key to familial and societal understanding of gender difference.
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Heartfelt, Well-Written, and Moving
- By Susie on 01-04-13
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30 Lessons for Living
- Tried and True Advice from the Wisest Americans
- By: Karl Pillemer Ph.D.
- Narrated by: Sean Pratt
- Length: 8 hrs and 13 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall
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Performance
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Story
More than 1,000 extraordinary Americans share their stories and the wisdom they have gained on living, loving, and finding happiness. After a chance encounter with an extraordinary 90-year-old woman, renowned gerontologist Karl Pillemer began to wonder what older people know about life that the rest of us don't. His quest led him to interview more than one thousand Americans over the age of 65 to seek their counsel on all the big issues- children, marriage, money, career, aging.
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Solid advice, however memory may bias it
- By Glenn on 10-08-12
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American Spirit
- Profiles in Resilience, Courage, and Faith
- By: Taya Kyle, Jim DeFelice
- Narrated by: Taya Kyle
- Length: 9 hrs and 32 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall
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From Taya Kyle, New York Times best-selling author of American Wife and widow of “American Sniper” Chris Kyle, an inspiring collection of stories, both personal and drawn from American history, that showcase the resilience of the “American spirit”.
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Just love Taya Kyle!
- By Rebecka R. Murray on 05-14-19
By: Taya Kyle, and others
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Would you like to be more in touch with your female side? Are you ready to create a softer "you" and stop all of the negative self-talk? It's time to celebrate who you really are. Whether you are male or female, you can embrace your feminine side and create more feminine energy with this hypnosis program, Feminization: Awaken the Feminine, from hypnotherapist Erick Brown.
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simply life changing
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It’s Christmas break. Gorgeous Piper loves nerdy Jake’s passion for buying her clothes, but her intuition tells her he does it not only because he loves her so much but also because of his hidden desire to wear them himself. She buys her love everything needed for crossdressing and transforming Jake into Jackie, her girlfriend. That afternoon, she enlightens him in the nuances of presenting his feminine side and immerses him in the pleasures of catering to his feminine persona.
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Would you like to be more in touch with your female side? Are you ready to create a softer "you" and stop all of the negative self-talk? It's time to celebrate who you really are. Whether you are male or female, you can embrace your feminine side and create more feminine energy with this hypnosis program, Feminization: Awaken the Feminine, from hypnotherapist Erick Brown.
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This BUNDLE contains ALL 5 BOOKS in the Injected Series. A new drug that transforms men into women has the power to change so many lives. It’s an injection created to help transgender women get the bodies they always should have had. But when an unethical CEO uses the drug as a punishment instead of a treatment, things quickly spiral out of control for everyone involved. Soon, the medication goes from the lab to the real world. Into the hands of other scientists. And into the bodies of other men. Some of whom never saw the transformation coming…
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Plenty of potential...
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No child is born in the wrong body, Dr. Grossman reassures us, their bodies are just fine; it’s their emotional lives that need healing. Whether you’re facing a gender identity battle in your home right now, or want to prevent one, you need this book to guide you and your loved ones out of the madness.
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Parents PLEASE READ
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In Transit
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For decades, our cultural discourse around trans and gender-diverse people has been viewed through a medical lens, through diagnoses and symptoms set down in books by cisgender doctors, or through a political lens, through dangerous caricatures. But those who claim non-binary gender identity deserve their own discourse. In Transit looks forward to a world where being who we are, whatever that looks like, isn't met with tension and long-winded explanations, but rather with acceptance and love. Being non-binary is about finding home in the in-between places.
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From personal experience to social theory
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n this unforgettable meet-cute, Samantha Allen traces her story of self-discovery during gender transition and the life-altering partnership that began with a simple hello in an elevator. Feeling “unfinished” at the liminal age of twenty-six, the author had already accumulated decades of emotional baggage growing up in a Mormon family and living with gender dysphoria. When she met Corey midtransition, she felt even more like an awkward shape-shifter. Now Samantha shares how taking a chance on that fortuitous encounter meant having the courage to be herself.
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Love, Estrogen, and Excellence
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Jeremy Ivester is a transgender man. Thirty years ago, his parents welcomed him into the world as what they thought was their daughter. As a child, he preferred the toys and games our society views as masculine. He kept his hair short and wore boys’ clothing. They called him a tomboy. That’s what he called himself. By high school, when he showed no interest in flirting, his parents thought he might be lesbian. At 20, he wondered if he was asexual. At 23, he surgically removed his breasts.
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In love with a trans man
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M to (WT)F
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- Original Recording
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Overall
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Performance
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Story
In this poignant audio piece, Samantha Allen takes listeners along for the wild ride of her own transition: The good, the bad, but mostly, the funny. Because once she began this life-changing journey in earnest, Samantha realized that while the emotional trials of gender dysphoria and self-discovery could be harrowing, there were so many laugh-out-loud moments along this winding road.
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her past is my present
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If I Was Your Girl
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Amanda Hardy is the new girl in school. Like anyone else, all she wants is to make friends and fit in. But Amanda is keeping a secret, and she's determined not to get too close to anyone. But when she meets sweet, easygoing Grant, Amanda can't help but start to let him into her life. As they spend more time together, she realizes just how much she is losing by guarding her heart. She finds herself yearning to share with Grant everything about herself, including her past.
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The middle
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Before We Were Trans
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Overall
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Performance
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Before We Were Trans illuminates the stories of people across the globe, from antiquity to the present, whose experiences of gender have defied binary categories. Blending historical analysis with sharp cultural criticism, trans historian and activist Kit Heyam offers a new, radically inclusive trans history, chronicling expressions of trans experience that are often overlooked, like gender-nonconforming fashion and wartime stage performance. Heyam looks to the past to uncover new horizons for possible trans futures.
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The history we need right now
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Sorted
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- By: Jackson Bird
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Overall
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Performance
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Story
When Jackson Bird was 25, he came out as transgender to his friends, family, and anyone in the world with an internet connection. Assigned female at birth and having been raised a girl, he often wondered if he should have been born a boy. Jackson didn’t share this thought with anyone because he didn’t think he could share it with anyone. Growing up in Texas in the 1990s, he had no transgender role models. He barely remembers meeting anyone who was openly gay, let alone being taught that transgender people existed outside of punchlines.
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Great first hand account
- By Jacob Wilson on 06-12-20
By: Jackson Bird
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Becoming Nicole
- The Transformation of an American Family
- By: Amy Ellis Nutt
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- Length: 8 hrs and 44 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall
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Performance
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Story
When Wayne and Kelly Maines adopted identical twin boys, they thought their lives were complete. But it wasn't long before they noticed a marked difference between Jonas and his brother, Wyatt. Jonas preferred sports and trucks and many of the things little boys were "supposed" to like; but Wyatt liked princess dolls and dress-up and playing Little Mermaid. By the time the twins were toddlers, confusion over Wyatt's insistence that he was female began to tear the family apart.
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More narratives like this, please.
- By book worm on 10-22-15
By: Amy Ellis Nutt
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How to Understand Your Gender
- A Practical Guide for Exploring Who You Are
- By: Alex Iantaffi, Meg-John Barker
- Narrated by: Robyn Holdaway
- Length: 7 hrs and 15 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall
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Performance
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Story
This down-to-earth guide is for anybody who wants to know more about gender, from its biology, history and sociology, to how it plays a role in our relationships and interactions with family, friends, partners and strangers. It looks at practical ways people can express their own gender and will help you to understand people whose gender might be different from your own. With activities and points for reflection throughout, this book will help people of all genders engage with gender diversity and explore the ideas in the book in relation to their own lived experiences.
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Good performance. Poor Content.
- By Jessica Hagerman on 01-17-24
By: Alex Iantaffi, and others
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She's Not There
- A Life in Two Genders
- By: Jennifer Finney Boylan
- Narrated by: Jennifer Finney Boylan
- Length: 11 hrs and 9 mins
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Overall
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Performance
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Story
The provocative best seller She's Not There is the winning, utterly surprising story of a person changing genders. By turns hilarious and deeply moving, Jennifer Finney Boylan explores the territory that lies between men and women, examines changing friendships, and rejoices in the redeeming power of family. Told in Boylan's fresh voice, She's Not There is about a person bearing and finally revealing a complex secret.
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Inspiring novel of MTF transition
- By Jamie on 03-01-18
What listeners say about It Never Goes Away
Average customer ratingsReviews - Please select the tabs below to change the source of reviews.
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Overall
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Performance
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Story
- Skylar
- 01-26-21
a great viewpoint most dont share.
she shares some of the hard to talk about issues and lessons learned from her journey
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- Julia Condolora
- 06-27-24
I felt it was too repetitive.
I felt she was very repetitive. She restated her views over and over in multiple chapters on certain topics. The performance would have been enhanced with an actor. By the time I got three quarters though I could wait for the book to end, which was unfortunate, because while I had some different experiences with my transition, I thought she shared some excellent information.
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- Nana
- 08-22-21
Pride in the honesty of this professional!
Five diamond rating for Dr.Annie’s book! Well deserved!This book is very transparent, easy to listen to!
The subject matter , although, not dentistry is relevant and helpful not just for a transitioning person , but more for people that might want to understand more…..Friends, family,physicians, dentists etc…
Dr. Koch you’ve already built a legacy in your profession. May you always find happiness, clarity and love! Thank you for sharing this book!
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- Steven
- 06-09-23
Eye Opener
As a more mature person I found this book very helpful by giving me much to think about. As you think about transitioning it points out that there are options to full transitioning which are quite valuable. It pointed out so many of the different aspects of changing that are not generally address. It has been very helpful in decisions I have to make.
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- Amazon Customer
- 06-03-20
Honest and Genuine Self Expose
Dr Anne L Koch takes the listener through the trials and tribulations of gender transition as she herself experienced it. She provides the listener with a sincere reflection upon both the psychological benefits and also her own regrets. Thank you Dr Anne for raising points of caution for anyone considering a transition later in life. These are critical points that the mainstream does not like to openly discuss. Older individuals considering gender reassignment surgery would be wise to read this book and ponder the cautious approach afforded by Dr Koch.
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- Sparks n Ashes
- 01-27-22
perfect for over 60 m2F
nearly all clinical observations and personal account by a well educated better resourced now Woman. valuable insights for anyone considering gender change with a no nonsense presentation even if a bit dry. this gave me much to think on without leaving me with even more questions
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- dpmtoo
- 06-14-24
A lot of honest information.
Some of the things were repeated to often making it difficult to stay with the book May be out of date. Which is probably with the help of the author which is a good thing.
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- Scottie
- 01-12-23
Very educational
This book really helped me understand myself, and also not alone. Very well illustrated and Annie Kosh was did a fantastic job explaining herself and what she went through.
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- Erinn B.
- 02-23-23
Waiting to find out if something went away…
Seriously got trapped by the title. I personally am in my 40s and struggle back and forth with how I feel. The title to this book made me feel like this person was a kindred spirit. Some of the book had notes of “It never goes away!” However I found the bulk of the book to feel clinical and I hate to say it but the over explaining, sometimes referred to as “Man-splaining”, is completely off the topic! I would say most trans people considering transitioning and possibly having surgery/ies do their research and don’t need a book with a poor title going over exhaustive explaining of what a surgery entails let alone multiple different procedures. Good for the author to put themselves out there but give better thought to any possible future books and the title… dont mislead people so that they can listen to you tell them about off topic information.
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- Jennifer
- 11-04-22
Transphobic Garbage
Dr. Koch tells a tale of internalized transphobia and privilege. Her story stinks and is not representative of most trans people's experiences. She should take a look at herself before she continues writing.
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