A Confession

By: Leo Tolstoy

Narrated by: Simon Vance

At this time I began to write, from vanity, greed, and pride. In my writings I did exactly as in life. In order to possess the glory and the wealth for whose sake I wrote, it was necessary to conceal the good, and to display the bad. And so I did.

Tolstoy’s autobiographical essay is a dissection of his soul, a study of his life’s movement away from the religious certainties of youth, and a vital piece of reading which contextualizes the great works he is best known for. Marking the point at which his life moved from the worldly to the spiritual, Tolstoy’s philosophical reassessment of the Orthodox faith is a work that holds vital spiritual and intellectual importance to this very day.

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I understand why I never enjoyed Tolstoy now.

Tolstoy is a literary giant and is absolutely deserving of that mention. Personally, however, I never enjoyed his great works. As stories, I find them to be incredible journeys. As that which to live by and enjoy in my heart, I could not.

This short but brilliant book really explains exactly why that is and I respect Tolstoy all the more deeply for it. His discussion about why he was motivated by non-religious life, the reality of meaninglessness when using only reason to justify life, that is precisely what made War and Peace and the like leave a poor existential taste in my mouth.

His discussion about faith and what I would contextualize as “genuineness in being” hits so close to home for me that I was nearing tears throughout half of the books runtime. Such an interesting perspective and so familiar to me that I feel as if we are brothers in thought.

Highly recommend this book to anyone whom is secular but questioning or religious and worrisome. Very interesting listen/read.

Tough but Well Written Essay

This essay deals with Leo Tolstoy's struggles of faith as he wrestles questions like the meaning of life and the motives for him to try to live a good life. Though initially extremely critical of the Orthodox Church--hence why this was banned for 20+ years after initial publication--readers have to follow Tolstoy though those doubts to realize alongside him that the deep religious convictions of ordinary people as helping them live rather than constantly analyzing why we're living.

Having previously read Tolstoy's "Anna Karenina", I recognized so many of its themes discussed here as well. There are differences in class and education, admiration for the working class, woes of the intelligencia, marriage and fatherhood, church authority and moral limitations, depression, and the temptations of suicide. This is a great look at his mindset as an author and I recommend to those studying Tolstoy's works.

However, though this is written quite well, I need to include a content warning for the number of times and depth to which Tolstoy dwells on wanting to commit suicide. He details the fluctuations in his mental health and how he came to believe time and again that suicide was the only way to escape his meaningless existence, and I recognize this could be quite triggering for readers. This is the message of "Everything Everywhere All At Once" without the heartwarming characters.

Tolstoy Becomes Real Christian!

He tells how he went from a social elite, but really useless person to one who has real trust in God. There were many parallels with Christian scripture. What I got from this is what Jesus said about how it's very hard for the rich to come to him. It also shows how you must be like a child to enter the Kingdom. I think any Christian would enjoy listening to this and could learn from it.

Being a writer and an intellectual, Tolstoy of course explores the nuances of what real faith is. That's why I so enjoyed it. It is good to have a real understanding of what faith is in general terms, not only for oneself but to discuss with your Christian brothers and sisters. Many times he related what he was saying to Christian scripture. The experienced Christian will easily see other scripture references that he did not mention, as well.

It is also good for discussing with the unbeliever, in natural perhaps secular terms, what it means to believe in God, and why faith is necessary. So it has an apologetic aspect also. Certainly for the would be apologist I would very much recommend this book!

Narration was excellent. Vance has a very pleasant voice, speaks slow enough and clearly. He is very easy to listen to.

From Christian to atheist to Truth

Leo’s story of change and his journey to discover Truth is unique and thought provoking. Challenging one’s beliefs and paradigms of who and what is God. And ultimately what brings the greatest peace in our search for meaning and happiness.

Thank you, God, for Leo Tolstoy.

The content and narration were perfect. Would you expect something less from a Tolstoy work performed by Simon Vance? Thank you, Audible.

The truth seeking journey of an intellectual

the narrator had a very clear voice. made a 3 hour drive fly by fast. great overall message.

Brazenly honest

Tolstoy walks us through his faith, doubt, depression, and hope. Simon Vance is on point, as usual. It’s a great introduction to apologetics and I sincerely enjoyed it.

5 stars

a truly inspired writer. the narration and translation is superb. 15 words are required??seriously?? why not just let me say one or two things and leave it at that??

This is a work of art!

Clearly, the book is a masterpiece.
I am so impressed with Simon Vance's performance. He must put a lot of time into practicing and recording the narration.
Well done!

The struggle to believe -- in anything

First things first: Simon Vance is, as usual, an impeccable narrator. This book takes you right down to the bottom of where you actually stand on the mystery of life. And it seems to give you only two options out of your unavoidable dilemma: (1) Ignore the mystery, that is, run away from it; or (2) Accept the galling truth that you can't solve the mystery of why we're here and must recognize, and finally succumb to, its remote, implacable power over us. Actually you have a third, radically compromised, option: (3) Believe in what you can, work for whatever good you can accomplish by doing so, and don't let the lingering unanswered questions trick you into denying the worth of life. You don't know the worth of life. Respect the force, albeit the sometimes brute force, of what you can't and never will understand. That's the deal we get, the only deal, from the day we're born until the end of our perplexing journey here.