The Accidental Alchemist

De: Gigi Pandian

Narrado por: Julia Motyka

From USA Today best-selling author Gigi Pandian comes a modern tale of ancient intrigue.

Unpacking her belongings in her new hometown of Portland, Oregon, herbalist and reformed alchemist Zoe Faust can't help but notice she's picked up a stowaway. Dorian Robert-Houdin is a living, breathing three-and-half-foot gargoyle—not to mention a master of French cuisine—and he needs Zoe's expertise to decipher a centuries-old text. Zoe, who's trying to put her old life behind her, isn't so sure she wants to reopen her alchemical past ... until the dead man on her porch leaves her no choice.

Includes recipes!

Download the recipes from the book.©2015 Gigi Pandian (P)2014 Audible Inc.

Ugh.

Would you recommend this book to a friend? Why or why not?

I would recommend this to a friend if I knew they liked characters with emotional stutters, the way I would recommend sub-par junk food to a friend who would eat anything as long as it was junk food. The main character stayed on step one of her emotional development through the entire thing, and any time the subject was brought up, she just repeated herself. There was a lot of repetition, from the tea to the "I'm a vegan and you're a vegan and everyone's a vegan!" to the same level of worry over the gargoyle no matter how bad he got. Nothing changed.

What three words best describe Julia Motyka’s voice?

I can't describe it in just three words so I'll describe it in three points.

It was strangely flirty at the wrong times - when meeting the older tea shop owner, for example. The scene was written normally, but the narrator made it sound like the two women were coming on to each other.

The reading also lacked proper emphasis - not enough here, too much over there, as though the narrator didn't know how to emotionally react to a variety of normal and extraordinary circumstances. Something was off about the voices of the teenagers, as well.

She read with a smile. Through the whole damned thing. You know when you're on the phone with someone and you can hear them smiling when they speak? Exactly like that, no matter what was happening in the story. Making a smoothie? Smiling. Teenager breaking in? Smiling. Murder mystery? Smiling. Can't find the book and worrying about a living gargoyle being bound, sentient, in stone forever? Of course, read with a smile.

If this book were a movie would you go see it?

As it is, no. Not a chance. This book is the written equivalent of those cheesy Hallmark movies on daytime t.v.

Any additional comments?

I was almost tempted to buy the last book in the series to see if Dorian is saved because I love the little scamp. He's the only good thing dwelling between these pages. But reviews are not the greatest for either of the next two books, so I'm abandoning this series. I feel that if I read a spoiler somewhere that says he is or isn't saved, that will be enough for me.

Amateur hour...update: but maybe not?

Updated review:
I returned The Accidental Alchemist after writing my original review. But something weird happened - I found myself thinking about the premise often. So when, a few years later, I saw it in the Plus catalog, I downloaded it. Then the sequels were on sale or in the Plus library, so I got those too. …because Gigi Pandian IS getting better with each book.
So I’ve upgraded my original 2 stars to 3 for The Accidental Alchemist. Besides, the sequel has a PDF with recipes.

Original review:
Are you kidding?

Is this a new sub-category of fantasy: "Granola Lit"?. This is almost embarrassingly amateurish writing, frequently punctuated with laugh-out-loud hippyisms. On the other hand I do think this author has the potential to become very interesting.

The plus side: Julia Motyka is a pretty good narrator, and she has an absolutely beautiful voice.

Great new series!

I found this book to move pretty swiftly. It kept my attention and I had a hard time putting it down. I also really enjoyed the narration of the book. I am already looking forward to the next book in the series.

Seriously?

Would you recommend this book to a friend? Why or why not?

No, the story started out decently but then kind of fizzled and was somewhat predictable. Then there was sudden skipping around. She finds the missing kids in a tunnel and then all of a sudden it is the next morning. No explanation.

What could Gigi Pandian have done to make this a more enjoyable book for you?

Leave out all the food talk. It's fine if your character is vegan, you don't have to repeatedly explain why she is or talk about all the food she eats. It's irritating and irrelevant to the story.

Have you listened to any of Julia Motyka’s other performances before? How does this one compare?

No

Do you think The Accidental Alchemist needs a follow-up book? Why or why not?

NO

Any additional comments?

I did really like that it was set in Portland and near Hawthorne because I live in this area of the country and knew many of the places she mentioned. That was cool.

Tea? Enough with the frickin' tea!

Any additional comments?

I enjoyed Julia Motyka's reading. She's quite good and if I was on the fence about a book, she's edge me towards getting it. It's too bad the execution of the story did live up to the narration.

First up nothing about Zoe made me want to root for her and I kept wishing she would stop being so wishy-washy and either decide to go all the way back into alchemy or not. Make a decision. You're ancient. You've spent hundreds of years wallowing and it's time to make a decision. Dorian, on the other hand was a lot more fun. Again, being so old you think he would have a little more patience, but he's an awesome character!

Then comes the content of the story. It's not about a murder. It's about tea. Practically every conversation is about tea. While this conversation never actually happens, it sure sums up the way the book goes.

"Do you drink tea?"

"Yes, I do. I hear there's been a murder. I wonder if they served bad tea?"

"It can't be! A murderer can't drink tea."

Sigh.

Add to it the constant restating of things already discussed and it's a fairly tedious listen. If I had to read the book, I probably would have put it down.

could be better

The concept is a unique one but the execution is a bit juvenile for me

Camp

Story is good, basic mystery with logical conclusion. Writing, well it's a little wordy but very camp. Enjoyable but not a lot of depth.

Fun!

There are a glut of urban fantasy novels out there. But this one is quite charming and worth a listen. The character of Dorian in particular is delightful. And I am pleased that the romance in the novel is hardly there - the whole "they meet and for no clear reason are immediately infatuated with one another" is kept to a minimum. There isn't even a love triangle where the heroine tries to decide between a good guy and a bad boy, thank God. It's almost as if the author slipped in what there is as a token nod towards an unwritten rule that any urban fantasy with a female protagonist absolutely must have romance. The book could drop that part and be no worse off.

Apart from that, it is a pleasant and engaging romp. The main complaint people would have is what would seem to be a pro-vegan bent by the author, but that could almost be dismissed as a coincidental quirk of a few characters, instead of a militant crusade of the author's.

I'm HOOKED

If you're looking for an awesome story to get lost in - LOOK NO FURTHER! This story is only the beginning & it's an absolutely great beginning. The story line & narrator will keep you locked in for the entire series!

Fun story!

Entertaining and lighthearted. I'm glad I purchased this book and listened to it. The narrator did an excellent job with the French gargoyle voice and all the others! Definitely would recommend!