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Our special 10th episode (which is significant for coming after episode 9 and before 11) has BOMT (The Battery Operated Magic Toupee) in a sombre and depressed mood as the existence of the podcast series lowers the quality of life and creates a stink throughout all known multiverses, thorough out all times and all different planes of existence known and unknown. And if you think this is bad, wait till episode 11 of this podcast launches.

First we explore the joys of cooking porridge in your pants and the sensation of oatmeal oozing of your crack (or cracks pending your gender).

After you clean the porridge off your privates, get ready to stimulate yourself to Erotic Furniture Repair and see which way the wing nut screws.

When you go to a concert or presentation do you applaud politely as the person walks out on stage to perform their bit? Your politeness could trigger WW3 so heed our warning: “Don’t Applaud When Someone Comes on Stage”.

We revisit Sammy The Toothpick as he condenses another classics: “Brokeback Mountain”. Sammy warns us over the dangers of cowboys fucking each other instead of the cattle.

Next – the wonder jism of the decade, remain youthful forever with the miracle of “Sheldon Quimm’s Spunk”.

“Life Beyond – Tales Of People Who Returned From The Other Side” answers the most sort after esoteric question of the cosmos: “Can you have a wank in heaven? “

Finally, in “Poking Fun at Sacred Cows”- we acknowledge that we have crossed a line. We are ashamed, we should be cancelled, deleted and… hell: we should be executed and our diseased heads impaired on stakes of shame for all the public to urinate upon. We urge you, for the sake of your sanity and what little self-respect you have: DO NOT listen to this final sketch.

Welcome/ warning intro

Theme music montage

Porridge In Your Pants

Erotic Furniture Repair

Don’t Applaud When Someone Comes on Stage

Sammy The Toothpick’s Condensed classics: Brokeback Mountain

Sheldon Quimm’s Spunk

{PODCAST PROMO)

Life Beyond – Tales Of People Who Returned From The Other Side

Poking Fun At Sacred Cows

Closing Credits