You and Your Adult Child

How to Grow Together in Challenging Times

By: Laurence Steinberg

Narrated by: Laurence Steinberg

A “wonderfully innovative” (Jennifer Senior, New York Times bestseller All Joy and No Fun), much-needed guide for parents of people in their twenties and thirties from one of the world’s leading developmental psychologists.

Your child is now an adult, but your job as a parent is far from over. Instead, your role must evolve to meet their ongoing, changing needs. But what exactly are these new needs? And why are they so different now than they were when you were a young adult?

This is the first comprehensive guide written for parents whose children are in two of the most crucial decades of life. Steinberg discusses topics as various as whether you should be involved in your child’s college education, how to behave when they unexpectedly must move back home, how to state your opinion on their romantic partners, what to do when you disagree with the way they are raising their own child, and what parameters to apply if you want to give them money for a home or startup. He answers such challenging questions as: When do I express my opinion and when should I bite my tongue? How do I know if my son is floundering? Is it okay to help my daughter with her grad school application? What should I do if my kid is getting seriously involved with someone I think is dangerous? We have been helping our twenty-five-year-old financially for the last few years, but how long is too long? How can I help my adult child through a difficult psychological time?

Leading psychologist Laurence Steinberg has devoted his forty-five-year career to researching parent-child relationships. Here, he provides some “must-read” (Martin Seligman, PhD, author of The Hope Circuit) principles to help parents with adult children think more intelligently about common issues, avoid minefields, weather the inevitable ups and downs, and create a stronger, happier, more effective bond with their child.

©2023 Laurence Steinberg, Ph.D. (P)2023 Simon & Schuster, Inc.

A fantastic read

There was nothing to dislike about this book. Any parent/grandparent of any age can get a lot of information and understanding from this wonderful book. The layout of the chapters, the clarity of the descriptions are so easy to read and understand. I’m in my 80’s, have two children in their 50’s and no grandchildren but I learned so
Much about what I did right (and some not so). I just wish this book had been around 40+ years ago. I have told many younger friends about it. It is a must read and the nice thing is I consider it an easy and informative one! Thanks for producing this book.

Just what I needed

Having 3 adult children, at different stages in life I definitely needed the advice of this book. Great read.

A must-read book

Dr. Steinberg, in ‘You and Your ADULT CHILD’ new book, draws upon decades of wisdom and research, to better understand the dynamics of parents and their adult children, which I have not read in any other book before.

As a young adult myself, I found fascinating the ways we can learn to navigate new milestones while transitioning onto young adulthood, which are no longer relevantly compared to those generations ago! Dr. Steinberg's advice certainly will facilitate the bond between me and my mother, in these challenging times, which wasn’t the case when our parents grew up.

As a young scholar, I better understand the mediating and moderating effects of parental processes on the associations between adult individuation, and mental health outcomes.

For parents that are parenting their adult children, it gives practical advice for most things, and understand how the parental role has changed. Learn how to be involved in your child's life, without being intrusive, learn how to facilitate individuation without hindering autonomy granting, and be there when adult children need you yet respect their own adult roles. Learn how to resolve disputes constructively, as ‘When you and your adult child are in a war, nobody wins’.

Find out the ‘When I was your age’ phrase where it stands in this fast-growing society.

Thank you for sharing your wisdom with us all ☺️

Very helpful

Enjoyed all the perspectives from the stage we are now to stages we’ve been through and stages yet to come. Seems like the author is a very wise coach.

Well structure and researched

I did like the structure, the topic and the recommendations, specially because it is difficult to find books about this topic.

You and your adult child

The author writes concise advise. Recommend this material for all to learn true modern day delemas we face with our adult children.

Nothing new

Just about everything in this book is stuff you've heard before and common sense. Nothing new