The Value of Others

Understanding the Economic Model of Relationships to Get (and Keep) More of What You Want in the Sexual Marketplace

By: Orion Taraban

Narrated by: Orion Taraban

Length: 12 hrs and 38 mins

Publisher's summary

If everyone is looking to secure a relationship with their perceived best option, then the perception of value must be at the heart of human coupling. In this groundbreaking work, psychologist Orion Taraban sets forth his economic model of relationships and exposes the often uncomfortable laws that govern the sexual marketplace. After listening to "The Value of Others," you'll never look at relationships the same way again.

©2024 Orion Taraban (P)2024 Orion Taraban

A Goodly Medicine for Aching Hearts

For a long time I’ve been trying to find better answers on what it means to be a good man and a good person. Over the past few years we’ve seen a cultural forest fire ravage both traditional and contemporary ideas that form the basis of how individuals understand and play the game of life. While overgrown and rotting ideas have burned to the ground, strong and healthy ideas have been damaged by the blaze. Some despair at the destruction; their eyes clouded by smoke, they fail to look at the ground and see that new seeds have already begun to grow. The seeds of the greatest ideas only take root when opened by the heat of an inferno. This book is one of these new growths.

The Value of Others is a clear and accessible synthesis of a broad range of sources that forms an illuminating vision of the fundamental economics of sexual relationships. It is as invigorating as The Will to Power and as compassionate as The Will to Change. It finds a balance of academic fluency, straightforwardness, and playful creativity that to me is most reminiscent of the work of Contrapoints. Her most recent video exploring heterosexual dynamics through the lens of Twilight would actually make a great companion piece to this book.

This is so much more than a relationship advice book, it’s a theoretical framework for relationships and relationship advice in general. I've found it almost invariable that relationship content flattens the complexity of romantic relationships into a more broadly palatable package, but The Value of Others continually provides additional nuance and context for its message and terminology. I particularly appreciated the analogies employed: especially that of the captain/passenger framework. For as rhetorically simple and effective as the prose is, the book is sprinkled with many nuggets of literary richness. Talking points reminiscent of contemporary internet discourse will suddenly be enlivened by Shakespearean allusion. Complicated psychological and philosophical concepts are distilled into clear and concise observations. A discussion of love and limerence will emerge into an exploration of medieval and history. The chapter on love is possibly the best and most powerful in the book. Anyone who angrily disagrees with the book’s earlier ideas needs to read this chapter for context: it’s a striking counterpoint to the seemingly mercenary ideas presented.

I listened to the audiobook for my read-through and I strongly recommend it. The book is narrated by the author, and his training and background as a professional actor shine through in the performance. It’s clear, effective, and has just the right amount of emphasis and variation in the delivery.

I highly recommend this book to anyone with an interest in gaining greater understanding of relationships.

“Therefore this maxim out of love I teach:
Achievement is command; ungained, beseech.
Then though my heart’s content firm love doth bear,
Nothing of that shall from mine eyes appear.”