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The Preternatural Chronicles: Books 0.5-3.5
- Preternatural Chronicles Boxsets, Volume 1
- Narrated by: Luke Daniels
- Length: 39 hrs and 17 mins
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Publisher's summary
The first three novels and the prequel novella in the Preternatural Chronicles: I'm Glad You're Dead, Dawn and Quartered, Shadow of a Doubt, and Deliverance.
My name is John Cook, and my life began the day my heart stopped beating.
You meet the most interesting men in Medieval prisons. This one time, I met a guy who offered me immortality for the low, low price of changing my diet. I didn’t read the fine print. Because he wasn’t talking about a gluten-free diet. More like hemoglobin-full.
And now I’m a friggin’ vampire with five centuries of pop culture references.
Granted, at the time, I was listening to the dying screams of my mother and father being burned and eviscerated alive just outside the rusty bars of the prison cell, and my new best friend was offering me my only real chance at saving my own life and avenging my parents’ brutal murders.
Except my first chance at vengeance took about 500 years, and I had to wade through oceans of sin and violence, blackening my soul—and my already dark sense of humor—beyond redemption until I met Father Thomes—a Roman Catholic priest—in present-day Houston. Papa Thomes taught me how to use my dark curse to fight for the good guys. Like Alfred and Robin did for Batman—except we straight up murder Jokers and Two-Faces. Biteman and Pope’n.
We stand up for the downtrodden, the forgotten, and the neglected....
By exsanguinating the wicked in horrific, truly imaginative ways, and having a grand ol’ time doing it. You know what they say about doing what you love....
But our party is soon cut short when we learn the end of days is just around the corner and that the fine print of my contract might have hidden a few other tidbits. Like the fact that I was central to kicking off the apocalypse and that the archdemons will stop at nothing to make sure the dude abides by the terms of his contract.
I guess I need a lawyer.
Get ready to laugh at extreme violence. I know I will. If you’re not laughing, you’re learning.
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Inheriting your uncle's supervillain business is more complicated than you might think. Particularly when you discover who's running the place. Charlie's life is going nowhere fast. A divorced substitute teacher living with his cat in a house his siblings want to sell, all he wants is to open a pub downtown, if only the bank will approve his loan. Then his long-lost uncle Jake dies and leaves his supervillain business (complete with island volcano lair) to Charlie. But becoming a supervillain isn't all giant laser death rays and lava pits.
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Volcanic Lairs, Death Rays & Cats… Oh My! 😼
- By C. White on 09-19-23
By: John Scalzi
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What listeners say about The Preternatural Chronicles: Books 0.5-3.5
Average customer ratingsReviews - Please select the tabs below to change the source of reviews.
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- Anonymous User
- 10-11-23
ok, ummmmm
yea. this book is good and the reader is awsom... BUT. im just about to stop listening. the guy keeps fliping out and leaving his companion s to fight on their own. How many times many times is he going to keep doing it. itz getting long in the tooth and I still have 10 hours to go. I may not finish this because John is a grown idiot with power. he's still, like a child. like I said. very, VERY LONG IN THE TOOTH
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- Katherine Orho
- 12-04-23
What do you do when evil has you surrounded?
When you are in the fight of your life, here is my advice:
Take small model Death Star and turn it into a giant Pokéball, to capture all of your enemies.
Trust me, it's a great...PLAN!
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- J. Payne Jr.
- 09-24-23
Great stuff!
Great story so far! Really enjoying the characters and of course, Luke Daniels knocks it out of the park on the narration!
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- Talia
- 05-15-24
Long in the tooth
Good story, but goes on and on. The narrator is pretty good. I think I have 13 hrs left and I'm not sure I can finish it. same story over and over. 3.5 ⭐
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