The Hitman's Guide to Making Friends and Finding Love
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Narrated by:
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Michael Ferraiuolo
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By:
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Alice Winters
About this listen
What happens when a snarky hit man and a by-the-book PI cross paths?
Leland
Being a hit man has its perks, but I never thought getting an accidental mooning by an attractive PI while he’s caught on a fence would be one of them. While it’s not exactly love at first sight, he’s captured my interest and won’t let go.
Suddenly, I find myself caught in a game of cat and mouse, determined to attract the attention of Jackson, the PI who should be my enemy. He pretends like he’s not flattered by my flowers and the mentions of my totally-not-fictitious blow-up doll, Randy (or was it Dandy?), but I know better. Why else would he be teaming up with me to bring down Hardek, one of the city’s most ruthless criminals?
Jackson
Even though the cops are telling me that the hit man is a notorious contract killer, I can’t help but admit that I’m drawn to him. He’s funny, charismatic, and attractive. There’s no way this ridiculous man can be the person the cops are after.
But when Leland ends up at my doorstep injured, I’m faced with a tough choice. It’s my duty to hand him over to law enforcement, but my heart has other plans. I want to keep him. To protect him. To be with him.
Though one question remains: Why in the world does the man have so many d*mn guns?
Contains: shenanigans on a swing that you would not find at a playground, a car chase that sadly doesn't have flips or explosions, a horsey ride sans horse, cuddles, an exuberant mutt, a suspicious chief of police, and lots and lots of laughs.
©2019 Alice Winters (P)2019 Alice WintersListeners also enjoyed...
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Story
Jory Keyes leads a normal life as an architect’s assistant until he is witness to a brutal murder. Though initially saved by police Detective Sam Kage, Jory refuses protective custody - he has a life he loves that he won’t give up no matter who is after him. But Jory’s life is in real jeopardy, especially after he agrees to testify about what he saw. While dealing with attempts on his life, well-meaning friends who want to see him happy, an overly protective boss, and a slowly unfolding mystery that is much more sinister than he could ever imagine, the young gay man finds himself getting involved with Sam, the conflicted and closeted detective....
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Time is the answer...
- By Donald on 03-28-13
By: Mary Calmes
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Five
- A Mister Standalone, Book 0.5
- By: JA Huss
- Narrated by: Anna Riordan, Teddy Hamilton
- Length: 8 hrs and 24 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall
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Performance
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Story
Five Aston has known Rory Shrike for as long as he can remember. He played with her in the sandbox. He went to every damn horse show just to be supportive. He helped her with her French, walked her home from school, and faked his test scores just to stay with her a little longer and not be sent off to college early. But eventually he had to move on. And so did she. Never has a second chance meant so much to a boy who loves a girl.
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✫✫ 5 Stars ✫✫
- By 🎧 Cyndi Marie 🎧 on 02-02-18
By: JA Huss
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Hard Target
- Wrecked: Guardians, Book 1
- By: Kelly Fox
- Narrated by: Zane Daniels
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Overall
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Story
Everett: There are a ton of reasons why falling for my tiny, adorkable best friend is a terrible idea - starting with the body in my trunk. I have other reasons - he still mourns his late husband. I’m way older, he’s a foot shorter, my tattoo shop is a front, he’s an assistant professor at UT. Still, I can’t help but think we’d be perfect for each other if I didn’t kill people (very, very bad people) for a living.
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In awe
- By James Buchanan on 05-29-21
By: Kelly Fox
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Text 2 Lovers
- By: K. Webster, J. D. Hollyfield
- Narrated by: Ava Erickson, Jacob Morgan
- Length: 6 hrs and 21 mins
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Overall
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Performance
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Story
I fired off a storm of raunchy text messages...to the wrong number. And he replied. Him: Show me a picture. Him: Tell me your name. Why does the lure of anonymity have me craving to indulge a stranger?
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✫✫ 4 Stars ✫✫
- By ❤️Cyndi Marie❤️🎧Audiobook Addicts🎧 on 05-07-18
By: K. Webster, and others
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Santori
- By: Maris Black
- Narrated by: J.F. Harding
- Length: 7 hrs and 29 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall
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Performance
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Story
Michael Kage Santori has just inherited a thriving hotel and millions of dollars. He’s poised to become an MMA champion. Things couldn’t be better between him and his college boy lover, Jamie Atwood - especially in the bedroom, where Jamie is more than eager to let Kage take out his aggressions on him. Kage seems to have it all, but success and happiness have come at a steep price. After all of the childhood trauma he endured at the hands of his controlling uncle, Peter Santori, it’s a miracle Kage has any shred of sanity left. And now, because of him, Jamie is a murderer.
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Oddly constructed but compelling serial installment
- By Cranky Reader on 04-13-19
By: Maris Black
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Thief
- The Academy: The Scarab Beetle, Book 1
- By: C. L. Stone
- Narrated by: Megan Tusing
- Length: 15 hrs and 25 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall
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Performance
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Story
Kayli Winchester is a dirt-poor girl living out of a hotel, forced to be the parent for a drunken father and teenage brother who she's desperate to keep in school. The only way she scrapes by is to utilize her one skill: pickpocketing. But even though she's a thief she has a moral code: no kids or old ladies, only targets who can defend themselves. Not that they see her coming...
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Good first book in the series
- By 🎧Romance Junkie🎧 on 10-04-19
By: C. L. Stone
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The Unsung Hero
- Troubleshooters, Book 1
- By: Suzanne Brockmann
- Narrated by: Patrick Lawlor, Melanie Ewbank
- Length: 15 hrs and 16 mins
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Overall
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Story
After a near-fatal head injury, Navy SEAL lieutenant Tom Paoletti catches a glimpse of an international terrorist in his New England hometown. When he calls for help, the Navy dismisses the sighting as injury-induced imaginings. In a last-ditch effort to prevent disaster, Tom creates his own makeshift counterterrorism team, assembling his most loyal officers, two elderly war veterans, a couple of misfit teenagers, and Dr. Kelly Ashton.
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New narration breathes life into this for me
- By Kindle Customer (VH) on 06-21-16
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Jack of Hearts
- Aces & Eights, Book 1
- By: Sandra Owens
- Narrated by: Amy McFadden, Sebastian York
- Length: 8 hrs and 44 mins
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Story
Alex Gentry doesn't scare easily. Working as an undercover FBI agent in the biker bar he and his brothers co-own, he hangs with deadly criminals in order to gather information. Danger is just part of the family business. But one thing has him terrified: his attraction to Madison Parker. Madison is the cousin of Ramon Alonzo, son and second in command to a notorious drug lord Alex is trying to bust. Alex has befriended Ramon as part of his cover, and Madison has unknowingly become his informant. Falling for her could risk this case - and both their lives.
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Sadly This Wasn't For Me... 😥
- By Cheri on 02-26-17
By: Sandra Owens
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Always Mine
- Liam & Madelyn Duet 1
- By: Kennedy Fox
- Narrated by: Aiden Snow, Maxine Mitchell
- Length: 10 hrs and 15 mins
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Overall
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Performance
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Story
College parties, beer, and one-night stands - that was my life. Now, I hunt down criminals, ethically or not, but if no one's asking, then I'm not telling. Drinking and women are still included, although I can't seem to forget the girl who almost gave me her virginity. She would've until I realized she was too young, and I wasn't looking to get thrown into jail.
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Doesn't live up to expectations
- By Darla O on 06-18-20
By: Kennedy Fox
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Dragon’s Lair
- By: Chantal Fernando
- Narrated by: Eva Christensen
- Length: 5 hrs and 11 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall
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Performance
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Story
When I found my boyfriend cheating on me, I did something stupid. Or should I say, someone? Because of that mistake, I'm now stuck in a world I don't belong in. I'm a law student. They're criminals. He's the Vice President of a MC. I'm a good girl with a strict upbringing. He's my ex-boyfriend's brother. And I'm screwed.
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Good book not blah blah type romance book
- By Jeanne on 02-15-16
By: Chantal Fernando
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Dangerous Race
- By: Dee J. Adams
- Narrated by: Eve Bianco
- Length: 14 hrs and 4 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall
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Performance
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Story
Four years ago, race car driver Tracey Bradshaw almost died in a horrific crash. Now scarred inside and out, she's making a comeback, but her team is plagued by a series of "accidents."
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Good
- By Leesa on 07-10-13
By: Dee J. Adams
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Beautifully Broken
- By: K B Winters
- Narrated by: James Larceny, Summer Morton
- Length: 5 hrs and 52 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall
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Performance
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Story
As an ex-Navy SEAL there are a few guarantees in life. Avoiding relationships is one of them. Dealing with PTSD is another. So when I come across the Reckless Bastards MC, it’s perfect for a man like me. Last thing I expect is to encounter Jana Carter at a painting class. Don’t ask why I was there. I can hardly keep my eyes off of her. She’s a shy, sultry vixen, and she grabs ahold of me so hard, I can’t let go.
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Can the quiet girl save the broken ex-Seal?
- By Reggie on 11-08-18
By: K B Winters
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5 Years Later
- By: Jaxson Kidman, London Casey
- Narrated by: Laurie Catherine Winkel, Tristan Wright
- Length: 8 hrs and 28 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall
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Performance
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Story
When I was 13, he stole my heart. When I was 18, he took my innocence. When I was 23, he said he would love me forever. When I was 28, he broke my heart. Now I'm 33... and there's a knock at the door. He's back, again. And this time he's not alone.
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Awful!
- By Susanf on 07-21-18
By: Jaxson Kidman, and others
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thoroughly entertained
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incredible as always.
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Finally good queer poly rep!
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I’m stuck sharing a coffin with the world’s perkiest vampire. This vacation is going to suck. After centuries of eternal existence, and still mourning the loss of my lover to vicious slayers, I needed a few days of peaceful solitude at the Hotel Draugr. But thanks to a double-booking mishap, I’m forced to share my coffin with Kilroy, a freshly bitten vampire who loves his new afterlife as much as he loves hanging ten. My unexpected roommate is determined to show me how “totally awesome” being a vampire can be.
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From Heathrow Airport to around the world, this set of steamy standalone novels follow passengers whose lives—and hearts—take unexpected turns. Adventure, passion, and love await them at every destination. Buckle up, because someone is always flying somewhere, but these men are all headed for one thing: their happily ever after.
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What happens when you fall and hit the webtoons trope tree? You get killed by Truck-kun, get transported to a fantasy world by a sentient Fae coin, and become the first gay holy maiden. Jake Alexander is Not Happy to be sure. Fortunately in Jake's case, part of the trope tree includes the gorgeous Duke of the North, Theon. And starting a business from scratch, which he's always wanted to do. And revitalizing his new country which is on the verge of collapse.
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What listeners say about The Hitman's Guide to Making Friends and Finding Love
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- Lena Belle
- 01-01-20
It’s Leland’s World, You Just Live In It
First Michael bringing Leland to life was out of this world funny. Who could not LOVE Leland and Jackson are funny, steamy, loving and caring together. It’s the perfect opposites attract and age gap romance.
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- Phoenix
- 02-28-20
love
I have listened to this book about 10 times already and every time it is just as amazing as the first! Love the narrator and the author! these characters are fantastic!
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1 person found this helpful
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- Kj
- 12-14-19
Goofy, Funny, Lovely
I read about 3/4ths of the Kindle version of this book a while back, and it got to a point where I thought some real angst was about to happen so I paused on reading it an never got back to it (I'm good at that). The audible version came up in my recommendations and I leapt at the chance to finally finish the book.
The good news is, the book really doesn't get angsty! It walks a line of understanding, mixes in so much humor, and while it doesn't take itself too seriously it also doesn't avoid real feeling or internal conflict in order to keep things light. Really well done.
I tend to like Michael Ferraiulo's narration, and he didn't disappoint here. He was perfect for teasing the humor out of each line without making the story read as ridiculous, which can be a fine line in a story with as many silly situations as this one has.
Overall, recommend to anyone looking for something that isn't too doom-and-gloom (especially for a hitman story!).
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- emily
- 11-18-19
A must read
Laughed from beginning to end. This definitely became one of my favorites. You will be hooked from the first chapter.
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- F. Moon
- 12-16-19
Laughing So Hard 🤣
This story is relationship driven. The plot is there just to further this impossible relationship. Banter, puns, clever repartee, and NSFW snark fill the story with laughter and joy.
Narrator Michael Ferraiuolo is a master of comedic timing, and a thousand voices. Without his talent and skill, this story would not have been so much fun.
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- Mom Needs Coffee
- 10-25-21
Amazing narration of a hilarious book
This is one of those books I'd rather listen to than read. Michael Ferraiuolo IS Leland and Jackson. He gives each man a voice and a personality, add that to how wonderfully he tells the story and this is a 5/5 audiobook. I can't get over how great Mr. Ferraiuolo is at storytelling- not once did I feel like I was being read to, not once did I have to stop and check to see who's POV I was listening to. Hands down, best possible narration for a book that's fun and exciting.
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- Aerielle
- 11-20-19
So amazingly good
Another perfectly, amazing audiobook! Leland is so over the top crazy but just can’t help liking him. Jackson is staid and stoic but he starts to loosen up farther into the book. This audio had me smiling and giggling the whole time!!
Michael Ferraiuolo was the perfect narrator for this story. He brought these guys to life!!!!
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- Rachel BPG
- 11-23-19
So funny and entertaining!!
I loved this audio! I had read the book when it first came out and thought it was great. It’s was so funny and entertaining. So when the audio came out I just knew it would be good and it did not disappoint. It was awesome, the narrator did an Amazing job with both Leland and Jackson. I wish I could have given it more stars it was that good. Do yourself a favor and listen to this audio it will make your life happier!!
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- Amazon Customer
- 12-26-19
AMAZING!
Wish there was a 10 star rating! Hitman 2 now please! Narrator is OUTSTANDING!
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- Sharon Menn
- 02-25-20
Great read
This is one of the funniest books I have ever listened to. Great story and Wonderful narrator.
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