That's Your Lot
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That's Your Lot
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Narrated by:
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Limmy
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By:
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Limmy
About this listen
This is Limmy’s second book.
It’s a whole load of new, odd, and hilariously grim short stories.
Tom is in a soft play with his daughters. He’s bored. He’s so bored he can move things with his mind.
A man fills up a mate’s biscuit tin without ever telling him, to see what happens.
Maggie’s boyfriend Iain bought a curtain. It keeps attacking them. She wants it out the house.
A man is sitting in his wheelie bin at two in the morning, and he wants to tell you why.
Kenny’s mate Scott is suicidal and ridden with guilt. Kenny takes him on holiday to Benidorm. It’ll be some laugh.
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Critic reviews
‘Short stories shot through with anxiety, guilt, depression, delusion and jet black humour’ Daily Telegraph
Praise for the author:
"Daft Wee Stories will sate Limmy's existing fans and proves once again that his wickedly anarchic sensibility moves effortlessly between media." Chortle
"Disturbing yet very, very funny, it's a shocking, scathing delight." Sun
"So good they'll make you snot yourself laughing." Scotland on Sunday
"
"The tales he treats us to are indeed both daft and wee; happily, they’re funny, peculiar and original, too." (Guardian)
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- Length: 6 hrs and 29 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall4 out of 5 stars 139
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Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 114
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Story4 out of 5 stars 112
A novel that grips from the very beginning and that will live long in the memory, The Last Thing I Remember is Deborah Bee's startling debut thriller. Sarah is in a coma. Her memory is gone - she doesn't know how she got there. And she doesn't know how she might get out. But then she discovers that her injury wasn't an accident. And that the assailant hasn't been caught. Unable to speak, see or move, Sarah must use every clue that she overhears to piece together her own past.
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5 out of 5 stars
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Grow up...
- By Kelly on 03-08-20
By: Deborah Bee
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Watermelon
- By: Marian Keyes
- Narrated by: Gerri Halligan
- Length: 13 hrs and 46 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall4.5 out of 5 stars 108
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Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 100
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Story4 out of 5 stars 100
At 29, Claire is full of the joys of life - that is, until her husband leaves her on the day she gives birth to her baby. With a broken heart, a beautiful newly born and an expanding mirror image, she decides to visit her eccentric family in Dublin. There she starts to feel better. So much better, in fact, that James is in for a surprise when he decides to slither back into her life....
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5 out of 5 stars
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A fun read, every time
- By Audrey Smith on 01-06-23
By: Marian Keyes
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Lie in Wait
- By: G. J. Minett
- Narrated by: Joe Jameson
- Length: 11 hrs and 7 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall4.5 out of 5 stars 32
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Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 27
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Story4.5 out of 5 stars 26
Owen Hall drives into a petrol station to let his passenger use the facilities. She never comes back - and what's more, it seems she never even made it inside. When Owen raises a fuss, the police are called - and soon identify Owen himself as a possible culprit, not least because they already have him in the frame for another more sinister crime. Owen's always been a little different, and before long others in the community are baying for his blood. But this is a case where nothing is as it seems - least of all Owen Hall....
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4 out of 5 stars
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LIE IN WAIT..
- By ZacharyKindle Customer on 08-06-17
By: G. J. Minett
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I Predict a Riot
- Murder, Extortion & Carrot Cake
- By: Colin Bateman
- Narrated by: Adam Moore
- Length: 21 hrs and 33 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall4 out of 5 stars 72
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Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 28
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Story4 out of 5 stars 28
Walter has a rubbish job, so has Margaret. But when they meet through a dating agency, neither is who they seem. Margaret's married for a start, and Walter's encounter with her husband, Billy, leaves him black and blue. Billy's a dodgy accountant for politician and racketeer Pink Harrison, who is about to come unstuck.
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5 out of 5 stars
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PICK ME PLEASE PICK ME WE'LL HAVE LOTS OF FUN
- By Louise on 10-19-08
By: Colin Bateman
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The Perfect Lie
- By: Emily Barr
- Narrated by: Jilly Bond, Penelope Rawlins, Julia Franklin
- Length: 11 hrs and 19 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall4 out of 5 stars 61
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Performance4 out of 5 stars 55
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Story4 out of 5 stars 56
For Lucy Riddick, Venice has always been the dream destination, the ideal place to lose herself. And now she needs to do just that. The secret she's been keeping has finally caught up with her and Lucy needs to disappear - fast. But what if, when she sets foot in Venice, Lucy finds the one thing she has been running from?
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5 out of 5 stars
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Fun and Absorbing
- By Jen Griffin on 10-15-15
By: Emily Barr
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Hero: A Simon Serrailler Short Story
- By: Susan Hill
- Narrated by: Steven Pacey
- Length: 51 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall4 out of 5 stars 129
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Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 112
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Story4 out of 5 stars 111
When Simon Serrailler was a rookie constable with the Met, he did something reckless in the course of a night's work which caused a man's death. But his act was praised by his colleagues, and he was called a hero. Years later, now a detective chief superintendent who has been badly injured in the course of duty, he receives a medal for bravery at Buckingham Palace while recollecting that fateful night of his early career, when chance disguised itself as bravery.
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4 out of 5 stars
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This 'story' makes no sense to me
- By Pamela Donaldson on 05-10-17
By: Susan Hill
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Are You Watching Me?
- DS Claire Boyle, Book 2
- By: Sinead Crowley
- Narrated by: Aoife McMahon
- Length: 8 hrs and 57 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall4 out of 5 stars 43
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Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 38
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Story4 out of 5 stars 38
Dear Elizabeth, I've been watching you. I hope to see you...soon. Liz Cafferky is on the up. Rescued from her dark past by the owner of a drop-in centre for older men, Liz soon finds herself as the charity's face - and the unwilling darling of the Dublin media. Amidst her claustrophobic fame, Liz barely notices a letter from a new fan. But then one of the centre's clients is brutally murdered, and Elizabeth receives another, more sinister note. Running from her own ghosts, Liz is too scared to go to the police.
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5 out of 5 stars
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Fantastic!!
- By Brett McAteer on 03-06-19
By: Sinead Crowley
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The Brightest Star in the Sky
- A Novel
- By: Marian Keyes
- Narrated by: Caitriona Keyes
- Length: 17 hrs and 49 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall4 out of 5 stars 135
-
Performance4 out of 5 stars 76
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Story4 out of 5 stars 79
The Brightest Star in the Sky follows seven neighbors whose lives become entangled when a sassy and prescient spirit pays a visit to their Dublin townhouse with the intent of changing at least one of their lives. But what will this metamorphosis be and who will the sprite choose?
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1 out of 5 stars
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Terrible sound quality, worse narration
- By Jan on 02-23-10
By: Marian Keyes
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Killing Cupid
- By: Mark Edwards, Louise Voss
- Narrated by: Bea Holland, Oliver J. Hembrough
- Length: 9 hrs and 50 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall4 out of 5 stars 74
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Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 70
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Story4 out of 5 stars 71
Alex Parkinson is in love with his writing tutor, Siobhan. He has never loved anyone like this, but how can he convince Siobhan that they are meant to be together? So Alex stalks her on Facebook and finds out where she lives, buys her presents using her own credit card and sends her messages telling her exactly what he wants to do to her. He breaks into her house, reads her diary and secretly listens to her while she takes a bath. Isn't that what all lovers do?
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5 out of 5 stars
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Love conquers all
- By Jenny on 02-04-23
By: Mark Edwards, and others
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Lost for Words
- By: Stephanie Butland
- Narrated by: Imogen Church
- Length: 9 hrs and 3 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall4.5 out of 5 stars 242
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Performance5 out of 5 stars 222
-
Story4.5 out of 5 stars 221
Loveday Cardew prefers books to people, and her job in a York bookshop is her refuge. If you look carefully, you might see the first lines of the novels she loves the most tattooed on her skin, but there are secrets Loveday will never share. Into the bookshop come a poet, a lover, a friend and three mysterious deliveries, each of which stirs unsettling memories she wants to forget. Turning the pages of her past will be the hardest thing Loveday has ever done. Can she trust those around her?
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5 out of 5 stars
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Beautiful
- By J.Durant on 05-13-17
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The Third Wife
- A Novel
- By: Lisa Jewell
- Narrated by: Joe Jameson
- Length: 9 hrs and 22 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall4 out of 5 stars 3,343
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Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 3,029
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Story4 out of 5 stars 3,021
In the early hours of a summer morning, a young woman steps into the path of an oncoming bus. A tragic accident? Or suicide? At the center of this puzzle is Adrian Wolfe, a successful architect and grief-stricken widower, who, a year after his third wife's death, begins to investigate the cause. As Adrian looks back on their brief but seemingly happy marriage, disturbing secrets begin to surface. The divorces from his two previous wives had been amicable, or so it seemed; his children, all five of them, were resilient as ever, or so he thought.
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3 out of 5 stars
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Not a mystery
- By Susan on 07-06-18
By: Lisa Jewell
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The Bright Side Running Club
- By: Josie Lloyd
- Narrated by: Danielle Cohen
- Length: 11 hrs and 52 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall4.5 out of 5 stars 34
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Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 30
-
Story4.5 out of 5 stars 31
When Keira first receives her breast cancer diagnosis, she never expects to end up joining a running group with three women she’s only just met. Totally blindsided, all she can think about is how she doesn’t want to tell her family or step back from work. Nor does she want to be part of a group of fellow cancer patients. Cancer is not her club. And yet it’s running - hot, sweaty, Lycra-clad running in the company of brilliant, funny women all going through treatment - that unexpectedly gives Keira the hope she so urgently needs.
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2 out of 5 stars
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depressing
- By Jessica on 09-15-22
By: Josie Lloyd
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Frantic
- By: Katherine Howell
- Narrated by: Caroline Lee
- Length: 10 hrs and 44 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall4 out of 5 stars 145
-
Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 130
-
Story4 out of 5 stars 127
In one terrible moment, paramedic Sophie Phillips' life is ripped apart - her police officer husband is shot on their doorstep and their ten-month-old son is abducted from his bed. Suspicion surrounds her possibly corrupt husband, but Sophie believes the attack is much more personal. Sophie enlists her husband's partner in the hunt for her son, but will the history they share prove harmful to Sophie's ability to complete her mission?
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5 out of 5 stars
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Nice surprise
- By momgiraffe on 10-02-16
By: Katherine Howell
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Killing Kate
- By: Alex Lake
- Narrated by: Genevieve Swallow
- Length: 12 hrs and 11 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall4 out of 5 stars 160
-
Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 146
-
Story4 out of 5 stars 147
Kate returns from a post-break-up holiday with her girlfriends to news of a serial killer in her hometown - and his victims all look like her. It could, of course, be a simple coincidence. Or maybe not. She becomes convinced she is being watched, followed even. Is she next? And could her mild-mannered ex-boyfriend really be a deranged murderer? Or is the truth something far more sinister?
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4 out of 5 stars
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Decent suspense thriller makes the mark
- By Candice on 02-21-17
By: Alex Lake
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About a Girl
- By: Lindsey Kelk
- Narrated by: Penelope Rawlins
- Length: 13 hrs and 26 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall4.5 out of 5 stars 92
-
Performance4 out of 5 stars 82
-
Story4.5 out of 5 stars 83
The brand new summer bestseller from the immensely popular Lindsey KelkTess Brookes has always been a girl with a Plan. But when the Plan goes belly up, she’s forced to reconsider.After accidently answering her flatmate Vanessa’s phone, she decides that since being Tess isn’t going so well, she might try being Vanessa. With nothing left to lose, she accepts Vanessa’s photography assignment to Hawaii - she used to be an amateur snapper, how hard can it be? Right? But Tess is soon in big trouble.
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3 out of 5 stars
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Ahhh okay...
- By lzydaizy on 08-02-16
By: Lindsey Kelk
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The Playdate
- By: Louise Millar
- Narrated by: Clare Corbett
- Length: 9 hrs and 24 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall4 out of 5 stars 56
-
Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 48
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Story4 out of 5 stars 49
Single mother Callie has come to rely heavily on her best friend Suzy. But Callie suspects Suzy's life isn't as simple as it seems. It's time she pulled away - going back to work is just the first step towards rediscovering her old confidence. So why does she keep putting off telling Suzy about her new job? And who will care for her rather frail daughter, Rae, while she is gone?
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5 out of 5 stars
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Very Good
- By Delah on 05-03-12
By: Louise Millar
What listeners say about That's Your Lot
Average customer ratingsReviews - Please select the tabs below to change the source of reviews.
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Overall5 out of 5 stars
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Performance5 out of 5 stars
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Story5 out of 5 stars
- COCOA
- 05-15-17
Limmy 4 Life
Would you recommend this audiobook to a friend? If so, why?
I would absolutely recommend this book to a friend! It is hilarious and limmy is obviously pure genius.
What did you like best about this story?
I think all of them are great so its a hard one to choose but if I had too I would say my favorite part is that its multiple stores combined and you never get bored. I have already listened 10 times or more.
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