Take Back Your Brain

How a Sexist Society Gets in Your Head—and How to Get It Out

By: Kara Loewentheil

Narrated by: Kara Loewentheil

A manual for every woman who wants to stop endless negative self-talk, create unshakable confidence, and jump-start a life of joy and power. It all begins with your thoughts.

I never look good in tight skirts. I can’t ask for a raise or my boss will think I’m greedy. I’m getting too old to find a partner. I’m a bad mom. I’m always behind. I’ll never be good enough.

What if every time you had a self-critical thought, you heard it in a man’s voice? The truth is not far off. Living in a patriarchy, women absorb a lifetime of messages that say your worth is defined by your looks, your accomplishments, and how well you take care of everyone around you. In fact, these messages are so pervasive that, even knowing they exist, they still manage to program themselves into our brains. The result is that women end up feeling anxious, guilty, and vaguely ashamed of themselves no matter how much they do for others or achieve for themselves.

So how do we deprogram our thoughts from patriarchy’s corrosive influence? And once we do, how can we create new, self-empowering beliefs?

Master Certified Life Coach and host of the UnF*ck Your Brain podcast Kara Loewentheil knows how. Despite graduating from Harvard Law School and getting her dream job, Kara spent her twenties and thirties feeling insecure and anxious, until she learned how to change her thoughts—which led her to become a coach. In Take Back Your Brain, she draws on cognitive psychology, feminist theory, and years of experience as a neuroplasticity-focused coach to break down how the patriarchy hijacks women’s brains, and how women can get free. To bridge the gap between your inner voice and your true potential, she says, you must begin with your thoughts. By using the skills in this book to literally rewire your brain, you can create new thought patterns that will directly transform outcomes in your life.

Ultimately, Take Back Your Brain invites you to replace the thoughts that no longer serve you and make room for a kind of confidence you never thought possible. Because when women unleash their true power, they awaken new possibilities for the world.

* This audiobook edition includes a downloadable PDF that contains a QR code for access to the free Take Back Your Brain exercises guide.

PLEASE NOTE: When you purchase this title, the accompanying PDF will be available in your Audible Library along with the audio.

©2024 Kara Loewentheil (P)2024 Penguin Audio

Critic reviews

“Loewentheil’s galvanizing debut urges readers to close the gap between “feminist beliefs about our worth” and the “patriarchal social conditioning” that constrains them…Women will be motivated to tackle the invisible barriers holding them back.” —Publishers Weekly

"I freakin' love Kara Loewentheil. If you're a woman, there's a reason why you're not speaking up when you deserve to, why you're picking apart everything you think is wrong with your body, and why you're not in control of your money. You've internalized age-old messaging, and it's time to interrupt that sh*t once and for all. In your hands is a playbook that teaches you how. Do not put it down.” —Mel Robbins, author of the New York Times bestseller The High 5 Habit and host of The Mel Robbins Podcast

“Finally, there is a self-help book that contextualizes the voices in our head with the impossible social pressures and the outdated cultural norms that have feasted on our confidence for way too long. It’s not you, it’s them. But it’s also a little bit of you too . . . because of them! Kara Loewentheil unpacks us and unpacks them, all in an effort to help us get out of our own heads and into our best selves.” —Laura Gassner Otting, author of Wonderhell

100/10, HIGHLY RECOMMEND!

I’ve been listening to Kara Loewentheil’s podcast for years, so I knew this book would be good, but WOW! It’s a concise compilation of all her teachings in one handy place. I don’t know how she put so many concepts into such a short space of time and STILL made it so easy to follow - sorcery!

She explains why our thoughts are unhelpful, how they got there in the first place, and then provides practical, step-by-step ways to change them. Not only does she teach ground breaking concepts, she backs everything up with science, unpacks the big picture impact of socialization, and ties in smaller, everyday, relatable examples. Even though I’ve been following and practicing this work for years, she still dropped little mind blowing nuggets of wisdom that made this sooo worth the listen.

I love her no-nonsense, common sense approach and how she still explains things in a way that’s easy to receive. I am forever grateful for the tools she teachers and know this work has the power to change the world. It certainly has changed mine.

Required Reading

Life changing. The tools in this book will change every aspect of your life for the better. Kara leaves no stone unturned. The examples and stories make this work easy to understand and digest. If you’re a human with a human brain you need this book in your life.

Empowering for All Women; a Must Read!

This book is so empowering! I discovered many new ideas and concepts that will help me let go of a lot of pressure I've been putting on myself my whole life! Now I understand why I am such a perfectionist and how to use it like a superpower instead of a limitation. It is so intelligent, and offers so much to really think about, and re-think about. I want to give this book to all the women I love, especially my daughter and daughter-in-law!

This book will change your life!

This is amazing! As a woman you have no idea how many things and ideas and habits are subconsciously set up for you not to live your best life! Please read it, live it and share it!!!

Exceptionally easy to grasp and see how one can apply this powerful work.

Excellent! Every woman or individual raised as a one must read this book. Really. Please. Trust me. It will change your life, and it will do so for the best not just the better.

Forever changed.

Reading Kara’s book and listening to the audiobook has been such a journey of self discovery. I’ve shared this book with all the women in my life, I want everyone to know about this powerful work. I signed up to The Feminist Self Help Society and will never look back. It’s early days but I’m already learning so much and this work amplifies the work I’m doing with my therapist.
I can’t recommend this book and Kara’s work enough!!!

Illuminating & genuinely helpful

This book has given me both the social context & actionable frameworks to see into and start changing some of my most persistent and unhelpful thoughts. Plus Kara feels like the badass aunty we all want in our corner.

worth your time

For me, this was a great review because I am a coach that studied at the same life coach school. if you're fairly new to self improvement, this book offers great insights as well as practical action items to put the concepts to the test. Relatable examples of each concept were also very helpful. There is a little profanity, so be aware of that,

A must read for women and those who support them.

Her work is thorough and can be applied in all situations. I have been following her for 2 years and still gained so much insight and ideas to become who I am meant to be.

Kara changed my life

I’m not exaggerating or being hyperbolic - Kara’s work and teaching, which this book is the capstone of, changed every aspect of my life - my career, my business, my relationships (I found the best partner ever!) - but mostly, it changed my relationship with myself. Which sounds so trite and cheesy but like - just trust me. IT IS THE BEST!!