Self-Portrait with Nothing
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Self-Portrait with Nothing
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Narrated by:
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Jesse Vilinsky
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By:
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Aimee Pokwatka
About this listen
"Narrator Jesse Vilinsky creates plenty of suspense in this quirky mystery-sci-fi mix." - AudioFile Magazine
For fans of David Mitchell and Joanne Harris, Aimee Pokwatka's Self-Portrait with Nothing reminds us that living our best life sometimes means embracing the imperfect one we already have.
"Fraught and deeply moving...the work of a genuinely exciting new talent." —Booker Prize winner, George Saunders.
If a picture paints a thousand worlds . . .
Abandoned as an infant on the local veterinarian’s front porch, Pepper Rafferty was raised by two loving mothers, and now, at thirty-six is married to the stable, supportive Ike. She’s never told anyone that at fifteen she discovered the identity of her biological mother.
That’s because her birth mother is Ula Frost, a reclusive painter famous for the outrageous claims that her portraits summon their subjects’ doppelgängers from parallel universes.
Researching the rumors, Pepper couldn’t help but wonder: Is there a parallel universe in which she is more confident, more accomplished, better able to accept love?
A universe in which Ula decided she was worth keeping?
A universe in which Ula’s rejection didn’t still hurt too much to share?
Combining a thrilling pan-continental race against time with an authentic and touching personal drama, Self-Portrait with Nothing is an unforgettable debut that explores what it means to be part of a family.
A Macmillan Audio production from Tor.com.
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Critic reviews
“A thrillingly inventive, highly original debut that manages to be both a compelling mystery story and a dazzling meditation on existence. Pokwatka’s particular gift is her ability to see a strange concept through to its conclusion.” —Booker Prize winner, George Saunders
“Self-Portrait with Nothing is a thoughtful, beautiful contemplation on identity and how we build ourselves from all the bones we're given, both by the people who love us and by the people who leave us. How is this a first novel? Gorgeously drawn characters in a new and compelling setting, this is a beautiful book that deserves to be read.” —New York Times Bestseller, Seanan McGuire
“A beautiful debut about the people we aren’t and the paths we don’t pursue… Pokwatka’s voices are tantalizing and elusive. “ —New York Times
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Alcoholic PI
- By Karwyn on 05-17-18
By: Kristen Lepionka
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Lakewood
- A Novel
- By: Megan Giddings
- Narrated by: Adenrele Ojo
- Length: 8 hrs and 33 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall4 out of 5 stars 399
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Performance4 out of 5 stars 349
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Story3.5 out of 5 stars 350
When Lena Johnson’s beloved grandmother dies, and the full extent of the family debt is revealed, the Black millennial drops out of college to support her family and takes a job in the mysterious and remote town of Lakewood, Michigan. On paper, her new job is too good to be true. High paying. No out of pocket medical expenses. A free place to live. All Lena has to do is participate in a secret program - and lie to her friends and family about the research being done in Lakewood.
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5 out of 5 stars
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Fact or Fiction
- By Penda K on 06-09-20
By: Megan Giddings
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Serious Moonlight
- By: Jenn Bennett
- Narrated by: Devon Sorvari
- Length: 12 hrs and 4 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall4.5 out of 5 stars 52
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Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 46
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Story4 out of 5 stars 46
Mystery-book aficionado Birdie Lindberg has an overactive imagination. Raised in isolation and homeschooled by strict grandparents, she's cultivated a whimsical fantasy life in which she plays the heroic detective and every stranger is a suspect. But her solitary world expands when she takes a job the summer before college, working the graveyard shift at a historic Seattle hotel. In her new job, Birdie hopes to blossom from introverted dreamer to brave pioneer, and gregarious Daniel Aoki volunteers to be her guide.
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5 out of 5 stars
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Great characters wrapped in a mystery inside a romance
- By cheryl anderson on 07-11-19
By: Jenn Bennett
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Inherit the Bones
- A Detective Gemma Monroe Mystery, Book 1
- By: Emily Littlejohn
- Narrated by: Harper Landry
- Length: 11 hrs and 27 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall4.5 out of 5 stars 139
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Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 118
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Story4.5 out of 5 stars 117
Secrets and lies can’t stay buried forever in Cedar Valley. In the summer, hikers and campers pack the small Colorado town’s meadows and fields. And in the winter, skiers and snowboarders take over the mountains. Season by season, year after year, time passes, and the lies, like the aspens and evergreens that surround the town, take root and spread deep. Now, someone has uncovered the lies, and it is his murder that continues a chain of events that began almost 40 years ago.
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5 out of 5 stars
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intriguing
- By Anonymous User on 06-26-19
By: Emily Littlejohn
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We Are All Completely Fine
- By: Daryl Gregory
- Narrated by: Tavia Gilbert
- Length: 4 hrs and 14 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall4 out of 5 stars 202
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Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 184
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Story4 out of 5 stars 183
Harrison is the Monster Detective, a storybook hero. Now he’s in his mid-30s and spends most of his time not sleeping. Stan became a minor celebrity after being partially eaten by cannibals. Barbara is haunted by the messages carved upon her bones. Greta may or may not be a mass-murdering arsonist. And for some reason, Martin never takes off his sunglasses.
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4 out of 5 stars
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original and unique
- By Midwestbonsai on 03-22-15
By: Daryl Gregory
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If Walls Could Talk
- Haunted Home Renovation, Book 1
- By: Juliet Blackwell
- Narrated by: Xe Sands
- Length: 7 hrs and 27 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall4 out of 5 stars 1,758
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Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 1,587
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Story4 out of 5 stars 1,579
Melanie Turner has made quite a name for herself remodeling historic houses in the San Francisco Bay Area. But now her reputation may be on the line. At her newest project, a run-down Pacific Heights mansion, Mel is visited by the ghost of a colleague who recently met a bad end with power tools. Mel hopes that by nailing the killer, she can rid herself of the ghostly presence of the murdered man - and not end up a construction casualty herself....
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3 out of 5 stars
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A Nice Change
- By Carole T. on 06-15-15
By: Juliet Blackwell
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No One Knows Us Here
- A Novel
- By: Rebecca Kelley
- Narrated by: Merritt Hicks
- Length: 10 hrs and 45 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall4 out of 5 stars 137
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Performance4 out of 5 stars 124
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Story3.5 out of 5 stars 122
Rosemary Rabourne is already struggling to pay the bills when her recently orphaned half sister, Wendy, shows up at her door. Rosemary will try anything to provide for the traumatized teenager—including offering her services as a high-end escort. Leo Glass is the billionaire CEO of a revolutionary social app. He wants the “girlfriend experience”—someone contractually obligated to love him—and he thinks he’s found the perfect match in Rosemary.
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3 out of 5 stars
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Good but not uplifting story
- By Kim on 08-02-23
By: Rebecca Kelley
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Call Down the Hawk (The Dreamer Trilogy, Book 1)
- By: Maggie Stiefvater
- Narrated by: Will Patton
- Length: 13 hrs and 45 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall4.5 out of 5 stars 890
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Performance5 out of 5 stars 800
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Story4.5 out of 5 stars 797
Ronan Lynch is a dreamer. He can pull both curiosities and catastrophes out of his dreams and into his compromised reality. Jordan Hennessy is a thief. The closer she comes to the dream object she is after, the more inextricably she becomes tied to it. Carmen Farooq-Lane is a hunter. Her brother was a dreamer...and a killer. She has seen what dreaming can do to a person. And she has seen the damage that dreamers can do. But that is nothing compared to the destruction that is about to be unleashed....
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5 out of 5 stars
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Unlistenable
- By Nathan Parker on 11-24-19
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56 Days
- By: Catherine Ryan Howard
- Narrated by: Alana Kerr Collins
- Length: 10 hrs and 39 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall4.5 out of 5 stars 1,135
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Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 1,015
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Story4.5 out of 5 stars 1,016
Ciara and Oliver meet in a supermarket queue in Dublin and start dating the same week COVID-19 reaches Irish shores. When lockdown threatens to keep them apart, Oliver suggests they move in together. Ciara sees a unique opportunity for a relationship to flourish without the scrutiny of family and friends. Oliver sees a chance to hide who - and what - he really is.
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3 out of 5 stars
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A bit disappointing
- By SB on 08-18-21
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The Vanishing Season
- By: Joanna Schaffhausen
- Narrated by: Lauren Fortgang
- Length: 8 hrs and 58 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall4.5 out of 5 stars 128
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Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 118
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Story4.5 out of 5 stars 119
Ellery Hathaway knows a thing or two about serial killers, but not through her police training. She's an officer in sleepy Woodbury, Massachusetts, where a bicycle theft still makes the newspapers. No one there knows she was once victim number 17 in the grisly story of serial killer Francis Michael Coben. The only victim who lived. When three people disappear from her town in three years, all around her birthday - the day she was kidnapped so long ago - Ellery fears someone knows her secret. Someone very dangerous.
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5 out of 5 stars
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Engaging mystery debut!
- By robbie mcgraw on 06-15-18
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When a Stranger Comes to Town
- By: Michael Koryta
- Narrated by: Cindy Kay, Janina Edwards, Fajer Al-Kaisi, and others
- Length: 11 hrs and 39 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall4 out of 5 stars 56
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Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 53
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Story4 out of 5 stars 53
It's been said that all great literature boils down to one of two stories—a man takes a journey, or a stranger comes to town. While mystery writers have been successfully using both approaches for generations, there's something undeniably alluring in the nature of a stranger: the uninvited guest, the unacquainted neighbor, the fish out of water. In the newest collection of stories by the Mystery Writers of America, each author weaves a fresh tale surrounding the eerie feeling that comes when a stranger enters our midst, featuring stories by prolific mystery writers.
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5 out of 5 stars
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The narrators are outstanding here.
- By Jennifer Baratta She/Her on 05-16-21
By: Michael Koryta
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Lola Is Missing
- By: Alison James
- Narrated by: Jan Cramer
- Length: 8 hrs and 44 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall4.5 out of 5 stars 195
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Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 168
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Story4.5 out of 5 stars 167
Six-year-old Lola Jade Harper is taken from her bedroom. Her mother is distraught. She is convinced her estranged husband, Gavin Harper, has abducted their daughter. Detective Rachel Prince is leading the investigation but is soon out of her depth as she searches for the most high-profile missing child in the country. To uncover the truth about Lola’s disappearance, Rachel must untangle the Harper family’s complicated web of secrets and lies.
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4 out of 5 stars
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Very good!
- By Maine Knitter on 02-16-19
By: Alison James
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The Scent of Murder
- The Jazz Ramsey Mysteries, Book 1
- By: Kylie Logan
- Narrated by: Emily Pike Stewart
- Length: 8 hrs and 11 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall4 out of 5 stars 60
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Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 51
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Story4 out of 5 stars 52
The way Jazz Ramsey figures it, life is pretty good. She is 35 years old and owns her own home in one of Cleveland's most diverse, artsy, and interesting neighborhoods. She has a job she likes as an administrative assistant at an all-girls school and a volunteer interest that she's passionate about - Jazz is a cadaver dog handler. Jazz is working with Luther, a cadaver dog in training. Luther is still learning cadaver work, so Jazz is putting him through his paces at an abandoned building. When Luther signals a find, Jazz is stunned to see the body of a young woman.
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2 out of 5 stars
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The cover is a sham. Dogs not involved.
- By Horse Rider on 06-21-21
By: Kylie Logan
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He Came in with It
- A Portrait of Motherhood and Madness
- By: Miriam Feldman
- Narrated by: Ann Richardson
- Length: 11 hrs and 4 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall4.5 out of 5 stars 63
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Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 57
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Story4.5 out of 5 stars 56
In an idyllic Los Angeles neighborhood, where generations enjoy deep roots in old homes, the O’Rourke family fits right in. Miriam and Craig are both artists and their four children carry on the legacy. When their teenage son, Nick, is diagnosed with schizophrenia, a tumultuous decade ensues in which the family careens off the conventional course. Like the 10 Biblical plagues, they are hit by one catastrophe after another: violence, evictions, arrests, a suicide attempt, a near-drowning - even cancer and a brain tumor - play against the backdrop of a wild teenage bacchanal.
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5 out of 5 stars
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So Beautifully Written
- By Michael on 08-01-22
By: Miriam Feldman
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The Secret, Book & Scone Society
- Booktrack Edition
- By: Ellery Adams
- Narrated by: Cris Dukehart
- Length: 8 hrs and 31 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall4 out of 5 stars 183
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Performance4 out of 5 stars 164
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Story4 out of 5 stars 159
Miracle Springs is a place of healing. Strangers flock there hoping the natural hot springs, five-star cuisine, and renowned spa can cure their ills. And, if none of that works, they often find their way to Miracle Books, where, over a fresh-baked scone from the Gingerbread House bakery, they exchange their stories with owner Nora Pennington in return for a carefully chosen book. That's Nora's special talent. But when a visiting businessman reaches out to Nora for guidance, he's found dead on the train tracks before he can keep their appointment.
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3 out of 5 stars
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Music?
- By Brinkley on 12-29-18
By: Ellery Adams
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The Gun Also Rises
- A Sarah Winston Garage Sale Mystery
- By: Sherry Harris
- Narrated by: Hillary Huber
- Length: 7 hrs and 45 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall4.5 out of 5 stars 69
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Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 61
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Story4.5 out of 5 stars 61
A wealthy widow has asked Sarah Winston to sell her massive collection of mysteries through her garage-sale business. While sorting through piles of books stashed in the woman's attic, Sarah is amazed to discover a case of lost Hemingway stories, stolen from a train in Paris back in 1922. How did they end up in Belle Winthrop Granville's attic in Ellington, Massachusetts, almost 100 years later? Before Sarah can get any answers, Belle is assaulted, the case is stolen, a maid is killed, and Sarah herself is dodging bullets.
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5 out of 5 stars
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Doesn't disappoint!
- By ConawayMom on 04-09-21
By: Sherry Harris
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Tagged for Death
- A Sarah Winston Garage Sale Mystery
- By: Sherry Harris
- Narrated by: Hillary Huber
- Length: 8 hrs and 4 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall4.5 out of 5 stars 104
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Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 96
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Story4.5 out of 5 stars 95
Starting your life over at age 38 isn't easy, but that's what Sarah Winston finds herself facing when her husband CJ runs off with a 19-year-old temptress named Tiffany. Sarah's self-prescribed therapy happily involves hitting all the garage and tag sales in and around her small town in Massachusetts. But after returning from a particularly successful day searching for yard-sale treasures, Sarah finds a grisly surprise in one of her bags: a freshly bloodied shirt...that undoubtedly belongs to her ex, CJ, who now happens to be Ellington's chief of police. And Tiffany has gone missing.
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3 out of 5 stars
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frustrating book
- By Anonymous User on 01-08-23
By: Sherry Harris
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They Did Bad Things
- By: Lauren A. Forry
- Narrated by: Claire Storey
- Length: 9 hrs and 36 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall4 out of 5 stars 43
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Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 39
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Story4 out of 5 stars 39
In 1995, six university students moved into the house at 215 Caldwell Street. Months later, one of them was found dead on the sofa the morning after their end-of-year party. His death was ruled an accident by the police. The remaining five all knew it wasn’t, and though they went on with their lives, the truth of what happened to their sixth housemate couldn’t stay buried forever. Twenty years later, all five of them arrive - lured separately under various pretenses - at Wolfheather House, a crumbling, secluded mansion on the Scottish isle of Doon.
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5 out of 5 stars
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Impressed
- By Amazon Customer on 01-19-21
By: Lauren A. Forry
What listeners say about Self-Portrait with Nothing
Average customer ratingsReviews - Please select the tabs below to change the source of reviews.
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Overall3 out of 5 stars
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Performance4 out of 5 stars
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Story2 out of 5 stars
- PE
- 09-24-23
Not great
The reading of this story was good, but the story itself disappointing. If I took a drink every time the book said “another universe in which” I would be dead. Motivations of characters were unclear, and our main character, Pepper, seemed unrealistically thick. The overall concept of this story is very creative - paintings that bring people closer to other universes - but the execution was underwhelming.
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