Romancing the Shadow: Illuminating the Dark Side of the Soul

By: Connie Zweig, Steve Wolf

Narrated by: Dr. Connie Zweig, Dr. Steve Wolf

"One does not become enlightened by imagining figures of light but by making the darkness conscious." (C. G. Jung)

Within each woman and man, the dim cavern of the unconscious holds our forbidden feelings, secret wishes, and creative urges. Over time, these "dark" forces take on a life of their own, forming an intuitively recognizable figure - the shadow. A recurring theme in literature and legend, the shadow is like an invisible twin, a stranger that is us yet is not us. When it acts out in the public domain, we witness our leaders, like hero-villains, fall from grace in scandal. Closer to home, we may feel overcome with rage, obsession, and shame or succumb to self-destructive lies, addiction, or depression. These appearances of the shadow introduce us to the Other, a powerful force that defies our efforts to tame and control it.

Steve Wolf, PhD, and Connie Zweig, PhD, innovators in the use of shadow-work in psychotherapy, have helped hundreds of clients in their encounters with the dark side. Seeing it - meeting the shadow - is a first step. Learning to live with it - romancing the shadow - is a lifelong challenge. It means reading the messages encoded in the events of daily life in such a way that we gain consciousness, substance, and soul. In fact, shadow-work is soul work.

With shadow-work, we cultivate a deeper self-knowledge and authenticity. When we identify family shadow patterns, we move toward cultivating family soul. When we untangle romantic projections, we begin to build the soul of a relationship. When we face descent at midlife and meet the underworld shadow, we reclaim the unlived life of the soul. And when we retrieve our lost vitality and creative fertility - the gold in the dark side - we nurture the hungry soul.

©1997 Connie Zweig and Steve Wolf (P)2018 Connie Zweig and Steve Wolf

Good story… But…

It was good story with plenty food for thought. Narrators are a bit annoying however.

Good introduction to the shadow

I thought they did a good job of going through
and explaining the concept of the shadow. It was complicated but I retained enough to be happy.

Not what I expected.

Romancing the Shadow, while well written and performed, was not helpful to me. It's focus is very specifically identifying and working through shadow as it appears in relationships: familial, dating, and committed relationships. The archetypes referred to are too textbook and limited. If you are looking to identify and work through shadow as it appears in your relationships with others, then this book may be helpful.

I, however, was looking for help to do shadow work within myself, bridging between soul and Self as the authors call it, but not in context of external relationships. This book did not have examples or discuss archetypes that were of use to me.

profound

amazing and a great introduction to shadow work for individuals and couples. start here !

Performance detracts from the content

I found i needed to buy the book in order to actually use the information and the insights. The reading is just reading what was written-not conveying the actual meaning of the work.

so interesting I finished it in one sitting

This audiobook is short, but it was so captivating that I finished it in one sitting even after countless Jungian audiobooks I listened to in the past.

Great listen for seeing some patterns

Great listen for seeing some patterns of behavior in people around you and within yourself. Good length and well worth the cost of admission. I have listened to it 3 times, which is not typical for me, but I get this. I went through a divorce and found yoga to be my only rescue from drugs and alcohol. I never really understood the root of repeating patterns in relationships that I was doing all my life, Reading this helped me realize breathing and ching my thoughts to a different Glad to have this in my library to share :-)

Darth Vader would've appreciated this....

Very interesting. Will listen to more than thrice. Shines a light on a not so often spoken of subject.

Had to write this review

This is my first review after nearly 100 audibles. This book has incredibly fresh insights into our behavior, unconscious and conscious.

As a recovering victim of many such addictions, parental abuse, and other impactful developmental factors, this book clearly lays out causes, both direct and indirect of what causes us to act in what we commonly say as “out of character”, and experience a level of shame.

The truth is- we all have these moments, but like the author says, this “lighting of the candles” of the mind will help you romance your shadow and ultimately, bring your self identity and shadow identity closer in sync.

Required Reading

I have been through a lot of therapy in my time on earth but this 3-hour audio book is probably more illuminating than the hundreds spent in the chair.

I’ll be referencing this for the rest of my life as I continue to romance my shadow.