Not My Father's Son

A Family Memoir

By: Alan Cumming

Narrated by: Alan Cumming

Alan Cumming grew up in the grip of a man who held his family hostage, someone who meted out violence with a frightening ease, who waged a silent war with himself that sometimes spilled over onto everyone around him. That man was Alan's father, Alex Cumming.

Alex was the dark, enigmatic heart of Cumming family life. But he was not the only mystery. Alan's maternal grandfather, Tommy Darling, had disappeared to the Far East after the Second World War. The last time Alan's mother saw her father she was eight years old. When she was 13, the family was informed that he had died in an accidental shooting.

Curious to explore this second mystery, Alan committed to filming an episode of the BBC's Who Do You Think You Are? Then out of the blue, his father, who Alan and his brother had not seen or spoken to for more than a decade, called. He had a secret he had to share, one that would shock his son to his very core and set in motion a journey that would change Alan's life forever.

At times suspenseful, at times deeply moving, but always brave and honest, Not My Father's Son is a powerful story about embracing the best aspects of the past and triumphantly pushing the darkness aside.

©2014 Alan Cumming (P)2014 Canongate Books Ltd

Critic reviews

"Equal parts memoir, whodunnit and manual for living, Not My Father's Son is a beautifully written, honest look at the forces of blood and bone that make us what we are, and how we make ourselves. I was completely sucked in." (Neil Gaiman)
"What a shattering, compelling and extraordinary story Alan Cumming has to tell. And he does so with such style and grace . . . Beautifully and cunningly structured, Not My Father's Son is one of the most memorable, heart-stopping autobiographies I have ever read." (Stephen Fry)
"Do you know the old line "I laughed, I cried, it became a part of me"? Alan Cumming's moving memoir Not My Father's Son is all that and more. This is a beautiful book-sad, funny, haunting, surprising, suspenseful, gut-wrenching, endearing. It will linger inside of you long after you turn the final page." (Harlan Coben, author of New York Times bestsellers Missing You and Six Years)
"In beautiful, honest, arresting prose, he offers a tale you'll never forget. A real diamond of a book." (Andrew O'Hagan)
"A clear-eyed, often moving account of both his terrifying childhood and his recent attempts to come to terms with his past [. . .] Not My Father's Son moves elegantly and with an occasional dash of humour between Cumming's childhood and the revelations of the more recent past [. . .] memorable." ( Chicago Tribune)
"One of the most fun people in show business" ( Time)
"Cumming's eccentric style and assured voice shine brightly on every page, while escorting readers and fans on a memorable journey that is simultaneously insightful, brave, moving, and witty." ( Book List)

"Equal parts memoir, whodunnit and manual for living, Not My Father's Son is a beautifully written, honest look at the forces of blood and bone that make us what we are, and how we make ourselves. I was completely sucked in." (Neil Gaiman)

"What a shattering, compelling and extraordinary story Alan Cumming has to tell. And he does so with such style and grace.... Beautifully and cunningly structured, Not My Father's Son is one of the most memorable, heart-stopping autobiographies I have ever read." (Stephen Fry)

"Do you know the old line 'I laughed, I cried, it became a part of me?' Alan Cumming's moving memoir Not My Father's Son is all that and more. This is a beautiful book-sad, funny, haunting, surprising, suspenseful, gut-wrenching, endearing. It will linger inside of you long after you turn the final page." (Harlan Coben, author of New York Times best sellers Missing You and Six Years)

Beautiful

The first few chapters are off putting. I thought here we go, tragiic native followed by hard work and success. Standard script of celebrities. I did not need the dark chapters that would follow but I stuck with it.
Brilliant, moving, real and I truly love this production. I have been very lucky never to experience anything like Mr Cummins has but he is brilliant telling the story. I thank him for sharing his life. I wish I could get to know him more but that is not to be.

Enjoyable

I really enjoyed this book. Alan's voice is very easy to listen to and as I didn't know much about his life, I was surprised at each new chapter. I only really knew him from The Good Wife

Wonderful

A wonderful moving book that navigates the pain of abuse and the joy of love, life and family. I have loved Alan Cumming as a character actor I now love him as a person. A beautiful book.

This book is honest and touching

This books explains abuse and the effects of abuse in the most honest way. It sheds light on the dark places. It exposes and reveal the unspoken in the most beautiful and strangely caring way. The scariest thing about abuse is the silence that follows. It's the silence that makes it commonplace and acceptable. Allan Cumming is a courageous man

Loved it

Fantastic story, beautifully written and read by the man himself. Only criticism I would make is that it feels a bit like a narration of an episode of who do you think you are but of course there are added dimensions. Really enjoyed this book and the insight into such an interesting person.

A really great book, from start to finish

What a heartfelt story. Mary Darling - such a beautiful beautiful name. Thank you Alan.

Something in this book for everyone

This is a book for anyone who has grown up with an abusive parent, anyone who loves a mystery, all those researching their family history, and everyone who has despaired and found the way back or is still looking for the way back. And for anyone who just likes a well-written entertaining read, with tears and laughter along the way. Congratulations to Alan Cumming for so openly documenting the milestones in his life, from his harrowing childhood to his eventual discovery of what is best left in his past and what he can take into the future. The story is beautifully told, the ‘then’ and ‘now’ format perfect for unfolding the inevitably converging dramas, introducing new facts as they come to light in the ‘now’ chapters, all the while maintaining the tension in the build up to the denouement. The book is all the better for being narrated by the author who conveys all the emotions associated with the story, and his soft Scots accent is delightful. Thanks, Alan, I suspect a lot of readers will be inspired by your story.

Very inspiring and moving

This book is brave, difficult and inspiring. The difficulty lies in the experiences described and the powerlessness experienced. The bravery and inspiration arises from Alan Cummings responses in coming to terms with this trauma. This is a book worth reading.