Milking the Cat
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Milking the Cat
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Narrated by:
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Theophanes Avery
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By:
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Theophanes Avery
About this listen
Milking the Cat is a tongue-in-cheek collection of animal-related tales as recounted by a pet owner, former breeder, and farmer in New England. Each story revolves around the funny and absurd winding the listener into increasingly ridiculous situations. From naked cats, to psychopathic cockatoos, to lovesick horses, and misplaced bats, you'll find it all here.
Content Warning: Some colorful language, brief mentions of puppy mills, dive pet stores, and less than stellar vets. Dark humor pertaining to common agricultural practices non-farmers may find shocking or offensive.
©2020 Theophanes Avery (P)2023 Theophanes AveryListeners also enjoyed...
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Performance4 out of 5 stars 57
-
Story4 out of 5 stars 58
Julie Klam was 30, single, and working as a part-time clerk in an insurance company, wondering if she would ever meet the man she could spend the rest of her life with. And then it happened. She met the irresistible Otto, her first in a long line of Boston terriers, and fell instantly in love. You Had Me at Woof is the often hilarious and always sincere story of how one woman discovered life's most important lessons from her relationships with her canine companions.
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2 out of 5 stars
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dog lover in virginia
- By Margaret on 01-17-11
By: Julie Klam
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A Small Furry Prayer
- Dog Rescue and the Meaning of Life
- By: Steven Kotler
- Narrated by: Kevin Foley
- Length: 9 hrs and 14 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall4 out of 5 stars 87
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Performance4 out of 5 stars 74
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Story4 out of 5 stars 74
Steven Kotler was 40 years old, single, and facing an existential crisis when he met Lila, a woman devoted to animal rescue. "Love me, love my dogs" was her rule, and Steven took it to heart. Spurred to move by a housing crisis in Los Angeles, Steven, Lila, and their eight dogs - then 10, then 20, and then they lost count - bought a postage-stamp-size farm in Chimayo, New Mexico....
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5 out of 5 stars
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Great book
- By Shirley on 08-29-11
By: Steven Kotler
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Dogtripping
- 25 Rescues, 11 Volunteers, and 3 RVs on Our Canine Cross-Country Adventure
- By: David Rosenfelt
- Narrated by: Jeff Steitzer
- Length: 7 hrs and 23 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall4.5 out of 5 stars 357
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Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 315
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Story4.5 out of 5 stars 316
When best-selling mystery writer David Rosenfelt and his family moved from Southern California to Maine, he thought he had prepared for everything. They had mapped the route, brought three GPSs for backup, as well as refrigerators full of food, and stoves and microwaves on which to cook them. But traveling with 25 dogs turned out to be a bigger ordeal than he anticipated, despite RVs, the extra kibble, volunteers (including a few readers), and camping equipment.
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3 out of 5 stars
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Only about 1 hour of the book is about the trip
- By Gretchen on 10-29-13
By: David Rosenfelt
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Wesley the Owl
- The Remarkable Love Story of an Owl and His Girl
- By: Stacey O'Brien
- Narrated by: Renée Raudman
- Length: 6 hrs and 52 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall4.5 out of 5 stars 246
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Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 207
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Story5 out of 5 stars 206
Written with the same heartwarming sentiment that made the memoir Marley & Me a runaway best seller, biologist and owl expert Stacey O'Brien chronicles her rescue of an adorable, abandoned baby barn owl - and their astonishing and unprecedented 19-year life together.
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1 out of 5 stars
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Maybe good for children
- By Michael on 12-15-08
By: Stacey O'Brien
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Sheepish
- Two Women, Fifty Sheep, and Enough Wool to Save the Planet
- By: Catherine Friend
- Narrated by: Erin Bennett
- Length: 7 hrs and 3 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall4.5 out of 5 stars 134
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Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 115
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Story4.5 out of 5 stars 115
What do you do when you love your farm...but it doesn’t love you? After 15 years of farming, Catherine Friend is tired. After all, while shepherding is one of the oldest professions, it’s not getting any easier. The number of sheep in America has fallen by 90 percent in the last 90 years. But just as Catherine thinks it’s time to hang up her shepherd’s crook, she discovers that sheep might be too valuable to give up. What ensues is a funny, thoughtful romp through the history of our woolly friends, why small farms are important, and how each one of us - and the planet - would benefit from being very sheepish, indeed.
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3 out of 5 stars
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We're all a little sheepish
- By Pam on 12-23-14
By: Catherine Friend
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My Life in Dog Years
- By: Gary Paulsen
- Narrated by: Gary Paulsen
- Length: 1 hr and 44 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall4.5 out of 5 stars 197
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Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 164
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Story4.5 out of 5 stars 165
Gary Paulsen has owned dozens of unforgettable and amazing dogs. In each chapter he tells of one special dog, among them Cookie, the sled dog who saved his life; Snowball, the puppy he owned as a boy in the Philippines; Ike, his mysterious hunting companion; Dirk, the grim protector; and his true friend Josh, a brilliant border collie.
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5 out of 5 stars
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Gary Paulsen’s My life with Dogs is hysterical
- By A Holly Winter Mystery on 01-04-19
By: Gary Paulsen
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Animals in Translation
- Using the Mysteries of Autism to Decode Animal Behavior
- By: Temple Grandin, Catherine Johnson
- Narrated by: Andrea Gallo
- Length: 14 hrs and 30 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall4.5 out of 5 stars 325
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Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 285
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Story4.5 out of 5 stars 285
Temple Grandin’s professional training as an animal scientist and her history as a person with autism have given her a perspective like that of no other expert in the field. Grandin and coauthor Catherine Johnson present their powerful theory that autistic people can often think the way animals think—putting autistic people in the perfect position to translate “animal talk.”
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4 out of 5 stars
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Wonderful, but I have a bone to pick...
- By Tango on 05-06-13
By: Temple Grandin, and others
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Cat Daddy
- What the World's Most Incorrigible Cat Taught Me About Life, Love, and Coming Clean
- By: Jackson Galaxy, Joel Derfner
- Narrated by: Jackson Galaxy
- Length: 6 hrs and 24 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall4.5 out of 5 stars 1,106
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Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 1,018
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Story4.5 out of 5 stars 1,018
In this book, Galaxy tells the poignant story of his 13-year relationship with a petite gray-and-white short-haired cat named Benny, and gives singular advice for living with, caring for, and loving the feline in your home. When Benny arrived in his life, Galaxy was a down-and-out rock musician with not too much more going on than a part-time job at an animal shelter and a drug problem. Benny's previous owner brought the cat to the shelter in a cardboard box to give him up.
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5 out of 5 stars
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10 Stars!!!
- By Dawn J on 12-04-12
By: Jackson Galaxy, and others
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The Farmer's Son
- Calving Season on a Family Farm
- By: John Connell
- Narrated by: Alan Smyth
- Length: 7 hrs and 56 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall4 out of 5 stars 40
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Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 32
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Story4.5 out of 5 stars 32
Farming has been in John Connell's family for generations, but he never intended to follow in his father's footsteps. Until, one winter, after more than a decade away, he finds himself back on the farm. Connell records the hypnotic rhythm of the farming day - cleaning the barns, caring for the herd, tending to sickly lambs, helping the cows give birth. Alongside the routine events, there are the unforeseen moments when things go wrong: when a calf fails to thrive, when a sheep goes missing, when an argument between father and son erupts and things are said that cannot be unsaid.
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5 out of 5 stars
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Beautiful.
- By Kindle Customer on 05-22-19
By: John Connell
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What the Animals Tell Me
- By: Sonya Fitzpatrick
- Narrated by: Carol Irwin
- Length: 9 hrs and 50 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall4.5 out of 5 stars 32
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Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 29
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Story4.5 out of 5 stars 29
If you could talk to your pet, what would it say to you? How do animals communicate with people? And what's the best way for people to communicate with animals? In this insightful audiobook, renowned pet psychic Sonya Fitpatrick teaches listeners about the secrets of the animal world and how to learn the telepathic language of animals. Dogs, cats, reptiles, horses and wild animals of kinds have a story to tell.
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1 out of 5 stars
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Total Fake
- By kortega on 09-02-23
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Beautiful Joe
- By: Margaret Marshall Saunders
- Narrated by: John Michaels
- Length: 8 hrs and 13 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall4.5 out of 5 stars 49
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Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 41
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Story4.5 out of 5 stars 42
First published in 1893 as a children's book to encourage the humane treatment of animals, Beautiful Joe has taken it's place along with Black Beauty, becoming a favorite of several generations of youngsters. Beautiful Joe narrates the story of his mutilation at the hands of a cruel master and the love he finds in the home of a caring family full of kids and animals.
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5 out of 5 stars
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My Appeeciation
- By Linda Niebanck on 04-28-17
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The World's Largest Man
- A Memoir
- By: Harrison Scott Key
- Narrated by: Harrison Scott Key
- Length: 9 hrs and 4 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall5 out of 5 stars 204
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Performance5 out of 5 stars 190
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Story5 out of 5 stars 190
Harrison Scott Key was born in Memphis, but he grew up in Mississippi, among pious, Bible-reading women and men who either shot things or got women pregnant. At the center of his world was his larger-than-life father - a hunter, a fighter, and a football coach. Harrison, with his love of books and excessive interest in hugging, couldn't have been less like Pop, and when it became clear that he was not able to kill anything very well or otherwise make his father happy, he resolved to become everything his father was not.
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5 out of 5 stars
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I laughed every day to and from work. Loved it!
- By KufRN on 06-06-18
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Afield
- American Writers on Bird Dogs
- By: David Smith - editor, Robert Demott - editor
- Narrated by: Bryan Brendle
- Length: 9 hrs and 32 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall4.5 out of 5 stars 30
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Performance4 out of 5 stars 27
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Story5 out of 5 stars 27
This marvelous collection features stories from some of America’s finest and most respected writers about every outdoorsman’s favorite and most loyal hunting partner: his dog. For the first time, the stories of acclaimed writers such as Richard Ford, Tom Brokaw, Howell Raines, Rick Bass, Sydney Lea, Jim Harrison, Tom McGuane, Phil Caputo, and Chris Camuto come together in one collection. Hunters and non-hunters alike will recognize in these poignant tales the universal aspects of owning dogs.
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3 out of 5 stars
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Great stories. Poor performance.
- By Paul on 12-09-17
By: David Smith - editor, and others
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London's Number One Dog-Walking Agency
- A Memoir
- By: Kate MacDougall
- Narrated by: Anna Popplewell
- Length: 9 hrs and 22 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall4 out of 5 stars 75
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Performance5 out of 5 stars 65
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Story4.5 out of 5 stars 65
In 2006, Kate MacDougall was working a safe but dull job at the venerable auction house Sotheby’s in London. After a clumsy accident nearly destroyed a precious piece of art, she quit Sotheby’s and set up her own dog-walking company. Kate knew little about dogs and nothing about business, and no one thought being a professional dog walker was a good use of her university degree. Nevertheless, Kate embarked upon an entirely new and very much improvised career walking some of the city’s many pampered pooches, branding her company "London's Number One Dog Walking Agency".
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5 out of 5 stars
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Entertaining light read
- By Amy D. on 07-10-21
By: Kate MacDougall
What listeners say about Milking the Cat
Average customer ratingsReviews - Please select the tabs below to change the source of reviews.
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Overall5 out of 5 stars
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Performance5 out of 5 stars
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Story5 out of 5 stars
- Theophanes Avery
- 05-29-23
great read
Great read. Lots of indoor and outdoor critter stories both big and small, with and without fur.
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