Leaving the Witness

Exiting a Religion and Finding a Life

By: Amber Scorah

Narrated by: Amber Scorah

"À la Tara Westover's Educated, Scorah's pensive, ultimately liberating memoir chronicles her formative years as a Jehovah's Witness...and captures the bewilderment of belief and the bliss of self-discovery...[Leaving the Witness] is a suture for anyone searching to reconcile their past and present selves." (O, The Oprah Magazine - named one of "The Best Books by Women of Summer 2019")

"Scorah's book, the bravery of which cannot be overstated, is an earnest one, fueled by a plucky humor and a can-do spirit that endears. Her tale, though an exploration of extremity, is highly readable and warm." (The New York Times Book Review)

A riveting memoir of losing faith and finding freedom while a covert missionary in one of the world's most restrictive countries.

A third-generation Jehovah's Witness, Amber Scorah had devoted her life to sounding God's warning of impending Armageddon. She volunteered to take the message to China, where the preaching she did was illegal and could result in her expulsion or worse. Here, she had some distance from her community for the first time. Immersion in a foreign language and culture - and a whole new way of thinking - turned her world upside down, and eventually led her to lose all that she had been sure was true.

As a proselytizer in Shanghai, using fake names and secret codes to evade the authorities' notice, Scorah discreetly looked for targets in public parks and stores. To support herself, she found work at a Chinese language learning podcast, hiding her real purpose from her coworkers. Now with a creative outlet, getting to know worldly people for the first time, she began to understand that there were other ways of seeing the world and living a fulfilling life. When one of these relationships became an "escape hatch", Scorah's loss of faith culminated in her own personal apocalypse, the only kind of ending possible for a Jehovah's Witness.

Shunned by family and friends as an apostate, Scorah was alone in Shanghai and thrown into a world she had only known from the periphery - with no education or support system. A coming of age story of a woman already in her 30s, this unforgettable memoir examines what it's like to start one's life over again with an entirely new identity. It follows Scorah to New York City, where a personal tragedy forces her to look for new ways to find meaning in the absence of religion. With compelling, spare prose, Leaving the Witness traces the bittersweet process of starting over, when everything one's life was built around is gone.

©2019 Amber Scorah (P)2019 Penguin Audio

Critic reviews

“In her impressive debut, Scorah recounts her years as a Jehovah’s Witness in China, her decision to leave the faith, and her ongoing spiritual questioning...Scorah’s prose is straightforward, and she has a winning sense of humor about how much she’s changed...Scorah provides a rare glimpse into the insular world of the Jehovah’s Witnesses, and her accounts of expat life and leaving her faith should give this candid memoir wide appeal.” (Publishers Weekly)

"Scorah’s book, the bravery of which cannot be overstated, is an earnest one, fueled by a plucky humor and a can-do spirit that endears. Her tale, though an exploration of extremity, is highly readable and warm.... She teaches us how integrity is determined not by assenting to the juvenile claims of fundamentalism, but by enduring the universe as we find it - breathtaking in its ecstasies and vicious in its losses - without recourse to a God. Given the enormity of her grief and the wholesale collapse of her previous belief system, the intellectual integrity that Scorah displays is nothing short of a miracle.” (The New York Times Book Review)

“À la Tara Westover’s Educated, Scorah’s pensive, ultimately liberating memoir chronicles her formative years as a Jehovah’s Witness - a 'life in waiting' that included a sham marriage, covert missionary work in China, and eventual shunning by her religious community - and captures the bewilderment of belief and the bliss of self-discovery. Writing 'stitched the narrative arc of my life back together', Scorah says; her book is a suture for anyone searching to reconcile their past and present selves.” (O, The Oprah Magazine)

Astonishing book, delightfully read by the author

I'm hit or miss on authors reading their own books, but this one knocks it out of the park! She has a welcoming conversational reading style and I found myself talking back to the book, out loud, to the dismay of my dogs who couldn't hear the headphones.

Eye-opening experiences most people wonder about without ever wanting to participate! Shines a light on what might go on in the mind of a full-time bible volunteer on her own, mostly, in a foreign country.

Very interesting. Made me walk twice as far today! :-)

Fantastic story, quick read/listen...

Amber is such a good writer, and the story just pulls you in. I finished it in two sittings. I'm not an ex-JW, but loved learning more about the experience being a JW and leaving it. But the book is about much more than just leaving a religion. It's about transformations and opening one's eyes to things you've been unable or unwilling to see previously. This book is for everyone, not just ex-JWs.

resonating visceral story

As a fellow exjw this story was so familiar and still fascinating to listen to.

Eye opening and sad

The book helps you to understand some of the tenants of being a Witness. I found the book to be deeply personal. I recommend it.

Breathtaking Memoir

I could not stop listening to this truth is stranger than fiction memoir. Both the story and the reader are as good as it gets.

Very fresh,honest and personal account. Thought-provoking!

I enjoyed this book immensely and especially liked hearing the authors own voice telling deeply personal things about her journey from being born in a mind control cult, the Jehovahs Witnesses, to Communist China where she encounters a new reality that puts herself back in touch with herself.

Interesting insight into world of witnesses

Felt for her throughout. Helps explain the behavior of some witnesses I knew in past and currently. She really exposed herself.

3rd Generation Witness

I regret not knowing this book has been out all these years. As a third generation JW I can’t begin to describe how this book feels. It captures everything I’ve thought and gone through the last two decades of my life. My whole family are still JWs. Anyone who has been shunned by a cult or organization needs to read this book. Thank you. 🙏🏻

Head nodding

Hell of a good job on the book, Amber. Hell of a good job on using some basic reasoning. I mean change is inevitable, but this 15 billion year old universe ending tomorrow?, kind of unlikely. haha

Terrific book

This is one of the best stories I've read in a long time. Authentic and gripping. Gives a lot of Insight into the struggles someone can face and the struggle to overcome. I highly recommend.