It's Only a Movie
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Narrated by:
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Mark Kermode
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By:
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Mark Kermode
About this listen
To avoid fainting, keep repeating it's only a move ..only a movie ..only a movie ..only a movie
If you grew up believing that Planet of the Apes told you all you needed to know about politics, that Slade in Flame was a savage exposé of the pop world, and that The Exorcist revealed the meaning of life, then you probably spent far too many of your formative years at the cinema. Just as likely, you soon would have realised that there was only one career open to you - you'd have to become a film critic.
In It’s only a Movie, the incomparable Mark Kermode takes us into the weird world of a life lived in widescreen. Join him as he embarks on a gut-wrenching journey through the former Soviet Union on the trail of the low budget horror flick Dark Waters, cringe as he's handbagged by Helen Mirren at the Bafta awards ceremony, cheer as he gets thrown out of the Cannes film festival for heckling in very bad French, and don't forget to gasp as he's shot at while interviewing Werner Herzog in the Hollywood hills.
Written with sardonic wit and wry good humour, this compelling cinematic memoir is genuinely ‘inspired by real events’.
©2010 Mark Kermode (P)2010 Random House AudioListeners also enjoyed...
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I Blame Dennis Hopper
- And Other Stories from a Life Lived in and out of the Movies
- By: Illeana Douglas
- Narrated by: Illeana Douglas
- Length: 9 hrs and 51 mins
- Unabridged
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In 1969, Illeana Douglas' parents saw the film Easy Rider and were transformed. Taking Dennis Hopper's words - "That's what it's all about, man" - to heart, they abandoned their comfortable upper-middle-class life and gave Illeana a childhood filled with hippies, goats, free spirits, and free love. Illeana writes, "Since it was all out of my control, I began to think of my life as a movie, with a Dennis Hopper-like father at the center of it." I Blame Dennis Hopper is a rollicking, funny, at times tender exploration of the way movies can change our lives.
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Loved Every Moment of this Book!
- By Susan Van Allen on 01-20-16
By: Illeana Douglas
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As You Wish
- Inconceivable Tales from the Making of The Princess Bride
- By: Cary Elwes, Joe Layden, Rob Reiner - foreword
- Narrated by: Cary Elwes, Christopher Guest, Carol Kane, and others
- Length: 7 hrs and 1 min
- Unabridged
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From actor Cary Elwes, who played the iconic role of Westley in The Princess Bride, comes a first-person account and behind-the-scenes look at the making of the cult classic film filled with never-before-told stories, exclusive photographs, and interviews with costars Robin Wright, Wallace Shawn, Billy Crystal, Christopher Guest, and Mandy Patinkin, as well as author and screenwriter William Goldman, producer Norman Lear, and director Rob Reiner.
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I don't normally write reviews but...
- By Anonymous on 10-18-14
By: Cary Elwes, and others
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I'm Hosting as Fast as I Can!
- By: Tom Bergeron
- Narrated by: Tom Bergeron
- Length: 6 hrs and 24 mins
- Unabridged
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In I'm Hosting as Fast as I Can!, Tom elaborates on the process by which he is able to sit calmly and patiently, without being distracted, at any time, no matter how hectic, as well as respond quickly (and hilariously) when Marie Osmond faints at his feet on live TV. Haven't seen it? Check it out on YouTube. The man is always in control.
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A wonderful "read"
- By Chrys on 04-29-09
By: Tom Bergeron
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Harry, a History
- The True Story of a Boy Wizard, His Fans, and Life Inside the Harry Potter Phenomenon
- By: Melissa Anelli
- Narrated by: Renée Raudman
- Length: 10 hrs and 58 mins
- Unabridged
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With remembrances from J. K. Rowling's editors, agents, publicists, fans, and Rowling herself, Melissa Anelli takes us on a personal journey through every aspect of the Harry Potter phenomenon - from his very first spell to his lasting impact on the way we live and dream.
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Relive the magic!
- By Heather on 03-19-09
By: Melissa Anelli
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Reveal: Robbie Williams
- By: Chris Heath
- Narrated by: Joe Jameson
- Length: 17 hrs and 4 mins
- Unabridged
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An intimate, funny and frank account of the moments behind the music, of the truth behind the headlines and of the fascinatingly complicated man behind the imperious entertainer, Reveal is Robbie Williams as you've never seen him before. Best-selling author Chris Heath has been working closely with Robbie for many years to create a personal and raw account of fame, fortune, family and music - a vivid and detailed story of the real highs and lows as Robbie has found his way forward, that is unprecedented in its intimacy and honesty.
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Absolutely Briliant!
- By L. Elder on 10-01-17
By: Chris Heath
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Seinfeldia
- How a Show About Nothing Changed Everything
- By: Jennifer Keishin Armstrong
- Narrated by: Christina Delaine
- Length: 9 hrs and 59 mins
- Unabridged
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Comedians Larry David and Jerry Seinfeld never thought anyone would watch their silly little sitcom about a New York comedian sitting around talking to his friends. NBC executives didn't think anyone would watch either, but they bought it anyway, hiding it away in the TV dead zone of summer. But against all odds, viewers began to watch, first a few and then many, until nine years later nearly 40 million Americans were tuning in weekly.
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This bad narration is making me thirsty...
- By Audio Gra Gra on 10-06-16
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David Mitchell: Back Story
- By: David Mitchell
- Narrated by: David Mitchell
- Length: 9 hrs and 25 mins
- Unabridged
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David Mitchell, who you may know for his inappropriate anger on every TV panel show except Never Mind the Buzzcocks, his look of permanent discomfort on C4 sex comedy Peep Show, his online commenter-baiting in The Observer or just for wearing a stick-on moustache in That Mitchell and Webb Look, has written a book about his life.
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One of the Funniest, Clever Brits around
- By Delia on 08-30-13
By: David Mitchell
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Best. Movie. Year. Ever.
- How 1999 Blew Up the Big Screen
- By: Brian Raftery
- Narrated by: George Newbern
- Length: 10 hrs and 55 mins
- Unabridged
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From a veteran culture writer and modern movie expert, a celebration and analysis of the movies of 1999 - arguably the most groundbreaking year in American cinematic history.
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Like talking about movies with a friend
- By Shawn Inmon on 05-30-19
By: Brian Raftery
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When Giants Walked the Earth
- A Biography of Led Zeppelin
- By: Mick Wall
- Narrated by: Simon Vance
- Length: 18 hrs and 11 mins
- Unabridged
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They were the last great band of the '60s and the first great band of the '70s. They rose, somewhat unpromisingly, from the ashes of the Yardbirds to become one of the biggest-selling rock bands of all time - and eventually paid the price for it, with disaster, drug addiction, and death.
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Very annoying but tolerable for serious fans.
- By M. Allen on 08-14-19
By: Mick Wall
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Caddyshack
- The Making of a Hollywood Cinderella Story
- By: Chris Nashawaty
- Narrated by: Peter Berkrot
- Length: 7 hrs and 48 mins
- Unabridged
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Caddyshack is one of the most beloved comedies of all time, a classic snobs vs. slobs story of working-class kids and the white-collar buffoons that make them haul their golf bags in the hot summer sun. It has sex, drugs, and one very memorable candy bar, but the movie we all know and love didn't start out that way, and everyone who made it certainly didn't have the word classic in mind as the cameras were rolling.
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Not Really About Caddyshack Until Hour 5
- By William M. on 07-01-18
By: Chris Nashawaty
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Stories I Only Tell My Friends
- An Autobiography
- By: Rob Lowe
- Narrated by: Rob Lowe
- Length: 9 hrs and 10 mins
- Unabridged
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A teen idol at 15, an international icon and founder of the Brat Pack at 20, and one of Hollywood's top stars to this day, Rob Lowe chronicles his experiences. Never mean-spirited or salacious, Lowe delivers unexpected glimpses into his successes, disappointments, relationships, and one-of-a-kind encounters with people who shaped our world over the last 25 years. These stories are as entertaining as they are unforgettable.
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Great Book and Great Story
- By Natalie J. Belle MD on 04-30-11
By: Rob Lowe
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You Might Remember Me
- The Life and Times of Phil Hartman
- By: Mike Thomas
- Narrated by: Corey Snow
- Length: 9 hrs and 35 mins
- Unabridged
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Both joyous tribute and serious biography, Mike Thomas' You Might Remember Me is a celebration of Phil Hartman's multi-faceted career and an exhaustively reported, warts-and-all examination of his often intriguing and sometimes complicated life - a powerful, humor-filled and disquieting portrait of a man who was loved by many, admired by millions and taken from them far too early.
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I Will Remember You Phil Hartman
- By Roxanna on 12-19-14
By: Mike Thomas
What listeners say about It's Only a Movie
Average customer ratingsReviews - Please select the tabs below to change the source of reviews.
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Overall
- Bob Homan
- 11-20-10
Very funny stories about the love of movies
I noticed this because of the cover, but the audio sample hooked me. I loved this book. Mark Kermode, who also does a BBC show that you can find in podcast about movies, writes and narrates this. I had no idea who he was before this, but after listening, I'm a big admirer.
He talks a lot about a variety of movies: The Exorcist, Mama Mia, Blue Velvet, The Queen, Breaking the Waves, Silent Running, Hellraiser, Local Hero, Texas Chainsaw Massacre II, The Evil Dead, and others with funny observations and personal notes.
The funniest parts are his first time on the radio, his ill-fated trip to newly capitalized Russia and his trip to the US to interview his favorite celebrities.
If you appreciate movies, especially cult or horror movies, you'll like this book.
Because of this book, I now subscribe to the Kermode and Mayo podcast, which updates every Friday with interviews and usually funny movie reviews.
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- Vales Tales
- 06-19-15
Pure Witter-tainment - only deeper, & richer
If one can get past the laughs (not easy, because there are so many), this not only an amusing autobiographical piece of storytelling, but a deep love story: a love story about a man an his muse - movies.
Kermode reads his own writing the same way he speaks on the BBC: with wit, self-deprecating humor, but also with his passion for all things cinema.
I will have to listen to it more than once, because, frankly, I was often laughing too hard to get all the details of this audio "movie" "inspired by true events", directed, produced, written, scored and read by the Professor.
Highest recommendation - and check out his podcasts, both with & w/o Simon Mayo. Yes, you'll be addicted, but it's worth the monkey(s) on your back & every minute of your time, and every megabyte of storage & bandwidth.
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- Brooke L. Morris
- 06-22-16
I just love Mark.
What did you like best about this story?
The best part of the book is definitely the story of Werner Herzog getting shot, which a brief google search will give you footage of.
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- Dan
- 02-21-20
Probably not what you're expecting
I got this while on a film book spree and needed some audiobooks to get thru a busy work period. I've always found kermode slightly arrogant and annoying, but generally enjoy his reviews. Sadly, he's much more palatable in small portions. Without a producer telling him to wrap things up, he drones on endlessly about the most mundane stories that have nothing to do with film.
The early chapters about his love of cinema and discovery of horror are enjoyable, but quickly give way to entire chapters devoted to being a confused brit in new york, a confused brit in LA, and a confused uncomfortable brit in russia.
If these are the highlights of 20+ years of reviewing film, then he's led a remarkably dull life given his proximity to such an interesting profession.
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