Immigrant Secrets

The Search for My Grandparents

By: John Mancini

Narrated by: Andrew Parrella

The only thing my father ever said about his Italian immigrant family was that his parents died in the 1930s, shortly after arriving at Ellis Island. Except they didn't. Once I began the search for my grandparents, I mostly ran into dead-ends. Until the 1940 census. My grandparents magically appear, but as inmates at the Rockland Insane Asylum. What happened? Why all the secrecy? And how did I use genealogy to unravel the mystery?

Like many of their greatest generation compadres, my parents, Joseph and Sallyann, quickly headed from New York City to the suburbs in the 1950s shortly after they were married. They arrived in New Jersey, and began their own personal population explosion, having six kids—John, June, Joseph, Jennifer, Jeffrey, and Jeanne—within an 11-year span. Yes, all Js. It was a typical story of life in the suburbs. Imagine the television show The Wonder Years set in New Jersey, and you can get the picture.

On The Wonder Years, you always had a feeling there was some untold story concerning Kevin’s father Jack and his father. Bit by bit, over the years, the backstory is revealed. Kevin’s father was born in 1927. He grew up during the Great Depression, served in the US Marine Corps during the Korean War, and worked as a product distribution manager at NORCOM, a somewhat mysterious large military defense company. Later, he started his own business building and selling handcrafted furniture. In the last episode, it was revealed that he died of a heart attack in 1975.

There are certain parallels. My father was born in 1925. He grew up during the Great Depression, served in the US Navy during WWII and worked as a business analyst at Union Carbide, a somewhat mysterious large chemical company. Later, he started his own business with a friend, but I have no idea what they did. In my father’s last episode, he had a heart attack in New York City in 1987, shortly after officially retiring.

There is one significant difference between Jack Arnold in The Wonder Years and my father.

My father had no “backstory”. My father never mentioned his family. Never. We only knew—or thought we knew—that his parents died in the 1930s. Unless you knew my father—the consummate family man—you will have no idea how weird this was.

And therein are the seeds of my quest to unravel our family history mystery.

In a pair of ship manifests, I discovered my father's parents, a pair of Italian immigrants arriving at Ellis Island in the early 1920s, intent on grabbing their share of the American dream. In the 1930 census, I found a family of four—my grandparents, my father, and his brother—with a tenuous foothold on that dream, operating a small fruit stand in Manhattan.

After that, I had mostly frustrating dead-ends—until the release of the 1940 census. My grandparents magically reappeared in the census—but as “inmates” at the Rockland Insane Asylum, never to reemerge. And through my entire lifetime until my father's death, there was no mention that he had an extended family of aunts and uncles and cousins, all living within driving distance.

What happened? Who were these people? How did their lives go so awry?

This is a story about my efforts to use genealogy to discover the truth about our family and a reflection on the impact of secrets on our lives. It is also the story of what it means to be an immigrant—and the impact that “otherness” and mental illness can have on the vulnerable. And lastly, it is my attempt to think through the "why" and "how" of my father, 34 years after his death.

©2022 John Mancini (P)2022 John Mancini

Amazing family history brought to life

This is a fascinating multi-layered story about one’s longing for his roots, unknown family history, family secrets and kafkaesque bureaucratic nightmares.

A fascinating story about a system that does not protect an individual. And how the same system protects information about him - Information that is of value only to living relatives.

Loved the kindle version and audiobooks is well produced as well. Narration is pleasurable to listen.

Thoughtful entertainment & great read

Few books are true "can't put down" examples but the author deftly weaves his real-life search for answers to his family history with a poignant reimagining of the gaps. Clever writing turns this into a great storyline. For anyone who has ever wondered about what their family went through when they immigrated or even what life was like at the turn of the last century, this is a thought-provoking read. Makes you wonder what was life during that period but also makes you wonder what you will never know about your own family. If you told me that a book talking about genealogy would be entailing and having me rush to the next chapter I would have never believed you, but the author does a great job of making this historical account turn into a story of itself. The narrator keeps the story working with careful accents and just the right amount of emotion. Quality book.

Fascinating history and great storytelling!

History is interesting by itself, but so much more so when it’s delivered in good story form—as it should be. No one’s life is a textbook, and history shouldn’t be either. It needs context. This story puts you in the shoes of Italian immigrants to America, with all the relevant hopes, fears, and struggles. As a history of one person’s ancestry it also delivers on the, “Who am I?”, question. I also enjoyed the delivery by Andrew Parrell. He gave life to the Italian pronunciations without overdoing it.