Before I Forget

Love, Hope, Help, and Acceptance in Our Fight Against Alzheimer's

By: B. Smith, Dan Gasby, Michael Shnayerson

Narrated by: B. Smith, Dan Gasby

"I know where I'm going. I'm still myself. I just can't remember things as well as I once did. So on short trips, I work hard not to be confused. I'll say to myself, What are we going to do? How long are we staying? It's like I'm talking to my other self - the self I used to be. She tells me, This is what we need to buy - not that. I'm conscious of that other self guiding me now."

Restaurateur, magazine publisher, celebrity chef, and nationally known lifestyle maven B. Smith is struggling at 66 with a tag she never expected to add to that string: Alzheimer's patient. She's not alone. Every 67 seconds someone newly develops it, and millions of lives are affected by its aftershocks.

B. and her husband, Dan, working with Vanity Fair contributing editor Michael Shnayerson, unstintingly share their unfolding story. Crafted in short chapters that interweave their narrative with practical and helpful advice, listeners learn about dealing with Alzheimer's day-to-day challenges: the family realities and tensions, ways of coping, coming research that may tip the scale, as well as lessons learned along the way.

At its heart, Before I Forget is a love story illuminating a love of family, life, and hope.

©2016 B. Smith and Dan Gasby (P)2016 Random House Audio

Critic reviews

"...An enduring love story." (Publisher's Weekly)

"A brave and important story, told with candor, love and useful information. Before I Forget offers a real glimpse into what Alzheimer’s actually looks like in a loved one, and sheds a hopeful light on why this disease needs much more research, funding, and attention." (Kimberly Williams-Paisley, actor and author of Where the Light Gets In)

"What an amazing couple and what an amazing book! It is medically and scientifically accurate, and yet places this devastating disease in the context of a beautiful and intimate relationship. We must do better as a community, in our families and within our government in responding to this disease. African-Americans are especially called upon to get more involved in the research as this disease disproportionately impacts us." (Dr. David Satcher, former surgeon general of the United States)

Excellent!

This was the most comprehensive personal account on Alzheimer's I've read. My parent recently died from dementia and a good portion of this book contained information I learned along the way--the hard way. This is an important book for everyone. Brain disease hits hard in most families at an alarming rate with our population living longer than ever before. What you need to know is in this book--you won't need to painstakingly search for it like I did. I would just add that having tried all the currently available drugs, none made any difference whatsoever, despite the claims of advertisements you see everywhere. Please support ongoing studies and research.

Poignant Memoir, Stirring Call to Action

This is part love story, part call to action, part information for the un- or newly initiated. And it's all good. Parts of it get very technical, but it's all interesting, and of course it's evened out and Alzheimer's is given its face by showing what it's doing to B and Dan. They are unstintingly open with their lives, and it's heartbreaking.
It is also, however, galling at times. Dan, and he is honest about it, picks a lot of battles that are ridiculous. How about not having how you feel about the entirety of your day hinge upon whether your wife can find her purse easily or not? Or maybe have a lot of purses everywhere? I don't know, I know it's hard; we have it now in our family too, and you have to be creative and oh so resilient. And you have to, as Dan says, over and over, "remind yourself that you can't reason with someone who has lost the ability to reason."
Now where Dan HAS picked a battle and is truly, truly awesome, is in the fight to raise awareness of and money for research for Alzheimer's. That man has some spectacular ideas, and really, he has conviction to no end.
In this memoir, only the narration falters a bit, as Dan reads his own words, bit by bit, haltingly at times, but when he's casual, he's golden. And when B. speaks, you just love her. You just want the best for her, and you just hate the disease.
This is a spectacular book, a bit technical, but filled with warmth, tears, and laughter too.

Very, very, very informative .

I loved the story. As an African American, I chose to share this book to share with my book club. We all can think of someone we know and or love with the disease. Alzheimer's affects us more than we realize. I hope to help bring more awareness to Alzheimer's Disease and the many causal factors. I'm also hoping generate more interest and participation in clinical trials. Thank you for sharing your story. MB.

Unforgettable

Thoroughly enjoyed this personal, heartfelt, informative memoir of our much loved role model and family's continuing journey.

Comforting & educational

This book is just what I needed as my husband & I embark upon this journey. There is a wealth of information as to what to expect as your loved one’s life changes. I appreciated the medical info as well as tips of how to cope as a caregiver. It also got us to participate in a new trial as an African-American. I’m definitely going to help educate others. Thank you!!

Learned so much!

Touching story about how dementia progresses. Lots of advice on how to cope as the caregiver. In a sense a love story.

Very Good Book

An insight into the glimpse of a couple struggling with Alzheimers disease such a hard disease to deal with hoping they will find a cure soon no one should have to live like an Alzheimers patients t and their caregivers.

Brave story

eye opener, family story, treatment facts, hopeful, tender moments between real people and not perfect ones. thank you for letting us into your home.

The Caregivers Point of View

I read this because it was a book club read. I am glad I did. It is a very open and honest view of the challenge of dealing with early onset Alzheimers. Dan Gatsby provides a very open and heartbreaking story of the journey of identifying B. Smith's alzheimers diagnosis and the challenge of being the caregiver for someone you love. The narration by B. Smith gives you the perspective from the person who has the disease. Must read for anyone affected by this disease.

We can't fix what we don't face.

I listened because... with all of the controversy I wanted to get a clearer understanding. I was definitely enlightened! Important lesson...be very, very slow to judge the journey of others. The book was thought provoking ...and enlightening on a number of levels. Narration left a little to be desired... but overall I highly recommend it!