An Unlikely Funeral
Be Careful What You Wish For
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An Unlikely Funeral
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Narrated by:
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Ink Arnadine
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By:
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K. L. Smith
About this listen
The hilarious new comedy from the author of Flight of the Cuckoo and The P**e in the Jam Tart.
The newsreader took a breath and began: “And here we have the remarkable tale of local man George Pimpton, who sadly died last week at the grand old age of 96. It’s only since his passing that locals have realized they had a reclusive celebrity in their midst. His story has captured the attention of the nation, and people are fascinated that such a man had been quietly living down an unassuming terraced street, keeping himself to himself. All week people have been coming out in droves to lay flowers outside of his house, and to give donations to his favorite charity—Guide Dogs for the Blind.”
The only problem was, this was all an accidental lie. George Pimpton was no celebrity. He’d never done anything remotely interesting with his life and had spent the last 30 years of his unremarkable existence laid in bed watching daytime TV and picking at his bellybutton fluff. Upon his death, his well-intentioned—though often misguided—neighbors simply wanted to jazz up his obituary to make his life sound a little more interesting, a well-meant gesture that quickly got drastically out of hand due to the perils of social media.
After Paul McCartney mistakes George for someone else and sends a farewell tweet to his “old friend”, this celebrity endorsement sets off a chain reaction that can't be reigned back in. It also didn’t take long for other celebrities to start coming out of the woodwork with half-remembered stories about George. After all, anyone who was anyone had a story to tell about old George…and now the world was watching, and waiting to hear just what would be in that eulogy….
©2020 Kerry Louise Smith (P)2022 Kerry Louise SmithListeners also enjoyed...
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Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 38
-
Story4 out of 5 stars 38
Dear Elizabeth, I've been watching you. I hope to see you...soon. Liz Cafferky is on the up. Rescued from her dark past by the owner of a drop-in centre for older men, Liz soon finds herself as the charity's face - and the unwilling darling of the Dublin media. Amidst her claustrophobic fame, Liz barely notices a letter from a new fan. But then one of the centre's clients is brutally murdered, and Elizabeth receives another, more sinister note. Running from her own ghosts, Liz is too scared to go to the police.
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5 out of 5 stars
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Fantastic!!
- By Brett McAteer on 03-06-19
By: Sinead Crowley
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The Bright Side Running Club
- By: Josie Lloyd
- Narrated by: Danielle Cohen
- Length: 11 hrs and 52 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall4.5 out of 5 stars 34
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Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 30
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Story4.5 out of 5 stars 31
When Keira first receives her breast cancer diagnosis, she never expects to end up joining a running group with three women she’s only just met. Totally blindsided, all she can think about is how she doesn’t want to tell her family or step back from work. Nor does she want to be part of a group of fellow cancer patients. Cancer is not her club. And yet it’s running - hot, sweaty, Lycra-clad running in the company of brilliant, funny women all going through treatment - that unexpectedly gives Keira the hope she so urgently needs.
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2 out of 5 stars
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depressing
- By Jessica on 09-15-22
By: Josie Lloyd
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I Predict a Riot
- Murder, Extortion & Carrot Cake
- By: Colin Bateman
- Narrated by: Adam Moore
- Length: 21 hrs and 33 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall4 out of 5 stars 72
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Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 28
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Story4 out of 5 stars 28
Walter has a rubbish job, so has Margaret. But when they meet through a dating agency, neither is who they seem. Margaret's married for a start, and Walter's encounter with her husband, Billy, leaves him black and blue. Billy's a dodgy accountant for politician and racketeer Pink Harrison, who is about to come unstuck.
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5 out of 5 stars
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PICK ME PLEASE PICK ME WE'LL HAVE LOTS OF FUN
- By Louise on 10-19-08
By: Colin Bateman
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You Had Me at Hello
- By: Mhairi McFarlane
- Narrated by: Julie Hesmondhalgh
- Length: 10 hrs and 25 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall4 out of 5 stars 329
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Performance3.5 out of 5 stars 298
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Story4 out of 5 stars 295
What happens when the one that got away comes back? Find out in this sparkling debut from Mhairi McFarlane. Rachel and Ben. Ben and Rachel. It was them against the world. Until it all fell apart. It’s been a decade since they last spoke, but when Rachel bumps into Ben one rainy day, the years melt away. They’d been partners in crime and the best of friends. But life has moved on: Ben is married. Rachel is not. Yet in that split second, Rachel feels the old friendship return. And along with it, the broken heart she’s never been able to mend.
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5 out of 5 stars
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Narrator ruins it
- By Sandi P on 09-07-16
By: Mhairi McFarlane
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The Brightest Star in the Sky
- A Novel
- By: Marian Keyes
- Narrated by: Caitriona Keyes
- Length: 17 hrs and 49 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall4 out of 5 stars 135
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Performance4 out of 5 stars 76
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Story4 out of 5 stars 79
The Brightest Star in the Sky follows seven neighbors whose lives become entangled when a sassy and prescient spirit pays a visit to their Dublin townhouse with the intent of changing at least one of their lives. But what will this metamorphosis be and who will the sprite choose?
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1 out of 5 stars
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Terrible sound quality, worse narration
- By Jan on 02-23-10
By: Marian Keyes
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Watermelon
- By: Marian Keyes
- Narrated by: Gerri Halligan
- Length: 13 hrs and 46 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall4.5 out of 5 stars 108
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Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 100
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Story4 out of 5 stars 100
At 29, Claire is full of the joys of life - that is, until her husband leaves her on the day she gives birth to her baby. With a broken heart, a beautiful newly born and an expanding mirror image, she decides to visit her eccentric family in Dublin. There she starts to feel better. So much better, in fact, that James is in for a surprise when he decides to slither back into her life....
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5 out of 5 stars
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A fun read, every time
- By Audrey Smith on 01-06-23
By: Marian Keyes
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What My Best Friend Did
- By: Lucy Dawson
- Narrated by: Georgia Maguire
- Length: 8 hrs and 31 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall4 out of 5 stars 129
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Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 119
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Story4 out of 5 stars 117
Alice's life has become a bit boring lately. Her friends are busy getting married and having babies, but she's not ready for those changes in her own life - not even sure she still loves her boyfriend. Then she meets Gretchen. A brand-new, fun and unencumbered friend. Gretchen knows how to have a good time, and she also has a totally gorgeous brother. Before she knows it, Alice has been swept up into her new best friend's world. But Gretchen has a dark secret. Will Alice learn the truth before she throws her old life away?
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3 out of 5 stars
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hmm
- By Claire Lieber on 03-11-19
By: Lucy Dawson
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I Heart New York: A Novel
- By: Lindsey Kelk
- Narrated by: Justine Eyre
- Length: 9 hrs and 48 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall4 out of 5 stars 126
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Performance4 out of 5 stars 116
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Story4 out of 5 stars 114
Angela Clark is in love - with the most fabulous city in the world! When Angela catches her boyfriend with another woman at her best friend's wedding, she's heartbroken and desperate to run away. With little more than a crumpled bridesmaid dress, a pair of Louboutins, and her passport in hand, Angela decides to jump on a plane for... NYC! Settling into a cute hotel and quickly bonding with benevolent concierge Jenny - a chatterbox Oprah wannabe with room for a new best friend, Angela heads out for a New York makeover....
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5 out of 5 stars
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Surprisingly wonderful!!!
- By Vicky Red on 04-04-17
By: Lindsey Kelk
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Killing Cupid
- By: Mark Edwards, Louise Voss
- Narrated by: Bea Holland, Oliver J. Hembrough
- Length: 9 hrs and 50 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall4 out of 5 stars 74
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Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 70
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Story4 out of 5 stars 71
Alex Parkinson is in love with his writing tutor, Siobhan. He has never loved anyone like this, but how can he convince Siobhan that they are meant to be together? So Alex stalks her on Facebook and finds out where she lives, buys her presents using her own credit card and sends her messages telling her exactly what he wants to do to her. He breaks into her house, reads her diary and secretly listens to her while she takes a bath. Isn't that what all lovers do?
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5 out of 5 stars
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Love conquers all
- By Jenny on 02-04-23
By: Mark Edwards, and others
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Those Who Lie
- By: Diane Jeffrey
- Narrated by: Karen Cass
- Length: 9 hrs and 8 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall4 out of 5 stars 105
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Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 95
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Story4 out of 5 stars 95
Emily Klein doesn’t know she has killed her husband until the day of his funeral. At first, signs point to a tragic accident. Yet, as Emily pieces together the events before his death - events which led to her own memory loss - she begins to suspect that her husband’s death may have been the result of more than a terrible twist of fate.... But the accident is only the beginning. Because while Emily’s physical scars will heal, the trauma of the accident has awakened old ghosts. She hears strange sounds, catches things that can’t possibly be there in the corner of her eye.
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5 out of 5 stars
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A page turner indeed
- By Mystical Lady on 12-07-18
By: Diane Jeffrey
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The Eyre Affair
- A Thursday Next Novel
- By: Jasper Fforde
- Narrated by: Susan Duerden
- Length: 12 hrs and 13 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall4 out of 5 stars 2,723
-
Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 2,197
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Story4 out of 5 stars 2,198
In Jasper Fforde's Great Britain, circa 1985, time travel is routine, cloning is a reality (dodos are the resurrected pet of choice), and literature is taken very, very seriously. England is a virtual police state where an aunt can get lost (literally) in a Wordsworth poem and forging Byronic verse is a punishable offense. All this is business as usual for Thursday Next, renowned Special Operative in literary detection.
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5 out of 5 stars
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A Worthy Read
- By chicagoalum on 01-21-10
By: Jasper Fforde
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The Wicked Girls
- By: Alex Marwood
- Narrated by: Anna Bentinck
- Length: 14 hrs and 12 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall4 out of 5 stars 3,826
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Performance4 out of 5 stars 3,464
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Story4 out of 5 stars 3,460
On a fateful summer morning in 1986, two 11-year-old girls meet for the first time. By the end of the day, they will both be charged with murder. Twenty-five years later, journalist Kirsty Lindsay is reporting on a series of sickening attacks on young female tourists in a seaside vacation town when her investigation leads her to interview carnival cleaner Amber Gordon. For Kirsty and Amber, it's the first time they've seen each other since that dark day so many years ago.
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5 out of 5 stars
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I didn't want to like these girls...
- By Lesley on 08-30-13
By: Alex Marwood
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Knots and Crosses
- Inspector Rebus, Book 1
- By: Ian Rankin
- Narrated by: Michael Page
- Length: 5 hrs and 58 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall4 out of 5 stars 812
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Performance4 out of 5 stars 704
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Story4 out of 5 stars 706
Detective John Rebus' city is being terrorized by a baffling series of murders…and he's tied to a maniac by an invisible knot of blood. As the ghoulish killings mount and the tabloid headlines scream, Rebus cannot stop the feverish shrieks from within his own mind. Because he isn't just one cop trying to catch a killer - he's the man who's got all the pieces to the puzzle…
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4 out of 5 stars
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I've Read Mixed Reviews and Can Marry Them
- By Steve Mac on 02-13-16
By: Ian Rankin
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The Cherry Tree Cafe
- By: Heidi Swain
- Narrated by: Karen Cass
- Length: 9 hrs and 12 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall4.5 out of 5 stars 109
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Performance5 out of 5 stars 101
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Story4.5 out of 5 stars 101
Lizzie Dixon's life feels as though it's fallen apart. Instead of the marriage proposal she was hoping for from her boyfriend, she is unceremoniously dumped, and her job is about to go the same way. So there's only one option: to go back home to the village she grew up in and to try to start again. Her best friend, Jemma, is delighted Lizzie has come back home, as she has just bought a little cafe, and Lizzie's sewing skills are just what she needs to help get it ready for the grand opening.
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2 out of 5 stars
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The weakest heroine ever
- By m Gary on 05-11-20
By: Heidi Swain
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About a Girl
- By: Lindsey Kelk
- Narrated by: Penelope Rawlins
- Length: 13 hrs and 26 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall4.5 out of 5 stars 92
-
Performance4 out of 5 stars 82
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Story4.5 out of 5 stars 83
The brand new summer bestseller from the immensely popular Lindsey KelkTess Brookes has always been a girl with a Plan. But when the Plan goes belly up, she’s forced to reconsider.After accidently answering her flatmate Vanessa’s phone, she decides that since being Tess isn’t going so well, she might try being Vanessa. With nothing left to lose, she accepts Vanessa’s photography assignment to Hawaii - she used to be an amateur snapper, how hard can it be? Right? But Tess is soon in big trouble.
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3 out of 5 stars
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Ahhh okay...
- By lzydaizy on 08-02-16
By: Lindsey Kelk
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Falling Off Air
- By: Catherine Sampson
- Narrated by: Kate Reading
- Length: 9 hrs and 6 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall4 out of 5 stars 185
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Performance4.5 out of 5 stars 44
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Story4 out of 5 stars 43
Robin Ballantyne's life is finally coming together. After learning she was pregnant with twins and being abandoned by her irresponsible boyfriend, Adam, she's settling into life as a single mother. But one night, after putting the children to bed, she hears an argument and suddenly, a body falls past her window. Running outside, she finds the body of Paula Carmichael, a renowned activist.
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5 out of 5 stars
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Rich, developed and unusual
- By Hannah Coale on 02-02-05
What listeners say about An Unlikely Funeral
Average customer ratingsReviews - Please select the tabs below to change the source of reviews.
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Overall5 out of 5 stars
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Performance5 out of 5 stars
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Story5 out of 5 stars
- Adam
- 03-05-23
Hilarious!!
I feel as though this is the secret dream of everyone with a hoarder relative or neighbor!! Ink Arnadine is the perfect narrator for this author!!
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Overall5 out of 5 stars
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Performance5 out of 5 stars
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Story5 out of 5 stars
- Fred
- 10-10-24
"He knows that they're the fools . . ."
This is spectacularly brilliantly hilarious 👏 😂
Ms. Smith has surpassed herself in the comedic experience. Oh what Sue and Phil get themselves into! Be sure to listen where laughter is acceptable, you won't be able to contain yourself. 🎊
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