Space Humor

When petty criminal Cal Carver is locked in a cell with a deranged, semi-naked cannibal, he suspects his life has hit its lowest point. He is mistaken. Abducted by aliens and whisked across the galaxy, Cal is thrown into a team of misfits and criminals and sent on a top secret mission for the president of Space. And that's when everything starts to go very, very wrong....

The newly renamed Vance Turbo has sabotaged his own career at Space Fleet Academy due to a desire to atone for a training accident. Unfortunately, his actions result in him getting press-ganged into an expendable crew of misfits recruited by a legendary starship captain. Their mission? To recover a collection of lost sun-destroying missiles that could restart a galactic war. Unfortunately, Vance is smart enough to know something is wrong with this picture. After all, no sane person would recruit this crew to save the universe.

A century ago, the Sentience Wars tore the galaxy apart and nearly ended the entire concept of intelligent space-faring life. In the aftermath, a curious tradition was invented - something to cheer up everyone who was left and bring the shattered worlds together in the spirit of peace, unity, and understanding. Once every cycle, the civilizations gather for the Metagalactic Grand Prix - part gladiatorial contest, part beauty pageant, part concert extravaganza, and part continuation of the wars of the past.

Arrogant warlords just killed one of his crew and destroyed his ship. He unleashes a torrent of human fed anger the likes of which they have never seen before. And, what is this Prophecy thing about humans, anyway. . . and why does he have to be involved? An addictive, heart-stopping, military science fiction and space opera thriller you just can’t put down, so, warn your family and friends you’ll be in another universe for a while… Grab your copy right now, put on your battle armor and web into your ship-couch as you join Captain Derek Hamilton and his warrior crew on the wild ride ...

Like his fellow lunarnauts - otherwise known as Moonies - living on Moon Base Alpha, twelve-year-old Dashiell Gibson is famous the world over for being one of the first humans to live on the moon. And he's bored out of his mind. Kids aren't allowed on the lunar surface, meaning they're trapped inside the tiny moon base with next to nothing to occupy their time - and the only other kid Dash's age spends all his time hooked into virtual reality games.

He just wants to run space cargo. Alien warlords want him dead - with a billion credit price on his head. Now, everyone with a gun and a spaceship wants to cash in. But, humans are not easy to kill, especially a battle hardened Marine warrior from Earth. He is angry, frustrated and uncertain about where his life is going, but knows one thing - he absolutely hates the arrogance of the wealthy elite who paid the billion credit bounty. And, he’ll make them pay with their precious, jewelry studded lives if it is the last thing he does. They thought it should be easy. After all, he is just a ...

Five years ago, the US Space Force became a reality. And while those writing the checks took things very seriously, the other military branches did not. As a result, Space Force was populated by undesirables. My name is Captain Ethan Stone, a decorated member of SEAL Team Six turned Space Force "recruit". Flash forward five years and between tenses. President West is in office. Power has shifted. And Space Force is defunded. With just a handful of us still living on base, we find ourselves being evicted. But before all of us can leave, aliens invade.

High Protector Vance Turbo managed to save the entire galaxy and retrieve his wayward child, Astrid. As such, he's been looking for a safe job to raise his daughter and find some peace. Unfortunately, that turns out to have been a terrible idea because while Vance believes the universe doesn't need him, the universe disagrees. Sent on a crazy mission to assassinate a Sorkanan warlord and recover a long-lost space pirate treasure, Vance discovers that humanity is on the chopping block for its many sins.

Enid is obsessed with space. She can tell you all about black holes and their ability to spaghettify you without batting an eye in fear. Her one major phobia? Bald men. But she tries to keep that one under wraps. When she’s not listening to her favorite true crime podcasts on a loop, she’s serially dating a rotation of women from dating apps. At the same time, she’s trying to forge a new relationship with her estranged half-sisters after the death of her absent father.

Nancy Kranich (played by Emmy-nominated actress Natasha Lyonne of Russian Doll and Orange Is the New Black) is a night nurse on an orbiting space station. But Nancy hates her job, is sick of space, and longs to find adventure and a safe place to smoke cigarettes that won’t blow everyone up. But when Nancy gets caught up in an outer-space conspiracy involving President Kennedy, former vice-president Richard Nixon, and an intergalactic object that could change the course of history, she gets way more adventure than she bargained for.

Vance Turbo, Hero of Space, has spent most of his hard-won officer's career helping refugees. This ends when a star gets blown up and he accidentally ends up saving everyone. Now the captain of the E.S.S Ares, he is on a goodwill mission to Contested Space. Unfortunately, his crew is made up of people who couldn't qualify for Space Academy but are now in thanks to lowered enlistment standards.

TwiceFar station is at the edge of the known universe, and that’s just how Niko Larson, former admiral in the Grand Military of the Hive Mind, likes it. Retired and finally free of the continual war of conquest, Niko and the remnants of her former unit are content to spend the rest of their days working at the restaurant they built together, The Last Chance. But, some wars can’t ever be escaped, and unlike the Hive Mind, some enemies aren’t content to let old soldiers go.

Floating in a sentient space balloon with his pants around his ankles, Geddy watched a competing salvage trawler swallow his one-of-a-kind ship. Could it get any worse? Most definitely. The For Sale Make Offer's fateful trip to Kigantu ended with a daring escape, but Geddy's checkered past as a partly reformed henchman came back to haunt him. Now, the Penetrator is gone, and he doesn't know where. The newly expanded crew of the Fizmo welcomes him as their new captain, but it'll take more than a can-do attitude and witty repartee to be a working ship.

Promoted early, Desmond McLaughlin and his mates are now full members of the Hegemony military, with all the rights and duties that rank includes. Given the benefits of achieving the rank of full adept early, Desmond and company elected to be deployed aboard the battlecruiser Fist of Defiance, a ship that just happened to be part of the Seventh Border Fleet. The same fleet headed by a certain admiral whose daughter was saved by Desmond and his girls.

After saving the grim and gritty alien city of Down Here from something big, mean, and mind-bendingly horrible, Dan is looking forward to unwinding in the closest available bar. Annoyingly, the universe has other ideas. Instead, Dan finds himself investigating a cheating husband, two horrible murders, and the potential enslavement of everyone in the galaxy. With his caseload stretching his woefully limited detective skills, his car in pieces, and the whole "being dead" thing not doing him any favors, Dan has no choice but to ask his friends for help.

Captain Vance Turbo has been struggling for the past few years, his reputation in tatters and most of his allies having turned against him. Offered a chance to go after a sinister crime syndicate at a peace treaty in Notha Space, he jumps at it. However, no sooner does he do so that he discovers that a malevolent AI and even more powerful forces are at work...ones that threaten everyone and everything in the galaxy. Will Vance somehow stumble his way into saving the universe again or will his luck finally run out?

George and Harold have played a trick or two on nearly everyone at Jerome Horwitz Elementary. When their latest prank causes the school’s cranky cafeteria ladies to quit, Mr. Krupp hires a trio of unusual replacements - who happen to look an awful lot like aliens! Will that curtain-caped crusader, Captain Underpants, save the day once more? Or will those outer space cafeteria ladies have him for lunch? The Captain Underpants series is perfect for listeners of all ages.

Cal Carver and his Space Team may have lost their ship, but they haven't lost their knack for attracting trouble. Just hours after setting foot on a new planet, Cal and the crew find themselves caught up in an interplanetary kidnapping plot. Reuniting the suspiciously-silent young victim with her parents on their far-off home world will make Cal rich beyond his wildest dreams. Unfortunately, half the pirates and bounty hunters in the galaxy have the same idea, and they're more than happy to take the girl by force.

When Pegasus Quincy, sheriff’s deputy, steps into the leaky rowboat to investigate a murder at a mysterious artists’ colony, her troubles have just begun. A new detective blames Peg when she gets snake bit. A friend gets caught in a drug raid and asks Peg’s assistance. Her new roomie monopolizes the kitchen, until Peg’s coonhound Reckless eats too many French macarons. And then there is the cat lady who accuses Peg of stealing a valuable painting. Surely Peg wouldn’t do that, would she? Join Pegasus Quincy as she delves into the nefarious underworld of art auctions, mid-century ...

Suicide Squad meets Galaxy Quest, in this fast-paced, laugh-out-loud novel from the author the Independent calls, "the new Terry Pratchett." After saving an alien race and its god from a sentient zombie virus, Cal Carver and the crew of the Dread Ship Shatner are feeling pretty pleased with themselves. Unfortunately, the creator of the zombie virus is out for revenge, and has recruited the galaxy's deadliest - and oldest - assassin, Lady Vajazzle, to hunt Space Team down.