Ambiguous Loss

Learning to Live with Unresolved Grief

De: Pauline Boss PhD

Narrado por: Rosemary Benson

When a loved one dies, we mourn our loss. We take comfort in the rituals that mark the passing, and we turn to those around us for support. But what happens when there is no closure, when a family member or a friend who may be still alive is lost to us nonetheless? How, for example, does the mother whose soldier son is missing in action, or the family of an Alzheimer's patient who is suffering from severe dementia, deal with the uncertainty surrounding this kind of loss?

In this sensitive and lucid account, Pauline Boss explains that, all too often, those confronted with such ambiguous loss fluctuate between hope and hopelessness. Suffered too long, these emotions can deaden feeling and make it impossible for people to move on with their lives. Yet the central message of this book is that they can move on. Drawing on her research and clinical experience, Boss suggests strategies that can cushion the pain and help families come to terms with their grief. Her work features the heartening narratives of those who cope with ambiguous loss and manage to leave their sadness behind, including those who have lost family members to divorce, immigration, adoption, chronic mental illness, and brain injury. With its message of hope, this eloquent book offers guidance and understanding to those struggling to regain their lives.

©1999 the President and Fellows of Harvard College (P)2021 Tantor

a very solid piece

as a counselor, I found this to be thorough. as a general person, I found it to be easy to read and I think it will be very helpful to several in my life and Counseling practice

An incredibly helpful book!

The concept of ambiguous loss has been a game changer for me. And this book is written for a general audience, with lots of helpful and interesting anecdotes. It works well as an audiobook.

For caretakers.

A must read for all Caretakers. Ambiguous grieving is real and more people need to be talking about it

Great resource- needs more

This is a great beginning it would be wonderful to have an updated version, to include non-binary pronouns, Queer family voices, especially to represent lived experiences of adoptees is significantly more so transracial adoptees TRA.

Wonderful book but limited topics

This is a lovely and heartfelt book. I only wish it covered more types of grief. If you have a loved one with terminal illness you may find it very useful, since about half the book talks about dealing with Alzheimer's. Other topics mentioned a great deal are separation due to immigration, and missing persons - mostly military MIA. There's also a heavy emphasis on families working together to cope with grief, and not much for individuals.

I didn't find it very helpful for the losses I'm currently grieving, the most painful and predominant one being the mostly unexplained estrangement and rejection by my cherished daughter. This book doesn't seem to offer much for anyone whose loss was chosen by the other person and with little explanation. I suppose it would be possible to very carefully analyze and see what principles and suggestions could be somehow adapted to my particular situation, but it would be a stretch, and while I'm hurting so badly I'm in no shape to work that hard. I do feel like I'd want to give chapter 9 (The Benefit of a Doubt) another listen since it's more generalized and philosophical.

I do highly recommend the book for people who are caregivers for family members with terminal illness, especially Alzheimer's. That is its greatest strength.

Very helpful

My mom has Alzheimer’s and this book has been the most helpful thing I’ve read.

Creativity

Related to by mother whose adult children who are part of the go no contact with your mother. Its wrong to make that choice

the informations relevancy

this is so important for all of us to hear for all of us in these times

Helpful and yet...

Very helpful anecdotally yet very dry in the presentation. Feel more informed, though, and empowered in how I'm handling my own ambiguous loss.

Simple and powerful

Pauline does a wonderful job discussing ambiguous loss through stories and case studies. I am grateful to have read this book, it will help me significantly.