Teenage Humor

MAVERICK: I might have been a crappy excuse for a big brother in the past, but now I’m making up for lost time… And time isn’t the only thing that’s lost. So is my sister, Astrid. So, I do what any good brother would do—I go after her. Concealing my true identity, I attend Blood Rose Academy as a professor of potions. And along for the ride is my new wife, Taliyah. Not only am I hoping we can find Astrid, but I’m really hoping we find her alive. ASTRID: Even though I definitely have a thing for vampires, that doesn’t mean I wanted to become one… And it definitely didn’t ...

“Outstanding kid series!” “J-One, come in J-One,” radioed Robert. “I think we’ve found something!” Book 7 in the award-winning Wright Cousin Adventures series! An unusual seaplane, friends threatened by forest fires, and a surprising mountain discovery. The Wright Cousins have come into good fortune and have just inherited an airplane. They have big plans to use it for good and to help solve a mystery in the nearby mountains. Things seem to be going well but someone keeps sabotaging their efforts. When a lightning storm starts hundreds of fires in the mountain range, hikers ...

Terry Pratchett's final Discworld novel, and the fifth to feature the witch Tiffany Aching.

Gork isn't like the other dragons at WarWings Military Academy. He has a gigantic heart, two-inch horns, and an occasional problem with fainting. His nickname is Weak Sauce, and his Will to Power ranking is Snacklicious - the lowest in his class. But he is determined not to let any of this hold him back as he embarks on the most important mission of his life: Tonight, on the eve of his high school graduation, he must ask a female dragon to be his queen. If she says yes, they'll go off to conquer a foreign planet together. If she says no, Gork becomes a slave.

In Carry On, Simon Snow and his friends realized that everything they thought they understood about the world might be wrong. And in Wayward Son, they wondered whether everything they understood about themselves might be wrong. In Any Way the Wind Blows, Simon and Baz and Penelope and Agatha have to decide how to move forward.

With their parents away on a month-long cruise to Cancún, Kjell was looking forward to a dream summer vacation. But when his sister Eyja and her friend Cady casts a spell over him, turning him into a woman, his plans are shattered. Will he able to get his body back, iron out his relationship with his sister's friend, and what happens when the high priestess discovers that Eyja and Cady have been abusing magic?

We've all had times we wanted to give up. To throw in the towel. To make a break and get away from everything. The exact breaking point and how we handled it is different for all of us. For Jordan Lewis, a rebellious teen struggling with his parents' impending divorce and a breakup of his own, that point comes when he gets suspended from school and dumped on his irascible grandfather, Charlie Kalb. For Charlie, a wily widower who hasn't had anything to look forward to in years except attending the final game at Yankee Stadium, it comes when his driving buddy suffers a stroke, his trip to ...

When Rán Hollander’s sister calls with the news that their father had a tragic accident on Lake Michigan, Rán drops everything and returns to a small town that turned its back on her years earlier. Was the death an accident, a suicide, or something much worse? Rán goes undercover to discover what really happened. Along the way, Rán discovers an intruder in her grandmother’s Victorian mansion who refuses to leave. It doesn’t help that his dog hates Rán's huge calico cat, Murgatroyd. And don’t forget the so-not-engaged ring that almost ruins Rán's life. Join the Hollander clan, ...

Rael wakes to find herself at an unexpected crossroads in her young life. She has come on vacation to Europe in hopes of forgetting about the past, including failing at the most critical thing in her life: skiing. Of course, at sixteen nearly everything can feel like the most important thing in your life at any moment. Still, Rael is pretty sure training for six years and losing her big race by a tenth of a second is the lowest possible point her life can reach. Well, she was sure of that—until she wakes up in a stone room, alone, bound by rope, and in the care of a vampire. A situation ...

After a summer of meeting handsome French boys and getting a tiny bit sunburnt. OK, fine - a lot sunburnt, Lottie's heading off on a week-long residential school trip. A whole week away from embarrassing parents and Toby's tasty air biscuits! But the trip soon turns into a total disaster. The other girls staying at the camp are MEGA-MEAN, best friend Jess is spending all her time with new girl Isha, and Lottie's diary gets stolen! Who knew a school trip could cause so much DRAMA?!

Mary Elizabeth (or Lola, as she prefers to be called) longs to be in the spotlight. But when she moves to New Jersey with her family, Lola discovers that the role of resident drama queen at Dellwood "Deadwood" High has already been filled by the Born-to-Win, Born-to-Run-Everything Carla Santini. Once the curtain goes up on the school play, which drama queen will take center stage?

I just returned from the mall after school shopping with my soon-to-be sophomore and her friend. I now understand why fathers opt to go camping, roll around in elk urine, and shit in a hole rather than go to the mall three days before school starts. As if the crowds weren’t bad enough, my girl decided to wear a flannel that hung lower than her shorts, making it appear that she was walking around naked from the waist down. She was flocked by sales people, who, I am sure, were calculating their commissions in their heads. I mean, why not?

Some teenagers enjoy listening to jokes but have difficulty telling them. For those who say that they can't tell jokes, the answer is "Yes you can learn to tell jokes." This audiobook includes teenage jokes, why we tell jokes, and how to tell jokes.

It s Belfast, 1977. The King is dead and a 14-year-old boy wearing Denim aftershave has just been appointed breadboy in the last Ormo Mini-Shop in the world, delivering bread to the residents of the Upper Shankill on Saturday mornings. He s all grown up now, so he is, and nearly shaving. The Bee Gees fill the airwaves, everyone is in love with Princess Leia, and Breadboy s love of peace and pets is soon rivalled by his interest in parallel universes and punk...and girls, especially Judy Carlton who sits opposite him in chemistry.

Dirk Lloyd has a dark secret. He is the earthly incarnation of a Dark Lord, supreme ruler of the Darklands and leader of armies of orcs and warriors intent on destruction. Following a final battle between the forces of good and evil, the Dark Lord was defeated and hurled into the Pit of Uttermost Despair. At the bottom of the Pit is a supermarket car park in the town of Whiteshields, in modern day England. When he is found, and tries to explain that he is the Dark Lord, people think he means Dirk Lloyd.

We are all familiar with the hormones, the illogical rage, the awful time keeping and the daily dramarama. However, you don’t know that they will steal your stuff (and claim you never had it in the first place), bruise your self-esteem just as you hit your melancholy midlife and love/hate you all day long with exhausting regularity seconds after turning 13. This stage of motherhood is not for the fainthearted. These are the loneliest of maternal times filled with pockets of shame you cannot share with anyone. You’re going to need help getting through this.

Who is 'ER? What is she? A medieval beauty whose likeness was carved on a brass burial plate back in the 14th century.... Switch to the 1960s. The lady is still snugly interred at the bottom of what is now an English garden attached to a rented house in the sleep town of Poke-on-Thames. Along comes a schoolteacher/archaeology buff fresh out of St. Louis, Missouri, who exhumes her from a bed of dahlia corms. The discovery - a rare and valuable find - sets off a chain of events that shatters the town's perennial tranquility to its staid foundations.

This is the second novella in the series Donald Trump: Necromancer. It is a work of political parody and therefore protected by the first amendment. This novella follows the progress of vampire folk singer Phil Ochs and the scientist Magnus along with their allies Aiko the were-panda, a druid, and an incredibly strong Good Old Boy named Zeus as they attempt to stop the evilest president in history who also happens to be a necromancer.

A Crafty Cigarette is the powerful story of a teenager coming of age in the '70s as seen through his eyes; who, on the cusp of adulthood, discovers a band that is new to him, which leads him into becoming a Mod.

Sunnyville Residential Home, the final resting place of Sunnyville's geriatric population. Where mint bonbons and Fixodent abound, and where Maisie Bruce's semi-antique grandmother yearns for more visitors - just one would be nice. Then, when life couldn't possibly become any more tedious, they wheel him in. A strange and crinkly old man named Drake, a man professing to be a famous count from Transylvania. But vampires aren't real, are they?