Welcome To Patchwork

By: Christian Dion and Josh
  • Summary

  • **Nominated for 'Best Comedy' at the Australian Podcast Awards 2018 & 2019** Have you ever wondered if it’s acceptable to bring food to someone's house and take it back home if no one has eaten it? Well if you have, then you’re in good company. Christian, Dion and Josh are Welcome to Patchwork: An Australian comedy podcast that thinks too hard about the monotony of life. By debating the obvious, challenging social conventions and improvising sketches, we're more concerned with the crumbs than the cookie.
    2024 Welcome To Patchwork
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Episodes
  • Patch #134 - Can You Handle Silence In Conversations?
    Sep 3 2024

    We have wiped away the emotional cobwebs of the Depression Sessions and are ready for a little more unstructured fun. Christian picks up on Josh's brute force attempt to bring colour to the podcast before we both become self-conscious of our most overused phrases. We quickly move onto discussing workplace attire and some of the characters in our workplaces. Is there anything wrong with wearing an oodie to work? Is wearing a suit antiquated?

    Christian reflects on the clever parenting technique his Mum employed to make him do a law degree while Josh reckons with how casually he has adjusted to an increase in spending to match his salary. We then grapple with the unfortunate reality that some people make more money than others despite their jobs having very little utility to the world.

    We then change topic to a conversation about changing topics. Josh tells Christian about an attempted hard steer topic change at a recent party. Did he need a proper segue between topics or can Josh just launch into what he wanted to talk about? Christian reveals that he's always got a conversation "up the barrel" before he and Josh talk about whether they struggle to deal with silences in conversations.

    Josh then tells Christian about a new friend who carries a Rubik's Cube and we discuss people who become incredibly good at one thing. Finally, we agree that the best way to waste time is playing silly games with friends.

    Follow us on Instagram, YouTube, TikTok, Twitter and Facebook to see clips from the show: linktr.ee/welcometopatchwork

    For a couple of dollars a month you can sign up to our Patreon page and get a bonus Patch every off week! Check out: www.patreon.com/welcometopatchwork

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    Support the show: https://www.patreon.com/welcometopatchwork

    See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

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    36 mins
  • Patch #133 - The Depression Sessions (Frankly Mr Chatly)
    Aug 20 2024

    On a cold Monday night in August 2024, tired from just existing, Josh and Christian decided to record Patch 133, "The Depression Sessions" aka Frankly Mr Chatly. For any first time listeners, this is not the Patch for you.

    Christian and Josh reflect on winter and the sadness of realising that you're already half way through the year. Christian and Josh then exchange some stories from a night out the week before; Christian looks like a little boy, Josh accidentally made a back zipper on his costume's pants.

    After a rubbish day, how do you self soothe? Do you get cosy like Josh? Do you need to numb your brain like Christian? Christian and Josh discuss ASMR, weighted blankets and keeping your mind distracted.

    Christian then asks Josh whether there's a healthy level of overthinking? How do you handle overthinking? Are you a good communicator? We then throw down some real introspection about our capacity to communicate with those around us. We also ask, what are your tools for falling asleep?

    Finally, we get really depressed over the bottomless pit of online content.

    Follow us on Instagram, YouTube, TikTok, Twitter and Facebook to see clips from the show: linktr.ee/welcometopatchwork

    For a couple of dollars a month you can sign up to our Patreon page and get a bonus Patch every off week! Check out: www.patreon.com/welcometopatchwork

    Support the show: https://www.patreon.com/welcometopatchwork

    See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

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    36 mins
  • Patch #132 - Is Your Fridge Overflowing With Half Filled Jars? ft. Nelson Allingham
    Aug 6 2024

    Christian and Josh are joined in the Patchwork studio by the handsome and hilarious Nelson Allingham, host of the Read It On Reddit podcast. Christian welcomes Nelson by confessing that he often passively listens to his podcast while completing chores before tragically revealing that he prematurely retired one of his jumpers from rotation by wearing it to bed. Nelson sympathises and offers a compromise of sleeping with no clothes but believes one of the tell tale signs of a sleep top, is the neckline. Josh reflects on waking himself up while sleep talking; Nelson sleep barks.

    Christian then opens up to Josh and Nelson about having a fridge full of half filled jars of different sauces, pastes and whatnots. How do you prevent this from happening? Should you use the entire contents of the jar every time a new one is opened, like Nelson and Josh? Or do you wait for the mercy of mould before you throw the jar out? Josh gives us the lowdown on the sharehouse experience while Christian sings the praises of baby food. We then discuss whether particular foods have greater rights over freezer space than others? Bread or salmon? Finally, Nelson offers up a fresh take on how to save space in the fridge - the King's Cup.

    After a particularly bad experience, Nelson asks Christian and Josh for help identifying the circumstances in which you can ignore a friend of a friend you see walking down the street. Does it matter whether you're having a bad day? Do you need to at least head nod? What if you can't think of anything to chat to them about? What if you don't want to get locked into a long chat? After walking us through his bad experience of being ignored, Nelson finally reveals that the 'friend of a friend' is in fact one of our own.

    With very special guests "Mad Lifts" and "Copy Cat" (Frank Walker from National Tiles).

    You can hear more of Nelson by listening to his podcast, Read It on Reddit.

    Follow us on Instagram, YouTube, TikTok, Twitter and Facebook to see clips from the show: linktr.ee/welcometopatchwork

    For a couple of dollars a month you can sign up to our Patreon page and get a bonus Patch every off week! Check out: www.patreon.com/welcometopatchwork

    Support the show: https://www.patreon.com/welcometopatchwork

    See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

    Show more Show less
    52 mins

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