Are you struggling to launch your adult child? Have you ever found yourself wondering if you're overstepping boundaries with your adult child? Maybe you're caught in the cycle of questioning how often to text them, whether to offer advice, or if you're supporting them the right way? You're not alone.

On this episode of the Brainy Moms podcast, Dr. Amy and Sandy talk with Dr. Jack Stoltzfus – clinical psychologist, America's launch coach, and author of "The Parent's Launch Code". Dr. Jack reveals that the transition to adult independence is challenging precisely because "the problem with young adults is they're adults, you can't control them." This fundamental shift requires parents to abandon old power dynamics and embrace a partnership approach.

Dr. Jack explains why this particular parenting stage feels so difficult, sharing eye-opening statistics including that more than 50% of young adults between 18-29 now live with their parents. Rather than viewing this as failure, he redefines successful launching as achieving self-sufficiency and responsibility, regardless of living situation. The real measure of success is whether young adults can stand independently while maintaining a caring bond with parents.

The conversation takes a poignant turn when discussing estrangement – with one in four young adults cutting off communication with parents for months or indefinitely. Dr. Jack offers practical strategies to prevent this heartbreaking outcome, including his innovative "five-year plan" approach that helps young adults envision their future while creating manageable steps toward independence.

Whether you're wrestling with questions about charging rent, setting boundaries when adult children return home from college, or navigating the delicate balance between offering support without enabling dependence, this episode provides compassionate guidance. Dr. Jack's framework of combining unconditional love with what he calls "backbone" (clear values and boundaries) offers a roadmap for maintaining connection while fostering independence. For every parent wondering how to love and launch simultaneously, this conversation is an essential guide to launching your adult child with confidence and care.

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