“Which wire could it be?” you wonder as the red numbers on the clock continue to disappear. Sweat pours down your forehead and into your eyes while you try to diffuse the 50 megaton explosive planted at the base of the satellite just about to launch. Hoping to avoid World War 3, you grip the pliers with a strength and precision unknown to mankind. It comes down to two wires, red and blue. As you confidently reach for the blue wire to severe its dastardly sinews, your phone chimes with a message. You’ve got to check, could be important. And indeed it is! A new episode of Hold Your Horses just dropped. You smile, thinking “Those boys are at it again.” And with that, you snip the blue wire, the numbers freeze, and the bomb is disarmed. Just another day at the office.

Ever think of starting a smart, fun, and successful podcast with some of your chums? Some might scoff and guffaw at you, saying to give up, “That’s just a pipe dream.” Well we horseman say NAY! Don’t listen to the haters and the naysayers, the negative Nancies and sour Sallies, the rude Rachels and the mean Michelles, the glaring Guses and idiotic Ichabods. We say, start that podcast! Find a shed! Get some mics with your chums! Keep your chin up, Jimmy. Someday, maybe your show will be as good your favorite podcast…. It’s a new episode of Hold Your Horses!

“And so, you want to put the utter in between your thumb and forefinger,” the stoic farmer explained to the young boy standing next to him. Staring at the dirt, the boy was quiet. “Joash!” the farmer barked as he looked up at the boy. “Are you paying attention? I won’t always be here to show you how to do everything, that’s why I’m showing you now!” Joash patted the large cow in front of them on the rump as he readjusted to get a clear view of the dangling utters. “Yessir, I’m watching,” he muttered. “Good, now, as I was saying—” Just as the farmer was going to demonstrate again, the cow let out a huge moo and began faltering. Before the farmer could see what was happening, the cow fell in his direction and pinned him to the ground. “Great leaping leprechauns! Joash! I’m stuck, I can’t move. I can’t breathe! Go get help!” Joash sprang into action. “Yessir! I’ll be back in a jiffy,” he sang as he bolted out of sight. “Wha-? When are you coming back? I need help now!”