Dale Davidson, oil tycoon and poet, passed away alone in the middle of the woods near a binturong. Followed around by his reporter and maybe intimate confidant Michael Leahcim, Dale was known as being as rich as Chappelle Roan until his untimely demise. Davidson had three dreams (finding oil, forming a small country in the middle of Germany, and writing fact-based poetry) and he led a life of deceit and backwards last names in order to achieve all three, destroying his marriage of convenience along the way. His last will and testament leaves all of his money to his wife and arch-nemesis Jessica, and his funeral will be held somewhere - unfortunately a paper boy ripped out the last page of the newspaper so no one will know where. NEW EPISODE THURSDAY!

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(1992 - 2025) Lisa Bergen, theoretically someone with a job, died this week after doing improv. As an orphan who was an orphan for as long as she's been an orphan, Bergen spent her days on this volatile planet hitting comedy clubs in the hopes of making a go of it in the Brooklyn improv scene. Despite completely never telling anyone anything about her passion for performing for fear of getting killed by her boss, Bergen was best known (or not-known) for her improv comedy group Elbow's Head - drawing crowds of sometimes six people. Her rival group One Foot A Head will host her memorial will be next week, with a secret performance on ukulele by her co-worker Daniel at the subway station over Bossa Nova Civic Club. New Episode Thursday!! (you can follow Adrienne Hunter IRL on insta @projectadrienne)