On this episode we'll share personal insights on maintaining the delicate balance between accepting our children for who they are and the natural urge to shape their world.

The heart of our discussion lies in the emotional tug-of-war between hopes and reality. Feelings of loss and sadness come into play when all the love and effort poured into creating nurturing spaces aren't always met with the enthusiasm we'd hoped for. Through candid stories, we uncover the tension between the desire to be a supportive, loving parent and the need to shield ourselves from potential rejection. We ponder the idea that good parenting is akin to revealing a masterpiece within a block of marble, allowing children to flourish naturally, without undue influence.

In our conversation we confront life's inevitable compromises and how to find peace amidst them. Sharing tools for managing emotions, we embrace the chaos while celebrating small victories, and learn to coexist with conflicting emotions. The complexities of adoption and personal growth become a tapestry woven with moments of beauty and acceptance, demonstrating that sometimes, simply being present for our loved ones, despite the mess, is the greatest achievement.

How does a missed meeting at Starbucks transform into a lifelong friendship that helps navigate the challenges of foster care and adoption? Join us as Danielle Browning and I share the story of our unique bond, forged through shared experiences and mutual support. We open up about the unspoken rules of friendship that have been our lifeline as we journey through the complexities of parenting children from hard places. Through candid conversations and shared laughter, our friendship has become a source of emotional stability and reassurance, illuminating the path through some of life’s most demanding moments.

Danielle and I dig into the profound freedom our friendship offers, a space where we can express difficult truths without fear of judgment. Whether it’s a road trip filled with anxiety or the everyday struggles of post-adoption life, we stand by each other as unwavering pillars of support. Our bond is the epitome of a "ride or die" partnership, showcasing the importance of having someone who truly understands the intricacies of the adoption and foster care community. We navigate the unpredictable paths together, celebrating the resilience and strength found in our shared journey.

From the pride of watching our children reach significant milestones to grappling with dreams that didn’t turn out as expected, our conversation touches on the highs and lows of motherhood and friendship. We reflect on the complexities of relationships, the evolving bonds with our teenagers, and the joy that comes from supportive connections amidst life's challenges. The episode wraps up with a lighthearted lightning round, sharing what brings joy to our everyday lives, from delightful homemade treats to inspiring podcasts. Tune in to experience the warmth and wisdom of a friendship that is as rewarding as it is resilient.

Embark on an unexpected journey with Ted Stackpole, a pastor who, alongside his wife Angie, opened their hearts and home to foster care and adoption, transforming their lives and those of the many children they've welcomed. Initially hesitant, their adventure began through a connection with a church family and an exploration of adoption ministry. Their path led to the formation of a supportive community that helped navigate the complex world of fostering and adoption, ultimately expanding their family to 11 children. Ted and Angie now serve as missionary chaplains, dedicating their lives to fostering and adoption communities across the nation.

Our conversation shines a light on the powerful role that church-based ministries play in supporting foster families. With the leadership of experienced foster and adoptive families, these ministries offer a lifeline, providing wraparound care systems that include meal deliveries and house cleaning, preventing burnout among foster parents. We explore the impact of such ministries, where five families fostered 50 children and completed 18 adoptions in three years, and discuss how the church can be a beacon of support for vulnerable populations, even if not everyone feels called to foster or adopt.

We also delve into the spiritual dimensions of fostering and adoption, viewing these acts as services to Jesus while navigating the challenges of family dynamics. From managing the complexities of fostering multiple children to creating nurturing environments for those who have experienced trauma, we discuss the vital support systems that make these journeys possible. Innovative approaches, such as online classes and Project One Home, offer valuable resources for foster families, fostering connections and stability. We conclude by emphasizing the importance of community champions in sustaining these efforts and the need for personal spiritual reflection to maintain balance and growth.

Imagine embarking on a journey that fundamentally reshapes your notion of family. That's what my husband, Brad Harvin, and I, Rebecca Harvin, experienced when we decided to embrace foster care and adoption. Through raw and heartfelt exchanges, Brad opens up about the surprise and commitment he felt when I first shared my unwavering intention to foster and adopt. His spontaneous decision to join me on this path has deeply impacted our lives. Therapy has played a crucial role in navigating this transformation, as we unpack the challenges and growth it has brought to our relationship. Our story offers a candid peek into our partnership, touching on our mutual support and shared vision for creating a loving family and community.

Adopting and fostering are accompanied by emotional highs and lows, especially as we welcome new children into our lives. We unpack the excitement, uncertainty, and emotional burdens that come with managing trauma and maintaining a peaceful home environment. Brad and I bring to light how we handle these challenges differently yet strive to balance our roles as partners, supporting each other and our children. By sharing our personal experiences, we highlight the importance of emotional resilience, mutual understanding, and the complex dynamics that shape our family life.

Our journey would not be complete without the supportive community we've built around us, particularly for Brad as a dad and husband. Forming meaningful connections with other men in similar situations, like our friend Dave, has been vital. We discuss the comfort in sharing experiences and navigating the nuances of parenting within the foster and adoption context. Additionally, we explore the transition from foster care to adoption, reflecting on attachment, permanency, and the emotional intricacies of family dynamics. Through these honest conversations, we aim to foster a community where listeners feel connected, understood, and inspired to share their own experiences.

What happens when a birth kid grows up in a foster and adoptive family and becomes an advocate for others in similar situations? Daniela Coates, a licensed social worker, adoptive mother, and foster parent, shares her personal and professional journey with us. Through her organization, With Siblings, Daniela is doing groundbreaking work by focusing on the voices and experiences of birth children in foster and adoptive families. Her insights shed light on the complex emotional landscape that these kids navigate and the importance of support systems that truly see and hear them.

Join us as Daniela opens up about the struggles she faced as a child, feeling invisible amid new family dynamics and grappling with the challenges of being a pastor's child. She recounts the poignant memories of saying goodbye to foster siblings and how these experiences led her to embrace fostering formally. Daniela’s story is one of resilience, highlighting the balance and fulfillment that fostering can bring, even in the face of temporary relationships.

As the conversation continues, we delve into the universal emotions of feeling unseen, as depicted in Daniela's book "The Day Lily Turned Uninvisible." We explore the duality of emotions birth kids experience, the importance of empowering their voices, and the need for open dialogue about the hard truths in foster care narratives. Daniela's journey from agency work to creating a global support network underscores the significance of addressing these nuanced family dynamics with empathy and understanding. Tune in to learn how Daniela's work can inspire more comprehensive conversations about the mental health and well-being of all children in the foster care system.

How do you find the strength to open your heart and home to children in need? Danae Bunso, the Florida State Director for Isaiah 117 House in Duval County, joins us to share her and her husband Carl's incredible journey of fostering and adopting children. With 30 foster experiences and two adoptions alongside their six biological children, Danae provides an intimate look at the emotional and spiritual path to embracing foster care, touching on the power of surrender, the challenges of adoption, and the importance of being present for children on their hardest days.

Danae opens up about the deep spiritual journey that foster care has led her family on, where the balancing act between fighting for justice and surrendering control becomes a daily practice. We explore transformative encounters that mirror the kingdom of God at work, highlighting moments of heartache, hope, and joy. Through these stories, listeners will gain insight into the often chaotic yet profoundly rewarding experience of fostering, the importance of community support, and the mission behind Isaiah 117 House to reduce trauma for children entering foster care.

Rooted in faith, Danae's reflections on hope and rest offer a sense of community and encouragement to those who listen. She shares personal anecdotes about seeking solace in spiritual practices and engaging activities, revealing how these moments bring nourishment beyond physical stillness. Through heartfelt discussions, we underscore the shared challenges and victories within the fostering circle, inviting everyone to connect, share, and support one another on this journey. Tune in for a message of hope, commitment, and the transformative impact of opening one's home and heart to children in need.

What happens when the pursuit of perfection meets the messy reality of motherhood and adoption? Join us for an intimate conversation with Tanya Hardaker, who opens up about her journey through foster care, adoption, and self-discovery. Tanya's raw honesty sheds light on the societal pressures faced by women, especially in the Southern evangelical context, and the liberation found in embracing imperfection. Together, we share personal experiences, challenging the notion of the "perfect" mom and exploring how authenticity can lead to genuine connections and a deeper understanding of faith and community.

Tanya and I take you on a heartfelt journey into the complexities of foster care and adoption, revealing the unexpected beauty and challenges that come with it. We reflect on how adopting a sibling set reshaped our notions of family and spirituality, pushing us beyond the bounds of traditional church life into a more authentic, albeit messier, faith. The emotional toll and sacrifices are real, yet they are met with the unwavering commitment and support needed to navigate this path. Our candid dialogue uncovers the profound impact of community involvement in supporting foster and adoptive families, emphasizing the necessity of a supportive network during challenging times.

Building a supportive community is a lifeline, and we find strength in coming together through support groups like Seek Refuge. We discuss the importance of creating a welcoming environment for caregivers, the power of community-driven efforts like Christmas toy drives, and how tangible support can prevent unnecessary family separations. This episode is a testament to the resilience fostered through open, honest conversations and the hope found in everyday struggles. Join us as we celebrate the small victories and the profound difference community support can make in the lives of those navigating the foster and adoption journey.